Leaf Style Maelstrom
by Soulblazer87
Summary: 'Leaf Style Shinobi, Uzumaki Naruto' So he had introduced himself. What about if that became a little bit more... literal? No decided pairings  if ever, new jutsu and general insanity.
1. Chapter 1

_Summary: 'Leaf Style Shinobi, Uzumaki Naruto!' So he had introduced himself. What about if that became a little bit more... literal?_

**A/N: This fic is to be adopted by anyone who wants to, at any point in time. I will help with techniques and such, but I don't have the patience to start a new fic. It's more of a plot bunny but it deserves its own attention.**

_Chapter 1: Midori no Ha, The Green Leaves_

Naruto sighed as he took off his orange jumpsuit and layed it on a chair, no use cleaning right now, too late, too tired to care.

Too darn proud and happy to care either!

He had just become a shinobi! After three years of failing and ridicule, he had done it!

And all it took was sneaking into the Hokage Tower, stealing a scroll and learning a jutsu from it!

Which brings him to his current thoughts.

Namely that 'Jutsu are awesome'. Of course, who would thing anything else?

But, the problem is that... he doesn't know that many. Sure, he has the Kawarimi and Henge, just now got the Kage Bunshin too, but that's not enough. How can it be enough?

First order of business is getting more in his arsenal. It would only be fair too; everyone else had their families teaching them taijutsu and ninjutsu and all kinds of jutsu.

Naruto had no one. He was all alone. So he had no one to teach him or show him or just tell him it would all be fine when he got scared.

But now he had the old man and Iruka-sensei, so it was better, but still...

He needed more jutsu. Because he planned to have a family, with many children. And what father would let their child go without as much cool teachings as possible?

"New jutsu huh... I gotta get me some of those..." He mumbled to himself.

Easier said than done though when you're the scapegoat of the entire village, for no good reason at that either!

So where could he get some new jutsu? The old man was probably busy, he was the darn Hokage after all. And Iruka-sensei was injured.

Asking the Kyuubi no Kitsune would be an eternity too early no matter when he did it.

But there was no one else to ask. So what could he do?

He thought some more on it but decided that it hurt his mind when he overthought things and went to sleep.

Just as his sleep took him however, he remembered something from Iruka's lectures, one of the few he had ever bothered to listen to. "All the Hokages made their own special techniques that gave them an edge over every other enemy. These same techniques we use today as proud Konoha Shinobi!"

So, since he was going to be a Hokage... He needed his own techniques!

That was about the first thought that came to his mind when he woke up. But what to do?

What kind of super-awesome-cool technique could he make that no one else had ever made?

It would have to be original, cool and easy to use, strong as well but hard to copy or imitate...

So... So he did the one thing he thought he'd never have to do...

Go to... The Library.

You see, most people think that Naruto is an idiot and completely inept. That is a mistaken perception. He is actually quite smart and quick of wit.

However, he lacks 'knowledge' and 'understanding', the two things that actually turn intellect and wisdom into a usable force. Which is why every time any teacher actually bothered to sit down with Naruto to teach him something, he seemed to pick it up at light speed. Too bad nobody ever cared about the orphan enough to actually look at him away from their preconceptions and own expectations.

But Naruto knew that, he knew he wasn't an idiot, he just didn't know about stuff. Mostly because nobody ever told him anything, they just took things for granted. Therefore, since he couldn't depend on anyone any more, he was a ninja now, he had to do it on his own.

And that meant... *shiver* studying...

Which in turn meaning having to go to the Library.

Getting in was hard, or annoying more like it, but after showing off his headband, and suffering nearly an hour of authenticity checking, he managed to get in.

Now to find books on jutsu theory, chakra manipulation theory, jutsu creation theory, jutsu analysis theory...

Well, any kind of 'theory' that had to do with chakra, techniques and jutsu.

Aaaand... Bingo! 'Steps to Jutsu Alteration and Creation for Beginners by A.R.'

Whoever that A.R. guy was, he was a godsend to Naruto!

So, the blonde took the book and went to a corner to study.

_"Jutsu creation is neither harder than it is speculated but neither is it easier than hoped to be. It is an artform where one understands himself first and the world around them second. For that to be done, a unique kind of mind is necessary; one that both accepts one's self but also seeks to further understand, a natural-born inquisitive."_

_"Most commonly jutsu are separated in several categories, further separated by elements or effects; Ninjutsu, (split into General, also known as Ninpo, Katon, Fuuton, Suiton, Raiton and Doton, in no particular order), Iryo-jutsu, Fuinjutsu (Barriers and Seals), Genjutsu (Visual and Emotional) and Taijutsu (Weapons, Barehanded, Enhanced). However those distinctions are wrong."_

_"There are only two types of jutsu, who combine in a third. These two types are 'Emit' type jutsu and 'Reinforce' type jutsu."_

_"Emit types create something from nothing, such as fire or electricity, to give a rather vulgar example, but also include Barriers and almost all types of Genjutsu. Its greatest advantage is that it requires little setup to initiate; usually just the handseals and chakra used. However, due to its nature of creating things out of nothing, it also has a great chakra cost and requires great control lest the technique goes berserk and backfires."_

_"Reinforce type instead alters and/or augments a substances natural abilities. Examples are most Doton jutsu, almost all forms of Taijutsu and several types of emotional or sense-altering Genjutsu as well as all types of Iryo-jutsu. It has the advantage of requiring less chakra and control as they rarely go berserk, instead they simply burn out the medium of use (with the notable exception of Iryo-jutsu who instead burn out the target and are therefore extremely dangerous and so will not be discussed further to avoid accidents). However, as a disadvantage, they require a setup before being used, the medium through which they will be channeled, be it water or earth."_

_"The third type is 'Combine' and it is made out of combining the principles of Emit and Reinforce types. However, it is extremely rare to find someone even capable of using such a jutsu, much less someone who can actually make a new Combine type jutsu. However, they are the strongest type of jutsu as they have very few to no weaknesses apart from their humongous chakra cost and general lack of people who can use them."_

_"For one to create their own technique, it isn't as easy as using several handseals in order and willing something to happen."_

_"The prospective creator must keep the following rules in mind."_

_"The First Rule; What type of jutsu it is. Emit, Reinforce or the, extremely rare, Combine type? As the latter is the rarest, and most dangerous, the prospective creator should focus on creating a technique using one of the first two archetypes. Do not stray from the chosen type, do not try to crossover and keep a clear mind on what you want your jutsu to do. For starters, choose a relatively simple concept, such as reinforcing the hardness of a fragile item or creating a small gust of wind. This process determines the first handseal of a jutsu if any are used._

_"The Second Rule; What is its expression. How does the jutsu do what you wish it to do. Simply throwing chakra cannot accomplish anything; you have to shape it, change it and alter it to your needs. Does the jutsu create a gust of flame or does it toughen your armor? Does it create the illusion of fire or does it enhance your arm muscles? Again, keeping a clear focus on what you intend to do is extremely important. This process determines the last handseal of a jutsu if any are used."_

_"The Third Rule; How and why does it occur. How does your jutsu perform what it is needed to do? It may be as simple as a gout of flame or as complex as a dragon shaped manifestation of lightning. It may be merely enhancing the muscles by improving their endurance or it could be shifting the entirety of the body's humours to certain locations for either defence or offence. This process finalizes the intermitent handseals of the jutsu if any are used and makes it stable."_

_"The Golden, and final Rule; Know your limits. Do not attempt an untested jutsu in harsh conditions (read; combat, stress, lack of rest, sickness) or unaided. If possible use clones (ideally Kage Bunshin for their ability to copy the user's knowledge, memories and skills as well as transfer any gained information back to the user upon dispelling) and have an ally standing by to provide help or a superior to supervise. Test the technique extensively to make sure no instability is noted and that it can be performed easily and without need of much focus; add more handseals to the sequence if it needs further stability or remove if they are not necessary."_

_"If you are able to keep these simple rules in mind, then you can create (or recreate) almost any type of jutsu. Read on the next chapter as to hints on what type of ninjutsu would best suit the starting creator. Good luck."_

After that was a list of chapters on anything related to jutsu construction. Unfortunately, it also took some things for certain; namely that the reader have understood several chakra theories and completed various chakra control excercises.

"Eeeeh..." Naruto sighed dissapointed. "I'll have to study even more? Can't be helped I guess..."

But throughoug his reading, he thought about one thing constantly; what kind of jutsu should he make? What could he make that would be original enough to actually suit him?

What? What could he make?

Katon, raiton, suiton, doton, fuuton... they were all so common, everyone knew them. Anything he would think up, someone else must have already thought about.

Genjutsu... he sucked, he couldn't even make a bunshin, now he just knew he had waaaay too much chakra to ever use right.

Taijutsu... he had no idea of it; Mizuki-teme never taught him even the basics, something he'd have to fix as soon as possible.

Fuinjutsu? Nuh-uh, not good with calligraphy and again, no teaching prior. And best leave Iryo-jutsu out of it as well...

What to do, what to do...

Then he remembered the previous night: "Who am I? I'm Leaf-Style shinobi, Uzumaki Naruto-dattebayo!"

Leaf-style shinobi huh?

The seed of an idea planted itself into Naruto's mind and he grinned like never before.

Oh yes, he could do this, he would do this!

"Leaf-style indeed..."

But for now, he had more studying to do.

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Haru no Saisho no Hi (First Day Of Spring)

Hatake Kakashi was a busy, busy man. He was also a pervert and one of Konoha's strongest jounin, a candidate for Hokage even!

So why the hell was he saddled with three brats again? Damn, being a jounin-sensei would really mess up his time.

Not like the brats were anything special anyway.

Just Uchiha Sasuke, the top student of the year and last Uchiha. Haruno Sakura, civilian-born girl with the highest theoretical rankings achieved in years. Uzumaki Naruto, the idiot and dead-last of the class, somehow also a jinchuuriki.

Of course, nobody said that Sasuke had a stick the size of a bridge shoved up his ass or that Sakura was a raving fangirl or that Uzumaki Naruto considered 'jutsu making' a hobby.

Well alright, maybe the brats were a bit special, hopefully not in the bad way. He'd have to do something about that, wouldn't he?

But that would have to wait after they passed, if they passed, the test he was currently giving them. And they didn't look like they were going to make it; he had already beaten them all in their respective 'specialties'.

What more could a bunch of 13 year olds do to him? A hundred times zero is still zero...

Hatake Kakashi would find it out the hard way.

Because Naruto was sick and tired of it. Kakashi underestimated him like everyone did! Nobody believed in him! So, he decided that if loud and brash didn't work, he'd use loud and brash with a side of sneaky in it. He wasn't Konoha's Prankster King for nothing; he could be pretty darn sneaky when he wanted to.

First order of business; get Sasuke, Sakura-chan, for all her beauty and smarts, would be useless in a fight. Even he could tell that.

"So, how's it going there, feeling nice and cozy there, teme?" Snarked Naruto once he saw Sasuke burried deep into the ground, only the head protruding.

"At least no pedophile shoved anything of his up my ass, dobe." Was the expected snark back and Naruto chuckled, shrugging his shoulders.

"Touche I guess. So, what are we gonna do?"

"Isn't it obvious? I'm getting out of this hole and then going after Kakashi-sensei. I touched the bells before, this time I'm getting them."

Even against his will Naruto whistled; that was pretty impressive, he didn't even get close to them before. "Maaan, wish I could say the same, but you saw how I got my ass kicked. But, way I see it, it's gonna take you too long to get out of there and time's running out already. I could get you out a bit faster, since, you know, I can actually move," he poked fun at the Uchiha. "but then you'd help me back. I can't get the bell, and now that he knows how good you are, he won't be surprised as easy. Only choice is to surprise him again, but without getting surprised ourselves. Only way to do that is by cooperating. You know, divide and conquer and all that crap, never too good with it." Naruto shrugged.

Sasuke was surprised. Was that really the dead last? Was that a genjutsu or something because Naruto sounded like he had a lot of common sense right then. And common sense was rather uncommon lately.

But the blonde was right, he needed help and it was true that he had surprised his teacher. Now that the jounin knew how good he really was, he wouldn't even let him get close.

"How do you know I won't cheat you out of your bell?" He asked, though mostly to check Naruto's reply.

All that he got was a chuckle and Naruto's helping hand. "You may be a teme, but you got honor, I know you do, you know you do. Besides, what would you do with an extra bell, give it to Sakura? No way, she's even weaker than me and you can't handle weakness. You're allergic to it."

A grunt later, both from the exertion of getting out of the damn hole and from acquiescing to Naruto's words and Sasuke sighed. Better Naruto than Sakura; even he was less likely to draw enemy attention, and that was considering his loud personality and orange colors.

Speaking of loud personality,the blonde wasn't anywhere near as loud, obnoxious or arrogant as he was the month prior (and calling someone arrogant was a high insult if it came from Sasuke). In fact, even his clothing seemed to be subdued a bit,what the hell had happened?

'Rules of Shinobi Conduct', 'Stealth Guide' and 'Tactical Stratagem Guide' had happened. Good books those ones. Naruto had stumbled across them (read; the librarian snuck them into his reading table) and read them for fun.

If people didn't look at him with his orange ensemble (whoah, nice word that, he noted), then he'd make them notice him with his 'kick-ass skills'! Which meant getting these skills in the first place.

First you get the skillz, then you get the recognition, then... then you get the HAT!

Or something like that.

But for now, he had something else to focus on.

"So, any other bright ideas, dobe? He's a jounin, he'll see us coming a forest away."

Naruto grinned a grin that was entirely too much like his 'pranking planning mode' for Sasuke to be entirely comfortable with. "Well, what if an entire forest is in his face? Leave cover to me, just focus on getting the bells. I'll be busy though, to keep the cover up, so I'll only be able to supply a few clones, that alright with you? I can still change them into things, like kunai or shuriken, that you can throw and catch him by surprise."

"Hnnn... That might work, he wouldn't expect a shuriken to change to a human, should get him by surprise. But what's our cover?"

"Weeell... you know what I said yesterday about 'making jutsu' is my hobby? Let's just say I took 'leaf-style shinobi' to a more... literal level!" Then he laughed, conspiratorily and evilly.

It was contagious and Sasuke grinned back. Time to get back at their damned sensei.

Kakashi got a strange feeling, like he had just been 'had', but ignored it, his read was more important than that anyway. What could a bunch of brats do to him?

"Hello Kakashi-sensei. Care for a rematch?" It was Naruto, the annoying blonde, but something was strange about him.

Oh year, he wasn't rushing like an idiot.

"Sure, Mr-dead-last. I didn't know you liked the Sennin Goroshi so much." He tried to get a reaction out of the blonde and let's say he was honestly surprised when he didn't.

He should have been worried instead.

"Oh I didn't like it, not at all you damn pedophile. I bet that's how you get your kicks, molesting young boys, what, women are actually too much for you?"

"I don't want to hear about it from a boy who hasn't even jerked off properly."

"Well, just so you know, this 'boy' is a legal adult you know. Old enough to kill, old enough to drink and... do other things as well."

Now that was cause for alarm, and surprise. Looking over at the blonde, all Kakashi got was a vicious grin. Before he could speak, the blonde continued.

"Oh, and by the way, gotcha!" He said, hands already in a weird position. Both hands were in half-ram position, but while one was placed before his chest, as is the proper place, the other one was over his head.

"Kirigakure no Jutsu? How could he-"

"Konoha Ninpou: Konohagakure no Jutsu! (Leaf Ninja Art: Hidden In The Leaves Technique)"

"W-what?" Kakashi chocked out, but there was not much else he could do as suddenly leaves from all the trees around him picked up, buffeting him forcefully.

On their own, no leaf actually hurt him, but it seemed like it was a single mass slamming on him, like a thick pea-soup. Even if he could move freely, it messed up almost all of his senses! Touch was out of the window thanks to all these leaves slamming onto him, sound was off thanks to all the leaves and sight was gone as well!

So he ran, hoping that the jutsu had a small area of effect. No such luck; it seemed to not be targeted on him either, more like emitted all around Naruto!

How much chakra did the brat have? He thought he only possessed just a bit above average, judging on how long his clones had lasted, but this was on a whole other level!

So it was very surprising when he was forced to dodge to the side to avoid a thrown kunai and then lean to the other, lest a kick caught his head.

Funny, in the short glimpses of sight the fluttering leaves allowed him, he made out a completely different kind of leg than Naruto's...

Uchiha Sasuke?

But they were supposed to be mortal enemies, they would turn into rivals only after he had worked them to the bone and bonded them through various demeaning chores!

They weren't supposed to cooperate!

And Sasuke was definitely not supposed to throw kunai quite that liberally either!

Something was wrong and Kakashi wasn't in on the plan. He hated when he wasn't in on the plan!

And just how was Sasuke able to find him in all this fluttering-leaf mess? Could Naruto be able to control the density of this damn jutsu of his? If so, he was either better than the files said or he had practiced for way longer than he had thought possible.

It was both, even though Kakashi himself didn't know it.

Then, he heard a weird popping sound, his trained ears managed to distinguish it as a cancelled Henge, even with all this mess around him.

Kakashi had only one moment to curse his luck and still-virgin life before being swarmed by clones he never even knew existed.

Half an hour later, the prospective Team7 was back at the three stumps that served as their meeting point. Kakashi had made to tie up Sakura, since she hadn't gotten a bell, but Naruto emphatically refused.

More like threw in several remarks on bondage, pedophilia and whipped cream, but he got the point across. Or rather, Sakura got her slap across Kakashi's face.

Really, no child should read 'Sexual Remarks; Make or Break Relationships and Enemies!'...

"So, to recap. Sakura you were useless. Naruto you were less than useless. Sasuke you managed to do something, just a bit above useless. But somehow," He wasn't about to reveal that Naruto's remarks had managed their goal of ruining his calm and unsettling him. "You two managed to pass. So, what am I gonna do with you?" He sighed. "You two made a good enough plan, but you completely forgot Sakura. And Sakura, you did nothing to help Naruto while he fought near you, instead you just ran off to Sasuke..."

"But, but, Sakura-chan knew I would most likely fail to get a bell, so she bid her time, she saw your strategy and probably thought of a plan to share with Sasuke, right Sakura-chan?" Naruto exclaimed, throwing a sharp glance at the girl to let her know of his plan. "They're the top two of the class, they knew nothing about my brand-new Konohagakure no Jutsu. So, you can't blame her for it!"

"Y-yeah, Naruto's right! I didn't know anything about it!" She followed up close, regardless of the blonde idiot's plan, it would be better than being called a traitor, she thought.

"Besides, as for me and Sasuke excluding Sakura-chan, well, she's more a support type ninja right? I bet she's gonna be great with traps and such, but we needed combat. If she was included, you could have used her as a hostage and that would be bad, right?"

"Is that so?" Glared Kakashi. He knew the blonde was lieing, but why was he? The same thing passed Sasuke's mind. "Alright then, I'll be back after you eat your lunch, but don't share any with Sakura or you will fail instantly!"

Then he was gone.

Naruto had but a second to sigh in relief before being picked up by the scruff by an annoyed Sasuke. "You dobe!" He shouted. "What were you thinking? Why are you including her? Want him to fail us? I agreed to your plan because it would give me a better partner than her" He spat. "but what you're doing will get us failed!"

Sasuke's tirade came less from the potential of failure however, and more from the feeling of betrayal.

"No it won't Sasuke. How do you think I learned to do jutsu, try every handseal combination and hope for the best? Come on, I'm not that stupid! I went to the Library, darned place that it is. But you see, I found some nice books there, tactics and such. One of them said that 'excluding special circumstances, no Konoha cell functions with less than four members; a leader and three subordinates.' In short, Kakashi is our leader and he needs three partners. The plan was us two getting the bells, but if we completely cut off Sakura-chan, we'd fail. It's true that Sakura-chan's weak in battle, but I'm sure that she's gonna make an excellent support, know what I mean? Even the Sannin had three members and one of them was a medic-nin! Not all battles are won with fireballs, Sasuke, or nobody will be there to patch you up after!"

"Ugh, whatever. Don't think I've forgiven you for lieing to me though." Still the raven let the blonde go and turned around to huff. Naruto was right, Sasuke knew as much, but that didn't make it any easier to swallow.

"Oh, come on, Sasuke-teme, we need Sakura-chan to pass the test!"

Meanwhile poor Sakura stood dumbstruck, mostly because the ropes kept her from falling to her knees. Sasuke-kun thought she was worthless? He didn't want her on his team? He'd rather have Naruto than her? Who-what-why?

Tears began streaking down her face and she sobbed quietly while Naruto tried to salvage the team.

"Anyway, Sasuke, you can't always get what you want. Hell, I'd rather have been in Hinata's team than with you or Sakura, she and Shino dislike me much less than either of you, but here I am. For now, we have to cooperate, or Kakashi-sensei will rip us apart next round. Dunno about you, but I'm not failing. Look, all I want to say is, well, is it that bad to work together? You saw what we did, we took down a jounin. I mean, if instead of taking bells we had attacked with a kunai? Think about it man, us, two newly-minted gennin, managed to beat a freaking jounin! If that doesn't mean that teamwork's important, then I don't know what is."

"Yeah, but you still lied to me!" Sasuke countered, forcing Naruto to sigh. Ever since Itachi's betrayal, the raven had had a serious problem with liars.

"No, I said we should exclude Sakura-chan from that fight. After that, we had to include her because that's what Kakashi-sensei wanted to hear. I didn't lie to you; I tricked you. Come on man, forgive me alright? Now we got a second chance to do this, right this time! And since Sakura-chan knows I'm not as pathetic as I used to be any more, maybe this time she can help us. Besides, don't you get it? There has to be the three of us that pass; the bells are just a distraction!"

"Ugh... When did you get all that smart anyway, dobe..." It wasn't a question per se, but Naruto answered it with the saddest, loneliest look one could imagine in his eyes.

"Since I actually sat down and read something. Nobody ever taught me anything really, you know..."

Even Sasuke's grunt seemed to stutter for a second as he realized that Naruto never had a family to begin with, but Sasuke got over it quickly enough; they had both gotten over their respective lots in life, at least in part. For now, something else beckoned. "H-Hnnn... Fine, we'll cooperate, but I'll still be watching you, Uzumaki. You might have had reason to trick me, but I still don't like it. So Sakura, any ideas? Hey, Sakura! Why's she crying?"

He called her name twice because the pink-haired girl seemed to stare into infinity, her mind unable to cope with the stress of rejection. In all her time knowing Sasuke, she had never once thought possible that he didn't like her, that he didn't believe in her at all, that he didn't want her near him even more than Naruto. That he hated her. For 'her' Sasuke to reject her so completely, the little girl's world seemed to collapse. Her tears had stopped coming out, instead she dry heaved and chocked on her own.

"Sasuke, you're even more of an inconsiderate, anti-social idiot than me, and that's saying a lot." Naruto sighed and got a small napkin off from his bento box, cleaning up an unresponsive Sakura's face. "Come on Sakura-chan, the teme didn't mean it like that, he was probably just pissed off at me and lashed out everywhere around him." He tried to soothe the girl. "Besides, you're the smartest of us three right? So, right now, we need you, because there's no way we're getting Kakakashi caught by surprise again. We need a new plan and only you can give us one." A not-so-subtle and neither 'gentle' elbow burried itself into Sasuke's ribs, forcing the boy to speak up.

"Ugh, yeah, whatever, sorry, we need you."

It was like life seeped back into Sakura, after Sasuke said 'sorry' and that he 'needed her'. Then that meant he didn't hate her, he didn't reject her! That meant she could help him, she had to help him! Hope shone almost like stars from her eyes and it was all Sasuke could do not to step back and away from her. And that was only because she was tied up securely.

"A'right! Meetin' time!" Declared Naruto as he opened both bento boxes between the three and cut Sakura's ropes.

He hadn't had time to do anything more as Kakashi appeared, lightning flashing in the background and an unearthly wind blowing.

It would be so cool if it wasn't so scary!

An hour later, and a confirmed success on finally becoming a team after a tear-inducing speech about their budding teamwork, Naruto sat on a stone, getting interrogated by Kakashi, and Sasuke of course.

"Now, my cute little gennin, how did you get a technique like the Konohagakure, or whatever you called it?"

Naruto sighed, he knew it was coming. "Well... you know how everybody, except Sakura-chan, belongs to a clan right? And Sakura-chan is waaay smarter than me. What do I have? I have nothing, well, got my Kage Bunshin a month or so ago, but that was a fluke gone right, really. And I still can't do the regular bunshin, Iruka-sensei says I use too much chakra and blow it up. So, I thought, if I can't use an already existing jutsu, I'd have to make my own. Besides, I plan to start an Uzumaki clan someday and that means leaving behind family jutsu!"

Uzumaki clan? Kakashi had a veeery bad feeling about this.

"I mean, there was one Uzumaki clan before, but they died and jii-san said I got their name in honor of one of them, like an adopted child or something. I'm still no less of an orphan though, but I have a name to live up to at least. Since I have no idea what the original Uzumaki were all about, I have to make do with my ideas, you know? So I went to the Library, I mean, how did our techniques get made anyway? Somebody had to make them, maybe I could make my own, right? So I found this great book and started reading. I decided to start small, don't wanna blow myself up with a Katon or something, that's teme's line of work." A glare and a grunt came Naruto's way and he chuckled. "So anyway, I thought, what theme should my jutsu have? Like what should it be? All the elements and such are overused, I'm no good at Genjutsu, know nothing of Taijutsu or Fuinjutsu and Iryo-jutsu need waaaay too much studying, not my style."

He took a breath as he picked up a small tree's leaf and made it hover and spin over his palm. "So, I took 'leaf-style shinobi' to a new level. Called myself that the day Mizuki... Well, Mizuke went rogue and I had to fight him with Iruka-sensei. He asked me who I was and I said I was 'Leaf-Style shinobi Uzumaki Naruto-dattebayo!'" He even added his original catchphrase. "So, I took it to another level, I mean, if you can use water and earth, why not leaves? And we're in a forest and there's lots of forests all around! Using a medium for my jutsu means I need less control, so it's easier for me to learn. So, anyway, I took the book and some others I'd found," Though, he really stole it from the Library, he just didn't know he had to register it first. "and went out to practice. Turns out I have this weird 'wind affinity' thing. Makes it easier to use fuuton, though I can't find any around, so it's not like I can learn any. But at least, it makes it easier for me to mix my chakra with wind and spin it around. So I use that to make my Konohagakure no Jutsu. I guess it could work with sand or even a bit of water to make a Sunagakure or Suigakure no Jutsu, but I haven't seen any of that around so I don't know..."

While Naruto took a breath from his rant, Kakashi, Sakura and Sasuke gaped. Well, Kakashi more than the others because the brat had just managed to find out the trick behind the Mizugakure no Jutsu, one of Mist's hidden techniques!

What the hell, when did the brat turn into a genius anyway?

Then, he remembered who the child's parents were; from the moment he was born...

"W-Wow..." Stuttered Sakura, without wanting to. She was officially impressed.

"H-Hnnn" So was Sasuke, but anything more would be way too expressive for him.

"So, any more ideas you have Naruto?" Came Kakashi's happy responce, making the other two gennin stare at him. "What? It was a nice idea, right?"

Naruto nodded happily. "Well, of course I do! I mean, wind chakra's good for cutting stuff right? So what if I could make leaves into shuriken? I can already make them somewhat stiff and resistant to damage, but I can't make them into blades yet. I also want to reduce my Konohagakure no Jutsu, I mean, it takes out a lot of chakra to use, so it's probably way too much for anyone else. Maybe I need to add a handseal or something. And then..." Now his grin was evil. "Then I have my ougi! And that's a secret!"

"Baka, samurai use ougi..." Grunted Sasuke, getting nods from Sakura. "Ninja have hissatsu waza." Now poor Sakura was torn between sweat-dropping and face-faulting, but she chose gape.

Kakashi instead chuckled, these brats could be fun after all.

Chapter 3: Saisho no Hana Saku (First Bloom)

As days passed and Team Seven performed more and more missions, though to their chagrin none of them were more than a glorified chore, all members save Naruto noticed something strange about the blonde.

No, it wasn't how he didn't act like a complete retard, or that he had gotten over his crush on Sakura (which he hadn't, he was simply too deep into thinking about his jutsu to really think about her).

It was how quick he was at growing stronger and stronger.

It was as if every day he became visibly more skilled.

Normally, that would delight a teacher, especially one as bored and inactive as Kakashi. After all, if his student grew so fast on his own, that left more time for Icha Icha, right?

But Naruto was anything but normal.

He had been worse than an idiot, he had been the most retarded student in the whole damn Academy! And now you expect Kakashi to not be worried when the boy suddenly seemed to gain insight and power that he shouldn't have?

Preposterous! He cared for each and every one of his students! He knew everything there was to know about them!

Well, not really, he knew far less than he'd like to admit, but he still cared for his brats. They were his brats. Until they made Chuunin anyway, where he could just dump them to someone else or something.

Icha Icha comes first. Always.

Still, it was worrying for the Copy Ninja, and the rest of the team as well. Even though Sasuke would never admit it, he was curious, and so was Sakura. The latter was more along the lines of annoyance, since she kind of missed the old Naruto (and his constant work at keeping her happy), but let's just say she cared. In some convoluted, incomprehensible way that tsundere girls do.

Kakashi was more worried about the source of the intellect. Or more like how furry that source was.

Could it be the Kyuubi? Could the demon have broken free? Could it be twisting the boy into an omnicidal maniac with a fetish for slaughter?

All joking aside, he was worried. So, he did the logical thing…

No, not stalk, who stalks people anyway (far away, one certain Hyuuga sneezed and promptly fainted from embarassement)? No, he acted like a logical adult (one of the few times so far in his life) and decided to ask Naruto.

"Say, Naruto… You've been improving rather fast lately. Care to share the secret to success?" He asked kindly, or as kindly as a man can ask with seventy-five percent of their face covered.

"Uhh… I guess I shower lots?" Cue blinking. "No wait, that's the other line, I guess it's 'cause I like, work out a lot and then eat a lot and then sleep and then work out a lot. I do this all day, so it's really good for me."

Kakashi sighed and sat down next to the boy. It wasn't about physical growth he was worried, anybody could work on that, it was the mental growth he cared for. "Not that. I mean, you are smarter now, you don't shout as much and you actually make sense. It's not a bad thing, I'm just curious, that's all."

"Well, I don't shout that much 'cause my head hurts most of the time from the training, if I shouted as well, it would be killing me, sensei. But, I guess it's because I started reading for a change. Hell, I'm still reading right now."

Kakashi, and the other two members of the team, blinked. "Naruto, you're not reading right now. You don't have a book in front of you to read from." He drawled out slowly, trying to make sense of the blonde.

"Sure I am! Wait, no, I'm not. Well, I am, but it's not I, it's me and… well…" He stopped ranting and took a look at Sakura's face, she was almost the most expressive of them, seeing as how she lacked a stick up her bum and had more than fifty-percent of her face revealed. "You think I'm crazy, right? Well, I'm not! I'm not crazy! I really am reading! It's about the Second Hokage and various fungi indigenous in Rai no Kuni!" He shouted, getting up suddenly and almost sending Kakashi rolling away.

"What does the Hokage have to do with fungi?" Sakura's question came, along with a 'I think you should see the nice people in the white coats' look.

One has to wonder how so many words can be transferred with a look and why language was made if looks could say so much, but I digress.

"It doesn't. They are completely unrelated. If it was the First Hokage, I'd wonder, but the second had nothing to do with it, he never even went in Rai no Kuni!" Naruto kept on going crazy. "Don't you see?" There was a frantic look in his eyes now and Kakashi was slowly, calmly moving closer to the blonde. The boy needed help…

"Easy Naruto, calm down and talk about it calmly. I'm sure we can all resolve it peacefully…" Well, even Kakashi had learned a bit of psychology.

"Calmly? CALMLY? You think I'm crazy! You all think I'm crazy don't you?" Naruto backed away. "But you are the crazy ones! Who the hell reads about the Second Hokage and various fungi indigenous in Rai no Kuni anyway?"

Sasuke decided to end this with his characteristic, one-word way. "You."

"What? No! They are completely unrelated things! I'm reading on the Second Hokage and on various fungi, but it's not I who's reading!"

At that moment, Kakashi wondered if Naruto had taken a 'hands on' attempt to research mushrooms and ate a few of them. Pretty-pretty colors and all that nice things.

Giggle. No bad Kakashi, think about the wonders of psychotropic flora while in huge orgies another time! Your student needs you!

"Naruto… How can you be reading books when you don't have one on you?" He tried to bring the discussion back to normalcy.

"I can't, of course. How could I?" Naruto deadpanned. "But I'm not reading, me is, or was. Guess me ran out of chakra and popped. Damn, wanted to know what happened next…"

Wheels began to turn in Kakashi's mind as he took in that last sentence. "Naruto… who exactly is the I that was studying?"

"Eh? A Kage Bunshin of mine, what, who did you think it was? It's just so confusing to name them so I just call them 'Me'. Do you know how hard it is to name one thousand 'yous' every time you summon? One name is enough."

The crow that flew over the stunned team sounded awfully like cawing 'Idiot, idiot', but Kakashi tried to ignore it in favour of sighing.

"Oh, you were using the Kage Bunshin's secret, the ability to transfer memories when the clone dispels… I was worried there for a second. Still, how did you realize it so early? It usually takes much longer to find that little trick…" It was a legitimate question. Mostly due to the fact that it took Kakashi several months to realize it, how could an idiot find it out in less than sixty days?

Instead of an answer however, Kakashi was presented with a nasty, dirty glare.

"You… kicked me in the 'gnads." Naruto stated, hostility evident in his voice. "Even though I never attacked you personally, in the test, you kicked a clone in the 'gnads. It was kind of hard to miss that particular memory Kakashi-sensei…"

Feeling the sweat-drop growing on his head, Kakashi decided to let the matter drop, he didn't want to be pranked any time soon, if ever. "A-ah… I see… Well, I'm really sorry…"

"If you're sorry about it then do something!" Naruto yelled suddenly, giving the clear image of him being bipolar. "As penance for giving me phantom pains for a week,… YOU BETTER TEACH ME SOMETHIN'! Got it?"

Naruto wasn't considered Konoha's most unpredictable shinobi for nothing; he's the only gennin that would threaten a jounin… without any substantial blackmail material to boot either!

Still, his declaration had the wanted effect of appearing so hilarious that it brought the entire team (sans a confused Naruto) to laughter.

"Oi, why are you laughing? Oi!" He tried to get it but… Smarter he might have become, but also he had become more insane.

But that did not prevent him from working on his new 'leaf jutsu', maybe he should call it 'haton (leaf release)' instead of Konoha Ninpo? Would certain types of leaves work better? Maybe if he could infuse leaves with his chakra, in a raw form, and then withdraw it or shape it after? Then again, he had so much chakra it would be pointless to do so.

So, for now, he worked on making his Konohagakure smaller so he could control it easier. Wouldn't do to blind his team while trying to do it to his enemy, right? But for now… "Hey, Kakashi-sensei, I saw you Kawarimi at the test when Sasuke threw some kunai at you, but you didn't use any handseals! How did you do it?" It was a necessary part for his new technique, or collaboration jutsu as it were.

"Hm? Oh that, it's simple really. Once you use a technique enough, you can start removing handseals from it until you don't need them anymore. Don't expect to do it any time soon, you'd have to do it hundreds of times." Kakashi tried to squash Naruto's hopes.

It didn't work; the blonde just grinned and thanked his sensei, his crazy mind already working on iy. Hundreds of times? No problem; he was hundreds of people!

"Speaking of Naruto… how did you know where I was in that mess, Sasuke?" Asked Kakashi, he was still curious.

The raven-haired boy nodded grimly. "Seems the dobe has better control than we thought; he made them converge on you mostly. Not to say it was much better for me, but you looked like they had completely covered you…"

While Kakashi hummed, Naruto instead had his eyes glaze. Covered by leaves, sticking on him… Stiff leaves, hard as leather or almost steel, an armor that wouldn't be near as cumbersome since he could control it with his chakra.

A small, giggle-like chuckle escaped his lips.

JUTSU WERE AWESOME! More! More jutsu! More ideas hopping around in his head like rabbits on speed!

It was safe to say that every member of Team Seven wisely backed away from the less-than-sane blonde.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Several dozen clones appeared, once again astounding poor Kakashi with the amount of chakra the boy had, before running off, identical crazed smiles on their faces.

Admittedly, seeing so many crazed blondes running with a purpose towards some unknown objective… It made most of Konoha write their last wills; the boy had finally snapped!

But the truth was that he was sane, for the most part anyway. Simply, he had more and more ideas on how to use leaves.

Still, he had to finish his early projects first. Amusingly enough, his ougi (he still refused to go by Sasuke's suggestion of hissatsu waza) would probably be harder to make, if much harder to actually execute.

Which meant he had to use the Kawarimi no Jutsu thousands of times first to cut off the handseals required for its use. And then he'd have to do the same with his Konohagakure. Of course, the second jutsu was more in order to master his ougi, rather than to create it in the first place, but still it was a necessary part.

Back in his home, another clone read a book on wind manipulation. Having swiped it from a retired chuunin's garbage bin, he was deep into it. After all, he had found out that he had a wind affinity, which made Konohagakure no Jutsu possible to make in the first place, but he still had to get better if he wanted to perform the rest of his techniques.

"Wind is an element that is all around us, we breathe it with every breath we take, we feel it on our skin and we need it for our very survival. However, wind-users, not merely those knowing wind jutsu, but those who can use it freely, are by far the rarest in the shinobi community. They are at their most common in Kaze no Kuni, but even there they are few compared to Katon users."

"Many have speculated why that is so, why it is that an element so common and so in touch with everything is so hard to manipulate. Could it be some countermeasure to its great power? Could it be that we lack understanding of that force?"

"No. It is neither. The reason stems from the physicality and yet ethereal nature of wind. Despite it having a physical representation, it is still treated as an energy much like fire or lightning. It is this dual nature that makes it so hard to understand and use."

"As a widely accepted belief, the first step to learning to use wind chakra is to try to cut a leaf in half. However, that is merely a primer on its combat uses, a 'quick and dirty' way to quickly learn to use wind chakra for combat. True wind manipulation on the other hand uses the power of the wind for more things."

"As every element has its niche, something that it is inherently good at, Wind's most common ability is 'cutting'. It is easy to create and launch a blade of wind, an invisible edge that cuts through all in its path, be it wood, stone or steel. One can easily reinforce a weapon with wind chakra, making them much sharper and increasing the cutting edge, more experienced ninja can cut an enemy several feet away. However, it need not be a solid blade, once a certain level of mastery is reached, one can create a 'vacuum', a place with no wind pressure that, for lack of better words, 'implodes' the target area outwards."

"However, that is not all the wind can do. With proper manipulation, one can enhance their speed, reduce falling speed, even deflect incoming projectiles and techniques."

"It is due to the constant presence and flexibility of wind that its handseal is called 'Dragon', the ever-present force. It also signifies the wisdom needed to wield the element as even a small miscalculation, especially in new jutsu, can damage the user far more than the enemy."

The clone hummed as it read and re-read the passages. It had done so several times, but it couldn't help it. There was something in these lines, some hidden fact, just under the tip of its tongue that it just couldn't voice.

It felt like a large hint, a huge idea, was hitting it on the head and it just couldn't put it to words!

It was aggravating...

"Hmm... reinforce the blade... wait what?" The clone's eyes widened as it read it again and again. Could it mean that Wind-users were good for 'Reinforce' jutsu? But then, almost right above it said about launching blades and such, that's an Emit-type's signature way! "No... No way! No freaking way!" He shouted. "Wind manipulation is so hard because it's using 'Combine' type archetypes!" Then a whoop of joy as it realized he could very well be one of the few destined ones who can actually use, or better yet make, Combine type jutsu! "HELL YEAH! I'm the best dattebayo!"

But for now he had more work to do, he knew what its Boss would want; learn how to use wind chakra!

"Aside from the method noted previously on quickly learning how to use wind chakra for cutting, there are several other excercises to be used for budding Wind masters, those that actually want to use their element to the fullest. The first exercise is melding chakra into the air to feel the various currents and how they change. In actuality, this exercise has no ending, it serves to better understand the ever-changing element of wind. The next exercise is to take small, light items and levitate them off your palm, leaves are the best for beginners. Once it feels comfortable to do so, the aspiring wind user may try to use other parts of the body to levitate leaves from, or levitate multiple items at the same time. The third exercise is cutting a leaf in half is the last exercise, even though it becomes usable in jutsu easier than the others. The last once is taking a small amount of water and lifting up small drops of it by sucking away the air above the liquid's surface."

" These techniques teach how to feel the wind, create pressure, create blades and create vacuums in order. Further exercises and techniques involve combining these aforementioned four and increasing their magnitude, though individual villages may possess secret training techniques not easily available. To access those, a master would be needed, this world's most valuable resource."

"Levitate a leaf huh..." Naruto hummed as he took a small leaf and placed it on his palm. That would be awesome since it would train him to use less chakra with his Konohagakure, maybe even figure out what seals to add to the sequence so it can be easily usable by other Konoha ninja.

Then his ingenious/insane mind had another idea; leaves that could levitate... on their own! Maybe he could make them stay there, in the air, without any chakra spending after using the technique. If he could do that, then he could almost walk on air! It would be awesome!

Of course, that would require extensive planning, maybe even a meld with fuinjutsu, since he would need to 'seal' his chakra into the leaf to sustain the levitation.

Hmmm...

Fuinjutsu...

Ideas, ideas everywhere, raise your voices into the air! Shout them out, make a clatter, fill this mind with endless rattle!

The ensuing 'evil' laugh that issued from the 'Demon's House' was foreboding enough that no civilian would approach it for months.

And so it was that Naruto began unleashing clone after clone in an effort to put his ideas to practice. Of course, he knew he couldn't do everything that came to mind, even he couldn't do that. Instead, he used his clones to write down the best ideas and slowly work them out. So, while some clones worked on wind-chakra control, the better to understand which hand seals they should add to Konohagakure, some of them would break off from the others when inspiration struck, write down their ideas, practice them until they could no longer and, if they had more time left, go back to their original training.

Because making techniques required a great amount of understanding, it also meant learning a lot, which in turn forced Naruto to study even more than he had originally planned. He hadn't started on Fuinjutsu, he thought he should start with at least some Konoha Ninpou jutsu, jutsu that would define him and his style before branching out. He was good with multitasking, Kage Bunshin's the ultimate tool for that, but even he had his limits. Or more like, if he learned things that were too diverse from each other, it gave him headaches that made the worse migrane seem like a pleasant lullaby, not to mention possibly also damage his brain. And considering the brain was a necessary part of jutsu making, not to mention living, he was quite keen on keeping it healthy and happy.

So, for now he was content with his 'Haton' or 'Konoha Ninpo', he still wasn't sure what he should name them.

Still, at the end of the day, all this reading did Naruto a lot of good. It didn't smarten him up, but it did mellow him out, it gave him a way to use his common sense and the street smarts he had gained in his short life as a vagrant

Sasuke actually looked at him as if he were more than an insect under the mud under the sole of his sandals.

Sakura-chan still didn't like him much, but at least she tolerated him. That had to mean something, right? Unfortunately for the blonde, it was much less than he hoped it did.

As for Kakashi? The jounin kept getting more and more impressed every day. The gaki might have the most insane ideas, but somehow he still managed to play them just right to make them work.

Which is why Kakashi had them do several D-rank missions every day now, so he could take his brats out for a C-rank early on. Something simple, like taking an item to a village within a time-limit. Nothing much but just enough to let them know of the world beyond the Gates. Who knows, it may even give the brat some more ideas. Granted most of them were insane and impractical, but skills like the Konohagakure were... they were pure gold at the hands of someone who can use them properly.

So, it is obvious that Kakashi's surprise was great when Naruto called him over while on the job, bouncing up-and-down excitedly.

"Kakashi-sensei!Kakashi-sensei! I made a new jutsu! Look, look, look!" He said and showed a leaf floating above his hand.

"You... made a leaf float?" Kakashi deadpanned. He expected more than just a floating leaf but... but... wait, what? There was a distortion on the wind around the leaf? He was lucky he could pick that little detail out, probably because he had something stable to compare it to... "Naruto, what's that technique?" He asked, curious this time.

"Well, well, sometimes, you just run out of shuriken right, or you don't have time to pick them up or something! Or you just want to surprise someone, right? So, I made this! Konoha Ninpo: Konoha Shuriken! I put in my chakra to make it reaaally stiff and then some wind-chakra to give it an edge! Watch this!" Right after, the excited blonde threw the leaf at a tree.

Or rather three inches into the tree.

Kakashi gaped. Imagine an enemy knocking you to the ground. You cower and scramble for help, inconspicuously clawing around for traction. Then you pick up a leaf. As the enemy readies to deliver the final blow... you throw the leaf, straight into their throat! Or any other vital spot for that matter! Instant surprise-counter-killer move!

"Well done Naruto! That's a useful little jutsu, if you can surprise your enemy. Of course, after the first time it's used, no one is going to fall for it of course, but it could help."

Naruto nodded semi-sadly. "I know, but it isn't ready yet..." At Kakashi's inquisitive look, Naruto rubbed the back of his head. "Well, more like, I originally wanted to throw the leaves as well, with my chakra I mean, but I just can't get it right yet. Maybe I need more training, dunno. But I was really thinking about the name, something like 'Konoha Ninpo: Ha-dan (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Bullet/Shot)' or something like that... Seems I have to train more..."

Chuckling uncomfortably was all Kakashi could do. It seemed one of the world's most innocent items would soon become something fearsome.

_  
><strong>AN: Next chapter's out, enjoy while it's still hot! Next chapter, we are revealing Naruto's Hissatsu Waza/Ougi/Bank- err, scratch that last one.**

**Yeah, well, anyway, this fic's light hearted and fun so it's easier to write, but it's not going to be more than that. Of course, if anyone wants to take these jutsu, go right ahead. Just send a PM and I'll send you all the jutsu I've made.**

**Remember; a review is more important to an author than ten or twenty fav's or alerts! So don't hesitate to review!**

**Oh, and since I forgot, I guess I have to present the jutsu used so far, right? Here we go:**

**Konoha Ninpo: Konohagakure no Jutsu (Leaf Ninja Art: Hidden In The Leaves Technique)**  
><strong>Cost: C, Control: C, Rank: C<strong>  
><strong>The Konohagakure no Jutsu picks up surrounding leaves and spins them violently around the target, making it very hard to see in an area surrounding him. Said area is dependant on the chakra used. In comparison to the Mizugakure no Jutsu, the Konohagakure can be at times more powerful and less powerful. Not only does it depend on an external medium (while the Mizugakure requires far less, even in water quantities, a large bottle is usually enough) but also it doesn't conceal as completely. However, unlike the Mizugakure, it ruins more than just the sense of sight, but also the sense of touch and the sense of hearing. Leaves used with the Konohagakure no Jutsu are not ruined and may be used with another technique.<strong>

**Konoha Ninpo: Konoha Shuriken (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Shuriken)**  
><strong>Cost: D, Control: D, Rank: D<strong>  
><strong>One of the easiest Konoha Ninpo possible, however it still requires training with wind chakra to eschew more than a handseal (the others are used to create the wind currents that give the leaves their edge, removing them would make the jutsu pointless). By imbuing one or more leaves with wind chakra to create a wind blade around them and then reinforcing them wtih normal chakra to ensure they will fly as expected and withstand initial impact, the user throws innocent-looking leaves that can actually cut better than shuriken. As a technique it is mostly dependant on the user's skill with shuriken, but it can definitely surprise an enemy. Beyond that, it is mostly used as training to learn how Konoha Ninpo are used. Leaves used this way may or may not be destroyed depending on opposition and supplied chakra. At any rate, the jutsu burns itself out in seconds, so even if they survive, the technique would need to be cast again before throwing them once more.<strong>

**Konoha Ninpo: Ha-dan (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Bullet/Shot)**  
><strong>Cost: D, Control C, Rank C<strong>  
><strong>The improved form of Konoha Shuriken, it is only slightly harder than the original when used with the handseals necessary, but quite a bit harder when used without. The user not only reinforces the leaf's hardness and grants it a wind blade around it, but also creates a small explosive core of wind between the leaf and his hand (or from wherever he chooses to launch them). As a result, the leaves gain superior velocity and speed, allowing them to travel much further than the previous technique. Thanks to the increased range and very little sound (most of it negated by the wind around the leaf), it can even double as a sniping jutsu.<strong>

**Question: Haton (Leaf Release) or Konoha Ninpo (Leaf Ninja Art)? Either way works with me, just having entirely too much fun messing around with one of the world's most innocent items turned into leathal weapons.**

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter 3: Saisho no Hana Saku (First Bloom)_

As days passed and Team Seven performed more and more missions, though to their chagrin none of them were more than a glorified chore, all members save Naruto noticed something strange about the blonde.

No, it wasn't how he didn't act like a complete retard, or that he had gotten over his crush on Sakura (which he hadn't, he was simply too deep into thinking about his jutsu to really think about her).

It was how _quick_ he was at growing stronger and stronger.

It was as if every day he became visibly more skilled.

Normally, that would delight a teacher, especially one as bored and inactive as Kakashi. After all, if his student grew so fast on his own, that left more time for Icha Icha, right?

But Naruto was anything _but_ normal.

He had been worse than an idiot, he had been the most retarded student in the whole damn Academy! And now you expect Kakashi to not be worried when the boy suddenly seemed to gain insight and power that he shouldn't have?

Preposterous! He cared for each and every one of his students! He knew everything there was to know about them!

Well, not really, he knew far less than he'd like to admit, but he still cared for his brats. They were _his brats_. Until they made Chuunin anyway, where he could just dump them to someone else or something.

Icha Icha comes first. Always.

Still, it was worrying for the Copy Ninja, and the rest of the team as well. Even though Sasuke would never admit it, he was curious, and so was Sakura. The latter was more along the lines of annoyance, since she kind of missed the old Naruto (and his constant work at keeping her happy), but let's just say she cared. In some convoluted, incomprehensible way that tsundere girls do.

Kakashi was more worried about the source of the intellect. Or more like how furry that source was.

Could it be the Kyuubi? Could the demon have broken free? Could it be twisting the boy into an omnicidal maniac with a fetish for slaughter?

All joking aside, he was worried. So, he did the logical thing…

No, not stalk, who stalks people anyway (far away, one certain Hyuuga sneezed and promptly fainted from embarassement)? No, he acted like a logical adult (one of the few times so far in his life) and decided to ask Naruto.

"Say, Naruto… You've been improving rather fast lately. Care to share the secret to success?" He asked kindly, or as kindly as a man can ask with seventy-five percent of their face covered.

"Uhh… I guess I shower lots?" Cue blinking. "No wait, that's the other line, I guess it's 'cause I like, work out a lot and then eat a lot and then sleep and then work out a lot. I do this all day, so it's really good for me."

Kakashi sighed and sat down next to the boy. It wasn't about physical growth he was worried, anybody could work on that, it was the _mental_ growth he cared for. "Not that. I mean, you are smarter now, you don't shout as much and you actually _make sense_. It's not a bad thing, I'm just curious, that's all."

"Well, I don't shout that much 'cause my head hurts most of the time from the training, if I shouted as well, it would be _killing_ me, sensei. But, I guess it's because I started reading for a change. Hell, I'm _still_ reading right now."

Kakashi, and the other two members of the team, blinked. "Naruto, you're not reading right now. You don't have a book in front of you to read from." He drawled out slowly, trying to make sense of the blonde.

"Sure I am! Wait, no, I'm not. Well, I _am_, but it's not _I_, it's _me_ and… well…" He stopped ranting and took a look at Sakura's face, she was almost the most expressive of them, seeing as how she lacked a stick up her bum and had more than fifty-percent of her face revealed. "You think I'm crazy, right? Well, I'm not! I'm not crazy! I really _am_ reading! It's about the Second Hokage and various fungi indigenous in Rai no Kuni!" He shouted, getting up suddenly and almost sending Kakashi rolling away.

"What does the Hokage have to do with fungi?" Sakura's question came, along with a 'I think you should see the nice people in the white coats' look.

One has to wonder how so many words can be transferred with a look and why language was made if looks could say so much, but I digress.

"It doesn't. They are completely unrelated. If it was the First Hokage, I'd wonder, but the second had nothing to do with it, he never even _went_ in Rai no Kuni!" Naruto kept on going crazy. "Don't you see?" There was a frantic look in his eyes now and Kakashi was slowly, calmly moving closer to the blonde. The boy needed help…

"Easy Naruto, calm down and talk about it calmly. I'm sure we can all resolve it peacefully…" Well, even Kakashi had learned a bit of psychology.

"Calmly? CALMLY? You think I'm _crazy_! You all think I'm crazy don't you?" Naruto backed away. "But _you_ are the crazy ones! Who the hell reads about the Second Hokage and various fungi indigenous in Rai no Kuni anyway?"

Sasuke decided to end this with his characteristic, one-word way. "You."

"What? No! They are completely unrelated things! I'm reading on the Second Hokage and on various fungi, but it's not _I_ who's reading!"

At that moment, Kakashi wondered if Naruto had taken a 'hands on' attempt to research mushrooms and ate a few of them. Pretty-pretty colors and all that nice things.

_Giggle._ No bad Kakashi, think about the wonders of psychotropic flora while in huge orgies another time! Your student needs you!

"Naruto… How can you be reading books when you don't have one on you?" He tried to bring the discussion back to normalcy.

"I can't, of course. How could I?" Naruto deadpanned. "But _I_'m not reading, me is, or was. Guess me ran out of chakra and popped. Damn, wanted to know what happened next…"

Wheels began to turn in Kakashi's mind as he took in that last sentence. "Naruto… who exactly is the _I_ that was studying?"

"Eh? A Kage Bunshin of mine, what, who did you think it was? It's just so confusing to name them so I just call them 'Me'. Do you know how hard it is to name one thousand 'yous' every time you summon? One name is enough."

The crow that flew over the stunned team sounded awfully like cawing 'Idiot, idiot', but Kakashi tried to ignore it in favour of sighing.

"Oh, you were using the Kage Bunshin's secret, the ability to transfer memories when the clone dispels… I was worried there for a second. Still, how did you realize it so early? It usually takes much longer to find that little trick…" It was a legitimate question. Mostly due to the fact that it took Kakashi several months to realize it, how could an idiot find it out in less than sixty days?

Instead of an answer however, Kakashi was presented with a nasty, dirty glare.

"You… kicked me in the 'gnads." Naruto stated, hostility evident in his voice. "Even though I never attacked you personally, in the test, you kicked a clone in the 'gnads. It _was_ kind of hard to miss _that_ particular memory _Kakashi-sensei_…"

Feeling the sweat-drop growing on his head, Kakashi decided to let the matter drop, he didn't want to be pranked any time soon, if ever. "A-ah… I see… Well, I'm really sorry…"

"If you're sorry about it then do something!" Naruto yelled suddenly, giving the clear image of him being bipolar. "As penance for giving me phantom pains for a week,… YOU BETTER TEACH ME SOMETHIN'! Got it?"

Naruto wasn't considered Konoha's most unpredictable shinobi for nothing; he's the only gennin that would threaten a jounin… without any substantial blackmail material to boot either!

Still, his declaration had the wanted effect of appearing so hilarious that it brought the entire team (sans a confused Naruto) to laughter.

"Oi, why are you laughing? Oi!" He tried to get it but… Smarter he might have become, but also he had become more insane.

But that did not prevent him from working on his new 'leaf jutsu', maybe he should call it 'haton (leaf release)' instead of Konoha Ninpo? Would certain types of leaves work better? Maybe if he could infuse leaves with his chakra, in a raw form, and then withdraw it or shape it after? Then again, he had so much chakra it would be pointless to do so.

So, for now, he worked on making his Konohagakure smaller so he could control it easier. Wouldn't do to blind his team while trying to do it to his enemy, right? But for now… "Hey, Kakashi-sensei, I saw you Kawarimi at the test when Sasuke threw some kunai at you, but you didn't use any handseals! How did you do it?" It was a necessary part for his new technique, or collaboration jutsu as it were.

"Hm? Oh that, it's simple really. Once you use a technique enough, you can start removing handseals from it until you don't need them anymore. Don't expect to do it any time soon, you'd have to do it hundreds of times." Kakashi tried to squash Naruto's hopes.

It didn't work; the blonde just grinned and thanked his sensei, his crazy mind already working on iy. Hundreds of times? No problem; he was _hundreds of people_!

"Speaking of Naruto… how did you know where I was in that mess, Sasuke?" Asked Kakashi, he was still curious.

The raven-haired boy nodded grimly. "Seems the dobe has better control than we thought; he made them converge on you mostly. Not to say it was much better for me, but you looked like they had completely covered you…"

While Kakashi hummed, Naruto instead had his eyes glaze. Covered by leaves, sticking on him… Stiff leaves, hard as leather or almost steel, an armor that wouldn't be near as cumbersome since he could control it with his chakra.

A small, giggle-like chuckle escaped his lips.

JUTSU WERE AWESOME! More! More jutsu! More ideas hopping around in his head like rabbits on speed!

It was safe to say that every member of Team Seven wisely backed away from the less-than-sane blonde.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Several _dozen_ clones appeared, once again astounding poor Kakashi with the amount of chakra the boy had, before running off, identical crazed smiles on their faces.

Admittedly, seeing so many crazed blondes running with a purpose towards some unknown objective… It made most of Konoha write their last wills; the boy had finally snapped!

But the truth was that he was sane, for the most part anyway. Simply, he had more and more ideas on how to use leaves.

Still, he had to finish his early projects first. Amusingly enough, his ougi (he still refused to go by Sasuke's suggestion of hissatsu waza) would probably be harder to make, if much harder to actually execute.

Which meant he had to use the Kawarimi no Jutsu thousands of times first to cut off the handseals required for its use. And then he'd have to do the same with his Konohagakure. Of course, the second jutsu was more in order to master his ougi, rather than to create it in the first place, but still it was a necessary part.

Back in his home, another clone read a book on wind manipulation. Having swiped it from a retired chuunin's garbage bin, he was deep into it. After all, he had found out that he had a wind affinity, which made Konohagakure no Jutsu possible to make in the first place, but he still had to get better if he wanted to perform the rest of his techniques.

_"Wind is an element that is all around us, we breathe it with every breath we take, we feel it on our skin and we need it for our very survival. However, wind-users, not merely those knowing wind jutsu, but those who can use it freely, are by far the rarest in the shinobi community. They are at their most common in Kaze no Kuni, but even there they are few compared to Katon users."_

_"Many have speculated why that is so, why it is that an element so common and so in touch with everything is so hard to manipulate. Could it be some countermeasure to its great power? Could it be that we lack understanding of that force?"_

_"No. It is neither. The reason stems from the physicality and yet ethereal nature of wind. Despite it having a physical representation, it is still treated as an energy much like fire or lightning. It is this dual nature that makes it so hard to understand and use."_

_"As a widely accepted belief, the first step to learning to use wind chakra is to try to cut a leaf in half. However, that is merely a primer on its combat uses, a 'quick and dirty' way to quickly learn to use wind chakra for combat. True wind manipulation on the other hand uses the power of the wind for more things."_

_"As every element has its niche, something that it is inherently good at, Wind's most common ability is 'cutting'. It is easy to create__ and launch__ a blade of wind, an invisible edge that cuts through all in its path, be it wood, stone or steel. One can easily reinforce a weapon with wind chakra, making them much sharper and increasing the cutting edge, more experienced ninja can cut an enemy several feet away. However, it need not be a solid blade, once a certain level of mastery is reached, one can create a __'vacuum'__, a place with no wind pressure that, for lack of better words, 'implodes' the target area outwards."_

_"However, that is not all the wind can do. With proper manipulation, one can enhance their speed, reduce falling speed, even deflect incoming projectiles and techniques."_

_"It is due to the constant presence and flexibility of wind that its handseal is called 'Dragon', the ever-present force. It also signifies the wisdom needed to wield the element as even a small miscalculation, especially in new jutsu, can damage the user far more than the enemy."_

The clone hummed as it read and re-read the passages. It had done so several times, but it couldn't help it. There was something in these lines, some hidden fact, just under the tip of its tongue that it just couldn't voice.

It felt like a large hint, a huge idea, was hitting it on the head and it just couldn't _put it to words_!

It was _aggravating_...

"Hmm... reinforce the blade... wait what?" The clone's eyes widened as it read it again and again. Could it mean that Wind-users were good for 'Reinforce' jutsu? But then, almost right above it said about launching blades and such, that's an Emit-type's signature way! "No... No way! No freaking way!" He shouted. "Wind manipulation is so hard because it's using _'Combine'_ type archetypes!" Then a whoop of joy as it realized he could very well be one of the few destined ones who can actually use, or better yet make, Combine type jutsu! "HELL YEAH! I'm the best dattebayo!"

But for now he had more work to do, he knew what its Boss would want; learn how to use wind chakra!

_"Aside from the method noted previously on quickly learning how to use wind chakra for cutting, there are several other excercises to be used for budding Wind masters, those that actually want to use their element to the fullest. The first exercise is melding chakra into the air to feel the various currents and how they change. In actuality, this exercise has no ending, it serves to better understand the ever-changing element of wind. The next exercise is to take small, light items and levitate them off your palm, leaves are the best for beginners. Once it feels comfortable to do so, the aspiring wind user may try to use other parts of the body to levitate leaves from, or levitate multiple items at the same time. The third exercise is cutting a leaf in half is the last exercise, even though it becomes usable in jutsu easier than the others. The last once is taking a small amount of water and lifting up small drops of it by sucking away the air above the liquid's surface."_

_" These techniques teach how to feel the wind, create pressure, create blades and create vacuums in order. Further exercises and techniques involve combining these aforementioned four and increasing their magnitude, though individual villages may possess secret training techniques not easily available. To access those, a master would be needed, this world's most valuable resource."_

"Levitate a leaf huh..." Naruto hummed as he took a small leaf and placed it on his palm. That would be awesome since it would train him to use less chakra with his Konohagakure, maybe even figure out what seals to add to the sequence so it can be easily usable by other Konoha ninja.

Then his ingenious/insane mind had another idea; leaves that could levitate... _on their own_! Maybe he could make them stay there, in the air, without any chakra spending after using the technique. If he could do that, then he could almost walk on air! It would be _awesome_!

Of course, that would require extensive planning, maybe even a meld with fuinjutsu, since he would need to 'seal' his chakra into the leaf to sustain the levitation.

Hmmm...

Fuinjutsu...

Ideas, ideas everywhere, raise your voices into the air! Shout them out, make a clatter, fill this mind with endless rattle!

The ensuing 'evil' laugh that issued from the 'Demon's House' was foreboding enough that no civilian would approach it for months.

And so it was that Naruto began unleashing clone after clone in an effort to put his ideas to practice. Of course, he knew he couldn't do everything that came to mind, even he couldn't do that. Instead, he used his clones to write down the best ideas and slowly work them out. So, while some clones worked on wind-chakra control, the better to understand which hand seals they should add to Konohagakure, some of them would break off from the others when inspiration struck, write down their ideas, practice them until they could no longer and, if they had more time left, go back to their original training.

Because making techniques required a great amount of understanding, it also meant learning a lot, which in turn forced Naruto to study even more than he had originally planned. He hadn't started on Fuinjutsu, he thought he should start with at least some Konoha Ninpou jutsu, jutsu that would define him and his style before branching out. He was good with multitasking, Kage Bunshin's the ultimate tool for that, but even he had his limits. Or more like, if he learned things that were too diverse from each other, it gave him headaches that made the worse migrane seem like a pleasant lullaby, not to mention possibly also damage his brain. And considering the brain was a necessary part of jutsu making, not to mention living, he was quite keen on keeping it healthy and happy.

So, for now he was content with his 'Haton' or 'Konoha Ninpo', he still wasn't sure what he should name them.

Still, at the end of the day, all this reading did Naruto a lot of good. It didn't smarten him up, but it did mellow him out, it gave him a way to use his common sense and the street smarts he had gained in his short life as a vagrant

Sasuke actually looked at him as if he were more than an insect under the mud under the sole of his sandals.

Sakura-chan still didn't like him much, but at least she tolerated him. That had to mean something, right? Unfortunately for the blonde, it was much less than he hoped it did.

As for Kakashi? The jounin kept getting more and more impressed every day. The gaki might have the most insane ideas, but somehow he still managed to play them just right to make them work.

Which is why Kakashi had them do several D-rank missions every day now, so he could take his brats out for a C-rank early on. Something simple, like taking an item to a village within a time-limit. Nothing much but just enough to let them know of the world beyond the Gates. Who knows, it may even give the brat some more ideas. Granted most of them were insane and impractical, but skills like the Konohagakure were... they were pure gold at the hands of someone who can use them properly.

So, it is obvious that Kakashi's surprise was great when Naruto called him over while on the job, bouncing up-and-down excitedly.

"Kakashi-sensei!Kakashi-sensei! I made a new jutsu! Look, look, look!" He said and showed a leaf floating above his hand.

"You... made a leaf float?" Kakashi deadpanned. He expected more than just a floating leaf but... but... wait, what? There was a distortion on the wind around the leaf? He was lucky he could pick that little detail out, probably because he had something stable to compare it to... "Naruto, what's that technique?" He asked, curious this time.

"Well, well, sometimes, you just run out of shuriken right, or you don't have time to pick them up or something! Or you just want to surprise someone, right? So, I made this! Konoha Ninpo: Konoha Shuriken! I put in my chakra to make it reaaally stiff and then some wind-chakra to give it an edge! Watch this!" Right after, the excited blonde threw the leaf at a tree.

Or rather _three inches into the tree_.

Kakashi gaped. Imagine an enemy knocking you to the ground. You cower and scramble for help, inconspicuously clawing around for traction. Then you pick up a leaf. As the enemy readies to deliver the final blow... you throw the leaf, straight into their throat! Or any other vital spot for that matter! Instant surprise-counter-killer move!

"Well done Naruto! That's a useful little jutsu, if you can surprise your enemy. Of course, after the first time it's used, no one is going to fall for it of course, but it could help."

Naruto nodded semi-sadly. "I know, but it isn't ready yet..." At Kakashi's inquisitive look, Naruto rubbed the back of his head. "Well, more like, I originally wanted to throw the leaves as well, with my chakra I mean, but I just can't get it right yet. Maybe I need more training, dunno. But I was really thinking about the name, something like 'Konoha Ninpo: Ha-dan (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Bullet/Shot)' or something like that... Seems I have to train more..."

Chuckling uncomfortably was all Kakashi could do. It seemed one of the world's most innocent items would soon become something fearsome.

**A/N: Next chapter's out, enjoy while it's still hot! Next chapter, we are revealing Naruto's Hissatsu Waza/Ougi/Bank- err, scratch that last one.**

**Yeah, well, anyway, this fic's light hearted and fun so it's easier to write, but it's not going to be more than that. Of course, if anyone wants to take these jutsu, go right ahead. Just send a PM and I'll send you all the jutsu I've made.**

**Remember; a review is more important to an author than ten or twenty fav's or alerts! So don't hesitate to review!**

**Oh, and since I forgot, I guess I have to present the jutsu used so far, right? Here we go:**

**Konoha Ninpo: Konohagakure no Jutsu (Leaf Ninja Art: Hidden In The Leaves Technique)**

**Cost: C, Control: C, Rank: C**

**The Konohagakure no Jutsu picks up surrounding leaves and spins them violently around the target, making it very hard to see in an area surrounding him. Said area is dependant on the chakra used. In comparison to the Mizugakure no Jutsu, the Konohagakure can be at times more powerful and less powerful. Not only does it depend on an external medium (while the Mizugakure requires far less, even in water quantities, a large bottle is usually enough) but also it doesn't conceal as completely. However, unlike the Mizugakure, it ruins more than just the sense of sight, but also the sense of touch and the sense of hearing. Leaves used with the Konohagakure no Jutsu are not ruined and may be used with another technique.**

**Konoha Ninpo: Konoha Shuriken (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Shuriken)**

**Cost: D, Control: D, Rank: D**

**One of the easiest Konoha Ninpo possible, however it still requires training with wind chakra to eschew more than a handseal (the others are used to create the wind currents that give the leaves their edge, removing them would make the jutsu pointless). By imbuing one or more leaves with wind chakra to create a wind blade around them and then reinforcing them wtih normal chakra to ensure they will fly as expected and withstand initial impact, the user throws innocent-looking leaves that can actually cut better than shuriken. As a technique it is mostly dependant on the user's skill with shuriken, but it can definitely surprise an enemy. Beyond that, it is mostly used as training to learn how Konoha Ninpo are used. Leaves used this way may or may not be destroyed depending on opposition and supplied chakra. At any rate, the jutsu burns itself out in seconds, so even if they survive, the technique would need to be cast again before throwing them once more.**

**Konoha Ninpo: Ha-dan (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Bullet/Shot)**

**Cost: D, Control C, Rank C**

**The improved form of Konoha Shuriken, it is only slightly harder than the original when used with the handseals necessary, but quite a bit harder when used without. The user not only reinforces the leaf's hardness and grants it a wind blade around it, but also creates a small explosive core of wind between the leaf and his hand (or from wherever he chooses to launch them). As a result, the leaves gain superior velocity and speed, allowing them to travel much further than the previous technique. Thanks to the increased range and very little sound (most of it negated by the wind around the leaf), it can even double as a sniping jutsu.**

**Question: Haton (Leaf Release) or Konoha Ninpo (Leaf Ninja Art)? Either way works with me, just having entirely too much fun messing around with one of the world's most innocent items turned into leathal weapons.  
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><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	4. Chapter 4

_Chapter 4: Amenochi No Midori (Green After The Rain)_

"For your next mission you can walk some dogs, remove the stones in a field, babysit some children-" "HISSSS! MEEEEROWWW!" "TORA-CHWAN! COME BACK TO MOMMY!" "-or go looking for Tora again..." Sighed the Third Hokage, also known as Sarutobi Hiruzen.

Naruto's reaction however was everything but as subdued as his Kage's; he fell to his knees pleading and bowing. "Please! Have mercy! Anything but that! Please, Hokage-sama! I beg you! I implore you! Please! Please give us a better mission! Have mercy on us!"

Iruka tried to interrupt with a detailed listing of how gennin only do D-rank missions and blah-blah-blah... To be stopped by Sandaime's careless "Alright, if Kakashi also agrees."

Ignoring Iruka's stuned attempts at disagreement, Kakshi looked away from his po-err, literature, only to find himself face-to-face with three begging faces doing the perfect imitation of a puppy's pleading eyes. He broke of course, no one can resist that technique, but he had to look cool while doing so... "Well, it's alright by me. The brats have improved enough to take a simple mission on, nothing more than a C-rank, something without fighting hopefully."

"YATTAAAA!" One hyperactive blonde shouted at the top of his lungs before proceeding to bounce around happily. For all his headaches from Kage-Bunshin-overuse (some would say abuse), he was still as excited as ever. Of course, mere seconds after that he chose to crouch down on the ground, hugging his head thanks to all that pain he suffered.

Still, it was easy to see a smile on his face, as well as on the faces of his team mates. They had all been so bored with D-ranks. Really, what part of 'remove the weeds from the field' turned them into better ninja? Lee and Gai could argue that it made them stronger, but really, that's just them.

"So, so, so!" Piped up the blonde once he was done cringing. "What kind of mission is it? Recover some long-lost, precious artifact? Save someone important?" He had stars in his eyes now. "Oh, oh, maybe go in another country, incite a rebellion and win it with our awesome skills!"

The Hokage seemed to actually think about it, though he was mostly teasing the boy. "Hmm, yeah, we could do that, but then you could just take the darn hat off my head Naruto-kun. And then, I would have no hat to shield me from the harsh, hot sun..." He chuckled at the boy that somehow seemed apologetic enough to start promising to get 'jiji' a new hat before becoming Hokage. "But for now, let us stick to something simpler, like a relaxed bodyguard mission. Iruka-kun, please send Tazuna-san in." He said to the still-stunned chuunin, almost laughing at the man's expression and near-robotic movements.

Who said that being a Hokage sucked?

The client however wasn't as amused as the Hokage was, not at Iruka but at the 'three snot-nosed brats' that would be escorting a 'super bridge builder' such as himself. That little comment however resulted in Naruto cutting the man's sake bottle in half with a single leaf and then raising an eyebrow. Sasuke almost chuckled while Kakashi explained that 'even the village's drop-out can kill a man with nothing but a single leaf so maybe angering them wasn't exactly the best move on his part'. As for Sakura? Between scolding Naruto and gawking at the fact that Sasuke had, for once, expressed an emotion on his face, was too out of it to comment.

Then Naruto asked the dreaded question, though no one knew it would be so until then. "So, how long will we be gone? Couple of days? Three max, right?"

It was right about that time that every member of Team Seven and a regretting Hokage realized that with Naruto never leaving the village... he had _no idea_ what the word 'distance' meant.

"Haha, no way, we'll need two days to go there, two to come back and we'll stay for at least a week." Said Kakashi happily.

His happy mood vanished when he realized Naruto had stopped dead in his tracks and in fact looked absolutely terrified if that shaking was anything to go by. "W-w-w-w-what? No, no no no! This, that's a joke, right? Haha, very funny Kakashi-sensei, no way I'm gonna leave for more than a day. No. Fucking. Way." The fact that he cussed out made it all the more shocking.

"Well, sorry to say, but yeah, that's the minimum amount of time we'll be gone, at least nine days, _if_ everything goes well. Better make preparations for two weeks, just in case."

"F-Fourteen days? No! No! I'm NOT leaving for two weeks! My pretties going to suffer! They're going to die! I'm not leaving them alone for that long, not even for your hat jiji!"

Now _that_ was cause for serious concern. Naruto would _never_ say no to the hat. Because, as everyone knew, wearing the hat meant you were the Kage.

"Naruto, who's going to suffer?" Asked Kakashi, crouching down to a frantic, hysteric even, Naruto.

"My... My plants! They're going to _die_!" He wailed, almost like having the funeral of a dear friend. "I have to water them and feed them... Even if someone else goes, they're going to feel so lonely without someone to talk to them..."

"You talk to plants? What are you an idiot?" Snapped Sakura, mostly due to being relieved it was something that unimportant.

She should have kept her mouth shut because the glare sent to her by the blonde was absolutely freezing. "I'm an idiot? Who pulled us through Kakashi-sensei's test? Who has made three new jutsu? Who is it that supplies our team with dozens of clones to do our missions in one tenth of the time? Call me an idiot if you will _Sakura_" He hissed, omitting the honorific to show how upset he was. "But the scientific truth is that plants grow stronger and better when someone converses or sings with them. Even plants have souls!" Then he had already switched to his mourning-child-mode. "And I'm going to abandon them! What a cruel, harsh fate! At this time of year when I must carefully trim their leaves so they can be at their best, such a dangerous time to make sure no pollen goes to the wrong plant to keep the lines strong, after _six years_ of careful planting and maintenance..." And by now he was on his knees, a veritable mess.

"I-I'm sure someone will go water them every couple of days..." Kakashi chuckled uncomfortably.

"Couple of days? COUPLE OF DAYS?" Raged Naruto, fire in his eyes. "Do you not understand the careful presicion needed to take care of a Purple Iris flower?" As soon as he said that, the sole female ANBU that stood guard gasped audibly enough she was heard _outside_ the room. The _sealed_ room.

"You cultivate Purple Irises?" Sakura's voice betrayed a shock poor Sasuke hadn't seen before, so he asked her why that flower was so important. "Sasuke-kun, Purple Irises bloom only once per year and need _perfect_ conditions to do so or they become ruined. Their pollen is key ingredient in many aromatotherapy essenses, its stalk is a unique counter to several poisons and its pettals can be sprinkled over food to maintain its freshness over a great amount of time! It's one of the hardest flowers to grow in fact, whole greenhouses can be devoted to the cultivation of merely ten pots!"

"Naruto... since _when_ have you been growing your plants?" Asked a rather shaky Kakashi; he had had his life saved by such 'innocent flowers' so he had taken his time to learn about them. Hearing that his clumsy, hyperactive, almost insane student actually could grow Purple Irises...

"I said, for six years, haven't I?" Asked Naruto back, wiping his eyes. "And... And not only that, but _this_ time is especially problematic... I'm hoping to crossbreed some of my plants, the previous year showed encouraging results, and I _have_ to be there! A stasis-field around my house won't work either; basic level ones would ruin the delicate balance of humidity and even advanced ones would ruin them due to the offset of time. There's nothing I can do! I can leave a clone behind for a day and maybe miss for another, _maybe_, but ten days? Fourteen days? They're going to die... My pretties are going to die..." Now he was tearing up again.

"Naruto-kun, I may have a solution..." Piped up the Sandaime. "Leave a dozen or so clones of yours behind, each to be placed in stasis. I will ask one of my most loyal jounin, Inoichi Yamanaka, to tend to your flowers and you will have a clone released from stasis each day to watch over and provide instructions. Inoichi-san is very good with flowers, he is the head Herbalist of Konoha, he knows a lot, he can help you even. But, just to be sure, I'll tell him to follow only your orders, alright?"

Naruto only nodded half-heartedly and made several dozen clones while the old man sighed and got his sealing kit. The boy wouldn't trust anyone but the Hokage with it.

Meanwhile, Sasuke thought about making fun of the blonde about his obsession over a few flowers, but if he had snapped at _Sakura_... No one knew what he would do to him, and with the Konoha Ninpou of his increasing in quantity and power, he didn't really want to find out.

So it was with a heavy heart that Naruto left Konoha to go to the Wave Country, a fact he never stopped glaring at Tazuna for. The poor man looked very uncomfortable with Naruto, and with good reason at that. Who knew where the blonde was planning to send his cutting leaves next?

At first it was calm and quiet, something the jounin was grateful for. I mean, if there was trouble, he'd have to stop reading Icha Icha, and that's just not good, right? But, somewhere within him, the veteran shinobi (whom he hides unconsciously because one look from _him_ would make half of Konoha's jounin to shit their pants) also noted that missions without trouble are the best. No losses, guaranteed gains, what's not to like?

Which was why, when he sensed the trouble up ahead, he all but groaned. However, he was well aware that his gennin had grown stronger and with that, so had their pride. They needed a fight to show them that while they had grown, it wasn't nearly enough to take on a chuunin.

So, when the bladed chain appeared 'all of a sudden', he acted shocked long enough for it to wrap around him, or his Kawarimi-Bunshin combo anyway. Even if he hadn't detected their little illusion, he would have had time to replace himself three times by the time their chain was around him, let alone when it would have 'grabbed' him.

"One-" "-Down." The distorted voices of the two unknown ninja came before pulling hard on their chain and ripping 'Kakashi' apart.

"Naruto, ranged support, Sakura, bodyguard!" Snapped out Sasuke, the team's leader. Naruto hadn't liked it, but Sasuke had the right mixture between Naruto's spontaneity and Sakura's patience to take the position. Didn't mean Naruto had to like it, but at least the blonde accepted it. Of course, speaking does not prevent one from moving and engaging in combat, proven by Sasuke who immidiately threw several kunai at the chain, pinning it on a tree, and withdrawing another pair for the melee that was about to begin.

Having trained a lot under Kakashi, Naruto knew what Sasuke was going to do and exactly when he was going to dash left or right. So, using that he sent forward several clones under guise of kunai; the attackers would be highly surprised by the sudden change. Besides, he had already mastered the Kawarimi to a point he could switch with someone else, say Sasuke for example.

Kakashi had originally worried about the blonde, he hadn't seemed too stable before this. In fact, the more he had learned of him, the more he had worried about Naruto's state of mind, or rather the ingenius insanity that had afflicted him. There was no sign of that now. Apparently, the boy had found some books on proper shinobi conduct; he could do anything he wanted off duty, but while in a mission, or even worse a combat situation, he would turn into a proper shinobi; focused, controlled and lethal.

While the left brother, Gozu if Kakashi was right though it was hard to tell with twins, tried to claw at Sasuke, he was quite surprised to hit only a bunshin and find several kunai headed on him. He blocked of course, clawed gauntlets have the advantage of closing a gap in the defences quickly enough, but he was even more surprised when, after the clanking sound that denoted the successful block, hands seemed to grab his hand. Hands that belonged to several orange-garbed kids, with a kunai in their other hand, quickly aiming for his arm. Gozu of course tried to reel back, but the clones had a firm grasp on his hand, which was attached to him, and quickly stabbed, ruining his hand until he could get to a medic.

Of course, one did not become a shinobi, let alone a rogue, without some back-ups to fall back on. Biting back a curse from the pain, Gozu's left hand went to his pack and pulled out a ninjato. One good thing about him and Meizu was that they often changed positions in their attacks; hence they had both trained themselves to fight with either hand, becoming ambidextrous. He might not have enough strength to launch a proper offence, but Gozu was sure he could at least raise his clawed hand in defence.

Alas it was not to be. Kakashi had decided that enough was enough; the clones wouldn't last the attack and no matter how well Sasuke was doing against a similarly disabled Meizu (who had caught a kunai with his kneecap and now cursing inventively enough to surprise Tazuna), it wouldn't matter in the end; a gennin is a gennin. A talented gennin is still a gennin. Sasuke and Naruto still had a lot to learn, but their progress was visible. So, with a burst of speed he was sure would amaze his students (he really didn't need to go full speed against Gozu and Meizu, the poor fools hadn't even realized they had only gotten a poor Log, blessed it be in its loggedness).

"Well done team, good job." He praised his brats once they relaxed after finding their targets unconscious in less time than it takes to blink. Kakashi could honestly say he liked the unvoiced awe in their eyes. Then there was Tazuna. Two chuunin wouldn't have dared attack a jounin like himself without good cause (he _was _quite famous after all), neither would they go after a pair of gennin. So why had these two attacked them? The only answer would lie with Tazuna (there were other answers of course, but Tazuna was the easiest one to investigate without going further into interrogation than he wanted to show to a bunch of gennin; who knew if the next Orochimaru hid beneath one of those innocent faces?). "So, anything you want to share with us Tazuna-san?" Ah, there it was, that flinch that every untrained person (and ashamadly enough many shinobi) made when caught red-handed.

"W-w-what do y-you mean Hatake-san?" Asked the nervous man, this time managing to draw the gennin's eyes on him.

"Well, apart from never calling Kakashi-sensei 'Hatake-san' before, the flinch when he adressed you and the fact you seem ready to bolt," Naruto listed off casually but making sure to ready a Kawarimi with a stone just in case the man tried to run off. "there's also the fact these guys would never have attacked a Jounin as famous as Kakashi-sensei or a bunch of new gennnin like us. So yeah, I think he means 'come clean _now_' or something to that effect."

"N-No way! I-I'm just an average bridge builder that-"

"Oh, would you cut that already? The act's getting more annoying than your regular behaviour you drunkard." Sasuke snapped.

"And what would _you_ know brat?" Snapped Tazuna back. "My country's dieing because of a rich midget! My bridge is this country's sole hope of survival! Do you know how it is to see your people's spirit die day by day? My one grandson, merely half your age, thinks it's pointless to resist. But I'm not giving up! If I have to lie to a rich village that _obviously_ doesn't need my meager leftover money, I'll do so! So, take your holier-than-thou attitude and shove it! The money I paid for a C-rank mission was all the money my country _has_!"

"If you have to lie, I have to kill, Tazuna-san." Spoke Kakashi, a calm threat behind his words. "Konoha may not need money in an obvious way, but there are many other ways you could have made up for the mission's cost. Moreover, you took three thirteen year old kids, children who haven't been shinobi for more than a few _months_ and put them against people strong enough to evade capture from their home villages for _years_. Those two are the so-called Demon Brothers, Gozu and Meizu, chuunin-ranked missing ninja from Mizugakure. If it hadn't been me or had one of us been less careful, you would have one of these innocent children's lives on your hands. So _you_ take your holier-than-thou attitude away from us before _I_ shove it down your throat!"

Poor Tazuna reeled back from Kakashi's rant. In all the time he had seen the jounin, he had been laid-back, calm and polite. He definitely hadn't expected that harsh a reaction, nor had he expected Kakashi to look like he _meant_ it. "L-Look, I'm sorry, alright? It's just we've been stressed so much... People starving to death, workers abandoning the bridge, no food or money in sight... That bastard has locked down the entire country... I have to do something about it! I don't care if you're going to kill me, but do it after the bridge is built. Just... Just let me take care of my family."

Kakashi sighed. Despite his annoyance, anger even, he could see where the man came from. There was war and each fought their own way; Gatou with his money and Tazuna with his building skills. Truth be told, he too wanted the damn thing to succeed, if not for the praise then for his own peace of mind, but that would mean putting his gennin, _his brats,_ in further danger. There was someone who often worked with the Demon Brothers... "Alright team, time to discuss some things. Our client lied to us about the mission; as he has done so willingly, placing a team in intentional danger, the protocol states that we should 'make an example' and return. However, he seems to have had no choice so we can skip the punishment part. Also there is one more thing: the Demon Brothers rarely work alone, there is someone who often leads them, a jounin named Momochi Zabuza, one of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist. If he were to attack... I would survive, but I am not sure I would be able to protect you as well."

"Zabuza is that strong Kakashi-sensei?" Asked Sakura, afraid.

Kakshi only nodded solemnly. "In this world, there are people younger than you but stronger than me. It is also possible that Zabuza may have more accomplices by his side. If that's the case..." He let the words fade. "At any rate, I call our actions to a vote; I vote against continuing the mission, what do you guys believe."

All three gennin thought about it. They were confident in their skills, Sakura much less than the boys. However, Kakashi was _strong_, like _crazy strong_. If there was a guy that could hold him off, or even beat him... Worse, if there was _several_ such guys? They were confident, but their defeat at his hand made them realize that they were still only gennin, as loathe as a certain pair of them might be to admit that.

Naruto made up his mind the easiest. "I don't know about all that complicated 'country dies if I don't make a big-ass bridge' stuff." He huffed. "Nor do I care. But... if I don't try to help them, I won't be able to sleep at night. Tazuna's doing his best, so we have to help him. That's what heroes do, right?"

"Yeah, and we're the 'big damn heroes' huh?" Snarked Sasuke. "But you're right, if I backed off, I'm gonna wonder what would happen if I hadn't for the rest of my life." He also remembered Itachi's words; _'run, run and cling to life, live out a miserable, pathetic and unsightly existence!'_ Well, if that's what the murderer wanted... well fuck him sideways with a morningstar dammit! He was Uchiha Sasuke, last of his clan and he took orders from nobody!

Well, except maybe the Hokage, Kakashi and his mother. Gods knew he still remembered the first, and last, time he cursed near her. His ass _still_ hurt.

"Well, if the dobe goes on alone, he's more likely to hop around hugging trees than fight, guess _someone_ will have to keep him in line, so I'm going as well." Sasuke finished, snickering at Naruto's indignant cries. None of the two would admit it, but that banter of the two was balm to their soul. They had both been so _unbearably lonely_ that they sometimes doubted the world around them even existed. Their friendly banter and disagreement, it was like having reality prove itself as 'real', like a moment of clarity in a period of insanity.

The fact they would both admit to being insane at any moment made it a bit more literal, but that's a different story (one that involves ramen, tomatoes, a Log and a string, though someone would add a mouse).

Seeing the other two agree, specifically _Sasuke-kun_, Sakura's choice was obvious: "Well, since Sasuke-kun is going... I-I will go too..."

Fangirlism. The worlds' greatest scourge. No I did not make a typo here. _Every world's_.

Kakashi sighed. He could sympathize with the brats, pulling back from their very first mission was... It was a matter of pride for them. Then there was also the fact that Wave Country would die if they didn't do something about the situation. "Very well, we're moving on. Sasuke, take point. Sakura, rear guard. Naruto, you and I take the sides, make some clones to scout, but keep them close."

Taking their positions was done quickly and efficiently, helped along by hours of training. Many clones were also dispersed to help create a rudimentary perimeter. It wouldn't help much, but maybe, just maybe, they'd get lucky.

That plan was quickly scrapped as they reached a river. Kakashi could easily cross it on foot, it was part of being a trained ninja for so long that he could do things nobody else expected, but his students couldn't do that yet. Well, Naruto might be able to, if he knew how, he had to have learned to control his chakra lest he burned out his leaves, but he hadn't taught them this particular trick. He resolved to fix that mistake as soon as possible. So, for now they would cross over on boat, thankfully Tazuna had a friend that would take them to the other side.

Through the mist, the grand creation of the bridge builder was slowly revealed like a ghostly silhouette.

"Amazing..." Breathed out Naruto as he laid eyes on the building. Not one of the Konoha ninja could disagree, it was truly magnificent.

Seamlessly falling back into formation, Tazuna hoped he would get to his home quickly. There was little time to waste; Gatou's men would soon come out for patrols and, as much as he might have wanted to believe in the ninja escorting him, he didn't. What could three brats and a single man do?

Suddenly, Naruto and Sasuke turned and threw a kunai each at a nearby bush, prompting Sakura to squeal in terror and surprise, while Kakashi quickly went to the bushes to see what his gennin caught.

A rabbit. Or bunny, whatever, he could never tell the difference (women could apparently, but he was a hot-blooded male thank-you-very-much).

The only problem? Its fur was white. "White fur... But it's summer so why would it..." Then came the expected 'ooh _shit_' moment and he quickly dove to Sakura and Tazuna, pushing them to the ground. "Get down!"

Not a moment too late either as Naruto and Sasuke hit the deck, letting a spinning blade pass right through where their heads were and hack straight into a tree's trunk.

"Well, well, if it isn't Hatake Kakashi. I'm kinda honored to meet such a legend, copy-nin." Spoke the man that seemed to faze into existence over the cleaver-like sword. "I'd love to stay and chat but, since I'd like to get this over with soon, would you mind giving me that old man?"

Kakashi sighed. It was one of _those_ days wasn't it? First the Demon Brothers, then Gatou and now Zabuza? What god had he pissed off lately?

"I'm afraid I can't Momochi Zabuza. Even though he is a lieing drunkard, he is still our client and honor demands we protect him. How about you let us pass today, Demon of the Mist?"

Exchanging pleasantries with a rogue ninja. Oh the novelties of shinobi life eh?

"Seems like we're at an impasse then. But you already knew that didn't you? So, how about we get this show on the road?"

Kakashi sighed, he knew what was coming after. The technique that was perfectly fitted to Zabuza.

There it was; that placement of his hands; twin ram seals, one in front of the chest and the other over head. **"Kirigakure no Jutsu..."** Zabuza's voice intoned before the mist thickened and covered everything.

"Eight points, lethal and vulnerable. Liver, lungs, spine, clavical artery, neck vein, brain, kidneys and heart... So, where should I go for first?" Zabuza's voice came from all around the group, successfully scaring the crap out of the gennin.

Kakashi sighed. He knew he had to do this, but that didn't mean he had to like it. His hand went to his headband and pulled it up... revealing a weird eye; where his other was black, this one was a deep crimson red and had three tomoes surrounding the pupil.

The Sharingan. You could hear the capitals.

And that was the moment that Naruto, ever the ingenious prankster and spunky brat, decided to make light of the whole situation. "Well, considering the size of that choppa you're holdin' like it's feathers, I don't really think _where_ you strike really matters."

That was delivered with such a deadpan voice that even Zabuza chuckled. It was tons better for Sasuke; the poor boy was flashing back to _that day_ thanks to the rogue's killing intent. Kakashi on the other hand laughed internally; he had been so preoccupied with his duel that he forgot to take Naruto into account.

"Naruto, give us a smokescreen." He ordered, smirking. The mist ninja was in for a nasty surprise.

"A smokescreen? Are you an idiot? I am a master at silent killing, I could kill you before you even realized it. On top of that, I've already placed a smokescreen, so it's obvious visual impediments are to my advantage so what-"

"Oh, would ya shut up, no-brows!" Naruto challenged, his love for riling people up awakening. "What's that sword for? Compensating for something?" While the poor rogue gaped at the boy's apparent gall and lack of fears (internally also admitting that the blonde probably had balls of solid steel to say that to him), Naruto was finished moulding his chakra the way he needed to. It was necessary after all; he had to alter the jutsu _just_ a bit; create more wind to blow away the mist and also charge more chakra for his _ougi_.

**"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu."** He whispered, creating several clones and hiding them before shifting his hands to his unique jutsu. **"Konohagakure no Jutsu!"**

Wind picked up violently, tearing leaves from the trees and lifting them from the ground before spinning them randomly around.

Naruto almost called it his 'shitstorm jutsu' for obvious reasons.

Kakashi couldn't help but smirk. Now it was a bit more even; Zabuza depended on extreme sense of hearing to find his targets. However, the fluttering leaves completely disrupted it. Kakashi on the other hand depended on his sense of scent, which the leaves did little to prevent. Sure, the wind impeded it a bit, but not nearly enough to stop a genius shinobi like himself. Drawing his trusty kunai, he charged.

Clanging of metal against metal came through the leafy cover, sounds of exertion and calls of techniques that the gennin hadn't heard of reached their ears.

In the middle of the shitstorm, Zabuza was being pushed back. Kakashi was of a very high level and, even though the Sharingan wasn't fully operational in such circumstances, he was still good enough to nail him a couple of times. He had also landed a couple of blows on the Konoha dog, but it wasn't enough to decide the battle, or even affect it significantly.

Damn it.

Fine, if it's like that, then it's time to take it up a notch.

Allowing himself to be driven back was easy, back on to the water. Then, a quick half-seal after ward and a water clone came from behind him, quickly replace with it and there! Kakashi stabbed it, destroying the clone -and falling right into Zabuza's trap!

**"Suiton: Suiro no Jutsu."** Water rose around Kakashi and made a bubble of heavy liquid. A prison.

"Well, shit." Kakashi deadpanned. Then, frantic. "Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura! Take Tazuna and run! He can't chase you while he's concerned with me!"

Surprised, and worried, by his teacher's cry, Naruto let up on his jutsu and gasped at what he saw. Kakashi-sensei was trapped. That was _not good_. Definitely not good.

Well, when life gives you lemons... make orange juice and let the world figure out how you did it!

"Like hell we're running away, right, Sasuke, Sakura? Dunno about you Kakashi-sensei, but running away just aint my style, ya know? Let's kick it up a gear-tebbayo!" Chakra surged around Naruto and he grinned. His clones behind him sent several covert signals to Sasuke; the genius should be able to figure things out.

"Hmph, disrespectful brat. I will teach you the meaning of fear and pain. For now, these clones of mine should be enough to finish things." And with a single seal, something that surprised Kakashi greatly, several clones of Zabuza rose from the water and walked forward, intent on killing Team Seven.

Naruto walked forward, taking point. He had to do this just right now. No second chances. He closed his eyes and focused. The words came to his mouth more in order to enhance his focus rather than for any true need. **"Haton... Mori no Me (Leaf Style: Forest's Eyes)..."** He breathed out.

Kakashi watched in surprise as the Konohagakure picked up once again, but not so strongly as before; it seemed more like an aura around Naruto. There was also this peculiar chakra that came from the leaves...

To Naruto, it was an endless, black void, littered only by lights moving around him, carried on a wind of his creation. Where they flowed, it was free. Where they met resistance, he knew it.

Zabuza could no longer hide from his 'eyes'.

Initiate second phase.

Naruto's overhead hand (his right), suddenly lashed to the right and then to the left in a cutitng movement before making a quick circle back to place. "If you think you can fight me, then come, Zabuza! I am the Leaf-Style Shinobi, Uzumaki Naruto!"

"Hmph, as you please brat. Die!" He called out to the taunt and his clones flew forward.

Naruto's clones also charged ahead, straight at Zabuza's clones while the originals remained rooted to the spot.

Two cleavers flashed in attack.

Two puffs of smoke... Nothing.

Kakashi gaped; the clones!

**"Konoha ninpou: Ougi: Mori Yuurei!"** Naruto called out proudly.

Zabuza's clones broke down to water as Naruto's clones appeared over them, kunai wet with water.

"W-what? What happened?" Sakura asked Sasuke, mirroring Zabuza's question.

Only Kakashi had seen it, his sharingan spinning in amazement. _'That ingenious brat! That's why he had asked me about Kawarimi! Leaves are normally too small to replace one's self with, but with the amount of his chakra imbued in them, it must be easier than a normal log! Also, thanks to him slowing down the Konohagakure, the clones could easily choose which leaf to replace with! The ball is now right in Naruto's court! Well done!'_

While everyone gawked at Naruto, Sasuke wasn't about to let it go. Discreetly, he readied himself and left the open field, leaving a bunshin in his place. It wouldn't do much, but thankfully it would buy him the time needed.

Naruto's clones charged Zabuza now faster and he replied by calling out several more of his clones.

It was no use; as soon as the water clones attacked, Naruto's clones would instantly replace themselves with a leaf and attack. Of course they had to keep one hand constantly in a half-ram seal, but the ougi was still imperfect. Still, they were winning, they were winning!

Sakura watched in awe as Naruto's clones seemed to flutter in tandem with the leaves, their master not once moving from his spot or opening his eyes.

Eventually, Zabuza found the lag time needed between each substitution, but with the clones moving so completely randomly, it was hard to take advantage of it, even as he struggled, sweating more and more to keep up with the damn brat -how much chakra did the blonde have anyway?

Sasuke instead smirked. Four clones had followed him into the folliage and they all linked together their shuriken and wires. It would all depend on a moment's notice!

Seamlessly, the clones replaced themselves with the ones fighting, with none being the wiser to the strings attached, thanks to the rapid movement, none but Kakashi, whose eyes picked up the reflection of steel. He didn't have much time to think about it because in an instant, the trap was sprung!

Shuriken came from the forest, circling around Zabuza, their sound unheard until it was too late thanks to the clones suddenly shouting "NOW!"

Wires, sharp and hard wraped around Zabuza and the four clones dashed in four different directions, essentially binding up the ninja, breaking his prison jutsu in the process.

"W-What? When did these guys?" Zabuza was beyond surprised; these greenhorns have managed such a plan? Unbelievable! The wires wouldn't hold him for long, he was strong enough to break them easily, but in that time...

Kakashi rose from the water, looking like a wet dog ironically enough, glaring holes into Zabuza. "Well, seems like we are on again. For the record, a move that worked once on me, won't work again, Zabuza."

What followed after that declaration was a fight between two titans; two jounin that were fully deserving of their rank, unlike others (*cough* Ebisu *cough*).

The end to the fight however was very anti-climactic. Just as Kakashi was ready to kill Zabuza, two needles flew out of the trees and stabbed Zabuza on the neck. Another ninja appeared then, claiming they had been hunting Zabuza for a long time and took him away for disposal.

Mere seconds later, Kakashi fell over, unable to move. His sharingan had exhausted him. Naruto was quick to follow, only not so badly off; he still had a lot of chakra and endurance, but Mori no Yuurei and such an extended Konohagakure no Jutsu had sapped him pretty badly. Of course, that did not keep him from boasting to anyone with half an ear to hear.

Moving to Tazuna's home was peaceful after that, even though they still made haste just in case. Once there in its relative safety (and in the arms of a _very_ attractive woman, Kakashi was very happy to note), Kakashi called a team meeting.

"First of all, I should congratulate all of you. Even if you did nothing Sakura, just the fact you held your ground against Zabuza speaks volumes of you, trust me. Sasuke, Naruto, you also cooperated excellently and got me out of that nasty situation. Sasuke, your shurikenjutsu are top-notch, I don't think Itachi was ever as good as you are now, keep up the good work." He smiled and received a smile in return. "Also, Naruto, good job with that jutsu of yours. You really caught me by surprise, replacing yourself with your own jutsu's leaves, it was a good name, Forest Ghost."

Naruto smiled proudly. He had worked his ass off for this and finally, it was paying off! "I know, I know! I had to slow down the Konohagakure and reduce its spins so it's easier to control the Kawarimi. You actually have to predict where the leaf is going to be when the jutsu activates or else you'll end up completely off, you know? The half-ram in front of my chest is responsible for the chakra mold but the other hand controls the spin and directions, that's why I did that with my hands, I had to remove a few spins. Then, when you have the spinning down to your desired level, ready the Kawarimi and choose a leaf, since you're making the jutsu, you know where it's going to end up, but getting the timing right is hard. There's also the Kawarimi that-"

"Naruto... why are you explaining the jutsu to us?" Sasuke asked, rightfully curious. The blonde had even pulled out a few scrolls with the names of his jutsu on each scroll, except the Mori no Me technique.

Naruto just shot him a questioning glance. "Why? Because I want to teach it to you, of course. I mean, it's natural; I'm gonna be a Hokage and the Hokage teach their shinobi all their jutsu. So, I'm going to teach you most of mine; some I'll keep for myself. I know it's selfish, but I just want a few jutsu for my own kids, you know?" He looked strangely at Sasuke, almost not understanding why everyone looked at him as if he was from another world.

"Naruto? That's _your_ jutsu, it's yours to use. You're not supposed to teach it to others." Kakashi tried to reason with his student.

"What are you talking about Kakashi-sensei? Of course I'm supposed to. Iruka-sensei said that the Hokage teach their shinobi all their jutsu. So, I'd better start teaching my jutsu from early on. You guys are the first to learn them, dunno if I'm gonna do a good job at teaching them and-"

"Whoa, whoa, hold up Naruto. Iruka-sensei did say that the ninja of Konoha learned many jutsu from the Hokage, but that did not mean that every Hokage taught _every _single one of their jutsu." Sakura cut him off. Seeing him not understanding, she continued. "It's true that every Hokage left several jutsu behind for the rest of us, but they didn't leave us everything. Each of them had unique techniques that they taught no one. Some jutsu are just for yourself you know? Besides, you invented these techniques from scratch, don't you feel it's... I don't know... bad... to just give them away?"

"Of course not. I'm going to be a Hokage so I have to teach my jutsu. Iruka-sensei said so, so I'm going to do it." Naruto was definitely set on his current beliefs.

"Ugh, what a stubborn dobe. Listen, if you had actually paid attention to _all of the lecture_," Sasuke stopped the blonde idiot savant, "you would have learned that they only passed down some of their jutsu, the easier and more generic ones. Each technique is personnal, you're not supposed to teach your jutsu to anyone. It's actually an insult if someone tries to learn something you developed from you, unless you offer first. New jutsu are a very important responcibility, dobe, you need to respect them."

Kakashi sighed, his head felt like he had a bloody hedgehog in his skull, trieing to get free. "Alright, you brats have just exhausted me with this. Go get some rest, tomorrow, I'll teach you something important. Also, Naruto, do _not_ teach your techniques to anyone, for now. I'll... I'll explain why later. Now let me sleep, damned brats..." He grumbled and dismissed them, wanting nothing more than to sleep.

He hadn't even told them of the hunter-nin's true purpose yet...

**A/N: As has been asked by a reviewer, Naruto seems to want to share his jutsu with the rest of Konoha. Yes, that is true; remember that Iruka said that the Hokage taught their jutsu to the newer generations. While they didn't teach everything, Naruto doesn't know it and his simplistic mind (yes, he is simplistic for all his ability to improvise and actually think lately), believes that as a Hokage he should share **_**every**_** jutsu he makes with **_**every**_** Leaf ninja. he considers himself very greedy that he wishes to keep some of his finest techniques to his family alone. As you have seen, the confrontation on this matter occured in this chapter and has set him right.**

**After getting both sides of the Haton/Konoha Ninpo dilemma (and until I get more votes on that), I will split them thusly; techniques that Naruto will share with everyone will be called 'Konoha Ninpo' while those he will keep to himself and his family will be Haton. Still, do not be mistaken; there is no leaf-type chakra, just the ability to manipulate a medium. Anyone could do it, but only Naruto is insane enough to try and has a convoluted enough mind to actually succeed.**

**Also, some have asked if Naruto is insane. He is, sorta. Or more like, his brain has been pushed way beyond what a normal brain normally could. Think about it this way; if you study a book, it tires you out. If you study many books, the fatigue is exponential in increase. Now, if you were to read several books at the same time, even if their subject is similar, there would be no fatigue; there would be **_**exhaustion**_**. Because of that, Naruto's brain tries to compensate and rebuild itself, but doing so leads to thoughts that are classified as less than sane. It isn't something permanent, more like a way to cope, but it does affect him. Of course, he could always use his insanity to hide away who he really is or what he thinks, but that will come later on.**

**Finally****, there will be no usage of Mokuton by Naruto. He will **_**not**_** have that ability. What he has, thanks to his Senju roots, is an innate talent at taking care of plants. That is all, no more, no less.**

**If you dislike those choices, well, you are free to adopt this fic with my blessings. Matter of fact, anyone out there who wants to adopt it?**

**Please? No, really, if you like it, have your own ideas, or just want to help out a writer in a bind, please adopt it!**

**Jutsu made for this fic will also belong to you (and sent to you via PM or DocX).**

**Konoha Ninpo**** Ougi****: Mori no Yuurei (Leaf Ninja Art: Ghost Of The Forest)**

**Cost: B, Control: B, Rank: B**

**Naruto's original final move using the Konoha Ninpo line. So far his strongest move, though it takes so much out of even him that he rarely uses it. By having a clone maintain the Konohagakure (a prerequisite and one of the reasons of this high ****chakra cost), he uses the Kawarimi to switch with the leaves whirling around. Thanks to the Konohagakure being infused with his chakra, he feels the leaves almost as if through a radar (see 'Haton:Mori no Me') and can switch his leaves easier than if switching with a log, even with their smaller size, as they have already been attuned to him. With more training, it is possible to drop the one-handed seal and perform it even faster, becoming almost a ghost.**

**Haton: Mori no Me (Leaf Style: Forest's Eyes)**

**Cost: F, Control: C, Rank: D**

**A sensor-type jutsu unique to Naruto. It uses the feedback of the leaves as they bounce off everything to give a fuzzy radar-like image of the world around him. It has no color nor is it extremely accurate (wouldn't show an item the size of a kunai and smaller, while a sword and similar thin items would register only barely), but it does a good job of showing the location of anyone who can't avoid contact (which, thanks to the sheer number of leaves, is impossible even to the Sharingan and Byakugan). Thanks to the fact that 'feedback' occurs at each and every collision, the average brain is unable to cope with the stress of so many 'pings' and simply disregards them as 'white noise'. Naruto can use it because his use of Kage Bunshin has forcibly (and not without side-effects) evolved his brain to cope with such a level of multi-tasking.**

**Note that even the Byakugan can't see clearly through the Konohagakure; between the sheer number of leaves, the chakra-infused wind and the chakra within the leaves, it would take a genius to see even the general location of someone inside that jutsu, mostly because it's so darn distracting. At least in my opinion, disagreements welcome.**

**I am still unsure what Kyubi's power would do to the leaves... Burn them out? Overload the techniques? Just ruin them due to its toxicity? Nothing at all?  
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><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	5. Chapter 5

_Chapter 5: Shiro Mori (White Forest)_

**A/N: Just in case you don't pay attention to Author Notes at the end of the chapter...**

**Someone please adopt this fic!**

Breakfast was a quiet affair, and somewhat painful from Kakashi's viewpoint. Still, it had been good to see everyone fine, gods know how many assassinations happened while the victims were asleep in the safety of their own homes. Kakashi had done several of them himself. Tsunami was a very capable housewife however, apparent by the fact that despite their meager food supplies, she was able to whip up a hearty, fulfilling breakfast.

There was of course a boy a kid named Inari, who kind of made things depressing more than quiet, but Kakashi could deal with it. Same thing couldn't be said about Naruto, who reacted somewhat weird.

"Why are you trying anyway? You're all gonna die. Gatou's already won." Spat the little boy while glaring at Naruto and Sasuke, the two discussing various jutsu and how to combine their arsenal.

"Well, Iruka-sensei said that you only loose when you give up.'Sides, I haven't survived so far in Konoha by being easy to kill, neither's Sasuke or Kakashi-sensei. Sakura-chan has a bit of work ahead of her, but I don't think she's just going to lay down and die."

"Oh yeah, and who's that _Iruka-sensei_ guy huh? I bet he's just another looser!"

_Oooh... __**shitpiss...**_ Kakashi and the rest of the team thought while Naruto seemed to simply... loose emotion.

For an emotionless glare, there were few things that could rival it in hostility or creepiness.

"Listen here, _brat_." Naruto spat venomously, making Sakura shiver, remembering the last time he spoke like that. "If you ever disrespect Iruka-sensei in front of me, I'm going to rip out your guts, tie them around your throat and hang you from the ceiling, got it? And if you _ever_ even _imply_ anything bad about my friends, I'll make death seem like the sweetest release possible. Go die in a ditch, looser, death's already better than life, isn't that why you're thinking? So why don't you do us _all_ a favour and slit your wrists you damn crybaby."

Ignoring the shocked look from his team, though Kakashi also had an underline of sadness and Sasuke one of vindication, Naruto stormed out of the house. He only stopped at the door to look back and tell them he was going to look for a good place to train. Then he was gone.

"W-Whatever! He just made it up! Doesn't like that someone's actually suffered while he had his family coddling hi-" Further talk from the boy was halted violently when Sasuke leapt at him, brought him to the ground and stopped his kunai less than an inch from the boy's right eye.

"Made up? Coddled?" Sasuke spat out venomously. One thing he shared in common with the blonde was that they had both suffered, they had both known loss. "You pathetic little weakling, what do you think you know of pain? Of suffering? Of sorrow? Of LONELINESS?" Sasuke was shaking now, his eyes red with fury. Suddenly he pulled back. "You are not even worth killing. At least you have your mother and your grandfather. I lost my entire clan in one night to my own brother and Naruto… He never had anyone to begin with, instead he had to shoulder glares and insults from the entire village. I'm following the dobe, I'll make sure he's alright."

"Wait, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura made to follow her crush, but Kakashi quickly held her back. "Kakashi-sensei! I have to go to Sasuke-kun!"

"And do what? He needs time to calm down now. We'll get to them soon enough. Both of these boys... they have suffered far more than they should have, only war victims can say they have felt more pain. To handle all that pain as well as they have until now, they are much stronger than any of you here may think." Kakashi finished calmly, giving a very sharp look at both the boy and his female student. "Anyway, Sakura, go fetch my med-kit from my bag. I'm going to show you a few tricks for field medics. Most of that stuff isn't in books, its things you learn by experience, might as well get you as much as we can."

Sasuke found Naruto only a few minutes walk away from Tazuna's home. The blonde was furiously punching a tree. Impressively enough, he had already made a dent into the wood.

"Life's not fair you know." Sasuke began, nonchalantly though internally he was just as angry as his team mate. He could just control it better.

"I know. I've known since I was little. Why did other children have parents? Why did they laugh? Why did they have toys? Why did they have food and clothes?" Naruto stopped punching the tree, instead preferring to lie back against it. "I've known it but that doesn't mean I like it. Instead, I get that damn brat thinking he's got it the worst... hell, I'm sure someone has had it worse than the both of us combined! How could that damn brat just give up so easily?"

"He just reminds you of yourself right?" Sasuke smirked against the glare then his eyes softened as he took a seat next to Naruto on the same tree. "Same with me. Sometimes, you just can't help but wonder, _'why did I get up this morning'_, _'why am I even alive'_, _'why don't I just give up'_... Giving up seems so easy some times, doesn't it? Just lay down and stop breathing, no more pain, no more worries, just silence, darkness and peace..."

"But we're not meant for peace, is that what you say? Some part of us just likes going up against all that, what are we, masochists?"

"That, or we've already gone off the deep end, trapped inside a dream within a dream. Or maybe, just maybe, we are simply stronger. What do you think?"

"I'll take answer number two with a little bit of number one. Then again, can _you_ imagine any sane gennin fight a jounin like we have? Pshh, we could make psychologists need psychiatrists. That's how messed up we are."

"It's not us, it's the world that's messed up!" Cried out Sasuke suddenly, throwing his arms in the air comically.

Both gennin broke down laughing hysterically after that. Yeah, neither of them was exactly 'sane' or even near it.

An hour later, enough time for the both to calm down by Kakashi's reasoning, the two were found deep in a taijutsu match. Naruto was the first to speak, though Sasuke's eyes held the exact same words his team mate spoke, "Oi, what the hell took you so long? Don't tell me there's something _secret_ going between you two?" The slight wiggling of his eyebrows made the 'secret' quite clear and both male gennin enjoyed Kakashi's gagging reactions (he wasn't a pedophile, for crying out loud) and Sakura's screeches of denial.

"Alright, if you feel well enough to joke, then you're good enough to train. It's a good thing we have a forest here too. You see, Zabuza is probably still alive; Hunter-nin dispose of their target's body where it falls and senbon are weapons that rarely kill, even if it had been poisoned it would have taken time to affect someone like Zabuza no matter how potent the toxin. If that's the case, next time, we stand against not only Zabuza, but his accomplice as well. I can handle Zabuza himself, but you'd have to take care of that fake ninja. And knowing that Zabuza wouldn't cooperate with a weakling, he's bound to be good. Even together you probably wouldn't be enough. Or at least not without one of you dieing." He amended, remembering how good their teamwork really was. "So, the only way to win is by me power-training you into a few tricks that may save your lives long enough for me to win and come to you."

"I'm sure that the other ninja is probably strong, but he can't be that good, can he Kakashi-sensei?" Asked Sasuke, quite upset that his skill was being called into question.

"I didn't even sense his presence, Sasuke. That makes him an expert in assassination. If he's Zabuza's accomplice, that also means he's good at striking from cover, so even Naruto's Konohagakure wouldn't be as useful. Your only chance is for me to eliminate his concealment and hope his direct combat skills are not better than his silent killing method. Now, here's the first real piece of training you're going to receive. I'd be surprised if you finish it in less than a week, but even if you do, you will continue training it, it's very important and useful. Now watch carefully." And with that, Kakashi walked, or limped, towards a nearby tree and... began walking straight up!

"H-H-How? That's impossible!" Cried out Sakura, rather loudly. Stealth wasn't her forte.

"With chakra, duh." Deadpanned Naruto. "I mean, we can throw fireballs and stuff, Kakashi-sensei and Zabuza fought on water, is walking vertically so hard to grasp?"

"Obviously, he seems to be channeling a small amount of chakra to the soles of his feet. I saw the grass move a bit but not too much. Am I correct, sensei?" Sasuke kept up the observations; he was good with that.

"But, but the books and the teachers hadn't said anything about walking on trees!" She kept on her denials.

"Because, if the had, all of us would have tried and gotten injured. Also, can't have ninja training techniques just lieing around pointlessly, even the basics can be used by the enemy, did you already forget what Hunter-nin are all about, Sakura?" Naruto sighed deeply. He had liked her for a long, _long_ time, even now he felt something for her. However, the more he got to know her, the less he liked her, or at least _that_ way. She was far too unbending, adhered to the rules far too much. Her imagination was about as interesting as a salted slug and, for all her smarts, she really didn't think that fast, only complicated. In short; they were too different for him to continue to go after her. Not to mention she insulted his plants!

The fact that Naruto _might_ have sneaked into the women's onsen a few days before being sorted into teams and saw the other girls, _might_ have also helped his decision. Big might.

"Well, my dear cute genin, what are you waiting for? Try it out for yourselves!" Kakashi urged his students. It would be fun to see them fall and realize that it really wasn't as easy as it looked when you don't know how it works.

That did not happen. While Sakura held back, likely expecting instructions from her teacher, the boys didn't wait. They each took out a kunai and glanced at each other, the message in their eyes clear; _'First up wins-challenge accepted!'_ Then they gathered their chakra to their feet and charged. Each took several steps up the tree when the bark under Naruto exploded outwards while Sasuke's foot slipped. Both of them, in a creepily identical way, leapt back and away, tumbled through the air and landed on their feet.

Kakashi was impressed. They hadn't managed to go up, _nobody _did it the first time, but they had gone up further than he had expected. "Yes, it's _that_ simple. Channel a small amount of chakra to your feet and maintain it. As you saw, too little and you slip, too much and it blows up. Sakura, how about you try it?"

The pinkette looked somewhat indecisive but believing that a perceived shrug by her crush meant _'Go Sakura! Conquer this and prove your love to me!'_ she nodded determinedly and walked forward. Having a rough idea of how much chakra was needed, having seen her entire team succeed and fail at the endeavour, she gathered what she thought should be about enough and placed one foot on the tree. After making sure it was stuck well, she lifted the other and placed it on the bark. She adjusted the levels a bit, getting a feel for when she had too little or too much and soon she had it down pat. It was tiring her, of course, it had to be a high-level training after all, but she managed to climb up the tree on her first try.

_'Well, I'll be, she actually managed it on her first try. Doesn't surprise me really,her chakra levels are so low she has control to rival me. Compared to the boys however, she's not even a drop in an ocean.'_ Then he noticed the way Naruto looked at Sakura. _'That look, why don't I like that look? That's a bad,_ bad_ look!'_

"It sticks." Naruto said, next to Sasuke. "Her legs stick like glue."

"Well, _duh_, idiot, that's what we're doing. Kakashi did it too, remember?" The Uchiha snarked. Internally he was curious though. It was that look Naruto had every time he came up with a new, insane, idea. "Why, what's on your mind?"

"Chakra is adhesive? But... what if..." And Naruto kneeled in front of Sasuke to a large pile of leaves. He made a single half-ram seal and stuck the same hand's pointer and middle finger inside. When he pulled it out, a leaf had been stuck. There was another leaf stuck to the first one, and a third, a fourth and several more, making a chain.

"No. Way." Muttered Sasuke. The dobe, _the freaking dead-last!_, had managed to make something brand new out of an exercise he hasn't even completed! "What's this, Konoha Ninpou: Konoha Muchi (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Whip)?"

"No, I think I have to work it a bit more to make them go rigid, I was thinking a sword." Naruto nonchalantly responded, likely not really understanding just how abnormally rare it is to make a new technique on the drop of a hat.

Kakashi however was shocked for another reason. Naruto had enhanced a series of items by only focusing on a single of them, an 'aura enhancement' of sorts. _'How can he have the control to chakra-enhance a dozen leaves at once and still not be able to perform tree-walking?'_ He raged internally. Then, he realized it; Naruto had learned how to enhance multiple leaves due to his tampering with his skills and tricks all the time, nobody taught him how. He was self-taught. That meant that the boy had simply skipped several lessons. Naruto probably hadn't realized it when he did something other gennin his hadn't imagined of yet.

Damn, now he was feeling left behind, he could do that at his age too! Icha-Icha, wherefore art thou, Icha Icha? Take this lonely teacher into your generous bosom!

"Alright, Naruto, make a clone or a dozen to look into your leaf-sword-whatever idea, but get back to work yourself. You too, Sasuke. Neither of you boys want Sakura to leave you behind? After all, if you master Tree Walking, it makes it possible to learn any type of jutsu." Hook, line, sinker and pretty damn near the entire bay the fisherman was in. Both boys shook themselves, one made a dozen clones, and as one they charged their trees. Ignoring them, Kakashi effortlessly leapt to where Sakura was, scaring her as she hadn't thought it possible to leap that far in such a condition. Heh, poor girl, he had taken on samurai squads in worse condition. "As for you Sakura-chan, you are way too tired from just a simple hike. Do it a couple more times, it will help develop endurance."

The pinkette only mumbled something about how 'Sasuke-kun wouldn't like a butch woman' and grumbled all the way down and up before and sitting down next to the tree to watch 'her Sasuke-kun'.

It made Kakashi sigh, really. The girl was so smart, theoretically, but she was incapable of applying her knowledge and brains in practice. She just couldn't. She froze in danger, spoke loudly when silence was needed and she never really made an effort. At least Rin had been...

The jounin shook his head reminiscing about those times was forbidden. So, he instead leaned back on the tree and watched over his students. His barb about them being left behind by Sakura had quickly urged them to work harder than before to make up.

It was noon and the boys still hadn't gotten the hang of it, but Kakashi wasn't surprised. Even if Naruto had managed to do things with chakra he hadn't even realized he could, chakra reserves the size of Naruto's were always hard to control. The blonde would probably never manage a high-control jutsu in his life, but it wouldn't really matter, or so Kakashi hoped. Sasuke was doing better, but the rate of his development was slower than Naruto's and that made no sense. Could it be that the Uchiha was limiting himself until Naruto could surpass him, only to have a rival? No, it was different; these two, if Kakashi wasn't sure they were heterosexual, he would have worried about them. But even so he was worried; their troubled lives had made them connect with each other, form a bond much stronger than the one they had to their own home. If one of them deserted the village... the other _would_ follow.

Sakura on the other hand cared little for Naruto except for the fact that the blonde baka got way too much attention from 'her Sasuke-kun'. How dare he! He was just a no-name looser, the 'dead-last'! Even if he had gotten better, she couldn't deny that, he was still inferior to her! She was sure of it. After all, she was smarter and she had a family, she was better than him! But Sasuke-kun talked to that baka so much more than her that Sakura was worried; how did that useless dobe manage to get her Sasuke-kun's attention so completely? It was impossible! Sasuke-kun loved _her_ after all! Not once did the pinkette wonder that maybe, _just maybe_, the raven-haired gennin simply didn't care about her or that maybe everything that she knew of him wasn't close to the truth. Ignorance is bliss as they say, obviously portrayed by fangirls.

Sasuke on the other hand was far more accepting of the blonde. He had learned early on in his life that 'power equals respect'. No power means no respect, so he had had nothing of the sort for Naruto. Now however, the blonde improved faster and faster. He was no genius, he was a prodigy. Sasuke knew himself to be a genius in all ninja arts; be they genjutsu, ninjutsu or taijutsu, anything that was taught he swallowed it up. But not Naruto. The blonde didn't bother with 'traditional' methods, he made his own. Sasuke knew he was stronger than the blonde, even if they both developed fully, they would be equals and different only by their tactics. That's why he respected and accepted Naruto so much. Not only as someone who had suffered greatly yet only became stronger for it (if also a bit less sane), but also as someone who worked his ass off and actually became strong. What use is a weak rival after all? What use is a friend that does not relate to you? To Sasuke, the feeling of friendly competition and unreserved camaraderie was reminiscent of his family, in the best way possible. It healed his soul.

The same went for Naruto. In the utter darkness of his loneliness, he had found friends, more than friends; anchors to his sanity. Iruka-sensei and Jiji believed in him. Kakashi-sensei taught him. Sakura-chan was there to bring him back to earth when he went overboard. And Sasuke was just... _there_. He was there to remind Naruto that he was not alone in suffering, loneliness or even drive. What more could he ask for than a friend, rival and comrade all in one? So long as Sasuke was there, so would Naruto be there as well. And gods help any poor fool who tried to get between them. Now, if he could only take care of his pretties like they deserved to... How they must be sufering in the hands of a foreign cultivator, how could he ever conceive to know how to hug them and caress them and feed them properly, how to talk to them and listen to them?

The next few days went on like that, much to the anger and angst of Inari and annoyance of just about everybody else. The brat just didn't seem to realize that when life gives you lemons, you should make lemon-'n'-vodka and share a drink with her. Naruto and Sasuke were making good on their mutual challenge of who would master tree-walking first, often spending their downtime sparring to let their chakra recover. It wasn't such a problem for Naruto but Sasuke still ran out occasionally and just couldn't stand doing nothing while his blonde rival still trained. At least their sensei was always there to break up their fights if they got too serious and provide them both with excellent advice.

Unsurprisingly, Sakura did the absolute least of work, she preferred to oggle Sasuke, berate Naruto and occasionally (and under direct command) go up a tree or two. She had Sasuke-kun and Kakashi-sensei after all. It didn't matter how much Naruto or Kakashi tried to urge the girl to work harder, she only did so under Sasuke's 'Hn'-agreements and ever since she saw the desolate place that Wave Country had become. Something about the hopeless atmosphere urged the girl to try a little bit harder, it was a shock to her to see children beg for dregs of food.

In the end it sort of became a habit for the team to let Naruto and Sasuke practice until they came back. Both of them were so stubborn and hardheaded that they just couldn't handle defeat. They simply did not accept it unless they couldn't lift their tired and beaten bodies from the floor. Tsunami, Inari's mother, was at least kind enough to leave them a few plates of food for them to come eat whenever they were done with training. Naruto even told Sasuke he could use his fire-jutsu to heat up the plates, not as a combat technique but more to get a feel for free-form chakra manipulation, much like the blonde often did himself via lifting leaves and other items. Sasuke hadn't believed it to be very usefull, but he reneged on that belief when he suddenly belched out a small gout of fire during a heated taijutsu match, straight into his right hand. He had managed to burn off all the hair on his hand, but Kakashi had been fast enough with his water canteen that no further damage was dealt.

This was going to be one of their last night in peace, Kakashi had told his team. Near-death-states were hard to recover from, especially considering the beating the rogue had suffered (Kakashi didn't take too kindly to his team being threatened), but if the second ninja had such knowledge of accupuncture then he probably also knew how to treat wounds. Overall, it would take the man a week to recover, thankfully a little more than what Kakashi had needded. Though the legendary shinobi could have fought even with a single day of recovery, he would definitely not be able to face a ninja at Zabuza's level.

Sasuke and Naruto decided that enough was enough; they needed that training completed darn it! How dare it oppose them, Future Hokage and Uchiha Elite? Usually bother were quite humble, but this time they just _had_ to do it. They couldn't let their teacher down, nor each other. Annoyance that Sakura had gotten it down at her first try was also a factor. So, as they were wont to do... they trained and trained and trained until they got it right. Only to fall uncoscious approximately ten seconds after their victory as their adrenaline rush died out.

They awoke the next day to an unfamiliar presence, a girl dressed in a flowery kimono with a small wicker basket in hand, several herbs sticking out.

While Naruto didn't much react to a foreign presence so near to him, despite his harsh life he hadn't really developed the shinobi instinct of Constant Vigilance, Sasuke _did_ react by rolling away and palming a few kunai.

One would argue that tormenting someone about the death of their family made for a good training tool. That person would get violently dismembered by a certain Uchiha.

The girl seemed to reel back and away from the two gennin surprised and frightful. Understandable really. "O-Oh, I'm sorry, I was just... just worried you had caught a cold or something." She spoke hesitantly. Inwards she was also wondering about why the two were sleeping side-by-side. To her understanding, which granted did not amount to much, such closeness pointed to specific kinds of relationships.

Unfortunately for yaoi-fangirls, nothing of the sort went on between Naruto and Sasuke. However, the night was chilling and warmth was precious. Not to mention the fact that alone they could easily speak with each other without having to show anything but who they truly were; traumatized children struggling to maintain what little sanity they had left in a world so cold to them. Talking with someone who can understand you under a starlit sky can be very cathartic. Unfortunately, the over-active imaginations of people who never had the chance to go though something like this simply makes doing so 'forbidden'.

"Nah, we're fine! Thanks for waking us up though, we must really get back to training!" Naruto rambled in his characteristic manner. Sasuke just stretched out letting a 'Hn' escape him.

"Train? Whatever for?" The girl asked.

"Well, we're ninja, shinobi, you know? So we have to train to become stronger and stronger, right Sasuke?"

"Hnn."

"He said 'yeah', don't worry, after a few months you could decode his words too. He's just shy." Naruto's barb obviously managed to draw attention from the raven-haired boy and he returned a violent 'I'm not shy, dobe!', making the girl giggle.

"You two are funny." She giggled some more. "But... do you have a special reason to get stronger? People become truly strong when they defend their precious people. Do you have someone like that?" She asked, head tilted to the side, innocence rolling off her in waves.

"Hn. No." Sasuke replied, looking away. His 'dear' brother had seen to that.

"Aww, don't be like that teme. You _do_ have precious people, you have me and Kakashi-sensei, and Sakura if she ever got serious too! A team's like a family you know?"

"Then what are you, the idiot uncle?" The snark wasn't at all hostile really.

"Nah, I'd prefer 'that-crazy-old-bat-of-a-gardener-with-killer-ninja-moves-that-far-surpass-everyone-else-and-is-worshipped-by-women'!" Naruto hyphenated his own name.

Of course, Sasuke couldn't let that chance at some banter pass him by. "How about the-idiot-that-everybody-is-ashamed-of? Much closer to reality, dobe."

Further disagreement was interrupted by further giggling from the girl. "You two seem to be getting along pretty well. Are you... _each other's precious person_?" She asked, looking at them strangely.

"Each other's precious per-OH GOD NO!" Naruto screamed and went to the side, dry heaving. "No, just no, NO!" Similar sounds were copied by the other boy. "Where did you get_ that_ idea from? Gods above, I need brain bleach!"

Sasuke could have made many pointy remarks about Naruto at that moment, but he was much more preoccupied with trying to with-hold his own rebelling stomach. Brain bleach indeed.

"Oh!" The girl realized she had misread their circumstances. The place _was_ rather chilly at night, well for most people anyway. "I'm so sorry! I just... you were... really close and..."

"Yeah" Naruto spat some bile off his tongue. "but it gets rather cold at night, couldn't walk back home, we had ran out of fumes to run on. But, sheesh nee-chan, next time keep those dreams to yourself, _please_!"

The girl got up, still giggling demurely, hand before her mouth. "Oh my, look at the time, I must have been out for longer than I thought. I really have to get back now, I have to treat my uncle."

"Why, he's hurt? Did Gatou and his scum threaten you?" Naruto fixed her with a concerned look. "You can come with us you know, we could probably provide with some extra medication too."

"No, no, it's alright!" The girl hastily denied the offer. "I-it's nothing important, just a cold from fishing after hours, these herbs should have him back on his feet in no time." Then the girl turned to leave and, just as Sasuke was getting ready to ask her something, she turned back and winked at them. "By the way, my name is Haku and I'm a boy."

"B-boy?" Naruto whispered disbelievingly. "No _way_ I'm buying that, that person's cuter than Sakura, almost on par with Ino!"

"Ino isn't cute; she's an early bloomer, baka." Sasuke disagreed. "In fact she's just a pushy know-it-all that doesn't know all that much really. And the screeches... gods, she has probably damaged my ears, I know Kiba has had to go to the hospital thanks to her."

"Yeah, but still... such cuteness..."

"Whatever, you noticed it, right?" Sasuke focused back on the track the girl had been on, she had disappeared in mere seconds.

"Yeah, she lied. I know how lightly you sleep and she got so close. She didn't freak out as much when she saw your knives or when we told her we're ninja. And also, these plants, they're not for diseases. They treat blood-pressure and chemical imbalances."

"Don't forget she refused our offer of help; in a place like this, no one would refuse extra help or medication. But, the question is, why did she stay and talk? Why didn't she use a long-range techique? Why didn't she try to attack us? Something's wrong here." Sasuke had been groomed to become a member of the Police Force from a young age. His mind was already working overtime to figure out these clues. "It's like she wanted to... tell us something? About precious people... maybe she's being pressured to work for someone? But who... Blood pressure treatment and chemical imbalances..." He hummed. "Being put to a near-death state would definitely mess up the body, at least for a time. She wasn't treating her uncle... she's helping Zabuza!"

"Are you telling me we just let Zabuza's accomplice walk away? Oh _man_..." Naruto whined, clearly not liking it. With good reason too; if they had taken her out, Zabuza would be much easier to deal with.

"No, she probably let _us_ go... If she's Zabuza's accomplice, she definitely know how to take us down, both from stealth and out of it. But why, it makes no sense! Unless... could Zabuza have some sort of leverage over her, some loved one, a '_precious person_'? That would explain what she told us... but still, I think something's missing, like she _wants_ us to win, but not... not in just _any_ way, but a very specific one. I can't make heads or tails of it..."

"Well, if _you_ can't figure it out, I'm not even going to bother about it. I just think it's a bit simpler than that. I think we should go back though, we _did_ manage our chakra control test, so we should be clear. Maybe he'll get us a new training or something."

"Riiight" Sasuke drawled. "And you want fries with that? That guy probably only taught us because he was too tired to turn pages on his Icha Icha."

"I wouldn't say no to fries, but I would most definitely prefer ramen." A gurgling, almost roaring, sound from Naruto punctuated that sentence, soon followed by a similar from Sasuke.

The two boys ended up walking back hungry and discussing about food. Or, well, Naruto did anyway.

After a fulfilling breakfast, courtesy of Tsunami, and a rather long rant about staying outside after hours, again courtesy of Tsunami, Naruto and Sasuke were rather glad to be away from the gentle _courtesies_ of the woman; she may be a civilian, but she was a civilian **mama** and that made her bloody _scary_. Not even Kakashi managed to escape her ranting, especially his irresponcible nature and laid-back attitude, letting two innocent little boys wander off into the wilderness...

Ahem, back to what's important;

"So you're saying you met someone who could be an accomplice of Zabuza, had a friendly talk and he-she-it went on their merry way, is that what you're telling me?"

"A-yup." Naruto nodded. "Though, keep in mind, that person also had herbs that could help with Zabuza being healed. That means he-she is also a medic, so he could be ready to fight again soon. The various herbal teas I made you should have helped a bit, but I'm no medic, I just mixed-and-matched." Yes, yes he had. Taking random herbs he had made various teas for his teacher... Said teacher didn't drink one of them. He trusted the boy, but sometimes Naruto wasn't exactly the most predictable person.

Case in point now; "She said something about precious people though... wonder if she'd like my pretties. My pretties would like her, they're very cuddly sort of plants. Would you like to be adopted by one of my pretties, Kakashi-sensei? You'd have to take good care of her though, or she'd have to scold you! They are very sensitive, my precious pretties!"

"Errr..." Now what could he say to this? The hopeful look in the blonde's eyes was heart-wrenching! How he could manage to pout like that while being thirteen years old, Kakashi would never know. "I... I'd rather not. I don't know how to best take care of... of your pretties. Wouldn't want them hurt now, would we?"

"No, no, we wouldn't. She would throw a tantrum and that just won't do." Naruto shivered.

"Either way, today you should stay here. Don't think I can't tell when a student's worn his chakra raw. Sasuke may have less endurance but he isn't nearly as wiped as you."

"Are you telling me I'm confined to _bed rest_?" Naruto was near apoplexic. Had he not proven that he was equal to everyone?

"Today only. It's just a problem with people that have naturally high chakra. Until you mature, there is a limit at how much chakra you can use in a day. It's not about how much you have, rather how much you wear out your circulation system. Think of it like friction burns; you use it more than everybody else, so you get burned. Sasuke doesn't, since he doesn't have anywhere near your amount of chakra, so he doesn't get burned, he gets a little raw though. When you mature, in a few more years, you won't have that problem. It's nothing bad, trust me, but if you channel too much chakra today, it's going to hurt like hell." Kakashi rubbed the back of his head with his hand. He was talking from experience. "Besides, someone has to watch Tsunami and Inari, you know. Starting tomorrow we'll have normal shifts of two, alright? I'm not telling you to stay in your bed, just to let your body recover."

"Aww man..." Naruto whined. "Alright, I get it. But I better have something exciting tomorrow!"

"Well, we'll see. Tomorrow you can help around the house if you want. The garden needs some looking after and I think your clones would be a great help. But today, just stay here and rest."

In mere moments Team 7 had left the building, off to the bridge, leaving only their blonde teammate behind with their secondary wards.

Sitting in the garden, hands idly stroking the sole rose plant in there, Naruto looked out. Something was off about the he-she they had met today. For just a moment, he thought he had seen an endless loneliness and sorrow in those dark brown eyes.

Almost like what he had, a long time ago, before his pretties.

There was also the herbs. They were not the strongest-acting variety, but they were rather fast acting. Why go for greater recovery rate at the cost of less total recovery? Like poisons; one could use a fast acting one that caused nothing worse than dizziness, or they could go for a slower acting one that could do much worse, be it blindness or even death. So, why use the weaker effect? Unless...

_'Oh..._shit_...'_ He thought. Using the weakest herb meant very little if you had already mostly recovered!

Before he could leave the house however, there was a crash and a scream, a woman's scream. Letting go of the plant, Naruto dashed back home, worried that maybe Tsunami had slipped or something.

He wasn't that lucky; two sword-bearing men, covered in ugly tattoos to disguise their even uglier scars, held her at sword point, sneering and leering, obviously threatening her.

If there was a list of things that Naruto could not forgive, rape and murder were within the top-five, easily. And he knew that look in their eyes. They were going for it; both of the sins.

When one of them grabbed Tsunami's chest roughly, Naruto broke free of his hate-induced daze and acted. Chakra gathered at his feet, and cursing himself for the pain he was about to feel, he dashed forward, almost too fast for a human eye to see. The punch that followed was very satisfying for the gennin, the sound of broken bone was gross but also kind of nice. But maybe that was his hate talking, because his enemy certainly would be unable to speak for a long time, his lower jaw had been _shattered_.

_'Note to self; attack strength is proportionate to the speed of the blow as well as the size of impact. Must research further, especially with Kawarimi.'_

He didn't have much time to think though as he quickly lashed out with another blow at the other swordsman, this one at an even worse state than his comrade as he was caught with sword still sheathed. It would remain so if Naruto had a choice. The blonde quickly bobbed and weaved closer to the enemy, copying another gennin that fought only with his fists, and quickly sent out a five-hit combo that ended with a vicious uppercut. Then, before the guy had time to recover, Naruto spun on his heel and gave him a vicious mule kick at the gut.

Sure, it wasn't as coordinated or effective as Sasuke's style, but it got the job done.

With both men down, Naruto quickly turned to the distraught woman he had just saved, _damn he was gooood!_, comforting her son, who had been seconds from charging to his certain death to protect her.

Deciding that the boy's attention would be much better for the woman, Naruto turned to his defeated opponents. A quick search and a length of rope later and the place was safe.

"Tsunami-san, I have to go. These guys are accomplices of Zabuza and Gatou. My team will need all the help it can get. You should go to a friend's house and barricade yourself. If... if we fail, be ready to run." Then he dashed up to his room, he needed to get some extra weaponry. Zabuza would not underestimate them this time, and there was that second ninja to contend with as well.

The wind wheezed past Naruto's ears as he ran. He had to move fast to get to the bridge in time. Sasuke was strong and so was Kakashi, but the enemy was stronger still; Zabuza was on Kakashi's level and his aide may be beyond even that. At least his chakra hadn't hurt him yet; seems that the damn demon's presence helped in more than reserves. It still felt weird and 'raw', as if scratching on a bruise, when going over a small amount, but he could take it. He has taken far more pain before, after all.

On the target location however, none were as calm. Zabuza knew that Kakashi was on a level above that affected by fortunate circumstances; he had been underestimated before, it would not happen again. Sakura and Tazuna were scared out of their wits, knowing (or assuming) the strength of the other fighters in the area. The Hunter in the mask was hesitating, there were people like him, lonely like him, strong like him, in this place, could he bring himself to kill them? Could he become a true shinobi, a person that tails after Death?

Surrounded by icy mirrors that held his enemy no matter where he looked, Sasuke was just as troubled, only more worried. This was bad. This was _really_ bad. He had fallen right into his enemy's trap, right into a jutsu he could not break out of. The 'demonic ice mirrors' as the fake-hunter had called them were immune to his weapons, his katon jutsu and his own kicks. What was he to do?

A memory came to his mind:

_~Flashback~_

_"So, you noticed how overloading your chakra levels at the feet makes the tree blow up, right?" Said Naruto in one of their downtimes._

_"Yeah, it's why it's called 'training' when you learn to not do that. Why? Thought of a new jutsu?"_

_"Of course, impacting leaves or something to that extent. But no, I was thinking... Tsunade of the Sannin is considered to be extremely strong right? But you never hear about her grappling, only her striking. So I was thinking..."_

_"She took that chakra control excercise and turned it into a fighting style? That's... that's crazy, but using leaves to chop people is even worse... what are you thinking?" Sasuke was now interested. If he could mimic such a technique..._

_"Well... I was thinking of building a charge, a lump of chakra, right at the edge of your impact area and then exploding it. More charge time is more chakra is more of an impact."_

_"Yeah, but doing so would require extreme chakra control to get the proper timing."_

_"Unless... well, your Sharingan gives you a visual on where you will strike, and when. And it also gives you a visual indication on where the chakra 'lump' is. If you were to combine knowing how long it takes to channel the lump and knowing when you will strike..."_

_"You turn it from an excercise in chakra control to a matter of reflexes!"_

_"Exactly. Of course, it's not _that_ simple. You get kicked away from the tree too, so there is some backlash. You must never channel more chakra than you can handle, which makes this technique dependant on your own strength. Tsunade-sama probably has worked a way around this but... for now, I guess it'd do to get a good hit in. Probably doesn't work with ninja tools though."_

_"And I'd have to wait for my Sharingan to awaken before using it. Damn, Naruto, never thought that _you_ of all people would figure that trick out!"_

_"What can I say? I live to impress!" Naruto laughed._

_~End Flashback~_

Well, he didn't have his Sharingan yet, but he wasn't about to drop dead either, not until he had exhausted himself doing his darndest.

In a desperate run, he dashed to the closest mirror to him, left hand raised above his head for a straight punch. Gods above, he hoped he was doing this right.

The thump-like sound told him his punch had landed just about when he felt the pain of smashing full-stregth on an unyielding surface. He had missed the timing, too late. Hopefully, it wouldn't be too log no-

A loud crashing noise made Haku double-take. Haku's mirrors had never been broken before, even Zabuza-sama didn't break them (that's how he'd train her, breaking them, and her, until she made them strong enough)! How?

For his part Sasuke cried out in pain as he felt the wave of pain run all the way up and down his entire arm, even his shoulder. He got now why Naruto had said to not overload the technique; he was just glad it wasn't his right hand that he'd broken!

But he was free! So, with narry a thought, he dashed forward, hopefully somewhere away from all that water, somewhere he would get the advantage.

He didn't get very far; Haku recovered quickly and fired several senbon at his legs, causing him to fall over. Despite her tired state, she had been taught under Zabuza; she had won harder fights in worse conditions.

Then again, she was lucky that punch hadn't struck the mirror she was in.

Sasuke growled at his pursuer. Dammit, he couldn't even see her! He, an _Uchiha_! It wasn't just about being an elite, it was about him being an Uchiha. His clan had the best eyesight possible (the Hyuga were just imitators), how could he _not see_? It was insulting! And besides, these 'weapons', what the hell, wasn't he being underestimated here? Sure the guy, gal, whoever it was behind that mask (too thin a frame to be male, too masculine movements to be a female), was dead accurate with them, but why wasn't there a more dangerous weapon, like a kunai. Hell, shuriken were more lethal.

It felt like his enemy was sparing him, and that was something that Sasuke could not accept. His pride couldn't. In one way, he was glad Naruto was Naruto; he'd gotten used to being irritated to near-explosion levels, or he'd have just charged at his enemy frothing at the mouth otherwise.

And speaking of a certain knuckle-headed blonde, there he was, charging at the mirror dome.

Wait, what?

"**Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu**!" And then it was raining Narutos.

The fake-hunter replied by sending out salvos upon salvos of senbon. That most definitely destroyed the clones (Sasuke didn't even want to know how much chakra Naruto wasted right there), which in turn created enough smoke to blind everything. It was hopeless of course, getting away from the ninja, he was trained to fight in such conditions, but it was their best bet. Quickly, Sasuke removed the senbon in his feet, biting back the pain and using it to strengthen his resolve.

Kunai flew from all around Sasuke like a hail, apparently the 'dobe' could really back up his claims of thousand-clone armies, impacting the mirrors without effect. Behind the glacial wall, Haku was worried however. Haku was quite well aware that he possessed very little chakra compared to other shinobi, it was only by virtue of exceptional control that he was able to do so much. However, the Ice Mirrors were heavily draining, most enemies simply didn't live long enough while trapped within. But this time? This time, Haku's enemies were the worst possible match if the the blonde's clones were to be taken into account.

"Naruto, gimme some cover!" Sasuke yelled and leapt back under the cover of a clone-smokebomb. He didn't have much time and only so much ninja wire. Thankfully, Naruto had taken some of the extra supplies he had back at Tazuna's home. Tieing as much as he could on as many kunai, real, not cloned, he gave them to Naruto's clones. They would serve as 'tracers', maybe he could get some form of hint on how to beat Haku's technique.

Then, the raven-haired boy squatted down and squinted as he paid as much attention as he could, going over all the facts he had acquired. Firstly, his enemy didn't stay inside the mirrors for long. Apparently, whatever skill he had for creating ice did not extent to weathering such cold for too long. Secondly, every time his enemy attacked, he removed himself completely from the mirrors, that meant that his movement was rather limited while inside the safety area. The two combined told Sasuke that the hunter-nin didn't use a straight-forward jutsu, but rather one that affected dimensions as well, by affecting space he could affect time, so that's why he became so fast. Also, the masked ninja could only move from one mirror to another, presumably, if he were to not enter a mirror, his speed boost would break, if he even was capable of doing so. Last but not least; the ninjutsu also increased reaction time, they could not hope to land a blow as it would be detected and diverted, unless they could _predict_ what would happen.

All in all, despite the weaknesses of that jutsu, it was still one major pain in the ass, and they were quite probably screwed if he didn't get the guy's pattern figured out soon.

Which was exactly what the 'tracers' had been for. If he could hold the taut strings of the kunai in his hands, he could maybe find some weakpoint, some way to predict it.

It only took him a few seconds to realize that was futile; the hunter-nin could choose to move to any mirror he had visual to. He was not restricted, he had no discernable pattern.

But, as he strained, both mind and body, he also strained his chakra. He had heard from Kiba that his kekkei-genkai (if it was one truly) depended on channeling chakra to specific points and controlling it. Sasuke's kekkei-genkai, the revered sharingan, resided in the eyes, coincidentally in the same body part he needed to work as best as he could.

So, between the flurry of senbons, the smoke of dispelled clones, the reflections of ninja wires and the blue haze of chakra, Sasuke began to see _something_. It was indistinct and _so damn fast_, no more than a large shadow leaping around.

But the shadow's movements were soon followed by tugs in the wires he held in his hands.

_'Left, right, no left again, up and left, to the side, below up-'_

The shadow went and Sasuke followed it as fast as he could, his eyes jumping from mirror to mirror.

_'-down, right, right, left, up left, down right, right, up, I can see, I can _see_ it!'_

He quickly retrieve his best kunai, a longer-than-normal pair, a birthday gift from _him_. Then he was off, remembering to push all the chakra he could into his legs, moving faster than he ever had.

Sasuke never noticed he left a small crater at his starting point.

Naruto might have been surprised by Sasuke's sudden charge, but he didn't let it stop him, he showered the area with more shuriken than ever, hoping to pin the rogue ninja in a mirror.

Haku might not have been pinned, he was too fast for that, but he sure as hell was surprised when he suddenly found himself nose-to-mask with Sasuke, his hands straining to hold the knives back with just his senbon.

"W-What? How?" He could not resist asking, not even Zabuza-sama could do this!

Sasuke only raised his head to pin the eyes behind the faceless mask, smirking. "I can seeee youuuu~" He mocked in the semi-childish tone he knew would infuriate his enemy.

Haku cursed, just his luck. Leaping back, he melted into a mirror. "An Uchiha, a survivor of that tragic clan... I see, no wonder I couldn't defeat you. Is your friend from another so famous a clan?" When it all fails... parley.

A scoff was his return. "Naruto? The dobe wouldn't have such luck. No, he's just your average ninja, no clan backing him. But, you see, Naruto has earned my respect. If you know of Uchiha, you do realize how rare it is to give our respect to a clanless, right?" He allowed his smirk to widen. Oh yeah, feel the burn, bitch! Feel the fear! Sasuke was quite pleased to note the minute widening of the eyes, the ninja was now realizing that he was horribly outmatched. That would lead to mistakes which he could then use to bring this fight to a victorious end.

Unfortunately, Sasuke forgot that when people are pushed to the wall, they retaliate, often in an unpredictable way.

He was quite surprised to find a clone try to smother him from behind while the masked ninja fled right past him. Belatedly, he also realized that to move so fast meant that there was a mirror on his rear too.

Sasuke's knives flased quickly and disposed of the clone, turning around to block the incoming attack.

Only, there was no attack heading towards Sasuke. There was only an enemy heading towards _Naruto_. And the blonde couldn't even see him.

Mirrors appeared in front of Haku, made to last only for a second as he practically flew towards the blonde. He had to be removed if he wanted to have a chance to beat the other one. Interference, even for a second, would be lethal against an Uchiha. Then a mirror materialized to Naruto's side and he threw his senbon as he pirrouetted over the boy.

Naruto turned to the side, only having barely caught the forming mirror's reflection, to realize had just been had. No clones to defend him and he was going down.

Time seemed to still for him, almost mocking him by finally letting him see the sleek thrown weapons.

Then his field turned black and he realized it was hair. Familiar hair.

A body seemed to shudder once, twice, as the senbon impacted and then fall back on him.

"S-Sasuke?"

"H-hey dobe." Sasuke's voice was weak, almost sleepy. "Fancy that, me saving your skin... How pathetic is that?" He seemed to exhale softly and then just looked at the sky. "Don't die, live for me too... Naru...to..."

Then he wasn't moving anymore.

_He wasn't moving any more!_

"Sasuke?" Naruto shook his friend once, twice and repeated the call. "C-come on man, this... this is nothing, just a pair of needles, you've had worse before, right? You can't die from that, you can't... Sasuke... You... you can't die... you can't leave me alone..."

"Was he your friend? Was he a dear friend? Was this the first time you watched someone die?" Haku taunted. At least the greatest obstacle had been removed. Now, if he could infuriate the blonde into loosing control of his technique... "It's a cruel world, people die all the time. He died... because he wasn't strong enough. Because of his weakness-"

**"Shut. Up."** It was only whispered, but it resounded in Haku's ears as if someone had shouted it. **"Shut... the fuck... up..."** A weird chakra was now escaping the blonde. If Haku had to put it to words, if he had blue before, now he had blood-red. The aliteration did not escape the now-gulping ninja. **"He was my friend... He understood me... You took him from me... I... I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!"** It felt like an explosion, only without the concussive force.

But with all the heat, the scorching heat that seemed to melt the ice and evaporate the water.

Haku fliched once more as he realized that the heat was merely a side-effect of the blonde's sheer, _unearthly_, rage.

Then, with no warning, Haku felt his eyes widen in terror and surprise alike as Sasuke was not supported by hands any more.

And there was a glowing fist heading towards his head, that too.

Poor Haku found himself akin to an out-of-body experience as he was sent flying back by a punch that broke his mirror, his hands and quite possibly his sternum. He felt almost detached from his body as the world flipped around him several times over.

Then the pain hit and it was only thanks to Zabuza's and the Hunter-nin Corps training that allowed him to not scream in pain.

The subsequent blows, all delivered as if the blonde was slashing, however, sent Haku far beyond his admirable pain tolerance level.

It was almost a relief when Naruto had pounced onto his broken body, much like a predator would, and pinned him down. And yet,a there was not nearly as much animalistic fury behind those red, slit eyes, as there was an endless pain, an abysmal loneliness, a look that Haku knew all _too_ well.

"Go ahead. Kill me. You have won. I am of no more use to my master." It was not only that he had failed Zabuza. It was the realization of what he had done to someone who had been so similar to himself.

He had just taken someone else's precious person. Haku didn't want to live if he were to subject someone else to the same pain he had been drowning in. It would make him no better than his _father_.

Haku closed his eyes as he saw the blonde's raised fist, glowing with so much power he was glad he was no sensor; it would have probably blinded him. Then it came down.

**"Why?"** Haku was quite surprised to find himself alive. **"Why kill him? What gave you the right?"** Then there was the welcome feeling of breathing as the boy's knee was taken off his lungs. Still hurt like hell though.

"You... aren't killing me?"

**"He is... dead...**" The vile, crimson chakra was retreating now. "There is... there is just no point... You can't hurt us any more..."

It was true; the blows had jarred Haku, he could barely raise his arms to defend himself or even draw breath, his chakra was also dangerously low. Even his Hunter-nin mask had been destroyed sometime into the short altecration. It didn't surprse Haku nearly as much as it should, considering they had been made to be tougher than steel. So, the defeated ninja sat down and awaited his judgement. Regardless of who of the two warring jounin won, his life as a tool, a bad life but the only one he had, would be over.

The mists cleared.

Off to the side, Sakura was shaking, kunai in hand and terror in her eyes, in front of a just-as-terrified Tazuna.

Beyond them, another pair facing each other, one kneeling and the other slouching forward. The shadowy shape of the legendary cleaver sword lay in their middle.

Kakashi sighed as he pulled his headband back up. It was finally over. He'd probably get a few nightmares, but it would be worth it to protect his brats.

Zabuza had been defeated from the moment he threatened to dismember his three gennin apart after beating him. It had just taken the missing-nin a little bit to realize his folly.

"It's over Zabuza. No hands, no weapon and barely a bit of chakra. You've lost." He stated. "I'd let you go, really, but I can't. Your actions, bringing ruin to a whole country just for your desire for money, threatening my client, and worse, threatening my gennin, I have to stop you."

The bloodied shinobi barked out a laugh. "Then do it, Copy-nin! Don't bore me with your morality speeches. If that trash, Haku, had at least been a little bit worth my time, I'd have killed you, but it seems I chose the wrong tool to follow me out of Mizugakure." He spat, glaring at the heartbroken Haku. "You pathetic brat, you can't even do one thing right. I bet you didn't even kill that blue-haired bastard over there, did you?" He spat out. "You're just a weak, worthless little shit."

He would have said more had Naruto not dashed and punched him in the face, sending the missing ninja rolling on the floor. "HOW DARE YOU!" He screamed at him, crimson chakra once again awakening. "Haku is stronger than you ever thought! Haku gave everything he has to you, and that's how you repay his loyalty, his _kindness_? If _you_ are what is a true shinobi, then I'd rather be a civilian, rather than a coward like you, who hides from his own emotions." He took a deep breath. "I'd rather be a weakling rather than a pathetic fool who doesn't realize when he hurts his precious people."

"Shut up brat..." There was something different about Zabuza this time, something in the way he stood. He seemed startled for a second as if he heard something, then sighed. "Well, seems like you wanted to double-cross me from the begining, eh, Gatou?"

The mist finally cleared to reveal a midged in front of several hundred merceneries. The suit easily identified him as their boss. "Well, at least you have enough brains to realize that, don't you, Zabuza-chan?" He mocked, striking the ground with his cane. "It's more cost-efficient to hire a ninja, have him kill my enemies and then hire a thousand merceneries to kill him. It's even better in your case, I'll get your bounty too!" He laughed. "No had feelings, eh Zabuza? It's just business."

But the Demon of the Mist wasn't so easily defeated.

No, he _was_ defeated, just not physically. That boy's words had cut into him deeper than any blade.

Since when had he been with Haku? _When had he not been with Haku?_

So long, so long they had been together, fighting, surviving, eeking a miserable existence made bearable only by their mutual companionship.

His rage simmered.

"So, I was thinking, that brat of yours, he'll make a good example, won't he? Breaking my arm, the bastard, I'll break _him_!"

Now his rage boiled over.

"Hehehehe..." Zabuza chuckled, it was so funny! So exhilarating! He knew he shouldn't be feeling it, but his rage, his fury, it made his adrenaline come short, it made endorphins explode within him, mix in an addictive, heady drug that brought a blood-red haze to his eyes. Tossing his head back, he laughed. "HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Then came his KI, his killing intent, the absolute, complete desire to _maim-kill-destroy-dismember-drinktheirblood-batheintheirentrails_.

It settled on their shoulders like a boulder, making them almost kneel in abject terror.

Kakashi's eye widened. Zabuza was like him. He, too, had another self, locked away, the true 'Kishin', the true 'Demon'.

And now, that pudgy little midget had just awakened _it._ The only think he could think was _'fuck'_.

Then, Zabuza was off, charging head first, no chakra or weapons or even his hands to help him. Just that insane, consuming bloodlust that froze almost a thousand men.

It did not stop a jinchuuriki, nor that man's defeated accomplice. It took Haku's remaining chakra, but she threw her master a weapon, a nice, solid, ice katana, just so he could grab it with his teeth. Then, Haku knew no more, having lost consciousness.

Unconsciousness was the farthest thing to Naruto's mind. The Kyuubi's power surged within him. He could feel its hate, he could feel its wrath, and he felt the same. Unable to contain himself, he knew he would explode unless he were to burn that chakra off.

**"TAJUU KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!** (Mass Shadow Clone Technique)**"** The Kyubi-powered technique burst outwards like a wave of smoke, obscuring everything, expanding and expanding until it covered half the bridge.

Then a gust of wind cleared the smoke and Kakashi had to thank his mask for not letting his jaw hit the floor.

There were clones. Everywhere. On the floor, on the rails, on the side of supporting beams, on the side of the bridge, he was sure that some were hanging from under it too!

When they took their kunai out, Kakashi knew it would be a massacre. But he also knew it would traumatize his student. So, with a weary sigh, he let out _him_.

It felt so familiar, as if they hadn't been separated for a day. His nostrils flared and the metallic scent of blood made him grin. He breathed it deeply and the world seemed to spin into focus, finally he could see! He could feel! The world itself had finally, _finally come alive_!

Hatake Kakashi, former ANBU captain, jounin and laid-back pervert took the back seat as he allowed his alter ego, 'Shi, ANBU captain, assassin and general bloodthirsty badass take control.

Then he vanished in a blur, appearing in front of Zabuza, his hands already snapping two necks. When someone tried to stab him, he seemed to flow without bones or even purpose, as if he had stumbled. It would have been funny if not for the two kunai that slit four throats each.

Then came the rain of steel and Kakashi began dancing. Kicking and punching and parrying the thrown weapons, he redirected them to the many mercenaries almost as easily as a one could breathe.

The Hatake Kakashi inside him was just happy that his student had avoided lethal spots completely, he would have almost mistook it for bad aim if it were not for the sheer amount of thrown weapons. It seemed Naruto wouldn't become a killer this day.

Zabuza on the other hand? Oh, the nuke-nin rejoiced in the bloodbath. His maniacal laughter would haunt the dreams of many, his pure-white blade now stained with so much blood that it must have seeped deep inside the crystal.

Then the man was in front of Gatou. His form, bared nacked from the waist and up, towered over the other one. There were few constrasts as sharp as this one. In one hand, a murderer, a born killer, a demon, tall and strong and proud. In the other hand, a murderer, a weak, pathetic life-form, coward amongst cowards, whose only power wasn't even his own.

Zabuza's foot caught Gatou on the chin and lifted him in the air. Then, a sword pierced him through the kidneys and another one through the lungs. One by one, Zabuza struck all the most painful spots of the body before letting the screaming businessman fall to the ground, bleeding and pleading. Finally, a kick and he had shoved him off the bridge they had both worked to destroy.

Most of the onlooking thugs, those not screaming in pain or trying to evade Kakashi as best as their limited skill allowed, stared at the blood-spattered demon. Zabuza only smirked at them, and that was just as scary as if he was attacking them. "Well? COME GET ME!" He screamed at them.

Of course, no one would take his invitation, they were definitely not _that_ suicidal or stupid. So, their shoes filled with 'liquid fear', screaming like the women they so liked to torture, they ran off the bridge, leaping onto the waiting boat transport, or into the water when they couldn't fit.

But even those that got on the boat wouldn't go to far, the people of Wave had finally found their courage and had assembled on their own boatcraft and already surrounding the miscreants. It would seem Wave's prisons would be full for a long time.

It was about that time that, released from the paralyzing fear of Zabuza's aura, Sakura realized she hadn't seen Sasuke anywhere. Of course, she could care less about Naruto, who, despite his rapid growth lately she still considered inferior to her as he was a parentless nobody, but her heart was fanatically, even obsessively, devoted to the sole Uchiha heir of Konoha. "Oi, Naruto-baka, where is Sasuke-kun?" She screamed at him, after all, Sasuke-kun would be far more useful in the fight against Zabuza, why would he have stayed back to guard the masked ninja prisoner?

It was only the despair she saw in Naruto's eyes that hinted to her that something might be wrong. It was only the sight of the prone body laying further away towards the shore, surrounded by many of the people of way, most of them with bowed heads, that told her what was going on. Ignoring all protocol, and most sanity, Sakura ran off to her downed crush and fell to the ground sobbing. She couldn't believe it, he was dead, _dead_, _deadeadeadeadeadeadead_, and there was nothing she could do about it. So, sobbing, she fell onto his chest.

Or would have anyway, as the missing-nin, who had managed to come around a few moments ago, grabbed her hands and pushed her off the boy.

"You!" Sakura screamed at her enemy. "You killed him! You!" She was never that good with insults or banter, Ino always beat her at that, but she made up with more than enough zealotry. Only, zealotry didn't really help her free her hands from the vice-like grip the prisoner had.

"Stop it. You'll aggravate the wounds." There was an infuriating smile on his, _her?_, face, closed eyes and all. "I don't think Uchiha-kun would appreciate my senbon going any deeper than they already are."

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU BASTARD! YOU KILLED HIM!" She shouted, or more liked screeched.

Then she stopped struggling as an 'unf' sound came from below her hands and a familiar voice complained. "God, why doesn't the screeching stop... last time I go drinking with that dobe..."

"See? I only knocked him unconscious."

"SASUKE-KUUUN!" Now she was crying again, but 'happy-tears' as she would say.

"Oof! Sakura! Get off me, dammit!"

"T-Teme?" Naruto's voice reached the Uchiha. "You're... alive?"

"Hn, rumours of my demise were grossly exaggerated... ouch, Sakura! Watch your hands dammit!" He scowled at the pinkette that hurt him more than helped him. "Haku, could you _please_ get these needles off me?"

But Haku didn't have time to do that as a large shadow fell over her, cast by the equally large shadow of Zabuza being carried fireman-style by Kakashi. The missing ninja simply sloughed to the ground next to his former apprentice. "Oi, Haku, before tending to the enemy, make sure your own team's covered."

Haku's own eyes were glacial as they bore into Zabuza's own, belying the rage the former tool felt. "That's what I'm doing, Zabuza-_sama_." And Haku's hands pulled out a needle from Sasuke's body, ignoring his indignant cries of pain and surprise.

"Yeah... about that... I'm... I'm sorry, Haku." He seemed mightily uncomfortable with his admission.

Frankly, he seemed even more uncomfortable when he looked at Haku's face who seemed to have changed to better project the teary, large, doe-like eyes his apprentice had. "Zabuza-samaaa!" And then, he experienced his maybe third hug in his life.

A dozen things passed through his mind to say at that moment, but in the end he settled for an indignant "Ouch! Easier on the ribs, Haku! I always knew you were more of a demon than me!"

Of course that only produced much laughter from the three males of Team 7, leaving Sakura outside of their private world of insanity.

The battle was over and they had survived. All was good.

**A/N: Yet another chapter by yours truly****, though it was my hardest one yet****. Hope you enjoyed it and want to adopt it.**

**I'm getting irritating with the whole adoption thing, I know, but having so many fics can be... hard on me. Especially since I haven't completed a single one of them (one-shots and such not taken into account).**

**Also, here's a question, of sorts. I'm trying to find a taijutsu style for Naruto, I came up with a Wuxia/Wu Shu combination focused on kicks and acrobatics to allow for quick movement and free the hands for hadseals (he's a ninjutsu specialist after all). Sasuke could go for Goken, Uchiha Interceptor (or whatever his family's style is called), Naruto's style and use twin knives to get up close and personal (melee combat using a large amount of ninjutsu and genjutsu to supplement, his sharingan-based reflexes make him an excellent close quarters combatant). Sakura will still be... well, Sakura, totally pointless. So; Yay or Nay? Go for it? Ideas on it?**

**Finally, Haku; Male or Female? Kind of thinking a fem!HakuxSasuke fling... maybe meeting up again later on...**

**Then there's Naruto's pairing(s)... Anyone but Sakura could play a part (she's already insulted his pretties)... Suggestions? Though, for the foreseeable future none of them will be more serious than a romantic flick, not like people usually marry their teen boyfriends/girlfriends.**

**OMAKE CORNER**

**Visiting ****Naruto's Greenhouse****s,**** Scene One:**

Naruto's greenhouse collection stands at the edge of Konoha, but not outside the Wall. It is a large place, belonging to Naruto mostly because nobody else lays claim on it.

Today, we visit the Warehouse. Named so because... that's exactly what it is; pre-Kyuubi, it was used as a storage warehouse, but during the beast, and the following fall-out of various economic businesses, it was abandoned. Truth be told, its owner gave it away with a smile, even if it was Naruto; when it was bought it was almost at the point of falling apart.

Nothing of the sort now, however. Now, the Warehouse stands rebuilt and robust, perfect for the cultivation of fungi and plants that require less sunlight.

"So... why exactly are we here instead of, I don't know, the _Gates_, waiting for our client?" Asked Sasuke, annoyed.

"Aww, but I have to take care of my pretties!" Replied Naruto, happily. "Since I'll be gone for so long, I have to leave them some food, ya know? What if something happens? I couldn't leave them to starve!"

"And why can't your _clones_ do it?"

"Because my clones break apart after a single blow. Thought you knew that."

Meanwhile Naruto wasn't standing still; he opened a large refrigerator and walked into it. Several grunts of exertion punctuated his speech.

When he came out, he had a whole skinned deer on his shoulders.

"N-N-Naruto? W-What the hell are you doing with that deer?" Asked Kakashi with trepidation.

The blonde just looked back at him in the weird way possible. "Getting some food for my pretties. It's only a bit though, they seem to have been getting weight lately. Need to get them on a diet..." And with a happy whistling tune he was off to feed his 'pretties'.

Growling, wet splattering sounds and crunching of _something_ hard.

Kakashi, Sasuke and Sakura would never set foot in that warehouse for the rest of their lives.

**BACON!**

Haku watched transfixed as the red, malicious chakra raged around Naruto like a maelstrom. It lashed out violently, tendrils of youki cutting gashes through the frozen mirrors.

Then something _wrong_ happened.

What leaf the tendrils would touch became red and rectangle, the smell of smoked meat heavy in the air.

Then came Naruto's voice... **"FOR THE BACOOON!"**

_The following beatdown is removed from the fic for the benefit of underage readers, weak stomachs and people who still have a shred of humanity in them._

"So...how did all that bacon show up in the bridge?" Asked Kakashi. Apparently the lump of meat had been appreciated by the hungry folk of Wave. So much so that most of them didn't care about hygiene and just ate the delicious morsels off the ground.

_Ew._

"Hm, oh, Kyuubi made them out of my leaves when I used its power." Naruto replied nonchalantly. At least it was just Kakashi and Naruto in the room or the jounin would have to practice his memory seals on his own students. He hadn't done so in fourteen years, mostly because last time he _did_... things didn't go well.

"Kyuubi? And... how exactly did he manage that?"

"It's simple really. Thanks to the Law of Flora-Fauna Equality, in tandem with the Energy-To-Heat Theory and compounded by the Otani Heat Theorem, the leaves, as organic matter, could be considered meat, therefore when Kyubi's energy scorched them, they became cooked meat and the quality of such great amounts of _raw_ energy turned them to high quality bacon. Of course one could counter that raw energy in fact is non-existent as it depends on its medium to be expressed, but Kyubi's power surpasses the Circular Numerical Infinity Theorem, turning it in fact into heat." Naruto explained somehow summoning several visual aids in the form of papers with rather analytical equasions and presentations. He even had glasses on his face and wore a white doctor's trechcoat.

"R-Really?"

In an instant, everything had vanished and Naruto went back to staring at the potted plant on the window. "Well no. Kyuubi just made it happen. He likes his bacon you know."

"B-But how?"

"He's Kyuubi. He makes earthquakes, infernoes, volcanos, tornadoes, tsunamis and generally all kinds of disasters. Does the fact he makes bacon seem all that far-fetched?"

"W-Well no but-"

"Besides! It gave me an idea!" Naruto leap up, eyes glowing with barely-repressed intellect and madness. Kakashi wasn't sure the madness was repressed all that much. "A new line of jutsu!"

_'No. No, he can't be thinking-'_

"BACONJUTSU! Bekonton: Bekonyose no jutsu! (Bacon Style: Bacon Summoning)"

Kakashi would later be found in a catatonic state. Psychologists couldn't get him to respond at all.

Except one day that a warden came to work with a strip of smoked meat...

**"BACOOOOON!"** Kakashi's scream of terror would in fact avert the invading force of Oto and Suna ninja; whatever could produce such a horrified scream was definitely out of their league.

Meanwhile, in Naruto's stomach, an old demon looking like a fox grinned happily. He had bacon and all was good.

_Yumm...Bacon.  
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><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	6. Chapter 6  Intermission

_Intermission: Kyuubi's Awakening_

When it had first opened its eyes it felt groggy. It felt _loss_, like the absense of something it... could not exactly place.

Its eyes, big and red, like its power, looked around.

Pathetic.

Is this another imprisonment? Will these hairless apes, an insult to the Gobi, never learn? At least that idiot, Son Goku, had the power to back up his arrogance, but these _humans_ were pathetic little things, too controlled by their feeble emotions, unable to not stare in fear.

All this human... scum, it could not even pull itself out of the mire of hate they had thrown themselves into!

So disgusting!

Fine, nothing better to do, time could pass better if it reviewed some of the brat's memories.

_"He is... dead...There is... there is just no point... You can't hurt us any more..."_

Oh, a forgiving one eh? Amusing. Oh, this is funny even! Sparing your enemy, the one who killed your brother!

What a hypocrite this boy must be!

There is no human that forgiving!

And now what? More power? Oh, this time to give into the hate eh?

Fine, if that is what you are all about. It seems like the brat is really no different from any other human.

There! You want power? Then take it, take it all! Take as much as you can handle, feel what this so-vaunted power is all about! Feel it in your soul, see what you, so foolishly, so arrogantly, try to control!

...

Why? Why are you not killing?

No, there is no way. Hypocrisy is all that humans are good for.

As if there was a chance for one of your pathetic race to rise above your basest instincts.

Trash! Vermin! Disease!

You shall be cleansed from this world like the virus you are!

Ah, the seal tightens again eh? Fine, at least there will be no need to see these sickening _humans_ any more than absolutely necessary.

Sleep well, little human child, while you still can!

The Kyuubi's hate still stands strong!

...

**A/N: Intermissions will occasionally appear when I deem it right for it. Sometimes they will be grim, sometimes they will be funny, sometimes pointless and yet others fluffy. They are mostly for my own entertainment and they will not take more than five minutes to write, so no worries there about cutting into my fic-writing time.  
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><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	7. Chapter 7

_Chapter 7: Natsukashii Kaze (Nostalgic Breeze)_

Sakura woke up slowly, nuzzling her pillow and wrapping her blankets around her. It was so soft and nice to sleep in. But the sun was a merciless and evil bastard and gave her no quarter. So, she slowly got up.

It took her quite a bit of time to wear her kunoichi clothes and secure her hitai-ate on the top of her head, she would never call it her forehead, she had been traumatized to that word. Then, she greeted the day by stepping out of the house, an apple in her hand (she was still on a diet, shannaro!).

To only come across Haku apparently meditating, though it wasn't so. The girl, she had been revealed as such afterwards by Zabuza himself, much to Haku's own displeasure, was practicing with her bloodline, making small crystals of brilliant ice hover around her and move in complicated patterns.

It was a rather mesmerizing sight, catching rays of the light and sending them all over in designs that changed every second but never quite clashed with each other, so Sakura sat down there to watch the ice kunoichi practice while she ate her apple.

"Is there anything you want to talk about, Sakura-san?" The voice might be calm, but its abruptness still made Sakura leap up. Haku allowed herself a small smile, she had increased her sensor range again, apparently. Twenty meters away, she was improving.

"Waaah! Eh, no, I, I'm fine Haku-san. I was just admiring your crystals! They're so pretty!"

"Thank you. It's hard to make them this small and compact. Though, admittedly, it was harder finding out how to make them first, since I had no clan to show me I mean." Again Haku was smiling with her eyes closed, something that for some reason irritated Sakura. Of course, it irritated just about everyone who didn't know the girl, they just thought she was smiling down at them. Then again, it might just be Sakura feeling rather inferior to the girl; she was very pretty, with the classic japanese style of beauty, graceful and _very_ talented. It was just, the girl was so _nice_ to people that nobody could really hate her. Kind of like Naruto in that regard; he was annoying as hell, but his smile took away any irritation in an instant.

Huh, weird that, Haku and Naruto were really similiar after all. Bah, must be a coincidence, no way Naruto would be as talented as her, his jutsu must have been flukes, right? Oh sure, he had gotten better lately, his jutsu were pretty impressive too, considering he had been the dead-last of the Academy, but really, he can't have improved that much right? She could still beat him, right?

For some reason, Sakura wasn't too sure of that. Still, she clung to the idea that Academy scores and positions meant something, that somehow, she was superior to the 'Brat' that everybody hated. Unfortunately for her, a mind as developed as hers wasn't too keen on wilfull idiocy. Her own arguments were crumbling every second she laid eyes on the truth of the dark world she had been introduced to.

"Is something bothering you?" The gentle voice of the ice-user snapped Sakura's attention back to the present. Really, she should stop spacing out so much.

"No... well, maybe. I don't know... It's just that... Well, Zabuza-san attacked us and I... I just froze! I mean, I'm the top-ranked kunoichi from the Academy, and I just... I couldn't do anything! But look at Naruto! He's the dead-last, the weakest of us all, he was a shame on the Academy, he _failed three times_ to graduate!" Then her rant ran out. "But I just froze and he just... He didn't seem to be affected at all so..."

"So you wonder if it was a fluke or if he hid his strength, you wonder about your own self-worth, yes?" Haku was terrifyingly insightful to the pinkette. "Well, from what I know of Naruto-kun, he didn't hide his skill, it is not in his nature to conceal what he can do. He may not outright say it, but he never hides his skills. No, if Naruto-kun was the dead-last of your academy, well, either the academy's standards are far higher than I thought possible or Naruto-kun simply grows scarily quick in terms of skill. I would bet on the latter though."

"B.. but if that's true then... then why... how... what am _I_ supposed to do?"

"Hm... let me tell you a small story, of when I was a child, younger than you. It starts when I was taken in by Zabuza-sama, a few years ago..." She began, looking up towards the sky. Her story was rather short, it was about her trying to become more useful to her master, training day and night to become a sword-user like himself. But, in the end, he told her that she was not suited to that avenue of combat. "... so in the end, I realized, that I have to train for my own benefit, in my own way. Zabuza-sama is different from me, but it does not bother me. I also know that I can probably defeat him, but it does not bother him either. We like being different. But, as you can see, the fact I can defeat Zabuza-sama does not make me stop improving. If anything, loosing to Naruto-kun and Sasuke-kun has made me realized that I want to step up my training. I do not wish to be useless to Zabuza-sama ever again."

Unfortunately for Sakura, she didn't really understand the burning desire to protect someone else at the cost of one's self. Having not felt the sorrow of loosing someone important to yourself, she couldn't really understand why Haku would give her everything to a man who berated her, beat her and pressured her to do many things she didn't want to do. But, she was still very intelligent, if lacking in the wisdom department, but, as they say, wisdom comes with time. So, she nodded as if she understood and walked away, thinking, maybe she should copy Haku-san? Maybe she should start training? She hadn't really given that much attention to it herself since graduation, she hadn't even trained her taijutsu at all in the months since she became team with Sasuke-kun. And Naruto, of course, don't forget the blonde, he seemed to be hopping around Zabuza-san, pestering the giant man with something.

How the blonde could not cringe at the mere sight of the bloodthirsty warrior, she didn't even want to know. I mean, his _sword_ was bigger than _herself_!

Unbeknownst to her, Naruto wasn't pestering Zabuza. Or well, alright, maybe he was. Just a bit.

"Come on, Zabuza-saaaan!" He would whine. "Can't you at least help me out here? Kakashi-sensei's still asleep, the lazy bastard, can't you give me any hints, I need to up my jutsu repertoire!"

"Alright, alright, shut up already!" The poor man was at his wit's end. He wasn't really that angry, but was it too much to be allowed to meditate on his sword for a couple of hours? "Here's a chakra control excercise, a step up from your tree climbing; water walking." He demonstrated it by taking a few steps on the water and even sitting down on it, before opening the pouch filled with ninja tools... or, in his case, filled with rice cakes made by Haku. The girl was a kitchen master; she'd made so many things in the wild that giving her an actual kitchen was... well, he'd be happily munching on some food for the foreseeable future.

Of course, the little brat wasn't about to let him have his peace, of course he wouldn't. Instead, Naruto sent out a few clones before sitting down across the swordsman. "Say, you're good at using swords and stuff, right? Like, you're supposed to be one of the best, right?" Zabuza's glare made right to the feeling of underestimation there. "Yeah, could you, like help me here a bit?" He took the noncommital grunt as an agreement. "Y'see, I'm trying to make a new weapon, and it has sword parts, so I thought you might help me design it." Now, there was a little bit of interest. Zabuza may care for very few things, slaughter and blood being at the top of the list, but weapons, and in particular swords, were pretty darn high up there too. A scroll filled with designs and schematics was tossed over the water and securely caught by the large hand. Naruto smiled.

And Zabuza would not admit it, but he was getting to _like_ the kid. Pity he couldn't take the blondie with him, if he made leaves dangerous then... well...

In the meantime, Sakura wandered around aimlessly, trying to sort herself out. A few years down the lane, she'd admit to having gotten a culture shock, but for now, she was worried about how this new world had the tendency of messing up her ordered, structured illusion that she had lived inside for so long. Sure, she knew that it had been an illusion, she had read the wars and the warnings about how dangerous life could be for a ninja, but it just never hit home, hell, she hadn't seen a person even bleeding seriously!

Of course, regardless of how absorbed she was by her thoughts, she would never miss the sight of Sasuke training. He had carved out the outermost layer of a tree's bark and was now punching and kicking it, occasionally leaping back to throw a shuriken or three mid-air, spinning to strike with kunai, almost dancing around the poor plant. It was amazing really, he seemed to flow from one attack to the other seamlessly, it really inspired Sakura.

So, hesitantly, she asked him if she could join him in practice. It wasn't just so she could be near him or have a chance to feel him u- err, grapple with him.

Instead she got an incredulous look. "Why? Not like it would help you much." He had replied, breaking the poor girl's attempts. At least Sasuke seemed to realize he said something insensitive so, taking the opportunity to have a break, he sat down and faced her. "Your taijutsu is abhorrent. You hit strong, but you lack form and overextend yourself. Also, you're very slow and your reflexes are barely up to snuff. In fact, it's better for me to practice against a tree than against you." He took a break here to let the girl digest it all, while also drinking a bit of Naruto's hand-made herbal tea. The blonde was _sure_ this time he had gotten the recipe right. The lack of rashes, fever and barfing also seemed to compound that fact. Or, he had become immunized to poisons. "Truth is, you probably overthink things. You look at an enemy and begin calculating vectors, strategies, movements, countermovements, like it's all a big chess game. That makes your taijutsu fail; you cannot adapt and you take too long."

"B-But... I... I'm supposed to... to be..."

"To be the top kunoichi? As if, Hinata's the best in taijutsu, hands down, after Kiba. Ino's better than you too, hell Naruto's better than you, and the dobe's hopeless when it's not about jutsu." He let out a smirk at that, it was good to know he was better than the blonde in at least _something_. "It's just that Hinata can't hurt a fly and Ino... I don't really know why Ino never fought seriously, really." He shrugged, he didn't care much, if the Yamanaka didn't want to try and improve herself, it wasn't his problem now, was it? "So, taijutsu is pointless for you; with a lot of work you may become adequate, but you're never going to be good enough. Also, you're just as hopeless in ninjutsu; just a bit of tree-walking fatigued you, high-cost jutsu would kill you." Again a break, this time to chow down some fruit. Mmm, tasted good. Gulp it down, wipe the juice from his lips and a deep breath. "As you are right now, Sakura, you simply cannot depend on two of the three basic ninja arts. Also, you lack a bloodline, another problem for you. Way I see it? You're not a combat type. You just don't belong in the front line, nor are you especially good at stealth, what with pink hair and all." This one was delivered with an attempt at humour, which Sakura did not find funny at all, unlike how Naruto would have. "Really, you only have two options, maybe three, available; medic, genjutsu and traps." Another bite of the fruit, damn it was almost addicting. "Traps require a tactical mind, you have that, so it should be easy. But detecting a trap is easier than setting it, so it won't give you an obvious benefit for quite some time, until you get good enough. That lives genjutsu and medic arts."

"M-medic? Genjutsu? But... that's..." She didn't think all that much about them; the Academy did a downright amazing job of directing the children to more flashier styles. Even if those styles got them killed.

"What? Weak, pathetic? One of the strongest..." He cringed this time, a faraway look in his eyes. "strongest ninja of Konoha was a genjutsu master; he killed a hundred ninja in one night without anyone even getting to touch him." Damn, it was still hard remembering _that day_. Naruto had helped a lot in overcoming the pain, but it was still there. Sasuke knew it would always be there. "He was so strong that entire ANBU teams backed away rather than face him in combat. So, no, genjutsu is definitely not pathetic. However, like traps, it also requires a lot of work before you can get to a good enough level, mostly because the genjutsu breaking techniques are so darn easy, it's like cheating." Of course, Sasuke would never admit he himself was nowhere near that good with genjutsu, not even his sharingan had boosted that talent much. Oh, he still was better than most gennin could hope to be, but he was nowhere near the talent others showed. "As for medic? Well, one word; Tsunade." He left it at that, knowing he didn't have to say any more; Sakura knew of Senju Tsunade's history and legendary skills.

Elsewhere, Kakashi was sitting on the moor a far-away look on his face. He had set 'Shi loose too much on the bridge. He could feel the alter ego whisper in his ear about being careful, about constant vigilance, about keeping a knife always handy because everyone could be an enemy in disguise, that he couldn't be safe until everyone around him was dead and burried, everyone was out to get him, but he'd show them, he'd get them first, he'd slit their throats in the darkness, he'd mess up their minds and destroy, destroy, destroy!

Needless to say, Kakashi was _not_ a happy person this morning. Even after two days of rest, he still couldn't quell his urgings to take out a few kunai and vanish into the shadows, waiting for the right moment to kill. So, there he was looking out at the world from one of the many piers near Tazuna's home. That last battle had shown him many things that were wrong about his team. Sasuke wasn't like himself, Naruto was no Obito and Sakura had little in common with Rin.

He had confused the past with the present. That was a mistake he could not allow himself to repeat. Last time he made such a mistake, his old team was destroyed. This time, they were saved only by the aid of their former enemy.

"What's got ya so super down, Kakashi?" Came the bridgebuilder's voice, accompanied with a strong scent of alcohol.

"Hm? Am I that easy to read?"

The older man just shoved him a bottle of sake. "Only when yer like that. So, what's so super wrong ya can't train yer brats? Ye've been super down since that super bridge fight."

Kakahi took a swing of the alcohol. Wasn't anything too great, but it hit just as well. "It's those brats, Tazuna-san. It took them nearly dieing for me to realize they're not... they're not like my old team. Because of my softness, because I believed them to be like... like my old friends..." He took another swig and chuckled at Tazuna's expecting look; the old man wanted his sake back. "they almost died. I should have paid them more attention, trained them a little bit harder, maybe fought for real against Zabuza in the first fight..."

"Ye often don't know if tha bridge is gonna last until the first storm hits it, Kakashi." The old man sounded more wise than he'd heard him before, or maybe it was the sake. "Yer brats ain't dead yet, and they're super skilled, even the pink-haired one, she did things with bandages I don't know you could do, super cool that was, she'd be a super doctor." The bottle lost some more alcohol. "But, yer brats ain't dead yet, are they? So, it might just be me, but I think ye should get down to teachin' them some super techniques and make them super ninja. The Kamis know we need some more kind people, like these. Most ninja would'ave left me ta die a super messy death and then Wave would'ave been super doomed..."

"You know, I never thought I'd agree with you, but you're right. Maybe I should really get down to training them..." And he had so much to teach them too, ninjutsu, taijutsu, genjutsu, fuinjutsu, kenjutsu... Naruto would have probably gotten off at hearing about all these jutsu-words.

"Good ta see yer back. Now gimme my sake back!"

Kakashi could only laugh at that.

Lunch was far less reserved than it used to be before the Great Bridge Battle, as it had become known to the people of wave. Naruto would often tell stories of his... accomplishments in Konoha, how he would trick others or the pranks he would pull, causing everyone to laugh at his antics. Even Sakura would only barely manage to conceal her giggles under a stern look. She _had_ to uphold her place as the serious one of the group. Kakashi also shared parts of the story where he and his team fell into Naruto's smart traps, sometimes willingly, sometimes not, making even Zabuza chuckle at them.

Haku was the greatest change of them all however. Before, she was 'pure' and 'kind' but there was always a coldness in her heart, her lack of a childhood, Zabuza's almost inhuman training, not associating with others, not having someone she could share her feelings with... That she had managed to avoid tainting her soul as much as she had was a testament to her strength of character. Still, there was always the awkwardness, the inability to sympathize with others, the questioning of if it all ever meant something, of if she was _worth_ anything. But, in just one short moment, with a scant few words, Zabuza had shown her that he cared for her, the girl's world seemed to turn around for the bettter.

The team's resident Uchiha however, wasn't doing so stellar. He had been defeated by Haku, not that he cared if she was a girl, he wasn't that stupid or conceited, but he himself had been defeated. Sure, it had been due to his own actions and after he had been nearly exhausted in the fight, with an almost broken arm to boot, but still... His pride just couldn't take it! And then, Naruto had to go and beat Haku. It was just like his brother, that feeling of rising jealousy, it annoyed him! Naruto had no bloodline and yet he beat an enemy _with_ one, not to mention he outlasted him, an Uchiha, the clan lauded to be the elites! At least Naruto never really showed off or spoke about his victory. It seemed as if he was ashamed or hurt that he won, but at the same time, Sasuke felt better about it.

That's why he was there at this moment, in the clearing where they first met Haku, with said girl there with him. "I have to fight you, one more time, Haku."

"Eh? Why?" The girl only tilted her head to the side, confused.

Sasuke just looked at the moon above them, a full moon, it would provide good lighting. "It's for my pride. At that bridge you... you destroyed me."

"That's not true Sasuke-kn, you kept up with me at first, I know many chuunin who can't."

That earned a chuckle, she was always so nice, never hurting another's feelings. "But as soon as you got serious, I lost, right? I couldn't even scratch your mirrors. That... I _have_ to fight you, one more time, this time, both of us at full power! I want to fight you, defeat you, I want to overcome the milestone that is 'you'!"

"Then can't I just give up so you can win?"

"Would you give up for Zabuza-san? I won't give up either. This is for my pride, this is for me to know... to know that I'm getting stronger! That I don't waste my time! To prove to myself that my path is right!"

Haku only smiled, once again with her eyes closed, but when she opened them, they were as cold as her ice. "Fine then, Uchiha Sasuke. Come at me however you like." Even her voice was dead, but Sasuke's newly-activated Sharingan could spot a single, minute twitch of her lips.

So Uchiha Sasuke, last loyal Uchiha of Konoha, laughed. His chakra flared around him like an aura, like he had seen Naruto do every time he was excited. He vanished in a flash of shadow and a glint of steel.

More than two hours later, both Sasuke and Haku were sitting on the same tree, exhausted, scratched, cut and both of them smiling.

"The power of the Sharingan is amazing..." Sasuke breathed out in awe.

"Is that so? I think... I think that Sasuke-kun is the amazing one actually." That caused the boy to turn to look at her, puzzled. He received a gentle smile. "The Sharingan is strong, but Sasuke-kun is _powerful_. Even if you couldn't see my attacks, you got up again and again, no matter how many times I put you down, each time you got stronger and stronger... It was like Sasuke-kun had become... more... than he already was... And at the bridge, Sasuke-kun's Sharingan is what showed him my last attack but... it was Sasuke-kun himself was was strong enough to give his life up for his friend. I think... no, I believe, that it is Sasuke-kun who is truly strong. The Sharingan is only a tool, not the source of your power."

"I... I see... but still, you were amazing, Haku..." He wanted to turn the conversation away from those dangerous waters. The Sharingan had been the source of his family's pride, but somehow, Haku made it seem like it was worth no more than a kunai. A good kunai, but just a kunai. He didn't want to think more on that. "I mean, you changed your movements every time to fool the Sharinga's predictive capabilities and you were so fast that, even if I could see you, I didn't have any time to react."

The girl giggled once again, it seemed to be somewhat of a habit lately. "Ah, but I have trained my bloodline to its upper limits... you have just began learning." She gave him another smile. "I have no doubt that, if Sasuke-kun continues to protect his precious people, he will become more powerful than he believes."

A long time was spent in that clearing between the two teens, just staring at the moon in that clearing. Some nights, Naruto would come with them too, and they would share both blood, food and emotions as almost-family.

Sasuke wouldn't admit it even the day they would split their ways, but he was very sad he would watch Haku go. So much in fact, that he had to ask her and Zabuza about their plans for the future. "So, Zabuza-san, where will you and Haku be heading?" But he could not say 'why don't you stay with us'.

"Hm... probably for a vacation, we got more than our share from Gatou's money." The gruff man replied. "Then I guess it's off to Kirigakure, take a part in the slaughter going on there..." He adopted an excited look, much to the disapprovement of Haku. "Ah, all the blood I'll be able to spill there!"

And in comes Sakura with her rapidly crumbling naivety. She really should have known better, but she _was_ rather tenacious in holding as much of her innocence as she could. Logical, really. "B-but... won't you take part in the rebellion? I... I mean you _did_ start it..." She almost stuttered at the incredulous look on Zabuza's face.

"The rebellion? Now why would I want to do that? I didn't do it to liberate Kirigakure."

"B-But Kakashi-sensei and the books they said..."

"Lemme set your story straight girl; I didn't do it for Kiri, I hate everyone there, I just hate them less than I hate everybody else." With the exception of present company, especially Haku. "I didn't do it for Kiri, I did it for the Mizukage; I just wanted to kill the fucker. That's all there is to it."

"B-But... but I... I thought that..."

"Listen up, little girl. I'm a murderer, a psychotic killer. And I _like_ it. I like slaughter as much as any psycho next door." His grin turned sour. "But above that, I'm a _warrior_. Not a thug! I give all my enemies a chance to fight back and I don't kill the weaklings, there's no honor in that, unless it's part of my job, nothing I can do about that." Then his voice fell into a growl. "But that bastard of a Mizukage did not. He didn't care about honor or about fighting or about being a warrior. He just wanted people to die. He murdered ninja and civilians alike, men and pregnant women, children who could barely walk straight. That kind of killing just didn't sit right with me. And killing babies is just wrong man, _wrong_!"

"Zabuza-sama has no respect for life or humans. Only individuals." Haku's wise voice startled them and calmed the berserk shinobi down. "That's why it was never about fighting in a rebellion or taking up Mizukage's spot. It was just about killing someone who could fight back, who could rival Zabuza-sama. Nothing more, maybe much less."

"So, why can't you come with us to Konoha?" Asked Naruto, relieving Sasuke of the duty of asking that. "I mean, Sandaime-no-jiisan would probably take you in! He's the bestest old man-tebbayo!" It was a childish delivery, just like how Naruto sometimes regressed into, but they could not refute the honesty of his offer. Kakashi also knew that the Hokage would probably do it too, if it was for Naruto.

Zabuza only laughed. "You think that any sane Hokage would take me, the Demon of the Mist in? That they would give me a home and the slaughter I crave? You're a funny one, boy!"

"No, it would not be impossible for Naruto to do..." Kakashi spoke from his book. "Naruto and the Hokage have a... very complicated relationship. If it was for Naruto, he would welcome you, even if that made Konoha a major target in the political and financial arena." Now it was time for Zabuza to look surprised. "He would do it, but it would cause many problems for Konoha, Naruto, if we were just to up and take a foreign rogue ninja as one of our own. Small villages, like Ame, sometimes do it to bolster their ranks, but that's because they are so small. A major village like Konoha would have a lot of trouble, mostly because we have a major Daimyo behind us, meaning we have to 'make an example'." The Icha-Icha book snapped close. "But, say, if the Mizu rebellion were to end and Zabuza-san be honorably discharged, say for seeing too much slaughter," A grin at the impossibility of that. "It would be much easier to... err, 'purchase' him, for a certain price."

"Feh! Fat chance of that happening!" Zabuza scoffed. "I'm a national treasure of Kiri! My sword is considered a legend as great as _me_, they would never give me up, for any price, not unless they could rip every single dirty secret their pathetic little water-drowned country filled my body with! Haku's even worse; she's a former Hunter, they'd sooner remove her spine from her still-breathing body than let her live. Nah, if we even said something about that, at best we'd get personality-altering seals to our foreheads." He grumbled. He wouldn't admit that it was because he felt more loyalty to the blonde menace than for the entirety of Kiri's population.

Sasuke however, refused to accept it. Kiri did sound like an awful place for anyone, especially poor Haku and what she had gone through in there. No way he was going to leave her there to rot! And if that means getting Zabuza, her adopted father figure, to come to Konoha as well... Well, the Uchiha clan _did_ have a large amount of funds just sitting there and getting taxed for the comforts of Konoha's Council. If he had to waste the entirety of the Uchiha fortunes to get these two out of Kiri, in Sasuke's mind, they would be funds well-spent.

"But, but! There has to be a way! They can't just imprison you there, just 'cause you were born there, it's... it's... It's just so unfair!" Naruto whined. Somehow, he had taken a shine to Zabuza, his attraction to Haku was a given; she was like a big sister to him.

"I'm afraid that's how it is Naruto." Kakashi sighed. "Unless they can get the leader of whatever side wins the Rebellion indentured to them, nothing can be done. Kiri was always xenophobic..."

"Well I won't give up!" Naruto smashed his hands on the table, getting up. "Even if I have to work day and night, even if I have to kill, even if I have to give everything I own up, I will not accept it! Neither will you, right Sasuke?"

"What are you asking me for? Of course I don't accept it. But, no matter what you do, Naruto, you can't change everything. They don't care about you working or about you killing or about anything that you own." His glare was piercing and angry. "It's just the way of this sick, demented world."

"Then let's change it, dammit! I don't have much to give, but I would, if it would change things! And if all of us give something, even if alone it's not much, together we'd be able to do it!"

This time it was time for Sakura to whisper the blonde's name. She had rarely seen such charisma, such force of personality and will, be displayed so blatantly, so _powerfully_. It was as if Naruto exuded some force that pulled people to him, like a magnet or a great general rallying his troops.

But Zabuza only laughed, though Haku and those who knew him best could tell it was just as sad as it was amused. "Way to go, boy, never change! It may be impossible, but you'll fight it, won't you?" He laughed some more. Damn, he was glad he had met these people! "Better move on though, that's one of the things it's impossible to change."

The next day they said their farewells, first to Zabuza and Haku and then to Team Seven. Neither Kakashi nor Zabuza knew where Haku, Naruto and Sasuke had slept, nor where they had been before showing up for their departures.

Tsunami's glare was enough to stop both men from inquiring, and Sakura was still too troubled by her own discoveries to bother Sasuke with questions. Didn't stop her from loudly welcoming him or professing how worried she was.

In the end, neither group was too good with emotions (with the exception of Sakura, but she had never bonded with Zabuza and Haku like the boys had) so their farewell was a simple one; a handshake, or hug in the case of Naruto, Haku and Sasuke, and a promise to meet again. Neither was allowed to die nor let their precious people die until that time.

While Zabuza and Haku left in relative peace, with only Team Seven and Tazuna's family being there, Naruto and his own team weren't quite so lucky. It seemed as if all of Wave had come to see them off, even from the cities away from the Bridge, those that had only heard of the deeds.

Sakura and Naruto really lapped up the praise, it felt good to be appreciated, and so did Sasuke, though he wouldn't admit or show it apart from a smug smirk on his face. Kakashi on the other hand played it 'cool' and 'hip' as his closest friend would say.

Walking the way back home, Naruto realized that he was coming back to Konoha, where no one really appreciated him. At least, there was good ramen there and he had his pretties to take care of, so he wouldn't be bothered by those damn idiots. If they thought he was a demon and he couldn't be trusted... well, he knew the truth now. He didn't need them to acknowledge his existence, someone already had, many people already had. Sasuke however, decided it was time to step up his training. Sure, Naruto was a prodigy, but he was a genius dammit! He couldn't let Naruto get stronger than him, he had his damn pride to uphold! That's not to say that he was jealous of his friend, well, alright, maybe he was a little bit envious, but Haku had told him many things, and he knew he would grow stronger and stronger. All he needed was a reason.

Looking to his side, seeing his best friend laughing and pointing at the many trees, making jokes and bad puns at him... Sasuke realized that he already had a reason. Yes, it was a good thing to go back home.

Kakashi smiled as he looked over his Icha Icha. He was now armed with important wisdom and by the gods, he would put it to use. "So, what are you going to do when we get back, eh, my cute little gennin?" He asked, gathering their attention. "We're probably going to get a week or so of leave to calm down from all the excitement before going back to our regular program. So, anything planned out?"

"Training." Sasuke was quickly reverting to his old one-word, grunt-based replies, which Kakashi was beginning to think was more of a defence mechanism than a personality trait.

"Such as?" He prompted.

"Taijutsu, genjutsu, ninjutsu. Time to put my Sharingan to use."

"Oh, that will be good, but not good enough, Sasuke. Even if you memorize everything perfectly through the sharingan, you are still going to lag a bit, doubly so if you haven't conditioned your body to be quick and agile. I'll see what I can do to find you a few more textbooks on taijutsu, you have an aptitude for it, it seems."

"Hnnn." Well that was an agreement.

"The teme agrees, sensei." Naruto translated, earning a half-hearted glare from his friend. "I'll need some taijutsu training too, Mizuki-sensei never taught me any and the Library doesn't have anything I can use, the shops mostly just throw me out too, guess I pranked them a few times too many or somethin'..." It wasn't true of course, but he had to cover it somehow, and Kakashi knew it.

"Hm... I may have a few scrolls back home, a couple of styles you could take up." Of course, one of them was limited to one clan and one clan only, but he could hopefully pass it off as an extremely rare, very powerful style that he was given by Naruto's parents. Even if he gave the wrong parent and never told him that he wasn't adopted into the clan.

"Yeah, and I've been looking into seals too, I mean, explosive notes are AWESOME!" He yelled, earning a shudder and cold sweat from Kakashi, along with looks of fear from Sakura. Sasuke only twitched his lips upward, huh, weird. "But the books say I could blow myself up if I'm not careful, so I've only been memorizing them for now... plus, I still haven't found a seal that does exactly what I want it to!"

Sakura interrupted Naruto's grumbling, hoping to draw his attention away from explosive notes and the like. Seriously, the blonde's unhinged enough sometimes. Giving him access to things that go 'boom' would be a bad, _bad_ idea. "I'd like to get a primer on genjutsu and healing techniques..." She cut in, shyly. Not being able to fight next to her idol hurt, but she believed that she could still be there with him if she could become a combat medic like Tsunade-sama. She could still be of use to him! "Maybe I'll learn a few basic ninpo too, see if I can combine them or something."

"Ah, a genjutsu mistress in the making, yes that would suit you well. Maybe I'll have to get Kurenai-chan to repay me that favor she owes me now. Goody, more time for Icha Icha!" He happily finished, enjoying how he riled up the girl. Seriously, if she ever found out the truth behind his addiction to it...

Two days later, the Gates appeared ahead and Naruto somehow managed to egg Saske on to get a contest on, see who got there first. Sakura only shook her head and Kakashi chuckled, these two would be great, he had never seen Sasuke push himself so hard, nor Naruto ever act so serious.

But, the two boys still had a lot to learn and Kakashi chuckled softly as he passed them at the gates; the two gennin had worn themselves off, since their race stopped being just about speed but also reflexes as they tried to slow down each other with every trick they had. Oh, the joys of youth, Kakashi thought, but made a note to keep Naruto away from his green-dressed friend.

Despite his exhaustion, Naruto smiled as he walked past the gates.

"It's good to be home."

**A/N: Yet another chapter by yours truly, though it was my hardest one yet. Hope you enjoyed it and want to adopt it.**

**Alright first things first; apparently I'll be keeping the kick-based taijutsu, with additions from Kakashi to prepare Naruto for his father's Hummingbird style (or whatever it's called as that's fannon as far as I know). Also, his plants will play a major role in helping him, kind of like Batman's gadgets, though they won't be stealing his jutsu's thunder. **

**Now, some of you, my dear readers, complained about me 'bashing' Sakura. I do not think I did so, nor do I think I depicted her in a too-bitchy way. But, let us take a look at the evidence, shall we?**

**Sakura is 13 years old, called a genius, in love (or obsession at this point in time) with Sasuke, with a loving mother (and possibly father or siblings, we just haven't seen them). Now, in chapters 1-4 she got along better with Naruto because he helped her get in the same team as Sasuke (she might not understand why, but she heard him add her to the team, disagreeing in her favor with Sasuke). However, the next chapter was not a peaceful time. Here, there was a killer, a murderer, someone who killed a dozen people when he was her age. And he was going to kill her. At that point, Sakura needed to vent, she needed to blame someone else, she desperately **_**needed**_** to revert to peaceful times, or else the weight would crush her. So yes, she did regress to times when she berated Naruto. Also, she **_**is**_** smarter than him, she's known she is throughout the Academy, she got top marks while he bottomed out. You can't break the habit of underestimating someone in so little time. And yes, that line about Naruto being a parentless nobody is mean, but children that age often say mean or hurtful things, but that does not make them evil. Sakura never experienced loss like Sasuke nor solitude like Naruto. If you recall, she thought that not having parents was awesome. It's just, in times of great stress, hidden feelings and beliefs may come rushing out.**

**So yes, Sakura got 'bashed' a bit, she got 'bashed' for an instant here as well. But, this will not be the focus of the fic. Nor do I intend to have her as a bitch/bash-target. She will get better, she will work hard to, but it's going to take a bit of time. And if you were worrying about her being outside the others' insane world, well, can you imagine her as insane? At first it seems almost cute, but after she gets trained by Tsunade? Brr... scary! She could make Kabuto seem like a pretty decent guy. She will get in on their private world of madness, but it's going to take time.**

**Just finished my first SW:RPG adventure... anyone willing to give it a try? Not overly complicated, but it might help to point out to your players that shooting everything in sight isn't always the smart thing to do (suicidal droids ahoy!).**

**So, for those of you wanting to adopt but have no idea of other jutsu types, here's another; Satsujin-ton. Can mean 'killing god' or, as it is in fact written, 'killing dust' style. It's a combination of using Konohagakure's wind manipulation to pick up dust, grain and sand and then imbuing them with raiton chakra. Raiton chakra isn't actually electricity, but it has the effect of 'piercing' through all defences. So, with that in mind, **_**"did you know that it takes just a single grain of sand to induce a heart or brain stroke?"**_** *Insert evil laughter here***

**Another could be a physical manipulation of the body humours while within the body for taijutsu practice; while punching, suddenly shift a lot of blood to the point of impact, increasing the mass. And as the F=1/2*m*s^2, or force equals one half the mass times speed square, Naruto could easily increase the effective mass from, say, 1 kg to 10 kg, multiplying the force by a factor of ten. Or, he could use body-humour manipulation to emulate the effects of genjutsu while avoiding that pesky 'genjutsu kai' thing altogether; he could cause the brain to overload in adrenaline, making targets extremely irritable and unstable, or endorphins, causing them die from laughter, or even make them so hungry they cannibalize themselves or so scared they begin to hallucinate or... Well, possibilities are endless.**

**And if you want a shinigami!Naruto, then have him use seals and a variety of swords to make up for not being born in Bleach-verse. Specially made skinsuit could mimic Sado's arms, a sword could have a seal for hyoton manipulation in the hilt or it could have the ability to instantly turn normal chakra into wind-chakra. He could even add a safeguard just in case his swords are stolen, the whole shi-kai routine, one has to say it before the true form of the sword, hidden by a form of seals, when sword-1 is held and incantation spoken, it unseals sword-2 and seals sword-1 into sword-2, when canceled, sword-1 is unsealed and sword-2 is sealed into sword-1. Maybe he places seals on his sandals to keep him airborn, or an accident as a child (maybe a shard of white-hot chakra-conductive steel was rammed into his stomach, where chakra is created from, as he worked on the forge) made him unable to use 'small' jutsu, like ninja usually have, instead forcing him to spend humongous amounts of chakra to make an effect, but also increasing it in size. The Kido incantations could be a mnemonic trick to help him focus so his chakra doesn't go berserk; he can cut the incantation short after he gains more and more control.**

**OMAKE CORNER**

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouse Scene Two:**

He was the top infiltration specialist in Iwa. Able to meld through stone as if walking through air and trained in all forms of stealth in all kinds of terrain imaginable.

His mission simple; sneak into Konoha and learn about their current state. Rumours of a blond-haired, blue-eyed gennin with a penchant for previously unheard-of techniques was worrying. Could Konoha be building an army of Yondaime-clones?

So, he had been dispatched to find the truth.

In the dead of the night, he felt at home. It had been easy for him to sneak inside the village, too easy. That had made him wonder, why had there not been any guards in that section of the Wall? It had seemed as if they all avoided it, and that had greatly interested the Iwa spy.

So, confident in his skills, he had snuck in, past the security hole.

Mayhaps he should have thought that if that particular area, right next to a warehouse owned by the blond gennin he was told to spy on, had been left alone, that maybe there had been a reason for that.

But he didn't, so he quietly made his way through the Wall and shadowed the warehouse walls. There were windows but they were far too high and he wasn't far away from the patrols to be able to use chakra and remain undetected. Luckily for him, he had found a back door.

Weird thing; the door had seemed to be propped from the outside, as if to keep something in.

No matter. It was easy to remove the prop and he did so.

Then he froze. Had he heard something?

There it was again, an airy giggle in the air, playful and... female? Leaning into the door, he placed his ear on it and stilled.

Small splashes of some liquid and more giggles, airy talks that he couldn't understand thanks to the inteference of the metal door.

Those laughs... they sounded so pretty, so clear, so simply beautiful that the infiltrator tried to meld himself to the door, trying to listen to them more.

So enchanting they were.

And the scent, reminiscent of honey and roses and something else he couldn't identify but missed like his own lover's embrace.

More, he had to have more.

More, he leaned on the door more.

But the door was not meant to prevent something from entering, but something from leaving, and it buckled inwards, making the shinobi fall on the floor ungracefully.

He shook his head for a moment, wondering why exactly he had done that, before raising his eyes.

The giggles had stopped but at least now he saw who had been giggling.

Women. Beautiful, absolutely stunning women, wearing naught but see-through shawls.

Bronze-skinned, or fair skinned. Some with skin like that of ebon and others with a rosy hue. Hair, going the full gamut from pitch-black to fiery-red, golden-blonde to even platinum-silver.

Women with bodies so perfect they stole the man's breath away, scent so alluring he could honestly believe all other smells were like sewage to him now, beauty so great that no woman he had ever seen could compare.

And by the gods, what had they been doing? A large leaf, bright green and large enough to make a dozen-people pool, had housed several of these women while others sat in the edges, their long, creamy legs just barely touching the liquid inside, so much like water but much sweeter. Some of the beauties had been playing with each other when the man interfered, their hands in places held only for lovers, some of them kissing each other while others had been grooming themselves.

No sounds left the man's thoat as he just stood there and gawked.

He watched, absolutely enchanted, as one of the women moved towards him, so gracefully as if she didn't walk but float, and kneeled in front of him. Dainty, soft, cool fingers touched his face and lifted it towards her. Eyes a deep, penetrating, emerald-green peered into him and the woman smiled. Her lips, full and colored like ripe fruit, were placed over his, not demanding but _giving_.

The man almost lost his 'load' right then and there.

When the woman pulled back he followed her as much as he could, considering he was still prone. Instead, she helped him up and kissed him again, this time even more passionately. With a gentle tug, she pulled him towards her 'sisters', her voice ethereal and yet easily understood to the man now; _"Join us."_

The next day, Naruto found a brand new set of weapons and clothes in his warehouse. They were neatly packed and waiting for him.

He grinned and gently caressed the vine-like plants that stood before it. "Presents? For me? Oh, thank you my beloved pretties!"

If one paid attention, they would have seen the tree shudder, almost as if in pleasure and an airy, ethereal voice reply: _"Thank you, our Master and Love."_

Then again, they might have also noticed an off-white powder and red dots at the feet of those same-self plants.

Naruto called this variety 'Dryads'.

**Zabuza's Undefeated Enemy**

"So, how _did_ you get forced out of Kiri, Zabuza?" Asked Kakashi, curious. "All sources specify that you went in and after a few minutes ran out, though unwounded..."

"It was..." Zabuza began with a shudder. "The toughest enemy in my life... One not even I could ever hope to defeat..."

_~~Flashback~~_

_Zabuza was running through the building's halls, eyes red with bloodlust and blade red with regular blood. Oh, how he loved it, the sounds of screams, the look of hopelessness, the sigh of their last breaths, the crimson-red blood splattering all over him, seemingly seeping into his skin!_

_This was the life!_

_But, first things first; killing the Mizukage. Then, he'd be able to slaughter anyone freely. Oh, the fun to be had then!_

_Ah! Finally! There it is, the Mizukage's office!_

_Heh, the bastard isn't there, just like Shiho said, that girl was a good lay, and an even better informant. Pity that she thought he had fallen for her, he didn't like stringing her along like this, but hell, he had a Kage to kill, didn't he?_

_So, the assassin snuck in like a proper ninja, no chakra or flashy jutsus, climbed to the ceiling, where he situated himself on some wooden beams._

_Heh, you'd think that, for a ninja villages, _someone_ would think to look _up_, but no one ever does._

_Hey, wait, where had these papers come from? H-hey, how come the stack grows taller every time he blinks?_

_"Agh, damn burritos! It's the last time I'm going to that place!" Came the Mizukage's voice from behind the now-opening door. The Kage looked at the paperwork and audibly groaned. "Again? I went out for five minutes, _five goddamn minutes!_, and it's back to this size? FUCK! What is it this time about? _'We, of the Trade Council demand that there be a uniform thickness in the cloth of uniforms of-' _What the fuck is this all about!" The man raged. "Didn't I just send them a reply? DIDN'T I JUST SEND THEM A REPLY? Why do they have to send the form again? I just wish someone would come around and kill me now! Then the office would take them as Mizukage and have _them_ do this gods-forsaken paperwork!"_

_~~End Flashback~~_

"My enemy was too strong to defeat..." Shuddered Zabuza, getting a sympathetic look from Kakashi.

"Too true. The Mizukage must really be very strong..."

Zabuza didn't bother correcting him.

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	8. Chapter 8

_Chapter 8: Mori no Hayate (Fleeting Breeze of the Forest)_

"WAHAHAHAHOOO!"

The loud whoop of joy made Sasuke leap up from the tree he used to lean against, just in time to see a flying Naruto soar past him, out of the small forest behind him, a small line of leaves breaking apart.

"WEEEE-! Oh craap!" And that was the blonde falling right into the middle of the river.

"Oi, you all there, dobe?" Sasuke asked mockingly as he leapt under the bridge, sticking there with chakra and lending a hand to pull the soaking-wet blonde out of the water. "I'd give you a 4 for style but a nice 9 for your landing execution."

"Hey! My style's solid gold! Don't diss it!"

"Riiight..." He drawled at Naruto's indignant cries. "Because orange and blue obscenities is called 'style' these days."

"Better than having a duck's ass as hair!"

"Much better than having a face like a shaved cat, a _colorblind_ shaved cat!"

"Boys, may I have your attention? If it's not _too_ much of a chore." Kakashi's voice surprised the two; he had hidden his presence expertly the foliage of a tree. "Now, there's a great event coming up and you, my cute little gennin, will be taking part in it, if you'd like. It's an elite event, so I'm not sure I should enlist you-"

"We're in! We're _so_ in-tebbayo!" Naruto's happy cries at taking part in an elite shinobi event interrupted his teacher, much to the laughter of his team. "Can I bring my pretties too? They'll behave, I promise!"

"Erm, yes, well, I'm afraid you won't be able to bring your... your 'pretties'... along for most of it. It's a very ninja event, you know, can't have many witnesses spoiling our ninjaish ninja-ness." Kakashi tried not to laugh at his student. Oh, the kid was a blast to have around, random as hell, but dependable like few people could hope to. "Anyway, this event is..." He paused for effect, almost laughing at the way Naruto seemed to hang from his words, who knew he'd like pranking the blonde blob of energy so much? "...Chuunin Exam Selection!" He finished dramatically.

"Yay! Chuunin Exam! Chuunin Exam!" Naruto danced around before stopping, with a wondering expression on his face. "Err... what's Chuunin Exam?"

The question caused poor Sakura's face to meet the ground with sheer incredulity before leaping up, hands clenched, and bonking him while shouting about his immaturity. "Narutooo!"

It was only when the Naruto went poof in her hands that she realized she had been beating on a clone. Also, that's about when the laughter of her most annoying team-mate registered with her.

"Oh! You should have -hahaha- seen your face, Sakura-chan! It was so funny!"

"Funny was it? I'LL SHOW YOU FUNNY!" And then she was off, chasing him, fist raised in the air.

"Well, at least she's back to normal. Her being so silent annoyed you more than her usual antics eh?" Kakashi commented idly, getting a 'Hn' from his leftover student, to which he in turn gave an eye-smile. "It's not that bad, Sasuke-kun. She's not as bad as you thought, and that kind of shook you, right?" Again 'Hnnn...' "Don't worry about it. She can take care of herself, she just needs to believe in herself, not her fantasies. She's going to be a very dependable team mate in time. And you like it."

"Whatever. She's smart, I'll give her that, but unless she stops wasting her time, me and Naruto are going to leave her behind. Besides, it's not as if I'd _ever_ take her as my girlfriend..."

"Oh? So you already have one in mind, eh?" Kakashi poked at his student, chuckling when he saw the rising blush. "Remind me to buy you a round of drinks when you get your first kiss. Though, I could give you some advice on what to do, Icha Icha has all the tricks you'd ever need to win the girl of your dreams."

"I'm no pervert, Kakashi-sensei." He denied the offer, but Kakashi smiled knowingly when he spotted Sasuke's eyes drifting to his ninja pouch, where his important perverse treasure was stored.

Yes! Another will soon be converted into the Pervertedness! Then, after the boys master the art of the Icha, the girls will follow, and the world will be perfect in its Icha-Icha!

Mwahahahaha!

May the pervertedness be with Sasuke and bring forth a new day of Icha-Icha, bigger, longer and more perverted than EVER!

Ahem, back to reality and away from the daydreams of a 25 year old virgin...

Eventually, Sakura settled for giving Naruto a noogie, having enjoyed the whole game far too much to keep being angry at him.

"So, how come you leapt like that out of the woods Naruto?" Asked Kakashi. "Come think of it, you were holding on some leaves, weren't you?"

Naruto quickly recovered from where he had been nursing his head, excitedly pulling out a scroll and opening it up in front of his curious team. On it, Kakashi could see a breakdown on elemental chakra and what each chakra did best. Lightning: Piercing. Wind: Cutting/Pressure. Fire: Absolute destruction (Sasuke smirked when he read this). Water: Flexibility and control of movement. Earth: Toughness, rigidity.

"Zabuza-san didn't teach me all that much, not even a jutsu, the cheapskate." Came Naruto's grumble as he spread out the scroll, showing diagrams of how each individual chakra would react with leaves, even going so far as to speculate on other, rarer types of leaves and plants. "But, he did show me a few things, how to make my chakra mimic elemental chakra. He said, I was almost there, almost had it down, he just had to show me how to do it right. Doesn't mean I can use elemental chakra any better, except for wind of course, but I can make my chakra mimic each energy's properties."

Then he pushed it to the side, opening another one, this one showing a breakdown of a few of his jutsu. "I use wind a lot, so it's easy to apply it, but I didn't want wind for this, I wanted something else. Luckily, Zabuza-san knew how to mimic both water and earth-type chakra. Now, watch this:" He said and gathered up some leaves before sticking a finger in and pulling out a chain. "This is what I showed you when we learned the tree-walking, right? So, here's what happens when I mimic water." Sasuke's sharingan showed that the chakra turned a darker blue, almost viscous shape and filled each leaf. Then, the entire chain seemed to take on movement. "It's not perfect yet, of course, I can't make it hurt anyone with significant force, but I _can_ make help any movements I'm already, physically, making, as well as hold on to each leaf better, kind of like super glue!"

"So... you made a whip out of leaves..." Kakashi mumbled. Well, it had its niche but... wait, why was Naruto grinning?

"Whip? Oh no, that wouldn't do at all. Remember, I've practiced with wind-type chakra a lot, I can give it an edge as well as keep it as a whip, so it can still cut pretty well. But, Kakashi-sensei, what would happen, if I changed from water, to earth?" He grinned deviously and demonstrated, causing the leaves flow closer to his hand, often making several layers and ending up in a straight, double-edged sword protruding from his fist, complete with a few leaves wrapped around his hand as a form of extra protection. "With just a little bit of change and some good old chakra manipulation, you change your whip into a sword! And back again!" He grinned, taking out yet another scroll, after he let his jutsu fade, this one having various handseal positions and what each did. "Admittedly, I did it seal-lessly because I know how it works, and I have way too much chakra, enough to spare. The hardest part is in fact finding out a seal that conforms to water's flexible control, as well as earth's rigid toughness. Turns out... there is no such seal!" He finished, snapping the scroll shut.

"So?" Sakura prompted.

"So, I made a new one!" His reply got a ludicrous look from his entire team, not to mention several mumbles, or in Sakura's case cries, of impossibility. They only got a raised eyebrow in return. "What, why is it impossible? Because nobody else does it? Did chakra just illuminate us with the right place to put our fingers for each handseal? Did the Kamis come down and tell us we have to do it in a specific way? No! People _experimented_, they tried and failed and tried again until they _made _it work!" He shrugged his shoulders. "Of course, not everybody has the ability to make a thousand clones and have them run through a variety of completely random hand placements of possible handseals and then record their effect on chakra, but then again, nobody's as awesome as me!" He finished with a grin.

Poor, poor Kakashi.

At age nine he had already made a powerful assassination technique... that couldn't be used unless you belonged to a specific clan and had a very specific bloodline activated.

And all this time, all these years that he had spent copying techniques and perfecting his arts... he had never, not _once_, tried to repeat that feat of his youth. For almost two decades, he had simply sat down on his success of his past and didn't take a single step forward.

_"Is this... is this how it feels, when you let yourself down? Is this how it feels when you get the good kick needed to get on your second gear?"_ He wondered, not for the first time.

Next to him, Sasuke didn't know if he should be happy or envious. He was happy that Naruto was getting stronger, the dobe worked his ass off for it, he deserved it. But, he was also envious; Naruto had defeated Haku, he had made so many new jutsu, he had probably even made a whole new freaking breakthrough in chakra control!

It was a bittersweet feeling. He didn't like it. His hands clenched a bit. Fine, if _that's_ how it's going to be... well, fuck it all, it's time to up his training some more! Can't have the dead last surpassing him now, can he?

Last but definitely not least, in her mind at least, Sakura was gazing at Naruto with newfound respect. So far, she had believed that either someone taught him these techniques or he had simply lucked out. He _did_ have the devil's luck sometimes.

But this? This was no luck; this was research, this was spending hour after hour, painstakingly writing down your findings, cross-referencing them and finding out exactly why something ticked the way it did and what you could do to mess with it.

Though few knew of it, that's exactly how Orochimaru worked, this is how he gained the ability to perform techniques that no one else could. Because, similar to Naruto, he wasn't satisfied with whatever everybody else told him was possible and denied what was considered 'the correct way', making his own path. Only, somewhere along the way, he misplaced his ethics. But the man was a researcher first and, had he known, had _anyone_ known, just how similar those two were, maybe things would have gone different. But right now, not even Orochimaru's top spies knew what or who Naruto really was.

And so, Konoha's most recent obsessively insane chakra researcher instead chose to follow the path he had realized he was walking when he met Haku for the first time. He would not let any harm come to his beloved precious people.

Far, far away, several people had felt a chill crawl up their spines when the Kyuubi jinchuuriki had made his vow to two other like-minded people.

But for now, he would happily spend his days learning and inventing jutsu as well as tending his ever-friskier pretties. He couldn't say he was surprised; they were always unpredictable when it was pollination time. At least, his own pet project had gone well, his memories from his clones assured him that he had done as he had asked. Hopefully, he would be able to hasten the growth a bit with some special aids. It would lessen the quality of the final product, sure, but if he could get even a tenth of what he had calculated...

Who knew, it could even be ready for the Chuunin Exam selections! Really, he knew what it was, he was greatly interested in getting the Kage's hat, so of course he had looked at whatever way there was to getting there fast, but Sakura was so easy to rile up sometimes.

"Focus you damn idiot!" Sasuke's voice pulled Naruto from his reverence, only a second before a kick caught him on the side of his head, sending him rolling head over heels.

Oh, right, this was taijutsu practice time. Or, as Sasuke called it more aptly; 'Beat-up-Naruto-time'.

"Alright, stop, stop, that's enough." Kakashi's voice provided relief to a bruised black-and-blue Naruto, sprawled at the ground, twisted around like a pretzel, with Sasuke practically yawning on him. "Are you alright Naruto?"

"It's just a flesh wound..." Came the groan.

"Yeah, well, I didn't think you were quite _that_ bad in taijutsu... Anyway, I got a few ideas for now, want to hear my advice?"

"Sure, better what anything _I_'ve thought, for sure."

"Alright, Naruto, you have unreal endurance and toughness. You took all of Sasuke's blows," Here Naruto muttered 'like I had a choice', still annoyed he was _that_ bad at taijutsu. Or maybe Sasuke was just _that_ good. "and your reaction time and agility are alright, but your strength and speed are subpar; you have the muscle for it, but you don't know how to best put it to use, so all your strength is wasted and causes you to overextend. You need a style that allows you to avoid enemies and move quickly; no matter how much you train, you'll never be a great taijutsu fighter, but you're a ninjutsu-type anyway, right?"

"Yeah, and if I could use a leg-based one, I'd still have my hands mostly free. I may be able to use my own jutsu without seals out of combat, but while fighting, it would be almost impossible beyond the simplest moves."

"Too true, you've done a great job with the Kawarimi, but there's a reason it's considered a basic technique; there's not really many jutsu that are easier to use. So, I scoured my library, pulled a few strings, blackmailed a few people" He said nonchalantly, "And got some styles to choose from. Some taijutsu masters go for multiple styles or combine them to get a better one, you shouldn't try something like that, it's just going to confuse your body with conflicting instincts."

"Hm. Alright, but whatever you teach me, you teach to Sasuke as well." Naruto replied after a second of thought, getting surprised looks from his team. "What? If we both know the same things, he'll know what I'm about to do and complement my own style. Besides, the teme's got the right instincts and stuff for taijutsu, right? One more style should be fine, right?"

"Would it really help me, sensei?" Sasuke really did want to learn, he wanted to learn as much as possible, but Kakashi's warning about not learning more than one style crossed his mind. Learning more was good, messing up what you already know wasn't.

"Yes, Sasuke, you are a budding taijutsu genius. Well, so far I've seen, you're a genius in all arts, but taijutsu and weapons are your best. You've got a good head on your shoulders, great instincts, proper conditioning and years of practice. Your sharingan also gives you the reflexes to fight with ease even in grappling distances. I'll help you refine your control and awareness, but you still have your Uchiha clan scrolls, right? You won't need me to add much to your jutsu arsenal, but of course you can ask me any time for help, ideas or advice. But, unlike Naruto and Sakura, you have material to start on."

Then he turned to his last student. "Speaking of the sole female of our team..." He grinned at the half-hearted glare Sakura shot him. "Taijutsu will do you good, but we'll focus more on evasion than anything else, for now. I dug for some medic scrolls from a friend of mine, too," _Oh, Miho-chan, the ever-naughty nurse... _"_ahem_, and I'll be showing you a few genjutsu to see what you can do best. Then we'll see. Not like we'll be able to improve too much before the exams are here."

"If we won't be improving too much until then, why _are_ we being invited?" Asked Sasuke.

"Ah, caught on to that, eh? Simple; you can't grow if you do the same thing over and over again. Facing ninja of other countries will give you a very good idea of what's going on. Also, you've already had a meeting with the world outside, so you three are much better off than the other gennin teams; they've only done a C-rank or two, you have an A-rank under your belt. And last but not least, it's safe; the exams will take place in Konoha this time. You'll be much safer here for your first time rather than somewhere else. And if you pass? Well, you pass." He grinned at them, before making a handseal very familiar to Naruto and making two clones. "Split up now, time to train!"

And so it was that Team Seven had their first meeting with ANBU Captain Hatake Kakashi, realizing how much of a slave driver he is underneath his relaxed facade.

Really, the ANBU had thrown a party when he left. One even then ROOT had joined too...

Several hours of grueling hard work later, an exhausted Team Seven was making their way back home, leaning on each other for support, lest they fell on the ground. Not even Naruto would have the energy to get back up if that happened. Dropping off Sakura with a mumble of 'bye's and a shaking hand barely rising up enough to hit the doorbell, the last two members trudged on, hating the fact that their houses were so far away from their training grounds.

Finally reaching that intersection where their paths split, Sasuke was struck by inspiration. "Naruto... come stay with me tonight."

Now, there was a great deal many things the blonde could have said, and so he did. "My, Sasuke-kun!" He said, fluttering his eyes at his friend. "How straightforward of you! But you should at least have taken me on a date!" He would have shifted to his alter-ego, Naruko, too, but he didn't have enough chakra for it. Damn Kakashi and his training! Such a good opportunity to embarass his friend, and he couldn't even take advantage of it!

"Shut up dobe, you're too short for my liking anyway." Came the snark, and grin, from the Uchiha. "Besides, my home's closer, less walking for you, the way I see it."

"Oh, and what's in it for you, except the honor of basking in my presence?"

"You'll cook breakfast. And I get to have someone sleep over, dad would have had a stroke it's not an Uchiha, but what can we do? I'll have to make do with _you_." The last word was delivered with an overexaggerated sneer, barely managing to hide the grin behind it.

As the two gennin made their way, they didn't notice a rather acid-tongued, gossip-loving civilian eavesdropping on them. The woman didn't have the best hearing though, nor was she all that good of a judge of people, so most of their words were taken in a completely different context.

Itachi would later find the rumours hilarious, as would Naruto. Sasuke on the other hand was much less amused, at least until he realized that it saved him from approximately ninety-nine percent of his fangirls. He threw a party after that.

But, in the safety and emptiness of the old Uchiha district, Sasuke and Naruto were enjoying a very late dinner of cup ramen. Sasuke would have rather had something else, but he didn't have the energy to make something, so he let Naruto just boil some so they wouldn't sleep.

"So, why didn't you tell me about Zabuza-san's teaching you?" Asked Sasuke, the question annoying him.

"Not like you asked." Naruto grinned, but quickly turned serious, all signs of his usual chipper smugness gone. "He didn't teach me all that much anyway. I still can't use elemental jutsu beyond the basics of wind, if that's what you're worried about. I can just mimic what elemental chakra does, but it's not all that good of a mimicry either. Wastes too much chakra for now, I think. Hell, the only reason I can do this with leaves is probably because Mokuton, the bloodline that creates living wood, is a mixture of Earth and Water..." Naruto speculated. He had researched on it, of course. If he wanted to use unique jutsu, it would have been much easier if he could at least use some legendary styles, like the Mokuton or Jinton. That and, what if his manipulation of leaves alluded to having such a bloodline? He would go from Konoha's Demon Brat to an almost prince-level, as heir to the Senju.

It would have also given him a family, even if it was only one person.

However, his chakra testing showed that he had not one shred of Mokuton in him. Too bad, really, but it wouldn't stop him.

"I... see... So you wouldn't be able to use fire or electricity through them?"

"Well... fire would just burn the leaves, so yeah, I could, but it would at the same time reduce the leaves I can use, meaning that it would weaken all my other jutsu. Not a good idea I think. Besides, I'm Wind natured, fire's not my area of expertise, you're the team's pyro." Both of them grinned at that. "And electricity? Well, water could channel it, so I guess I could... but it's an element opposed to my wind so I doubt I'd ever learn enough about it to put to use." Naruto shrugged there.

"Ah, I see... So, Zabuza?"

"Well, I showed him what I was doing and he just helped me focus the effect without wasting as much chakra as I did." He shrugged again. "So, anyway," His insanely happy look returned. "can I interest you in one of my pretties? They'll behave too! I think..."

"Err... no. Not that good with plants, pyromaniac tendencies, remember?" Well, whatever worked to get away from taking care of one of Naruto's pretties.

After that, they descended into a calm quiet, relaxing simply in the presence of each other. They only spoke when they were retiring for the night, Naruto on one of the many beds of the house.

"Sasuke, catch." He tossed him a small scroll. "Start reading on it. It'll come in usefull later on, trust me." It was a scroll with the proper chakra manipulations needed to mimic water and earth chakra. And it would come in handy soon. As soon as his special order was finished anyway. Should be ready by the end of the Chuunin Exams. Too bad it wouldn't be done earlier, but, oh well, high quality requires a long time to acquire.

"Hn... G'night, dobe." And they were out like a pair of lights.

The following days rolled by much the same, waking up, training hard, having lunch, training some more and collapsing to their beds for the night. But there was marked increase in their skills as Kakashi seemed to pull all the stops from training them. Well, not _all_ the stops, he still made sure to withhold quite a bit of training, he couldn't let them get too powerful yet, they didn't have the kind of bonds with the village to not be one-hundred percent safe from abandoning it, but he still cared for the brats.

To Kakashi, they were all so familiar to his old team, yet so different. Sakura was so much like Rin, but at the same time so different. At least he was safe from his old team-mate's legendary wrath; Sakura seemed to hold his position as teacher in great respect, Rin was never really bothered by their ninja ranks. Sasuke and Naruto though were his favourites. Gods, these brats were amazing. Naruto had enough chakra to rival the entire village and the willpower to match, while Sasuke was an absolute genius, it was like he absorbed techniques like a sponge to water. So, he trained these two hard; Naruto was forced to learn Taijutsu along with the chakra control excercises he had started him on, also making a single clone to match Naruto's 'Idea-Cataloguing Squad' (Naruto chose the name), helping the doppelgangers come up with new ideas for old techniques and brand-new techniques to work on.

Kakashi had found himself surprised by some of the blonde's insane ideas, even if most of them were niches, tricks that would be great for a very specific case or situation, rather than something more generic. Still, he had found more than a couple of viable, useful ideas in Naruto's many scrolls that he would have to work on.

Truthfully, even Sasuke had found a nice trick or two he could use with his Katon, but he wasn't like Naruto, he wasn't that good in making jutsu from scratch (he just wanted his target to burn), so he swore he would get that damn dobe to make him some fire techniques worthy of an Uchiha! Then they would all burn! Buuurn! Mwahahaha- ahem... That is to say, Sasuke's pyromaniac tendencies were also getting looked at.

Of her team, Sakura was the least happy of them; her studies in genjutsu and iryojutsu (healing techniques) were taking up a significan amount of time in studying, time she could not use to go after her beloved Sasuke-kun. That is not to say she didn't see him, but the only time she did was when Kakashi was running them into the ground, meaning there was no time to just look at him and sigh dreamily.

But, today was the day. Not just any day, but _the _day. The day that signified the beginning of the Chuunin Exams, a bi-annual event that was hosted by a different major ninja village each time. Through, in three different and successive stages, young, promising and upcoming gennin would compete to see who would gain a promotion to Chuunin, bringing honor and clients to their village in a show of power and superiority.

Needless to say, nearly every competing gennin was bursting with anticipation at the event. Except Shino. He's always calm.

So now they walk the path to the Academy, where the first part will take place, Sasuke and Sakura trying to comfort an inconsolable Naruto that no, written tests are not evil and they do not in fact each people's souls.

Naruto would, of course, disagree.

But, other than that, they are also making fun of the blonde thanks to his mini-me; a young boy named Sarutobi Konohamaru and his two friends, Udon and Moegi, who want to be 'just like Naruto-nii-san'. The boy had even almost made the mistake of speaking out about Sakura's forehead, but it just took Naruto's warning that she did in fact pack a mean punch and she wasn't afraid to use it (something he had learned for himself several times over after becoming teammates) to stop the possible slaughter.

Not that it stopped the kids; being children they would run ahead of the trio, making ridiculous antics, issuing challenges or just making fun of the people around them.

It was just after the little ones had dashed around a corner, trying to get Naruto and his team to spot them 'if they could', when they heard a light _thud_, two "ow!"s and a "You damn brat!"

Turning around the corner they saw poor Konohamaru raised off the ground by his scruff and a weird guy holding said scruff. The guy was really weird, he would give anyone a run for their weirdness; purple lines on his face, a weird cat-like jumpsuit (only lacked the paws really) and an even more weird coffin-shaped thing covered in bandages and placed on the back.

"I should hurt you, just so you learn not to piss off those superior to you!" Spouted the black-dressed guy.

"Oh yes, because hitting little kids makes you _so_ superior, make-up-chan!" Naruto said with a sneer. He had been on the receiving end of bullying too many times not to grasp the chance to show a bully how it feels. "Now, your hand will let go of my friend or I'll **cut it off**!" He growled menacingly.

"Oi Kankuro, let go of the brat, if we're late _he_'ll get angry again." Spoke up a very attractive girl next to the now-known 'Kankuro' guy. Dressed in a short battle kimono, fishnet and carrying a huge fan, the four-ponytailed girl made for a much more serious (and attractive) sight than her team mate.

"Oh yeah? What do I care? These weaklings challenged me first!"

_'Weaklings? We're weaklings? Ha! I'd like to see them so much as look at Zabuza!'_ Thought Sasuke, but outwards only scowled and grunted at them, his hands slowly inching to his favourite pair of knives. "Hn."

"Riiight, you're picking on kids half your age and _we_'re the weaklings? Then again, what do would you expect from a queer make-up-loving coward!"

That insult seemed to be too much for the cat-suit-guy and he dropped Konohamaru, preferring to go for a quick punch on the insulting blonde...

Only to hit a cloud of smoke and air.

"Oops, missed me! Want to try again? Oh, this one was close! My, my, kanky-chan! Are you getting angry?" Teased Naruto, subtly using the Mori Yuurei to replace himself with innocently-floating leaves, leaving the poor guy spinning, punching and almost frothing.

"WHY YOUUU!" He screamed, setting down the bandaged object-

"Stop. Kankurou." A cold voice informed them, making everyone look at the speaker, a weird, red-haired boy wearing red-and-black robes and carrying a gourd. There was the kanji for 'love' on his forehead and his teal-colored eyes had black rings around them.

It was like a switch had been turned. Both unknown ninja (they looked like gennin, but Kakashi-sensei looked laidback when he was really a slave driver) seemed to shiver with barely-restrained terror as they turned to look at the new speaker.

Only a few seconds of pinning everyone under cold, deadly eyes, the red-haired one seemed to surround himself with sand and then vanish, only to appear at the street, in between Naruto and Kakurou.

"G-Gaara..." The blonde girl stuttered, still shivering in fear. "R-relax, we... we were on our way..."

"Temari. Shut up or I will kill you." It was emotionless, lethal, cold, dark and _somewhat familiar_ to both Naruto and Sasuke, for different reasons each. Then, the 'Gaara' turned to the Konoha shinobi. "Apologies. My siblings are stupid. Who are you?"

"Uzumaki Naruto! And blondie there isn't stupid, just the make-up lover guy!" He said, much to the chagrin of Temari and the gulping of Kankurou at Gaara's newest glare.

"Uchiha Sasuke. There is no problem, but where are you going? You are no Konoha shinobi, your headband indicates Suna. Here for the Chuunin Exams?"

Sakura however chose to stand back, make herself as small a target as possible. It wasn't fear, so much as shock; after Zabuza, few people could scare her like he did, but the fact that a boy near her age _could_ was... Besides, what could she do? She's pointless in direct combat and Sakura is keenly aware of it; even Naruto can eventually beat her in taijutsu, even if just by way of his endless stamina (though he had been markedly improved lately). No, best to lay back, watch and help her team as best as she can, which is _not_ by getting into the fray.

"Yes. We are here to take the exams. You are entering them too." It was a statement. "You are strong. I look forward to meeting you both there. When we do, I will kill you." Then, sand rose around the three siblings from Suna and they were gone.

"Well, ain't he a basket of sunshine?"

"Yes, such a nice, _caring_, personality. Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside." Sasuke mocked. He was surprised just as much, if not more than, Sakura. Those eyes were familiar. Very familiar, though old in memory...

_Itachi's eyes..._

It was an uncomfortable silence that dampened the moods of Team Seven as they made their way inside the one building they had uniformly hoped to never enter again.

Just a few flights of stairs ahead of them, there was a lot of commotion, shouts of pain, curses and even some pleading. Naturally, the members of Team Seven went to investigate, finding the very doorway they were looking for, 301, literally flooded with prospective chuunin being held back by a pair of bullies.

What cinched it for them however was the sound of pain coming from a girl that was quickly thrown to the floor.

"Eeeh! What weaklings! Pathetic loosers like you shouldn't even be _considered_ for Chuunin!" One of the two bullies said, one with X-shaped bandages over his nose. "We're doing you a favour, really! So you better thank US!" And then, he was moving to kick the downed girl.

His leg didn't make it as he found a leg stomping on his other one, and a hand clamping down on his throat.

"If this is what amounts to worthy chuunin, I'd rather be a rogue, _coward_." Naruto hissed, tightening his grip.

The other one however did not stand idle, he quickly made to kick the blonde, but blinking in surprise as he found his own leg pinned to the wall behind him by a rather annoyed Sasuke.

"And you're not really all that strong are you?" Sneered the Uchiha in absolute disgust. "Not even your genjutsu is that strong; 301? Are you stupid? We only went _two_ flights of stairs, not three! This is the _second _floor class, 201."

Around them, prospective gennin gasped and released the illusion that had tricked them, making the numbers swirl back to their original. A second later, the one Sasuke had pinned down had leapt up and over the boy and was coming back at him with a quick kick. Not that Sasuke remained standing of course, as soon as his target had leapt, he too spun and was ready to interfere... when two hands grabbed the two legs and stopped them in their tracks.

"You should not fight so close to the exam, you know" The boy with the shiny black bowl-shaped hair cut spoke, large, bug-like eyes looking out. "You could get expelled."

Sasuke sneered as he retracted his leg calmly. The green-dressed boy was good, his taijutsu was almost on par with his. But he looked _ridiculous_. "Whatever." Compared to this guy, Kankurou or whatever his name was, looked almost _normal_!

What followed then was a declaration of love from the bowl-haired boy towards one Haruno Sakura, prompting the pinkette to hide behind a rather amused, almost snickering, Sasuke. Until he took pity to her anyway and asked the 'sexual harasser' to stop traumatizing his team mate.

Unnoticed by them all, except maybe a certain boy with long black hair and pupil-less white eyes and his chocolate-eyed, brown-haired female team mate, Naruto was whispering to the other bully. "I'm ashamed at you two, really. What were you thinking, placing a genjutsu here? The prank's nowhere near funny and you didn't even think to use paint? Genjutsu can be broken, but if you had just replaced the damn sign, no one would have known! Is that how I taught you to prank people?" The captive ninja had even the good grace to look sheepish before being freed and taking his partner, vanishing in a swirl of leaves.

Unfortunately for the blonde he had missed the goings-on, which had included someone hitting on Sakura, someone copying Sasuke's haughty demeanor and a rivalry-challenge.

Really, the blonde thought, normality may be over-rated, but sometimes it's just too much. So, he turned to the lone girl of the opposing trio. "How do you bear with them? No offence, they're crazy and you're pretty normal... not that I have anything to say about normal, even my pretties think I'm crazy, and they're _plants_ for gods' sake!"

The girl giggled and introduced herself as 'Tenten', no last name which is weird, but Naruto thought that, hey, she could be embarassed about it or maybe she was adopted and didn't know where she came from. The stick-up-the-mud-guy-number-two was Hyuuga Neji, apparently a prodigy as a Hyuuga, to what Naruto snickered. The guy was a Hyuuga alright, he'd pranked them enough. Nah, Neji was no prodigy, he was a genius, to be sure, but no prodigy; he was a textbook Hyuuga, no innovation that one! The green leotard wearing, bowl-haired, bug-eyed boy was called Rock Lee, though Naruto quickly re-christened him as 'Eyebrows' or 'Geji-mayu'. Really, the blonde thought, it might be wrong for guys to dabble in the make-up arts, but it's even _worse_ having caterpillars for eyebrows! They even wiggled like real!

A few minutes after that, Sasuke was nursing his jaw. He had taken Rock Lee's challenge... and had gotten his ass handed to him. The man was _good_. Lee might look like a clown, act like an idiot and dress like a retard, but he damn sure knew his taijutsu. Even with the sharingan, he had barely seen him move and, had it not been for pracicing with Haku, he would have been smacked around silly. Even then, Lee was so fast, that his body couldn't react in time, bypassing his blocks as if they weren't even there! Only his last resort technique had saved him from total embarassment; Katon: Hishu, or Fire Style: Fire Flash, a spat-out tiny fireball that goes off in a bright flash like a minature firework. No damage, but also no handseals needed, which makes it for a nasty surprise up close. Thanks to that, Sasuke did manage to give Lee a few good hits, but the crazy gennin seemed almost as tough as, if not tougher than, Naruto!

Sasuke would not deny wondering for a second if insanity somehow also made someone tougher. If their detachment for reality somehow made them impervious to damage; were they simply incapable of understanding that, after a point in time, it should be impossible to keep getting up? Like their body sends them a memo of 'you're in deep fucking pain right now' and they _miss_ it!

A few moments after that coherent thought, Sasuke would also admit that, since his crazy is different from Naruto's crazy, then he should have different abilities or something. Did anyone even catalogue these crazies?

Unfortunately for the Last Uchiha Scion, no one did, and so he missed on all these abilities insane ninja seem to be getting. That, or Lee eventually shook off the stars from his eyes and the proceeded to, quite simply, beat Sasuke black and blue. He even went so far as to use a forbidden technique, one that started with a kick under his chin, throwing him in the air and then appearing right under him, floating in his shadow. Sure, it was an idea place to start an attack, but what about that technique could be so dangerous that called for the jounin-sensei to interrupt it?

Well, then there was the sensei that reminded Sasuke he should really, _really_ find some brain bleach. Two males dressed in skin-tight green leotards and hugging each other under a sunset, complete with crashing waves...

"Oi Naruto..." Sasuke turned to his friend, still testing his jaw to make sure everything was here. "Do you have some left-over brain bleach? That guy was..."

He got a shudder in return. "Nah, and doubt it would work on you, magic copycat eyes, remember? I guess that teaches you to not keep them active _all_ the time."

That left poor Sasuke grumbling all the way to the examination room. Which was after a short talk with Kakashi supplemented by a sympathetic look of pity and an admission that they were better off than him, since he had somehow managed to get Maito Gai, Rock Lee's jounin-sensei, to consider him a 'youthful rival'.

No, Sasuke was sure that if Lee had called him his 'eternal rival', he would have seriously considered sepukku. Because, after Kakashi's explanation that this specific pair of ninja simply didn't seem to accept the fact that someone was better than them, he was quite pleased with himself for loosing. No, best loose a fight than have that self-styled 'Beautiful Green Wild Beast' after them for life!

Infinitely better!

Entering the examination room was... eventful. Ino tried to tackle Sasuke, Sasuke replaced himself with a willing Sakura (she let him substitute her for himself before realizing the reason), Kiba howled with laughter, almost crushing poor Akamaru as he rolled on the floor, Hinata quietly giggled and Shikamaru and Chouji looked at each other before snickering.

Shino was cool, as always.

Naruto preferred to mumble about his pretties, using the covert signal system Kakashi had helped them create to communicate without anyone understanding them. The fact that everybody also underestimated the blonde as being completely insane and therefore helpless was just an added benefit. Really, for a village filled with ninja, nobody ever tried to see underneath the underneath.

Someone approached the group then, a guy with silver-grey hair and round specs, meekly warning them. "Err... you might want to calm down you know... People here are getting really agitated..."

Looking around them, they noticed that nearly the entire room was glaring at them, so Naruto, being Naruto, decided to send them over the deep end, en masse.

"Agitated! Aggravated! Insanely introverted!" He leaped up, screaming accusingly, while on a desk, pointing at them, insanity clear in his eyes. "I know your kind! You're here for my pretties aren't you! I know you are! Admit it!" One of the poor onlookers tried to speak, but wasn't given the chance. "Silence! I don't need your excuses! Listen up all you, flower-stompers and tree-cutters! Knaves and maids alike! Ye who bear the honor of being a shinobi to your little, itty-bitty, treeless villages! You got a problem with my pretties, bring it to me! Not my pretties! And if you think you can take on my pretties, well, lemme tell you, they will rip out your hearts and serve them with mayonnaise!" An onlooker interrupted the 'crazy guy' by saying something like _"you're crazy!"_ Which only prompted Naruto puff up, not unlike a peacock and yell out, even louder. "Crazy? THIS! IS! KONOHAAAAA!" He finished with a loud warcry before abruptly calming down, dusting off some imaginary dust from his clothes, straightening them out and, with obviously exaggerated arrogance, leapt back down to the ground. "Alright, you may proceed with the examinations."

It took almost all of Sasuke's considerable self-control to not burst down in loud guffaws, but just looking at the stupefied faces of his fellow shinobi, friend and foe alike, was almost too much to bear! Ah, that idiot, with just a loud show, he made everyone doubt his sanity and focus on himself rather than the examinations.

Amongst the Suna siblings, the blonde girl, Temari smirked. "Oooh, I _like_ him. Can I keep him as a pet, Gaara? Pwease?" She gave the puppy-eyes to her emotionless little brother, while her other little brother's eye twitched and he mumbled something about 'oh great, now there's two of them'. Temari chose to ignore him.

With Team Gai, poor Lee looked dumbfounded by everyone else's reaction; Naruto-san definitely had strong fires of youth, why did they look so wierded out about? It was an inspiring speech! Silently, he swore to himself to keep a better eye on the blonde, he might get his eternal rival yet! Tenten on the other hand had trouble preventing her giggles, especially as she looked at a horrified Neji's face; the poor 'genius' looked ready to have an aneurism at just being of the same village as Naruto!

A silver-haired gennin on the other hand looked at his special pack of ninja information cards and reconsidered ranking Naruto's intelligence ratings above that of a goldfish. With a quick wave of his hand, and quite a bit of chakra control, he re-wrote the information to plainly show that the subject in question was an insane idiot with absolutely no talent or use, obviously having gotten there on Sasuke's capabilities. The rumours that the blonde had some sort of special technique were also apparently false; no one that stupid could _possibly_ have made a technique! Still, he coughed slightly, getting everyone's attention, the show must go on after all. "Ahem, yes, that _is_ one way of reacting to it. I'm sorry, I haven't introduced myself, Yakushi Kabuto, gennin. Here to take the exams, I suppose eh? Are all of you green gennin?"

"We're not _green_," Interrupted Naruto out of nowhere, somehow surprising everyone that they had managed to already forget him. "I'm _orange_! Praise be to The Orange! It's up there, with Ramen and The Log, in Divinity! Truly there be no higher forces in the universe!"

Ignoring the blonde, who continued to praise ramen, the Orange and The Log, urging those around him to pray to the so-called 'Divine Trinity', Kabuto soldiered on. "I mean, you're new here, right? I'm, well, it's kind of embarassing, but I'm a veteran of these exams... They're very hard, I've taken them seven times and still I can't pass..."

The admission was delivered perfectly, well enough to receive any actor's award. But... Sasuke didn't buy it. Having spent nearly half a year next to the insane blonde, he had learned how to tell when people hid something, his best (maybe only but still best) friend did it with alarming frequency. That, compounded with reading his father's guides on how to read people, guides made so that beginning members of the Uchiha Police Force could tell when someone lied to them... It all pointed out to one fact; that Kabuto guy was lieing. Unfortunately, he wasn't good enough to be able to find out about what he lied or why, but he knew there was something fishy about it.

Maybe it was the veteran's way of calming the rookies down, or making them think he's an ally so he can defeat them later on, or maybe he has a different goal for the Exams. Sasuke didn't know about his reasons or goals. He _did_ know however that he couldn't and wouldn't trust the guy. Clenching and unclenching his fist in specific timings passed the message to Naruto 'Lies, no trust'. Said blonde didn't seem to lower his eyes from the ceiling, where he had been looking while _still_ praising Ramen, but a smal movement of the shoulders told Sasuke that he had received the message.

"Seven times? Man, you must be a weakling then!" Kiba's rowdy voice tried to insult Kabuto, not that the older gennin seemed to mind, if anything he took it in stride, which sent even more warning bells in Sasuke's head.

"Ah, yes, haha, that... that may be true," Kabuto admitted, laughing awkwardly, once again ignoring Naruto's cry of _"Repent infidels! Praise The Log in Its Loggedness!"_ and instead tried to move on. "but, you see, I have collected a great deal of information, so I'm confident I'll pass with the help of my nifo-" _"And the world shall unite under The Orange!"_ "Doesn't he have a goddamn off button?" He screamed, finally having no more patience.

Surprisingly, he got a sympathetic look from Sasuke, who clapped him on the shoulder. "Don't worry, only the first month or so is truly painfull, after that, you get used to him." There was an almost _palpable_ feeling of pain and humiliation. "But, you were saying something?"

Trying very hard, and still barely succeeding, to quell his desire to decapitate the crazed blonde, Kabuto smiled uneasily. "Yes, yes I was, wasn't I? I... I have these ninja info cards, or ninfo cards for short..." _"So The Ramen were born of salt and flour, the perfect unison..."_ "Grrr... ninfo cards, yes, cards with a great deal of information, about almost all participants of the Exams here."

"Oh? So you have information about all of us?" Sasuke asked, obviously curious, though he hid the reason why. When Kabuto nodded, he decided to take advantage of the veteran gennin, see what more information he can earn to store in his own mental personal folders. "So, there's someone named Gaara, he's from Suna, anything on him?"

"Gaara? Oh, you mean Sabaku no Gaara, son of the Kazekage, brother to one Sabaku no Temari, user of Wind jutsu, and one Sabaku no Kankurou, whose specialty is unknown but I think he knows how to use poisons." He smiled, thankfull that the blonde seemed to be involved into a weird, muttering prayer. He tried not to overhear, the very _words_ the blonde spoke hurt his ears!

Unknown to him, three particular gennin of an up-and-coming village were straining to keep their brains intact, the damn blonde's words were killing their brains!

"But, back to Gaara, wow! He's good, like, really good! He's taken part to B and even A ranked missions, completing them all without even a-"

_"So praise be to the Bright Orange for it lifted our spirits, the Tasty Ramen for it fed our stomachs and the Holy Log, for it saved us from painful deaths!"_ Screamed Naruto once again.

"scratch...WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO SAVE YOU FROM A FUCKING PAINFUL DEATH YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Unable to control himself any longer, Kabuto leapt at the blonde, frothing at the mouth and obviously trying to strangle the annoyance...

"STOP THIS AT ONCE!" A loud voice boomed from the end of the classroom, a tall, scarred man, wearing full body armor, boots and a large bandana on his head, surrounded by a dozen or so proctors. "I am Chief Interrogator Morino Ibiki! I am proctoring this exam and-"

_"And on the fifth day of the seventh month, Ramen shall come down from the Heavens to feed the devout!"_ Naruto's voice interrupted Ibiki. _"And there will be much rejoicing!"_ Then he just looked around, curiously, at everyone staring either at him (and his apparently house-sized steel balls) for ignoring Ibiki, or Ibiki (and his twitchi eye, seriously, that wasn't healthy) to see what kind of punishment he would dish out. Naruto, of course, was unperturbed. "Want to join the reciting of the Ramen Prophecies?"

Morino Ibiki stared. He stared hard. He was _not _glaring, he was _not _scowling. And he would _never_ pout. But this brat had ruined his dramatic entrance! He twitched, wishing to strangle a certain someone. Still, he would admit that this boy had big balls of steel, high quality too, none of that cheapskate stuff that 'noob' ninja buy. So, even though he wanted to take the little brat for a tour of his workspace, he had to respect him too. That, and he'd have to keep an eye on him, he'd seen the chaos he'd wrought. If he could get him into T&I (Torture and Interrogation), he'd be breaking the worst prisoners without even touching them!

But, in the verses of a great song, _the show must go on_, so he filed away these new information snippets and continued on. "Silence, unless you wish to be banned from Chuunin Exams for life. This is the first rule; Shut. Up. You _will_ be silent and respectful or I'm going to toss you out on your collective asses, am I understood? Good. This is a written exam. You all start at ten points and ten questions. For every time you cheat, you loose two points. For ever question unanswered, you will loose one point. If this exam finishes and you have no points left, you fail. This exam will last one hour. Those of you _smart_ enough to have read the tests," He sneered. "you will find that there are only _nine_ questions there. After forty-five minutes, I will give you the final question. Take your seats, _silently_, and we'll begin. Well, what the hell are you waiting for? MOVE!" He snapped, satisfied at making most leap to their seats.

The first stage was underway.

Naruto looked at his test and sighed. What the hell was wrong with these people? _'Calculate the vector of throwing a kunai with half-a-gram leaning towards the left-front axis, through a gust of wind with 43degrees bearing left in front of you and a circular funnel of wind, both at 10km per hour, at a moving target moving at 33km per hour bearing 21 degrees right, so as to hit in the inside of the calf... what the FUCK?'_ He glared at his sheet. Did they expect them to know this kind of useless stuff? First you throw a kunai and then you correct your aim!

Well fine, if that's how they want to play... _"I would attach an explosive note (initially hidden in the hollow compartment under my sandals so as to not be found) to the kunai, throw the kunai in the general direction of my target and use the __**Kunai Kage Bunshin no Jutsu**__, blanketing the area with explosive kunai; the resulting explosion will make sure that the target will not have a body left, let alone a leg."_ Well he's a combat-type ninja! He ain't no genius scribe or somesuch useless thing! He sighed, he had told them, _he had told them_, that this would happen! He had warned them but did they hear? Nooo! 'Tests don't suck your soul out Naruto!' they said, 'Yes Naruto, we're sure that they won't be using this as an opportunity to take your brains and replace them with slug-like parasites so they can take over our lives and conquer the world' they said!

Oh noes! They're going to eat their brains! Quickly, send out some leaves to Sasuke and Sakura! Warn them before it's too late!

Sasuke and Sakura found it truly hard to hold their laughter in as they saw a leaf float in front of their tests, writing Naruto's 'terrible truths revealed' in his regular style.

Next to Naruto however, Hyuuga Hinata giggled at his antics. She had looked at his eyes, going from a mesmerizing swirling tide, a chaotic mix between sky blue, sea deep blue and cloud white, spin and spin around, hypnotically, switching to a just as powerful perfect blend, though this one seemed to not move but instead _glow_ with willpower.

Not once had she seen fear in his eyes, not even once. Was it then, such a big surprise that she wanted to be like him? He had been through a lot, she had seen the few occasions where he was bullied just as harsh, if not harsher, than her. And not even the bullying, not even the threats, not even those cold, frigid, looks had deterred him. He still shone just as brightly as ever.

Some would say that Hinata was only crushing on him. She would not deny that, but she also knew that she had true feelings for him as well. She only had to gather up the courage to talk to him about them.

In time, the forty-five minutes passed, quietly as even Kiba refused to so much as let a peep out against the terrifying proctor. He did repeat to himself that it was because he didn't want to hurt his team's chances of passing, but Akamaru whined a 'liar' at him, though he let it drop.

"Alright now, brats, it's been forty-five minutes! Time for the tenth question!" he yelled, causing everyone to look at his stony face. "This one has two additional rules! Shut up, I'll answer later, if you interrupt me again, I'll show you just how good I am at my job. Now, the first rule is that you can choose whether or not you will take this question, but if you choose not to, then you fail the exam." He sent a glare at the poor boy that made to speak, instantly silencing him. "Don't like it? Don't care about you! Second rule is that if you fail this question, you are banned from Chuunin Exams for _life_!" He took a deep breath, knowing what would happen, and predictably many people made to shout. "**SILENCE!**" He yelled, using his 'aura of the dark lord' ability to quieten everything. "As I said; I don't give a fuck if you don't like it! It's just your bad luck that **I** am the examinations proctor his year." Another glare reinforced his points.

Now, Naruto wasn't someone to give praise or respect easily, he called the Hokage 'old man' for crying out loud, but this time, he had to admit; the man knew how to terrify them! Even he, Naruto, felt fear and uncertainty creep into him, and he had mouthed off at _Zabuza_! Looking to his right, seeing poor little Hinata shaking, he sighed. Time to bring out the crazies again!

Well, now that he thought about it, it wasn't so bad. So, he took a deep breath.

"INFIDEL! You bear not Orange, the Ramen has not granted you their exquisite taste and The Log has renounced youuu!" He yelled, pointing at a blinking Ibiki. "Repent! Repent at once I say! Oh, they speak to me! They talk to me! You are a liar, INFIDEL! The Log does not stand by your tactics of fear and terror! Repent! REPEEEENT!" He screamed, leg on his desk, looking just as insane as... well, every time he was alone. "Oh, the Ramen talks to me! They say you wear pink underwear! Shame on you! SHAME! SHAAAME!" Now the whole class was laughing and Ibiki was having a hard time holding down even his own chuckles. "The Log speaks once more! It says that I need no Chuunin to behold my dreams! A world united in The Orange's glow, The Ramen's taste and The Log's Loggedness! They have spoken! This is the Truth! The Absolute Truth! Rejoice for The Trinity has spoken!" Then he just fell right back to his seat, hands clenched together, speaking made-up words as prayers.

Three particular Gennin wondered if it really had been better to get some ear-plugs, despite the nature of their skills. Anything was better than hearing those... those... those _sounds_ coming out of the blonde's mouth! It was like a blasphemy against reality itself!

_"...Cthulu Iagh! Iagh! Iagh!"_

Still, Naruto's cries of infidels, logs, orange and ramen were enough to make the people calm down, the dark aura that Ibiki had unleashed on them broken. Some even began to think more clearly; what if they failed Konoha's exams? They would get tested in their own countries! Besides, did they really _have_ to be chuunin to get to their dreams? Ibiki himself was amused by the whole turn of events. Fine then, if that's the way it was... "No more leavers? Well, if that's the case, all who remain here... Pass!"

...aaand cue cries of disbelief, joy, question etcetera etcetera...

"**SILENCE YOU IDIOTS!**" Ibiki's voice boomed, instantly demanding respect and quiet. Except for desperate screaming of pain and suffering, but there was none of them there, unfortunately. "Yes, you all pass, do you even know why? Just fucking _luck_! Luck that helped you choose the right answer! Pathetic, you're not halfway to being proper chuunin so shut up, sit down AND LISTEN FOR A FUCKING CHANGE!" He barked at them, making the few who had stood up in complaints sit back down with an audible 'thud'. "When you are given a mission, you do _NOT_ have the right to refuse. You cannot back down from your enemy, regardless of danger! You have to go through, survive and protect your own village! But, this test was also about your intellect; no matter how strong you are, if you can't learn anything about your enemy, the _weakest gennin will have your collective asses_!" He then untied his bandana, revealing numerous scars on his bald head, torture scars. "This is what happens when you act like idiots. Use your brains and walk boldly, yet tread softly! This is the first step to becoming chuunin!"

"Awww, does it mean we get cool scars and stuff when we become a chuunin, or is it just for jounin? What about tattoos?" Guess who piped up, getting a grin from Ibiki, though whether it was bloodthirsty, proud or downright murderous, it wasn't exactly clear.

"Oh, I'm sure I could get you a few, even if you're a gennin, brat." He snarked, getting a toothy grin in reply. "Now, as you have passed this part of the exam, most likely due to sheer, dumb luck or more guts than brains, get ready for your second exam. It will weed out the children from the adults. It should start right about... now." He said, having known the second examiner's penchant for flashiness.

And of course for having an ANBU cast a genjutsu on said examiner so she would show up exactly when he wanted her.

Just then, something impacted a window, shattering it, and then seemed to explode open, four kunai pinning the corners of a huge black cloth on the blackboard, reading _ "Introducing the sexy and single, second Chuunin Exams proctor, Mitarashi Anko-sama!"_ Next thing everyone knew, a poof of smoke revealed the form of a truly sexy, if vulgar, woman with brown eyes, violet hair and gorgeous body. Unfortunately for most 'virgin boys' (Sasuke and Naruto not included), she only wore a short miniskirt, a fishnet top, metal shin guards, a trenchcoat and... well, just that really.

Kiba experienced a full octave drop in his voice. And a near dangerous loss of blood.

Akamaru just sighed on his pet's head.

Naruto on the other hand? He took out his test paper, scribbled a nine and held it over his head, shadow clones mimicking his actions only with different scores.

"Eh, a six?" Anko whined, catching on to the blonde's antics. Oh, she loved guys like this! She quickly sat down before said clone, leaning forward and letting him see more of her body. "I'm sure we could... work out a better score... m-a-s-t-e-r?" She whispered in her best, sultry voice, which is in fact _very_ effective.

The clone quickly took down his score, turned the paper around and put a 1 before the nine, now reading '19/10'.

The puple haired examiner smiled and placed her hands over her bust dramatically, sparing an amused look at the glaring Hyuuga next to her, "Oh my, is this for me? Why _thank_ you!" Then she leapt off the desk, landing next to a sighing Ibiki and grinned widely. "Call me in a couple of years, stud, I'd love to teach you a few things." Then, like a switch, she turned from seductively-playfull to murderingly-playfull. "Well, if you survive, if _any_ of you survive, because the next test is going to cut you down by at least half!" She gave everyone a gleefully sadistic look and hopped on the window sill. "Follow me and quickly. You snooze you loose, suckers!" The next moment she was gone, laughing as the poor gennin tripped over themselves to catch up to her.

Oh, beautiful chaos, how she loved it! Chaos, Chaos undivided!

Anko's laughter scared more than a few people, but only made Sasuke and Naruto grin.

In the end, Anko and her minions... err, entourage... ehm, subjects... umm... following mass of chuunin hopefulls, landed next to a large forest, separated from the rest of the world by a huge fence. On a nearby sign, the words 'Training Ground 44 - FORBIDDEN'.

"Welcome to your new examination area! For those of you who can't read, it's Training Ground Fourty-Four. Also known as the Forest of Death. The name's more literal than you think. Because in here, you will have a pretty darn good chance of dieing!" She grinned at them hungrily. "Yes, some of you will die, spilling all this beautiful, tasty, lovely blood, oh, how I wish I could be there with you..." She even _moaned_ at her own descriptions, successfully making several gennin look green.

Naruto couldn't help but agree; he wondered what blood ice cream tastes like.

"Now, since there's that chance of dieing, you're gonna have to sign these papers, saying that if you kick the bucket it's your own damn fault for being pathetic, so Konoha doesn't get suit by your crying mommies and daddies. After you hand in each form, your team will get a scroll, one of a pair. One is labled Earth, the other Heaven. You need both scrolls to advance as well as a full party of three. If even one of you can't reach the tower in the middle of the Forest in five days time, well, you better find your own way out 'cause no one's coming to save your sorry asses. Now, keep in mind the time limit and needing both scrolls, however you can't open any of these scrolls until you get to the tower, understood? If you do... well, let's just say that the tigers, snakes, giant spiders and giant bears here will have an extra lunch without having to chase you down. Final piece of advice; Don't. Die."

Sufficiently creeped out, scared witless and nauseus by the jounin, the hopeful chuunin made lines to get their death release forms and scroll, though unsurprisingly many of them chose to leave the exam right there and then.

Soon, Team Seven was standing in front of a gate, Sasuke hiding the scroll amongst his own supplies. Naruto had quickly agreed with the plan; he knew Sasuke was smarter than him, he must have had a reason to do this, right? Only, Naruto kneeled quickly, calling the other two.

The onlooking chuunin found himself staring surprised at an extremely precise map of the Forest Of Death, complete with the few gorges, lakes and even small hills it had.

"Alright, listen up, I know both of you are smarter than me, you even bother to think, I don't," He gave them a grin that caused the other two to laugh and roll their eyes. "But here, I have an advantage. I've been here before, quite a few times, and lemme tell you, there's a lot of problems ahead. Giant leeches, giant spiders, giant tigers, hell there's giant _mosquitoes_, that are going to eat us alive if we give them half a chance. So, we need to have constant lookouts, no exceptions." He had quickly turned grim as he added small details here and there. "I've probably gone over the entire place looking for more species to add to my pretties, there's a treasure trove in there, so I know how hard it can be in there, and it's _hell,_ trust me. Food's not an issue; if something glows, don't eat it. If something's red or yellow or black, don't eat it. If something still moves, stab it until it's _dead_. I once tried to hunt down a giant rabbit; the bastard almost ripped my head off my shoulders." He ignored the incredulous looks he got. "Sasuke, the tower the crazy lady spoke of is here." He marked it with a circle. "We're here." He marked another with an 'X'. "The easiest route to the tower is this." He drew a jagged line. "Not the shortest, but you avoid a couple giant spider nests and you go around the giant leeches." Sakura now looked ready to vomit. "Imagine leeches the size of your legs. Yes, I do think we should go around them. Now, on the first night in, I'll work on making you some maps so you can navigate. Other than that... well, you have the brains, I have the chakra."

"U-umm... Sasuke-kun?" Sakura hesitated to put an idea forth, he was still the boy she crushed on, she couldn't _hope_ to know better than him, right? "M-Maybe we could... take the shortest route to the Tower and camp there? We... we could, of course, take on any team we meet until there, but since we have Naruto, who knows the area, we could be there without much trouble even though everyone else would be tired. And... and... well, it's a individual-team event, but maybe we could work together with another Konoha team? Like... Like Ino's or Hinata's team?"

Sasuke 'hn'ed quietly and nodded. It was an adequate plan, for sure. "Anything else to add, Naruto?" He used his friend's name rather than insult to show how serious he was.

"Yes, one last thing; keep to the fucking trees and away from webs. Giant leeches move as fast as a large snail, so we can outrun them, and giant spiders stick to their nests, so we may at most have to face a couple of them, rather than a hundred. The tigers and bears though, and just about every big predator here, stick mostly to the ground. Only come down to forage for food, water and if the branches you're on break. No other reason."

The chuunin proctor quickly informed them that the doors would open soon and Naruto wiped out the map he had made on the ground. Team Seven stood by the doors when Anko's voice echoed loudly over the speakers; "Chuunin Exams, second phase, begin... NOW!" And the doors opened wide.

Two steps into the forest, Team Seven had already leapt for the trees, moving quickly and silently, as Kakashi had trained them.

"Hop, hop, hoppity-hop." Mumbled Naruto as his team leapt from branch to branch, only occasionally taking detours. For having not been there for a few months now (and considering how quickly everything seemed to change there, it was as if it was alive -which it _was_), his map was pretty darn accurate.

Suddenly, Sasuke leapt to the ground, panting. Weird, Naruto thought, Sasuke might not be nowhere near his own endurance, but he was pretty darn tough. So why... "Alright, let's take a break, all this jumping around like _rabbits _has tired me out."

Rabbits. Of course; the signal his team had made after their first encounter with Zabuza. Hidden enemy watching. Had their leader detected something out of the ordinairy?

"Naruto, can you get us something to eat? A quick breakfast, if you please?" Naturally, Sasuke would never ask Naruto to bring them food, even if they needed it despite carrying food capsules on them (as Kakashi had deemed it withing acceptable 'nice deed of the month' paramaters to tell them to prepare for a few days of hiking). No, there was another reason... Ah, of course!

"Sure! I think I saw some nice, thick, juicy mushrooms a few trees back! They glowed all pretty too! Hang on tight, I'm gonna get'em!" And he purposely stumbled all over himself to get the 'glowy mushrooms'.

In on the trick, Sakura leapt at Sasuke, cooing at him. "Aww, Sasuke-kun! How smart of you to send the idiot off! Really, he's so worthless! He always gets in our way just when things are going to get good!" She sighed dreamily onto his chest. Though that wasn't nearly fake, it had been a good chance to cop a feel, take _that_ Ino-buta! "It should take him some time, the idiot, I'm sure we can spend our time very enjoyably until then..." She tried to seduce him (again not that faked), but she felt his muscles tense and sighed inside. Always interrupted at the good part, shannaro!

Less than a second later, a bunch of kunai had been sent at them... Or where they used to be anyway, as the pair quickly split up, each going to opposing directions.

It was a bad match-up really; the attacking genning were from Ame, a place of dreary rain and flat lands. This was Konoha, a place of bright greens and tall trees. The attacking duo had no idea how to camouflage themselves effectively to hide from shinobi who have trained to fight in those conditions. A few minutes later, an unconscious and two tied up gennin, all of the same team, had been tossed into the clearing, Team Seven glaring at them.

"Did you _really_ think you could have hidden from us? I knew of your little circle genjutsu after the second time I passed the same tree, Sakura probably felt your chakra and Naruto... Well, Naruto can run the entire day without getting tired. Now, where is your scroll, and be quick about it. There's a giant spider colony here, you wouldn't want to be left behind now, would you?" Sasuke smirked at them.

"Y-you wouldn't dare!" Their apparent leader said, not sounding too sure of that. "Y-you Konoha ninja don't have the guts to do it!"

"Ah, don't bother with'em Sasuke," Spoke Naruto, stopping the 'leader'. "I already got it. Let's go!"

And as the team leapt off, they heard the desperate cry of help behind them. Only Naruto sighed and tossed a kunai back at them. "What? I couldn't leave them to die! We're way ahead of them too; the kunai landed about a dozen or so meters above them. It'll take them a while to get it and by then we'll be gone. Now, left or right? Left's some leeches but right's longer and will put us over some giant wolves."

"And ahead?"

"Ahead, my dear Sakura-chan, is a field of mushrooms that release toxic fumes. Beyond that, there's several giant wasp nests. And after that is a small field with man-eating plants. No, we do _not_ go ahead."

Sakura gulped and nodded. In the end, they went right, but not before sending some Naruto-clones to make tracks towards the left.

Both scrolls were now safe in the team's pockets, Naruto had placed their second one in his pouch while promising Sakura their third if they got it, as they leapt.

Then, Fate decided to toy with them.

A strong gust of wind, too strong to be naturally developing, blasted the team. While Sakura and Sasuke had been lucky enough to be on a tree branch, Naruto was not so; he was caught mid-jump and was sent tumbling back.

After breaking several branches, Naruto finally managed to find the earth beneath his feet, or well, around his body as he rolled several times to absorb as much of the impact as he could.

"Well, ain't that _grand_." He drawled in a way too similar to Sasuke. His eyes closed a bit and he focused on the chakra-charged leaves he had given his team. Ah, good, not too far away, nothing near them either. Now, let's see how to get there... And could someone stop that damn hissing!

Wait, hissing?

"Oh shit!" Turning around to see a giant snake reel back to snap at him, Naruto's mind turned to Kakashi's training.

Namely that time that his sensei told him that a wind moving in spirals generated more power than going straight. That had given birth to Naruto's sole movement technique. "YIKES!" And he was off! Pumping chakra to his calves and feet, turning into a powerful gust of wind and spinning it counter-clockwise (he had found it made the spin stronger somehow), Naruto was tossed high into the air, spinning vertically as he went, the wind making a small cyclone under him.

Of course, it didn't give him flight, but he _had _leapt just over the damn snake's jaws and onto a tree branch.

"Damn, giant snakes too? I _hate snakes_!" He whined before leaking his chakra onto the branch he was standing on and right into the leaves around him. Then, ram, ox, bird, dragon and the leaves came alive, gathering around his clenched right fist. "Back the fuck of, slime-head! **Konoha Ninpo: Ha no Nagare (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Stream)**!" And he punched, sending the torrent of wind-enhanced, hardened leaves washing down on the serpent, spinning in a spiral, as if in a funnel.

"HISSSS!" The snake reeled back, its face cut up in many places, eyes bleeding and blind, even its long, forked tongue had been cut apart. Deciding that staying any longer would be greatly detrimental to its health, and resolving to warn the others about the jungle-friend monkey, it decided that discretion is the better part of survival. It quickly vanished in a puff of smoke.

"Smoke? Wait, that's summons! Oh UNHOLY FUCKING HELL!" Naruto yelled, knowing that only one person had the legenedary snake summoning ability. A ninja considered as a genius and a prodigy in one. A ninja insane, deranged and yet brilliant.

Someone he would have _loved_ to meet, were he not an evil, depraved bastard.

One of the legendary Sannin, Konoha's strongest three-person team...

Orochimaru.

And where Orochimaru was... Well, Naruto wasn't exactly sure what Orochimaru did (he had never talked to the man), but he did _not_ want to know. Because if Orochimaru was there... then things were _not_ going to be nice.

So, channeling chakra to his feet like Sasuke had shown him, Naruto leapt forward, features contorted by his worry for his friend. The exams were unimportant right now; he had first to make sure Sasuke survived!

_'Hurry! Hurry! Hurry goddamn you, stupid legs!'_ He urged himself, the place going by in a blur. A spider made to jump at him and was summarily kicked off into a tree without though. It was pulverized on contact.

Leaves swirled around Naruto as he let his chakra flow freely, connecting with every single leaf around him, filling it with his chakra so he could make room for more.

At last, the branches opened up to reveal Sasuke doubling in pain as someone had planted his fist into his kidneys. When that someone pulled back for another blow, Naruto had had _enough_.

He leapt in front of his friends, hands splayed to the sides, leaves quickly gathering in front of him, sticking with each other and hardening.

The thud of the fist was not the only sign of the blow; Naruto felt his arms strain as he held the shield back.

"Oh, now that's an interesting jutsu. I wonder, how did you get past my snake?" Asked an effeminate voice that had Naruto's hair standing at the cold threat in it.

"Konoha ninpo: Konoha no Tate... You're Orochimaru, aren't you?" He shook in his sandals, for sure, but he knew he had to buy some time for Sasuke to recover. Kidney blows _suck_.

"Me, Orochimaru? Now, where did you get that idea from, boy?" He seemed genuinely curious, even arrogantly ready to launch into a self-important speech. Well, he _was_ a villain.

"You used a summoned snake. Granted, it slowed me for a second or two, but yeah, it was a summon. The only ninja who summons snakes is Orochimaru, and I doubt a gennin, or hell, even a jounin, would manage to get one of Orochimaru's most prized techniques and live. Either you're Orochimaru, or you're on his level of skill, or you're one of his subordinates. I'd rather think you're Orochimaru, you feel too... _off_..."

The man laughed, and gods, it was an evil laugh, it was a _wrong_ laugh, it sounded like it scraped on Naruto's ears. At least, behind the blonde, Sasuke had recovered, though he stayed doubled over to hide that fact.

"Yes, yes, I am Orochimaru. Are you frightened little boy? Well, you definitely _should_ be. Especially if you keep standing in my way. I just want Sasuke-kun behind you."

"I'd call you a gay pedophile, but I doubt you'd take it as an insult." Naruto snarked before his eyes got serious. "So, instead... I'm just gonna do THIS!" He yelled, snapping his hands forward, breaking his shield to individual leaves and turning the chakra from earth-mimicking to straight wind-type. An instant later, the stream of leaves had been launched at the still smirking man.

Both Sasuke and Naruto, the latter with a dozen clones spawning as well, leapt away, claring the place just in case. Good thing too, as the Orochimaru they had been talking to had turned to mud and another had appeared melding out from the earth.

"Impressive instincts. I did expect them from Sasuke-kun, but to get them from you as well, Naruto-kun? My, my, seems my spies aren't as good as they think they are."

While the two boys fought for their lives, Sakura shivered away from them. She had barely even recovered from just a _look_ Orochimaru had sent them, so strong in _ki_ that it had made them _hallucinate_ and see their deaths over and over again!

She saw Naruto launch one of his Ha no Nagare, many clones at the same time, making a deluge of leaves all around, shaving parts off trees, and yet Orochimaru didn't even seem fazed, or even hit!

She saw Sasuke-kun bind Orochimaru in wires and then set him on fire with an awesome fire jutsu called the Fire Dragon, and all Orochimaru did was take off his melted face and smirk, unhurt!

Nothing they did could hurt him! Nothing they did even annoyed him!

Punch, kick, flurry of knife slashes, kick, kick, leap and drown the place in fire, popping of Naruto's clones, grunts of pain and exertion and above it all, above all this chaos...

Orochimaru's laughter. Orochimaru's taunting. Orochimaru's smirk. _Orochimaru._

Sakura quickly ran to Naruto when he was kicked down and fell right next to her. Her stomach clenched, one eye was closed, his left arm was clutched to his stomach, as if to hold it there, and he was beaten black and blue.

In front of them, not even half a dozen meters yet so _far away_, Sasuke was screaming in pure agony, Orochimaru having somehow bitten him.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Naruto got up, _yet again_, and charged Orochimaru, only managing to pull Sasuke away from that _monster_ while it _laughed_.

But he didn't get away himself, he was grabbed from his hurting arm, eliciting a grunt of pain, which was scaring Sakura since she had never seen Naruto so much as flinch in pain. Then, with another mocking comment about incompetence and 'being useless to him', Orochimaru slammed his palm on Naruto.

This time, Naruto didn't grunt or whimped.

He screamed!

Then he fell, Orochimaru kicking him over to his team. "Well, I guess that's the limit of your power. Might as well kill you, rid Sasuke-kun of the company of such weaklings." He sneered, revealing for once what must surely lay beneath that smirking facade, a monstrous mien that made Sakura shiver.

But Naruto wasn't out just yet. Barely aware of himself, barely even cognizant he would admit, but he hadn't given up! His chakra was all wonky, but it was still there, _still fucking there_!

It took a momentum feat of will, but Naruto got up _again_, wobbly and unsteady, but still standing.

"Naruto..." Sakura's breathless whisper just reached his eyes and elicited one of his foxy, smartass, confident grins. As if to say 'everything's gonna be fine, Sakura-chan, just trust me'.

Just like always.

Then the pinkette noticed something in his hand, a weird fruit, looking like a large, bright, violet grape. Then he was eating it with swift bites.

That's when the chakra came. Bursting around like Naruto, potency and quantity making up for quality, a visible _tower_ of chakra, a flame that covered half the clearing, all of it centered around the blonde gennin.

A blonde gennin with three clones appearing behind him, grabbing the team quickly and securing them, all except Naruto. Their summoner had instead fallen to a handseal terribly familiar to Sakura, the handseal of his first ever jutsu.

Orochimaru, confident in his skill, merely looked on amused. Soon the seal would set, anyway, and the blonde would be out like a light. Might as well see what stupidity the boy thinks it can use to hurt him. If its enough, he might even convert the brat in some other way.

"**Konoha Ninpo... Konohagakure no jutsu...**" Naruto spoke between coughs, but he made it.

Leaves were ripped from the trees around him, a cloud of green, complementing those he had used before, saturating the world around him with his brilliant blue chakra.

Then something happened that Sakura hadn't seen. The right hand fell from where it was place, just above the crown of the head, never loosing its half-ram placement, and came to rest upside-down, palms touching, right onto his left.

The world erupted into violent green, ripping white and blades that cut the world!

A high-pitched sound, like a thousand shuriken, spinning through the air filled Sakura's ears, for but a second before her world became a blur.

Orochimaru wasn't so lucky.

He had barely heard the gennin's words, before the world became chaos.

"**Haton: Senhaken (Leaf Style: Thousand Leaf Blades).**"

It was as if thousands of blades, screeching piercingly, howling fearsomely, descended to this place of the world. A green maelstrom of blades that turned trees to sawdust and stones to dust.

It only lasted a few seconds, but it was enough.

When Orochimaru re-emerged from his hiding place, he looked around in unbridled awe.

It was gone. The entire clearing, trees wider than two men are tall, rocks the size of small houses, they were all _gone_. They had been cut to pieces so small, to dust and grain.

The blonde had rendered the entire place a _deadland_. In a sphere, a wide ovoid to be exact, like an egg... it had all... been _sliced apart_.

Looking down at the sudden pain on his left arm, his eyes widened. _'That boy... managed to actually... hurt me?'_

In another part of the Forest, far away from their almost-killer, a pink-haired girl was dragging her two unconscious team mates under a hollowed tree, praying beyond hope that they would be alright.

**A/N: New Leaf Style Maestrom chapters, now with 25% more crack!**

**Well, this one took a bit of time to write, and I got few reviews for the previous one, could that be connected?**

**As always, I pose the question; Does anyone want to adopt this story?**

**But if not, well, keep up reviewing, if you could. And when allows you, since it seems that there are quite a few problems with logging in lately, aren't they? I wonder why, it's so annoying!**

**Also I'm looking for a new outfit for Naruto... something with loose sleeves and pants for the third part of the exams and after... Any ideas/pics? Would really appreciate them. Am thinking of green-camo as base color, with pants and a long-sleeved vest, with a beige or brown-camo (forest camo with more browns) shirt underneath, hiding the light armor he wears. Finishing touches with a wide ninja pouch that covers the entire small of the back (where Sakura had her tanto), small bands on his arms just under the shoulder joint and an indian-inspired background for the cloth of his headband... Then again, I was never known for my fashion sense, in fact, I've admitted that I'll probably show up in my own wedding in old blue-jeans, plain black T-shirt and black or brown full-time boots... **

**Here's the Jutsu list for this chapter:**

**Konoha Ninpo: Ha-ken (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Sword)**

**Cost: C, Control: B, Rank: A**

**One of Naruto's most versatile leaf-based jutsu, the Ha-ken is an excellent display of how with a little bit of power, you can go a long way. It appears as a sword composed of leaves, complete with a wide handguard or basket hilt to protect the hand, it tends to have a straight blade made out of several layers of leaves. The leaves themselves are enhanced with chakra, making them hard and resistant to damage, while the wind-chakra that flows through the jutsu gives it a good edge. However, its best feature lies in its unstable form; the user can easily extend it and turn it into a whip, surprising enemies with the sudden increase in range, or dulling the edge to use it to grab from a protrusion, like a real whip, and swing somewhere else. Additionally, because the weapon is held by chakra, its form changes to suit the user's needs subconsciously; the weight and form change constantly to make up for any possible inexperience the user has. Because of this, even if the jutsu itself deals relatively little damage, it is still considered A-ranked out of the sheer number of uses it has.**

**Konoha Ninpo: Ha no Nagare (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Stream)**

**Cost: C, Control: C, Rank: C**

**The Leaf Stream jutsu is very straightforward, but highly effective none the less. The user gathers leaves in front of their hand, or other major chakra point, and spin them into a spiral before sending it forward. Depending on the amount of leaves, chakra used and charge time, it can easily rival a B-rank jutsu, as the leaves easily carry wind-chakra edges. Individual cuts, despite their large numbers, are relatively small however, so several Doton defencive jutsu can outright cancel it.**

**Konoha Ninpo: Konoha no Tate (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Shield)**

**Cost: B, Control: B, Rank: B**

**A defencive jutsu utilizing chakra-hardened leaves protected by a wind current that deflects fire and lightning attacks, placed in several layers of dense web-like formations. It is mobile and can move according to the user's motions and can easily deflect most weapons with ease; even if one leaf is cut, another ten will take up its place, thickening and thinning as the user needs. However, the shield itself may be able to stop an attack, but the user still suffers damage if their physical strength isn't enough to hold it back. Thus, it is ill-advised to use this jutsu to defend against a large attack, such as a boss-sized summon.**

**Haton: Senhaken (Leaf Style: Thousand Leaf Blades)**

**Cost: B, Control: B, Rank: A**

**One of the 'big guns' in the leaf-style arsenal, the Senhaken makes right to the A-rank jutsu family. The user spins leaves around him, much like the Konohagakure, but does not allow them to come within a certain, small range of him. The reason is simple; as soon as the last handsign is made, each leaf is surrounded by a large wind blade, extending out to several inches. This usually means that whatever is near the user is sliced and diced in an instant. Depending on the amount of chakra used, this jutsu can change an entire battlefield in an instant. Due to the high chakra cost requirements, it is rarely sustained for more than a few seconds; few things last as long anyway and no enemy would enter the threatened area after it is used. A downside is that, thanks to the focus required to use it, the user, and therefore the technique itself, cannot move from their spot.**

**If you have any ideas for more jutsu, feel free to send them over; I'll cite you in.**

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouse Scene Three:**

Naruto holds more than the Warehouse to his name however.

A mere twenty feet away is the Glasshouse, a smaller and shorter creation of plastic and glass, letting as much light as possible go in, perfect for plants in need of more sunlight and warmth.

At first, merely the fact that it belonged to the Demon Brat had a few drunken civilians (and occasional ninja) throw stones at it, hoping it were destroyed. However, the blonde not only didn't seem to mind, but his irritating smile sapped their will to destroy the greenhouse; they were simply too disheartened after the first three years.

But were an architect to pay attention, they would notice that the glass panes and thick iron-and-plastic supports were made to protect the integrity not only from outside forces but also from ground-level internal ones.

And were someone to really pay attention to the plantlife inside, they would have noticed that, even with no wind, many of these plants still moved.

Against their will, and better judgement and many complaints, Team Seven found themselves close to that Warehouse of Naruto, though Kakashi had to threaten Naruto with a sword version of Sennen Goroshi to escape being dragged into the concrete building.

Even so though, Kakashi, and the rest of his team, couldn't restrain a shiver when they entered the veritable _jungle_ that was Naruto's Glasshouse. Even Sakura, the one most interested in flowers and herbs of her team, even she could not help but feel intimidated. It was almost like killing intent, or more like 'I-want-to-eat-you' intent.

Sasuke fared only slightly better; he had several katon jutsu he could utilize to get the bloody hell out of that green hell.

And how green it was! There were no trees and only a few shrubs in the entire building; most of the plantlife was in the forms of vivid green vines and emerald-green leaves, only a few fleshy-red flowers littering the place.

But even the sweet scent of nectar couldn't shake away the feeling of a predator looking at you and licking his chops.

Naruto whistled a happy tune as he dragged a large sack of his special 'fertilizer' for his pretties. He loved them so! And they loved him back! Oh, how happy he was to be amongst them again!

_Giggle. Yesss my pretties, I have good food with me. Giggle-giggle._

Kakashi and Sasuke were smart enough to stick together, 'coincidentally' looking over each other's shoulders, but Sakura... she wasn't that wise. She was curious; she knew Naruto cultivated Purple Irises and she wanted to see them! Now.

Patience had never been a large part of the pinkette.

So, instead of doing the logical and sensible thing in an area full of predators... She wandered off and away from her team.

But no one paid attention to her, mostly because **A) **Naruto was too busy hugging his 'pretties' and **B) **because Kakashi and Sasuke were shocked to find him being _hugged back!_

"N-Naruto! G-Get away from that plant! It's dangerous!" Cried out an alarmed Kakashi, watching his student get wrapped around by vines.

The gennin instead laughed merrily. "Oh what are you saying, Kakashi-sensei! They just like hugs!" More and more vines were wrapped around him, shaking him left and right but not once did he look worried.

"SASUKE-KUN! HEEELP!" Came Sakura's screech of panic and everyone turned to see the pink-haired girl high in the air, rope-like vines wrapped around her body, holding her limbs apart. Many more waved in the air around the panicking girl, her clothes already sticking to the skin thanks to the nectar the flower-like openings at the end of the vines produced.

"Oh, Sakura-chan! My pretties seem to really like you!" Replied Naruto, who's vines were far less wild than his team mate's.

"W-What are you talking about Naru-OH! IT'S IN!" She squealed, and was there a blush on her face?

It was right about then that Sasuke's nose exploded in a nosebleed and Kakashi decided to free his female student- before his brain had time to melt down at the sight. He would forever mourn the fact that Naruto didn't escape with them.

Who knew what those monstrocities would do to his poor, poor student? Oh, the shame, that Minato-sensei's son would end up like that...

Inside the Glasshouse, Naruto was rolling on the floor laughing while mercilessly tickled by the vines. His friends were pranksters like him, only with a far more perverted side. The look on Kakashi's face!

Some day, he'd have to tell the man about his dryads, but first he'd have to teach the girls how to tell 'eatable flesh' from 'non-eatable flesh'. Until then, he would be content to be hugged by the rather frisky human-looking plants.

Who said having a green thumb was a bad thing?

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><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	9. Chapter 9 Intermission

_Intermission - Dream_

It is all so peaceful.

It is all so calm.

There is a blue sky and green earth.

No, not earth, grass.

It is all so blurry, nothing sticks out from each other.

Grass, green and calm and _so comforting_ is all around.

Something springs from the ground.

It has a brown, thin body, swaying lightlyas if a breeze can break it. On its only limb, there is a green oval... A leaf.

A green leaf.

Ah, look how it sways, as if it can be torn at the smallest gust?

Ah, look how pretty it is, as if it holds the truth of life in it?

There is no greater wonder than it!

But the small brown sapling grows.

Ah, look, it grows more limbs!

Ah, look, it grows more leaves!

Ah, look, the Life shines!

A grey wind, jealous and fast, comes!

Ah, look how it sways! Look how it creaks, left and right and left again!

Ah, look how a limb breaks!

Ah, look, a few leaves have left the tree!

Oh, it is so sad now, is it not? With only a few leaves on it, it must be so lonely, must it not?

Ah, look to the side! Where the leaves land!

Ah, look, the grass swallows up the leaf!

Ah, look! A miracle! A sapling! From the green grass, it sprouts up!

Ah, look! The first sapling, it is not broken! Look, look! It grows! Look, look! It has grown new leaves, more and more, strong and big!

Ah, look! It casts a shadow now!

Behold! Rejoice! Celebrate!

Each leaf now grows into its own sapling! Each now holds its own limbs, its own leaves!

Look, at them! See them! They grow, big and strong and many-limbed and more-leafed!

The sapling is no sapling no more, it is now a tree, it leads the others!

The tree is not along no longer, it is now part of a great forest!

The grey wind comes again.

But the forest only laughs.

Their peace is stronger. Their life is greater.

They laugh, a voice through their strong branches as they shake the wind off!

_Be at Peace, brother. We shade you. We shield you. Now grow with us!  
><em>

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><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	10. Chapter 10

_Chapter 10: Mokutan (Charcoal)_

It felt like he was moving through water, or maybe syrup. Much better if it could have been ramen broth, he would'ave drunk it all up then, and he would have been free.

But it wasn't ramen broth nor syrup nor water.

It was himself, he realized as he opened his eyes. _Whoa, bright._ Or not, it just seemed to be to his own eyes, how long had he been sleeping? It felt like molasses around him, and he would know molasses, he's used them before.

"Ugh..." His throat was dry, parched, and he felt like even walking was a chore.

What had happened? He remembered Orochimaru, he remembered fighting the snake user and... and...

_~Flashback~_

_"Can't have you getting uppity on me now, can we, boy? Pity you're useless to me, but I'll take care of you right now. __**Gogyo Fuuin (Five Elements Seal)**__!"_

_A hand on his stomach, where he knew something important was placed. No, he couldn't!_

_Then... __**PAIN**__._

_~End Flashback~_

No wonder he had been fucked up seven ways to sunday... He might not know much about seals, but he knew that unless they were made in very specific ways, interacting seals tend to mess the whole thing up.

"Aargh! No, please, stop!" A voice came from the outside and Naruto sighed. Never a moment's rest, what is he, some superhero guy? It _would_ be cool if they gave some suits too, but nooo, wearing spandex is considered 'tacky' and 'disgusting'.

Making his peace with his apparent fate of not being allowed a day to sleep in (the sun is an evil bastard like that and his bedroom's window faces east), he got up and shambled outwards.

Well, he wasn't expecting this, exactly. No, nothing like it at all. Sakura cowering to the side, her hair looked very good cut short, Rock Lee had been almost unconscious, Chouji and Shikamaru were panting, Ino was unconscious, weird though, she had no wound... But, there were three foreign guys, a scared witless girl, a hunchback bandage-covered guy looking with a horrified single eye and another guy screaming in pain as Sasuke seemed to be pulling his arms back, as if to break them.

Obviously, Naruto did the logical thing; he went behind Sasuke and punched him on the head.

"Ow!"

"Oh, shut up mister Uchiha 'I'm-gods'-gift-to-existence' Sasuke. Seriously, what's wrong with you dude, breaking arms? I mean, really, breaking arms? Either break the neck or knock the weakling out."

"They hurt Sakura."

"Ah. Well, that changes things. So, you get the arms, I get the legs? Or are you thinking about something more... finessed? Like, skinning or poisons! Give me an hour and some water, I'll make you some neurotoxins. Oh, and don't forget we need to water the pretties!" He suddenly cried out. Really, having everyone freak out with just a few words was too much fun, would they ever realize he was just messing around with them? Well, his pretties were pretty darn important to him, more than the Hat in fact, but he _did_ know when to speak about them or not. Heh, messing around with that Kabuto guy sure was fun. Ibiki and Anko too!

The poor boy made to sputter, but at least the black tattoos that had crawled up his face seemed to start burning like flames, weird they _looked_ like flames too, and receded quickly.

The three sound ninja made to quietly leave while everyone was looking at Naruto, but were quickly stopped. "Oh no, no, that won't do! Why are you leaving, not even giving us a little present for letting you keep your arms?" Naruto asked them rather pleasantly, were it not for the red-glowing mushrooms in his head that seemed to be emiting a cloud shaped like a skull over them. "Do we _really_ have to do this?" The skull seemed to grin evilly.

The hunchback, later Naruto would learn he was called Kinuta Dosu, quickly realized that just as the blonde had pulled the crazed Uchiha back, it would have been just as easy to set him loose again, so he did the smart thing; he dropped his team's scroll and quickly left. Not like he couldn't get another anyway.

"Well, that settles that! Anyone up for some tea?" The pleasant grin was back, only this time the mushrooms were normal instead of glowing.

"N-Naruto... Are... are you alright?" Sakura asked, worried. Sure he _seemed_ fine, but she knew her team-mate quite well. She could tell he wasn't fine. "Y-You and Sasuke-kun were burning up, not ten minutes ago and... and... and you were so... you were in a _coma_ Naruto, Sasuke-kun! You can't go exerting yourselves! You should sit down and gather your strength!" She insisted taking up her role as the team's medic.

"And how long has it been since _you_ slept?" Naruto asked with sudden clarity and seriousness, not stopping his preparations for a hand-made mushroom soup. Even Sasuke had taken a seat, leaning back against a tree, looking at his hands, or just brooding. "You have circles under your eyes and you have not combed your hair, nice haircut by the way, but it needs a bit of trimming around the edges. But, you haven't slept for at least a day, have you, Sakura-chan?"

The pinkette sighed. How could he always be so... so _insistenti_ on taking the attention off him? For an orange-obsessed, loudmouthed idiot, he could sure evade questions when he wanted to. "It's... It's been three days actually... You... You and Sasuke-kun have been in a dreadful state ever... ever since that _guy_..."

"Orochimaru." Naruto corrected her somberly. "Not guy, I doubt he even qualifies as human any more, didn't you _feel _it? His ki was... His _chakra_ was... It was unreal... If I were to put it to colors, our chakra's blue, his was a sick _purple_... Not like Ino-chan likes either, no offence, eh?" He sent a smile at the girl, who was too stunned looking at the class dobe act like... like a normal human being, a serious one at that too. "Now come, let's have a bit of brunch, lunch, whatever, I don't even know what time it is. You too, teme, get off your ass."

While Chouji tried to convince his team that yes, they should have some food and Lee gushed over the plate offered to him by Sakura, only Naruto paid enough attention to the boy in question.

He had not moved at all. While not strange for the boy to keep immobile for long amounts of time, he had just sort of _collapsed_ there and was deep in concentration. So, Naruto sat down next to him, a steaming hot bowl of mushroom soup in each hand.

"Eat while it's hot or tell me what's wrong. Just don't brood like you're five again, man, you're stronger than that."

"Strong... I'm not strong... I was pathetic... He... He destroyed me... Us..." Was the reply before a short sip of the sour-tasting concoction. It sure tasted... different. But it was hot and he could feel the slightly viscous broth slowly trickle down his esophagus, reaching his stomach and spread from there.

"Yeah, not like he has fifty fucking years of experience over us, not like he was considered a genius _and_ a prodigy since when he was a brat, not that he's on the top three most wanted men list. You only care that he owned our asses. Sorry to break it to ya, mate, but he could have taken on Zabuza and Kakashi at the same time and not break a sweat probably. We managed to _survive_, we managed to _get the fuck away _from him _and_ we survived longer than most chuunin would."

"No... we lost... He was... He was toying with us... All this training! All this hard work! All this supposed _talent_ and _skill_ and... And it was pointless!" Sasuke ranted. "He... he was so _strong_... He was so strong I stood in _awe_, I found it... I found it beautiful!"

"What are you, a masochist? Beyond I already thought you were anyway." And cue an interruption by a smirking Naruto. "Yeah, he was cool, and creepy as hell though, don't forget that. But, we're still gennin, we're _twelve_, he's over _sixty_, it was a given that we'd get our asses handed to us. At least we lived to see another day."

"No... We ran, like _dogs_," He spat out with disgust. "He had so much _power_ and... and all we could do was hope to survive! Like rats! All we've done is only fit for rats!" The bowl was tossed away, spilling on the ground while Sasuke got up and left the clearing, leaving a sad Naruto behind.

For his part, Naruto could understand, he supposed. Sasuke had been obsessed with power for so long, giving his all for a personnal vendetta, a goal he had taken up as his drive in life, the only reason he was alive.

Pretty much like Naruto himself; only where Sasuke wanted to bring his brother to justice, Naruto wanted to be acknowledged by everyone.

If there had been anything that would show Naruto he would never have a chance at his dream, then yeah, he would have reacted badly to it too. Or if he had found he actually came from a clan and nobody told him about it. Yeah, that'd piss him off pretty badly too.

So he let his friend, his almost-brother, go. He'd need some time to sort his feelings, maybe he could get him a plant to keep him company as well? That'd work, right?

No sense in letting perfectly good soup go to waste though, so he took out his sealing scroll, a very nice gift from Kakashi-sensei, and sat down next to a still-eating Sakura.

The girl was eating almost as ravenously as Chouji!

Making small talk, he learned more than a few things. Lee was going solo into the woods, seeing if he could take out a team or at least give directions to his partners. Ino and her own team had been looking to set a trap at some team when they found out about Team Seven being damaged and had, at Ino's insistence, come to help. Lastly, Sakura had spent three days in vigil, looking over both Naruto and Sasuke and taking care of them as best as she could, though nothing she had used had been effective. It seems she had been so devoted to them she had barely had something to eat, having feeling someone watching over her hiding place for three days, she hadn't dared leave to forage.

Eventually Sasuke came back, forcing a smile and 'I'm fine, drop it' line, sitting next to them and taking some soup, but only after his stomach _roared_. It had given them all a few laughs (or giggles in the case of the girls), though he seemed even more brooding, or sulken, than usual. Naruto though just assumed he would get over it in time. He trusted Sasuke; he wasn't weak.

Ino then asked a question that had been bugging her for a long time (ever since she saw him at the first part, really). "Naruto... are... are you just acting like you're crazy?"

"My dear Ino-chan," He said, grinning at her and his eyes glinting with something the girl couldn't recognize. "we're _all_ crazy. Some of us just enjoy the ride!"

That earned a laugh from Shikamaru, who was smart enough to get the point, and surprising Sasuke, who was _crazy_ enough to do the same thing.

Funny that, if you think about it; crazy and smart can mean the same thing sometimes, eh?

But, in the end, it was time to move on and, while Ino and Sakura both advocated that their teams stick together, Shikamaru didn't consider it tactically wise and Sasuke wasn't in the mood for it. Chouji and Naruto's opinion apparently didn't matter, but it wasn't like they minded any.

What really worried Naruto, besides Sasuke's constant state of anger and sulking, was that they had to move quickly. The Tower wasn't exactly far, but his clones hadn't been exactly accurate in their Mori Yuurei transportation. If anything, they had sent them off to a completely different quadrant. They'd have to be more careful about roving teams right now, not to mention the snake bastard himself. At best it would take them a whole day to get to the tower and it was already the fourth day, he couldn't even use the Mori Yuurei a second time, he was lucky to be standing if what he felt about his chakra system was right. He could feel his reserver return, but slower than they ever had and it was still weird. What had snake-eyes done to him anyway? Maybe he should ask Old Man Sarutobi.

Soon, Team Seven was leaping again in triangle formation, Sasuke in the lead. He had insisted they do that, even though Naruto had to constantly leap next to him to notify him of a detour. Their leader had almost attacked once or twice anyway, a show of agression they had rarely seen from him, but the blonde managed to convince him to save it for the third part and any campers outside the tower; they weren't out of it yet.

At last, with thankfully little trouble except for a stubborn bear, the group made it to the Tower. Just like Naruto remembered it, a spire jutting out from the ground, worn stone and scratched doors. Over them a sign; _"If you have Heaven, then scour the world for the Earth. If you have Earth, gaze up to the sky to see the Heaven. The Balance Is The Key."_ It was rather cryptic in its meaning, but it got along another point finely enough. They had two scrolls, right? A Heaven and Earth. Obviously the sign told them they needed both, but for _what_?

"Let's open them. The proctor said not to open them unless we got here. Guess... guess we need them both and be here before we can use them." Suggested Sasuke, already taking out the scroll he had taken from the Oto ninja, thankfully it was a pair to the one Naruto held. Still, it was a reminder that he had actually failed as a team leader, he had quickly surrendered their first scroll to that Orochimaru guy...

He was a failure, a failure that desired, no _needed_, strength. And he had _found it_, for just a few moments after awakening from his coma, up until Naruto stopped him, he had found _power_. A little jealous voice in his head asked him, maybe Naruto stopped him so he wouldn't get too powerful.

He shook his head. Naruto would never do something like that, it wasn't his thing. Naruto may be a crazy, bat-shit loco, obstinate idiot, but he was also a friend and a dependable one at that. He would never, _never_, do something like that... right?

"Dunno, Sasuke... But I guess, we don't have much choice, do we? Alright, let's do it." The blonde replied, retrieving his own and, with a look at Sasuke, opened it at the same time.

Smoke began to erupt from the scrolls and they seemed to draw themselves onto each other so Naruto and Sasuke, knowing that seals should really be left to do what they do unless you know how to mess with them, tossed them and leapt back to Sakura. The girl had already taken out a few kunai and was readying herself to replace with a log behind the scrolls. After all, judging by the shape and movement of the smoke and the patterns of the scribblings...

"It's summoning something..." Sasuke whispered, complementing Sakura's thoughts. He peered hard into it and tried to activate his Sharingan, but he stopped immidiately, feeling a searing pain over his left shoulder and what little chakra he had amounted vanish quickly. _'I can't use my Sharingan? What am I... How could someone... How __**dare they take my rightful power from me**__!'_ He raged internally, hopping from wondering to terrified to aggressive and back again, all in the space of a second.

Namely the second it took for the smoke to clear and the figure inside it become identifiable, one Umino Iruka.

Said chuunin teacher was quickly glomped to the ground by a happy Naruto, laughing all the way and rubbing the blonde's head. "Haha, I'm glad to see you too, Naruto. It's been quite a bit of time, hasn't it? How have you three been doing? Nothing too bad I hope, or should I have you writing lines again?" He joked, earning a giggle from Sakura, a somewhat forced smirk from Sasuke and a scared look from Naruto. Ah, good days, good days.

"No! Naruto is a good boy!" Naruto squeaked and leaped off the man, looking innocent. Everyone laughed at that, even a recovering Sasuke, though his lasted the shortest.

"Good to know you'll be behaving, brat." Iruka used the usual insult as a term of affection. "Now come, I bet you're all exhausted. Get inside, I'll get you something to eat and drink, it's not over yet."

The chuunin's words were prophetic, or at least well-informed. After a small brunch of sandwitches, several for each member in fact, and some water, every ninja in the tower was called down for debriefing. It was there they found why it wasn't over yet; there were just too many of them, even if most were Konoha gennin. Kabuto's team had finished along Lee's and the other three Konoha rookie teams. The Oto ninja had also managed to recover, despite their near-death experience, and were looking hatefully at Team Seven from their place next to the Sabaku siblings of Suna. All in all, seven teams of three, 21 applicants.

The Hokage, ignoring Naruto's squeals of 'Hiii jii-chan!', then informed them that they would be having a small tournament to narrow down the numbers of the third part of the exam. It was then that a sickly jounin, named Gekko Hayate, took over and told them that their matches would be random and asked everyone to go up the stairs to an overlooking veranda of sorts.

Sasuke's match was the first, something that relieved a worried Kakashi. He had seen the mark on the boy's neck and he had hoped it would be so, he'd get him out of there as soon as he ended the fight. He was glad that his opponent was another Konoha gennin, one Akado Yoroi, surely the other gennin wouldn't go too rough on him.

That sentiment was thrown right out the window once the fight started. If anything, Yoroi fought to mock, injure and slowly kill the Uchiha, drawing his chakra out bit by bit every time they touched. Sasuke was on his right knee, and he was getting ready to interfere when Naruto, bless his soul, interferred.

"Get up teme! Are you letting that weakling take you down? You've stood against Zabuza and you let that looser get you on bended knees? Get up, Sasuke, me and Sakura believe in you!"

That had been the little surge of power the boy had needed to get back up and stare down a now cowering Yoroi. Sasuke didn't dare pull out more chakra than he needed to survive, it hurt like a bitch when he tried it to use his favourite fireball jutsu. So, instead, he decided to take a leaf out of Naruto's book and charged his enemy. _First step: Unbalance them._ Yoroi knew he was dangerous at short range, he had assumed that Sasuke would stay the heck away from him. He assumed wrong. _Second step: Skill and knowledge are important, use what you have._ What did he have? He was a taijutsu genius. He had seen Lee's movements and, thanks to his Sharingan memorized them. More importantly, he could replicate them as his body was in fact highly conditioned. Yoroi's chin met Sasuke's high kick and he was bodily thrown off the floor, an instant later followed by Sasuke. _Third step: Improvise._ He hadn't seen Lee's follow-up deadly combo. It didn't matter, he was in an ideal place to attack, so he began his new one.

"Shishi Rendan (Lion Combo)!" And poor Yoroi had his face smashed into the earth by a powerful heel drop from Sasuke after a barrage of other blows.

"Winner by knockout, Uchiha Sasuke."

No sooner had these words been said than Naruto and Sakura whooped in joy, while Kakashi sighed in relief. He was just about to take the boy away when he refused. It wouldn't matter much but...

"Aww, let him stay Kakashi-sensei! He will be good, only watching after all, right? Besides, if we're gonna have a big tournament up next, he's going to need all his knowledge, right?" Naruto begged, getting nods from Sakura. He would have still taken the boy away, especially since Anko was glaring, but Sasuke confirmed that he was alright, and he visibly stood better after his victory. Hm... Interesting. A look at Sandaime-sama also confirmed it, Sasuke would watch the rest of the fights.

Some fights went by, others interesting, others _boring_, but not one of them more gruesome than Gaara's with Lee. The Sand gennin, after getiting handily beaten to the ground by Lee for a while, managed to ensnare the green-colored blur of fists and kicks, before crushing his right arm and leg.

It was then that Naruto realized what was so familiar about this guy. It wasn't those eyes, so much like his own would have been had he not chosen to forgive. It wasn't the feeling of hate and disgust he himself often felt for the people around him. It was the feeling of malice, deep and old and ancient, that circulated through his chakra and looked out behind his eyes...

_**Two great, red, slitted eyes look out from the darkness, a huge set of hungry, salivating teeth, hungrily grinning down, darkness, darkness all around, depressing consuming, devouring-**_

"Naruto, oi, Naruto! Are you even listening!" Sakura yelled at his ear, making him jump. From the look on her face, she had been doing so for quite a bit of time.

"S-Sorry, Sakura-chan. I was... I was thinking."

"Whatever you were thinking must have been terrible... You were trembling and sweating a lot... Anyway, it's my turn to fight now, Ino-buta and I, how poetic." Sakura wanted Naruto to look at her fighting. She wanted him to acknowledge that she had gotten stronger, just like he had improved himself. It wasn't romantic in the slightest, but, if she could get Naruto to admit she had gotten stronger, then, in time,she could also prove it to Sasuke-kun, right?

The fight itself wasn't what Sakura had hoped nor expected. Instead of a straight-out combat, it was a trip down memory lane and her getting over her own past. But, at least she had gotten _that_ chapter of her life closed. It would have been better if she had managed to move on to the next part, but at least she prevented Ino-buta from having that honor. The little voice inside her head, that was coming out more and more often as she spent time near Naruto's insanity, also said that they were the ones least deserving to move on. Compared to _any_ of the gennin there, she and Ino were the weakest.

While she was debating that, another kunoichi, Tenten from Lee's team, was defeated by Sabaku no Temari. This victory, Gaara's victory and Kankuro's earlier one had made the entire Suna delegation advance, much to the chagrin of all Konoha ninja. Quality over quantity they reminded themselves.

And now was Naruto's turn, a fight against an equally loudmouthed gennin, albeit one with a clan; Inuzuka Kiba. The dog-user had always been smug and brash, arrogant as well. Even more so against Naruto, whom he saw as a 'runt', a 'bastard-breed', someone with no clan or family to back him, meaning that he didn't deserve one either. It wasn't his fault as much as the teachings of his tight-knit, pack-like family coupled with the entire village's hate towards the blonde. As the Sandaime had said several times in the past, the adults' hate towards the Uzumaki had tainted the views of the young generation.

That's why, while Kiba was walking down the stairs, he was feeling very smug, almost as if he 'deserved' fighting the 'weakest gennin', the 'dead last'. He conveniently missed Sakura's and Sasuke's glare while Kakashi sighed and wished there was a betting pool going on; he would have made a killing out of the beating he knew would follow.

"Sad to say this, Kakashi, but Naruto has lost. Kiba is the top taijutsu expert and with his dog, he is going to destroy your student. Save some face by stopping the fight." Kurenai, also quite arrogant in her student's coming victory, smug about getting to one-up the perverted jounin.

"Hmm... is that so, little Kurenai..." Kakashi eye-smiled at her, feeling more than a bit vindictive at someone underestimating his brat. "If you're so sure, how about... a bet?"

Being reminded that while he was only a couple of years older than her, Kakashi was considered a legend before she even made gennin, angered Kurenai a lot. So, she accepted his offer. It was even better for Kakashi as Asuma, also an upstart in his opinion, wanting to agree with his future hopefully-girlfriend, also bet quite the sum on Naruto. Even Sarutobi, Anko and Ibiki followed, both betting on Naruto against every chuunin, sans Iruka, who bet against the blonde. The final odds; 5 to 1 in Kiba's favour. Naruto winning would give Kakashi five times the betting money. Oh, this was going to be fun.

"Oi, Naruto!" He yelled over the stands, grinning. "I've bet a few thousand ryo on you. Win and we share fifty-fifty with the team!"

The resulting grin made the entire team grin. Even if he was feeling a bit jealous that no one had bet on him, Sasuke was quite looking forward to the resulting beat-down. Kiba had been most arrogant and insuling these past few days. It was time for someone to show the mutt that he was no alpha.

"Match, START!" Gekkou said and leapt up to bet some on the blonde; the Inuzuka was good, but the blonde had eyes that had seen way more. Eyes of a veteran, even if they were swallowed up by a playfull insanity, or was it insane playfullness?

Kiba however hadn't seen those eyes, nor would he have recognized or even cared about them. In his opinion, the blonde was useless, he had only gotten there riding on the coattails of others. Well, all the better for him, as soon as he would knock him out he would proceed. Shouldn't take more than a punch anyway.

It was a _very_ surprised Kiba that found that his punch had hit nothing. He was stunned in fact to find a great amount of pain on his left kidney as he was tossed away.

In the span of a blink of an eye, Naruto had leaned back, balancing on his left leg, and had snapped a strong kick right into Kiba's left.

"Wachaaaa!" Naruto cried out, in a cheesy voice, moving his eyes like crazy and falling into an exaggerated martial-arts stance

Kiba only got up coughing. What had happened? The blonde had hit him? What the hell, had the blonde looser embarassed him? Vengeance for Zul'jin... err, Vengeance for Embarassment!

With a roar, Kiba threw himself into a charge, meanwhile activating his bloodnline-limit technique called 'Shikyaku no Jutsu' or 'On All Fours Technique', elongating his nails to claws and giving him an animalistic, lower stance.

When he got in range, he launched into an assault of clawed strikes and kicks, causing Naruto to somersault over him, slamming down a heel drop, which was evaded. Naruto fell on the ground and used what little chakra control he had to create a 'buffer' between his leg and the ground, much like done in water-walking, allowing his spin to continue. Before Kiba had the chance to fully turn around, he had placed his shin on the side of Kiba's head and slammed him down with a sudden exertion of force.

"OOOH! What YOUTH!" Gai cried out, tears in his eyes at the kick. The taijutsu master inside him told him that it dealt more than a bit of damage, as the way it was made placed all the stress into Kiba's neck and, since the shin acted as a lever, it could very well break the spine. "What Youthful Fire!" He kept on yelling.

"Chowaaa!" Naruto grinned. "How do you like my Hook Kick, Kibble-breath?" He taunted as he balanced himself on one foot.

It was time, Kiba decided, to play dirty. So, with a bark, Akamaru attacked from behind Naruto, as he had been discarded.

Unfortunately for the puppy, Naruto had been trained in reflexes so he was quick to leap out of the way of the snarling dog.

"Oi, Kibbles, what the hell are you doing, involving your pet in a real fight? I could have killed him, you know! How would you have liked me bringing my pretties into this, huh?"

"Hah, shows how much you know, looser! Akamaru isn't my pet, he's my-"

"Owner, right, Akamaru? If Akamaru isn't your pet, you're _his_, eh?"

"What! You damn looser, I'll show you!" Taking the bait, Kiba ignored his friend and charged Naruto. He only had time to wonder why Naruto grinned before the blonde also charged forward and raised a leg to kick.

With legs being longer than arms, Kiba was fast to change from attack to a desperate defence, if he didn't want to get hammered.

"Hacha-cha-cha-cha-cha-cha-chaaaa!" Naruto rapid-fired several kicks, mixing low with high and finishing with an aerial spin that brought his shin to meet with Kiba's neck once more.

At least, this time, the gennin proved that a dog can in fact learn more than one trick, raising his arm at the last moment to take the brunt of the flyiing kick.

"Oh, pooh," Naruto mocked. "You saw through my aerial Hook Kick." He had one more he could use, pulling his leg back at the last moment to allow for a powerful heel drop on his target's head, but he wasn't going to be able to use it here. The mutt was catching up, and he wanted to save it as a surprise anyway.

But the fight wasn't over just yet. Being repeatedly one-upped by Naruto had pissed Kiba off. That no-name, no-clan bastard had beaten him down, in front of many people, cute girls too! His pride, honed after years of considering himself superior to everyone else (Sasuke lacked a pack, so even if he was stronger, he was still inferior and he could beat everyone else), simply couldn't bear it.

"That's IT! I'm sick of it! You pathetic little looser, it's time to get serious! Akamaru, get over here!" The puppy leapt at its master's side, just in time to catch a small brown sphere with its teeth and then gulp it. The result was instantaneous; he growled louder, deeper, grew in size, spiked his fur and took on a bright red color. "Let's do this, Akamaru!" Said dog leapt on his back and Kiba quickly placed his hands in a seal. "**Juujin Bunshin (Beast-Man Clone)**!" He cried out before both of them leaping at a now-worried Naruto. "**Gatsuuga (Fang Over Fang)**!" Both of them spun in the air like drills and fell onto Naruto, blindisiding him and tossing him over.

Naruto cursed. If that snake-bastard hadn't messed up his chakra, he would have managed to escape, looking cool while doing it too, but it just didn't flow right. At least he could still move and quickly leapt away from another drill attack.

Damn them, it was so annoying, they had really good cooperation, dodging one placed him right into the path of the second while the first one recovered for another round. With a feral growl Naruto decided that taking one of them out would be more important than avoiding getting hit. At least they hadn't used any smoke bombs, or it would have been hard to find out who was who. That and Kiba always charged first, leading his enemy to Akamaru.

So, while dodging yet another attack from Kiba and coming face to face with Akamaru, he decided to change the rules of the game. Not dodging, he identified the direction of the spin and spun himself that way too. At the moment of collision, his leg lashed out and just a little bit into the drill.

His trouser was ripped off at thigh level and there were numerous gashes all the way up, but... A surprised and hurting Kiba was tossed out of his technique, rolling on the ground a bit before reverting to Akamaru.

The real Kiba landed next to his whimpering partner and growled. "You god-damned bastard! You hurt Akamaru! I'm going to KILL YOU!"

Then he was off in a weaker form of the Gatsuuga, the Tsuuga, or Drill Fang. Naruto had barely managed to properly land, still unable to balance properly on his torn leg and thus, unable to defend against Kiba's attack, which sent him rolling away.

"Now stay down, you little bastard!" Kiba snarled, his arrogance returning.

"Sorry to say this Kiba, but I'm going to win. I have some very important people believing in me. I won't loose." He was getting back up again, however shakily, making his enemy bark a laugh at him.

"Can't loose? Because they '_believe in you_'? What crap are you spouting, moron?" Sneered Kiba, ever arrogant. "All I see is a looser, a dead-last failure! Anyone who believes in you is just another fucking retard!" He seemed so proud of his insult too.

Up in the stands, Kakashi groaned, Sakura cringed and Sasuke snickered. The raven-haired boy just turned to Kurenai and mockingly stated. "Kurenai-sensei, you _may _want to interrupt the match if you want your puppy, I mean your student, in functioning condition in less than three months time. Naruto's about to stomp his ass into the curb and then blow the whole thing up."

Meanwhile Naruto seethed alone, his hair hiding his eyes who had began to glow as his chakra raged while he tried to retract it into his body. "_Retard... fucking retard... he called them retards..._" He mumbled making Kiba laugh and spout even more insults. Then Naruto stilled suddenly and his chakra seemed to die down. Truthfully, that made him scarier but Kiba was only barely beggining to understand that he might have said a few words too many. "Retards you called them, _Kiba-kun_? All of them are retards? All who believe in me, who give _meaning_ to me, are retards? Idiots, the lot of them? Sakura is a retard? Sasuke is a retard? Kakashi-sensei and Inari and all of Wave are retards? IS SANDAIME A FUCKING RETARD, KIBA?" He roared and then, like a coiled spring, his chakra erupted all around him, bringing its weight onto everyone in the arena. Anko would never admit it, but she found the blonde gennin _hot_.

More power than he had felt before, ever since the snake-bastard had sealed him anway, coursed in him, reminding him of the power he was used to wielding. So, he commanded it.

It answered. With a familiar placing of his hands, the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, the legendary Shadow Clone Technique, was activated, bringing with it the smoke that accompanied it before dispersing and revealing the result; three clones of Naruto, all seething with rage.

Up in the stands, Sasuke might have been angrily surprised that the blonde was still strong enough to rival him, but he was also relieved in a way; not just because he would have usually used this much chakra to summon a hundred clones, but also because he would be probably sticking to taijutsu; Kiba would live. If Naruto had been really serious, a single Haken blow would have split the arrogant mutt in half. Naruto might suck at kenjutsu, but his jutsu flowed according to his will and so made up for his lack of skill.

Still stunned somewhat by the fact that the village idiot could actually use clones, something he thought he'd never see, much less corporeal ones, judging by the shadows, Inuzuka Kiba was defenceless to the resulting assault.

Feeling his chakra flow strong, if completely irregular, for just a bit more, Naruto rushed Kiba. A few meters before reaching him, he used chakra to slide the last bit while he coiled his entire body under him.

"U!" A mighty kick collided with Kiba's stomach and launched him up.

"Zu! Ma!" Two clones appeared and gave another kick to his sternum.

"Ki!" The last clone appeared to give another push upwards, this time on the chin and making Kiba fly on his back.

The original was used as a leaping vault while he gathered several leaves hidden in his sleeves and tossed them up, aiding with wind-manipulation to get them to proper place.

"Na! Ru! To!" Each sound was accompanied with one of three kicks while the clones all fell into position and made the widely-known seals for the Kawarimi no Jutsu, knowing that with their chakra messed up, they wouldn't be able to do it the normal way.

Finally, the four leaves puffed into smoke, revealing the four Naruto's each spinning for a powerful mule kick. As one they called out their attack, striking simultaneously! "Shikyaku Rendan (Four-kicks Combo)!"

The sound of breaking bone and the meaty thud of a soft dead weight falling to the ground confirmed Naruto's victory over an unconscious Kiba with several broken ribs.

At last he had won, as he stood up just for the announcement to be made and Kakashi-sensei to come down and help him up the stairs, his leg still coudn't function well.

Near them, Gai was weeping rivers of tears, wishing that his beloved student had been there to see this. It was a magnificent combination of a simple D-rank jutsu with a bit of taijutsu to make a whole greater than the sum of its parts. Hearing Kurenai curse at loosing the bet (from which the green-dressed teacher had abstained as it dampened the Flames of Youth) and wondering how the blonde could have dealt so much damage, Gai turned to her, serious for a change. "This Shikyaku Rendan is a most youthful technique, Kurenai-sensei!" He cried out, getting the attention of everyone sans a smirking Naruto. "The body naturally rolls with blows made against it, it is an instinct, one we hone after hours and hours of youthful training under the foundain of youth! However, Naruto-kun unleashed all four kicks at the same time, removing the body's ability to move with the blow and lessen its impact! Moreover, since the blows were each in a direction opposite to each other, the damage was multiplied as the relative speed, and by extention force, were almost doubled! It truly is a wonderful technique, Naruto-kun! You _must_ tell me how you thought of it!"

Naruto's grin faded quickly, to return just as fast, but Gai and Kakashi caught it, Kurenai missing it due to her glaring at the taijutsu master and Asuma due to looking at the woman of his dreams.

"Err, I'd rather not. A... A taijutsu master must keep his... umm... youthful secrets, secret... to... ah... maintain his... uh... youthful youthfullness?" Naruto tried to speak 'Youth', but was having a hard time. Not that anyone could blame him for not sharing; he had gotten the idea for that technique not only from Sasuke's Shishi Rendan (which he had blatantly and shamelessly copied and would agree to doing so), but also because of how he had learned about removing the body's ability to roll with a blow; by _experience_.

"Yes! Most youthful of you, Naruto-kun!" Gai realized that there was a story behind this, so he resolved to remove some of the burden of Naruto's shoulders by drawing every eye onto himself. "OOOH! I shall learn this technique! Its youthfullness will revitalize my Springtime Of Youth! I shall learn it in a day! And if I can't, I shall race three times around Konoha on my fingers! And if I can't will make one thousand pushups on my pointer! And if I can't I'll-"

"That's quite enough, Gai. I'm sure you'll learn it in due time." Kakashi tried to calm down his excitable friend. "Besides, the next fight is coming."

In the meantime however, Sasuke had approached Naruto, looking somewhat angry. "Naruto! You..."

"Yeah, I copied your move. It really saved me, Sasuke! Thanks! If you hadn't found out how to do it, I'd have been out for the count, man! You're awesome!"

Sasuke grunted, at least the dobe understood who was the better man here... No, wait, at least he thanked him for helping him get better, that's what he meant. Ugh, such a nasty headache... He had to sit down a bit to calm down.

And he sat down, next to his team, looking at the now-shaking Hinata. Well, she always was a meek one, but he had never seen her so terrified, not to mention the way Kurenai-sensei was biting her lip, she looked very worried.

It only took a bit of recalling to understand why, and he winced in sympathy. Neji was her cousin, but they were Hyuuga first and foremost. A clan that, under the guise of nobility and blood purity, _enslaved_ and _tortured_ the majority of the clan except for the Main Family, which composed of the patriarch and firstborn child. Everyone else, even secondborn children and even twins... They were all sealed by a lethal seal that could kill them with just a handseal and a bit of chakra.

For a so-called 'noble' clan... they sure were _barbaric_. Even the Uchiha who had no talent as shinobi and couldn't activate the sharingan had a place in his clan; they worked to make sure they all prospered, no one was wasted or enslaved. No, the Uchiha was definitely a much better clan than the Hyuuga.

Then it was what Neji was telling to poor Hinata, even he had to feel pity for the girl. He might not like her, _at all_, but she was kind and caring to all, she never wanted to hurt a fly. Sure, that made her a bad kunoichi, but to degrade her like this? Even to Sasuke it seemed like a bit too much.

"Do your best Hinata!" A certain loudmouthed blonde shouted all of a sudden. "Make that arrogant ass eat the stick he's shoved up his ass! I believe that you can beat him!"

It had seemed as if the girl drew strength from his words and a resolve to fight, likely a side-effect from her huge crush on the blonde. But Sasuke turned to Naruto questioningly, catching his eye. "Why?"

"Look at her Sasuke..." Said Naruto as the two Hyuuga began fighting, with Hinata loosing badly. "Look at her _eyes_ Sasuke..." Both winced as the girl was tossed back, whimpering in pain and getting unsteadily back on her feet. The two Hyuuga circled each other, finally allowing Sasuke to look at her eyes. "They're so..."

"_Familiar_... She's... just like... us?" He breathed out, unevenly, shocked.

Naruto ignored Sakura's own shock that he seemed to have more in common with the Hyuuga girl, especially since it wasn't something that Sakura herself could discern, and nodded grimly. "Almost... She's almost had it as bad as us, Sasuke. But she... She never found her strength, her _calling_, Sasuke... She needs this, she needs to see this through. She needs _someone_ to believe in her, especially since not even her own team and _sensei_ do." He snarled poisonously at Kurenai and the rest of her team. It was a look of pure loathing, hatred and disgust, one that was quickly mirrored in Kakashi's and Sasuke's eyes as they caught on to Naruto's words.

Not once since the girl had gone down, did her team ever give her encouragement; they instead told her to quit and give up.

"Kurenai." Kakashi's voice was ice-cold and made the jounin shiver. "After this, we'll be having a _talk_ about your student. _IF_ she's still going to be yours. You can count on the fact that I _will_ look into this." Kakashi had been known to be an aloof man, and he was so by choice as well as nature. But, these past few months, the company of these three children, had been life-changing for him. He found himself going from hating kids to actually considering them _his_ kids. As such, he was extremely angry at any teacher that didn't do their best to help their student alone, if not in jutsu at least in counceling.

Now Sasuke looked on with more interest, the little Hyuuga hadn't given up. Her cousin, _Neji_ he thought with hate, had cut off all her chakra circulation and was mocking her, taunting her, insulting her.

And she still _would not give up_! She just stood up again and forewent her clan's fighting style just to try to hit him, one more time!

Her voice, shaky and hurt and wet from the blood that was trickling down her lips, gave Sasuke a new realization, an epiphany;"I will not give up... It is... my ninja way."

As soon as she had said that, Neji's eyes had changed from simply hateful to murderous and with another spout about how he was going to kill her, he hesitated only for a second; the second it took Hinata to tell her cousin that she pitied him because he always suffered just as hard as her, going against his own fate.

Sasuke didn't know how he got up or when he was on the rail or even when he had lept, Naruto's unmistakeable presence right next to him, as they both made their way as fast as they could racing against time to stop a murder from occuring.

It was unnecessary, the room's jounin had interfered, even Gai had appeared in front of his student, grasping his hand.

Sasuke had the slight idea that Kakashi had really wanted to hold something to his hand while he grasped Neji from the back of his neck like an unruly cat.

"More protection for the Main House!" Shouted Neji, but only until he realized that there was an unbelievable amount of killer intent aimed towards him.

Sasuke and Naruto stood side-by-side as they glared holes into the boy, their hate making their eyes almost take an unearthly glow. Both of them bringing up memories of their painful childhoods, they were not about to let that annoying bastard insult someone who was so much like them!

Up in the rail, Gaara's eyes widened when he felt a familiar power awaken, so similar to his but also several _times_ more potent and dangerous.

Kakashi was about to release the white-eyed brat he was holding, _'Do not snap his neck, do not stab a kunai through his neck, do not rip his eyes out, I don't want to- oh, hell, I DO want to!'_, and go to calm his student from doing something that few in the room would regret but would lead to him regretting it, when the spell was broken; Hinata coughed.

Medics had been on their way even as Hinata fell for the last time, examining her while Gai escorted (read; pulled) his student away, and shouting their findings to each other.

"Damn it! Her chakra system's collapsing!"

"Multiple damage to her lungs!"

"Heartrate dropping fast, internal injuries!"

"What's her chakra doing, it's all messed up! It's like her chakra system's turned on itself, it looks like it's cannibalizing itself!"

Hinata had been maybe the Hyuuga to have been struck by the Jyuken style the most ever since its inception. The body's own adaptability, and her own wish to not die, had led to her 'evolving' a natural counter to its damage. But, to activate these countermeasures, it took a large amount of chakra from her, and she never was someone with large reserves in any way. In short, her own body was eating her alive, trying to save itself.

It was only when a medic announced that she seemed to be 'draining his chakra' that Naruto realized that, maybe conventional healing techniques wouldn't suffice. If her body wanted to eat chakra, then maybe that's exactly what they should be doing, right? He _could_ do something about it, but with his chakra so off-kilter... Unless... "Sakura-chan!" He cried to his team-mate who had come down the stairs to all the commotion, wanting to help the medics in any way she could. The girl looked at him curiously and he took a deep breath. "Sakura-chan, remember when I taught you and Sasuke how to infuse chakra to leaves and flowers, without damaging them?" It had taken quite a bit of work to learn how to do it too, but both Sakura and Sasuke had mastered it. She nodded. "Maybe... maybe we need to give her some chakra, maybe that's why her body's draining the doctors' chakra."

"You're right, the body's own immunization system might be taking the chakra but..." Sakura looked sceptical as she had her mind race through a number of scenarios and possibilities. But, in the end, she was just as stumped as the medics. "What can we do though?"

"We... we can give her some of ours." Now the medics and even jounin were looking disbelievingly at the blonde; not only was he a jinchuuriki, but he also knew nothing of healing techniques. What could he do? "I could give her my chakra but... well, it's kind of... poisonous to most people, dunno why." He lied and the jounin sighed in relief that he hid that fact. "Normally, I can screen the toxicity, that's why my jutsu works, I can even enhance plants, as you remember." Now most jounin were looking at each other wondering if the boy actually had the Mokuton. It was wrong, of course, but it was always their hope that someone, anyone, would come forth with that legendary bloodline once more. "But my chakra's all messed up, something that Orochimaru-guy did to me. I can barely get it to flow right, much less infuse something without even a handseal... But you... You can do it, can't you, Sakura-chan? You have the best control out of all of us, so if I channel some of my chakra inside you... you could..."

"...Act as a buffer to your own..." Sakura finished, thinking, before nodding. "Medic-san, please make some room, me and my team might... might be able to help, even a bit." She said as both her and Naruto took position over the unconscious girl, the blonde's hands over her own.

A third set of hands were placed over theirs and they both looked at their dark-haired team mate. "What?" He grunted. "Between the three of us, it should be easy. I'll act as Naruto's first filter while you act as buffer. On three. One... Two..." Sakura's hands clenched to steady them and she closed her eyes to better feel with her chakra, feeling her connection to Sasuke form, a funnel straight into her hands. "Three."

Naruto's chakra didn't flow. It spilled. Like water spills from a glass knocked over, so did his chakra, carelessly gushing out, its flow irregular, and he strained to control it to an at least manageable level.

Sasuke grit his teeth as he felt the raw energy settle on his hands almost like a physical weight, so _potent_ it was, but he quickly channeled as much as he could into Sakura in a steady flow. The rest, what he couldn't safely channel, was absorbed into his body, making up for the occasional 'shortage' of chakra, when the funnel drained just before the next pulse, and filling his own reserves with Naruto's chaotic, _shivering_ almost, energy.

Sakura felt the most. As the one least used to having huge amounts of chakra flow through her body, it felt like she was directly plugged into a transformer plant and doused in water. She had, quite plainly, more power in her hands than she could _use_! And there was no sign of it stopping or slowing down or even calming! It fell on her hands like a_ waterfall_ and she had to transform it into a gentle river, slowly pour it into Hinata's chest and gently nudge it to refill her strained system... Not once could she let it go faster, or swirl or change or do anything other than slowly flow into her.

It didn't last long, it couldn't. But, in those short seconds that it did, Sakura realized that if Naruto could unleash so much chakra into her, after also loosing quite a bit in the transfer... The blonde had so much chakra it was _unreal_! She was quite aware that she had very little in terms of amount, but what Naruto had was... It was an ocean to her drops!

_Huge chakra reserves and poisonous chakra_. Both Sakura and Sasuke thought, filing it away in their minds as one more of their team-mate's weird riddles. Riddles they wanted answered.

But for now, Team Seven was content to lie back and bask in the relief that they had helped their classmate, evident through the relief of the working doctors, now stating that her body was recovering at a fast rate, her system no longer cannibalizing itself. Of course the internal injuries were still dangerous and life-threatening, but at least now they could work on them instead of having to fight against her body to get to them.

Sasuke allowed himself a smirk at a happily sighing Sakura, but Naruto wasn't nearly as over. Scooping up some of the blood Hinata had coughed out, he ritually painted his face. A red line over each eye lid, another down his nose and two over his whiskers, ending with a tap on each of his knuckles. He took a few steps towards a scowling Neji and didn't glare. Didn't grin maliciously. Didn't scowl. He simply stated a few words, like the truth they were. "When you and I fight... I will pay you back for her pain. I will **crush** you, Hyuuga Neji Kinslayer." Then he turned his back and went to his team, leaving a very worried Kakashi behind.

Because Kakashi, and indeed every person in that room that knew about the Uzumaki, knew what Naruto had done. Ritualistically placing blood on himself in this kind of patterns signified a Blood Oath. Naruto hadn't just stated the beatdown that would occur. He had just told everyone that there was a person he was never going to work with, a person that, given half a chance, he would remove from the world.

It was hot-headed, Kakashi agreed, just like Naruto. Just like an Uzumaki. Just like Kushina-sama.

Up in the stands, the Sandaime sighed. Seems like Naruto was more like his mother than his father. His aged bones felt brittle when he remembered that one of these days, probably in little over a month from this day, he would be telling the truth to Naruto. He only hoped that the blonde would forgive him, he had done everything he could to protect him but... It had not been enough, not nearly enough. And it was time to pay the geisha, as the saying goes.

The tournament was quickly ended there, rather hastily too, lest 'someone' offed 'someone else'. Hayate came up with a board and some papers, letting everyone who passed choose one of them, each scribbled with a number on it. According to the proctor, there would be several fights, the winner of each going to fight each other until there came a victor. Who won the third part wouldn't matter, but fighting more times meant more chances to show off your skills, and any one of them could get promoted -or none of them at all.

As if Fate herself decided to make up for tossing Naruto into a shithole, the fickle mistress gave him his heart's desire; he would be the first to fight. And he would fight against Hyuuga Neji.

Kakashi reminded himself he would have to come early that day and bet quite the sum on his student. His brat wouldn't rest until Neji was eating through a straw, and he would stop if and only if Hinata asked him to spare his cousin.

Sasuke would fight Gaara as the last match, not that he was too keen on it. Something on the red-head rubbed him the wrong way, something very familiar to both Naruto and Orochimaru. He'd have to take it seriously if he wanted to win. He _would_ win. He was an Uchiha, there was no other way.

After that little announcement, each sensei quietly took their students to one of the many rooms from which they would be escorted out of the Training Grounds in which they had spend almost a week in. But Kakashi first had to do a small ritual, albeit a very painful one.

Written seals seemed to flow into Sasuke's shoulder , coalescing around the tree-tomoe mark on it, a circle of unintelligible, yet powerful at the same time, lines surrounding it. All through that, Sasuke was screaming in agony, almost as great as when he received the mark, and truly a dangerous mark it was as Kakashi told them. A seal by Orochimaru to gain control of whoever carries it, corrupting them to become his servants.

Sasuke swore there and then to not fall to its influence, as weak and almost unconscious as he was.

Naruto on the other hand, decided to poke fun at his friend and ask him if he still retained his masochistic tendencies, then all Oro-pedo would have to do is keep hurting him. Sasuke reacted very maturely and stuck out his tongue at his friend, too tired to argue further.

But Kakashi was sad it wasn't time for further joking, both his students would have serious fights in just thirty days, and his last one would also have to improve herself significantly to be able to enter the next exam. "Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto, we must discuss the upcoming month, especially your study plans. Naruto, anything you have in mind, a strategy against Neji?"

At the boy's name, Naruto's countenance changed to imply barely contained malice and hatred. "Yeah... keep the fuck away from him and pelt the place with explosive tags through my Kage Bunshin. That should get him just fine but... But I don't want him just defeated." He snarled. "I want him destroyed, his pride in ruins, his arrogance shattered, I want him not just beaten, I want him to understand every single bit of pain he caused to Hinata!" He took a short breath to calm himself a bit, but the malicious glint in his eyes didn't abate all that much. "I'm going to kick his ass, sensei. And I'm going to do it from close range. I have a jutsu I'm working on, if I finish it, it will allow anyone to take down a Hyuuga for fun. I'll be researching too, want to learn a few things about seals, see if I can write some on my leaves and deliver them from afar or something like that."

Kakashi hummed and turned to his other student. "Sasuke, you have Gaara, what about you?"

"Beat him, hands down kick his ass. He's strong though and tough... Well, not tough, Lee almost beat him despite his bad match-up. But he has a great defence, it's unbelievable how strong it is, I don't know of any way of breaking through it... I can probably avoid his attacks, but if I can't land a good blow..." His voice trailed off in shame; he wanted to win dammit and his enemy wouldn't be hurt with anything he had!

_**'Not with anything **_**you**_** have, but someone may have something you can take...'**_

Sasuke shook his head from the seductive whisper that reminded him of the power Orochimaru used so casually and turned to his teacher. Kakashi was nodding with Sasuke's words, reinforcing his belief of what he should do next. "I thought so, Gaara truly has a powerful defence... Which is why, sorry Naruto, but I will be training Sasuke one-on-one for the next month." He raised a hand to stop any of the resulting complaints, though none came anyway, despite a small accusing glare from Naruto. "You said it yourself Naruto, you can handle Neji for the most part, but Gaara is a whole other mess. Also, Neji probably won't kill you, Gaara will. Besides, it's not if I'll leave you completely helpless; I've been looking for a... friend of mine, he's a much better teacher than I am Naruto, at least when it comes to people like you. You have to admit that I'm more suited to teaching Sasuke, I... I regret this, but I haven't been able to teach yo much." He grinned at Naruto's cries that he had learned plenty, but he shook his head sadly. "No, Naruto, each student is different, you have different needs and different strengths. It just so happens that I am a better teacher for Sasuke than anyone else in the village. I should be able to get _your_ teacher pretty soon too, but until then, I'll see what I can do for you, see if I can train Sasuke and you at the same time with one of the Kage Bunshins you love so much."

"S-sensei? W-what about me?" Sakura asked meekly, they had completely overlooked her, not that she blamed them. She was the weakest member of their team, the only one not to advance...

Kakashi caught on to her thoughts and sighed. "Indeed, what about you, Sakura..." He sighed once more. "If I'm not a good enough teacher for Naruto, I'm probably the worst possible teacher for you. Your actions today proved that the medical pursuits suit you best, but besides some basic first-aid, my talents point at death rather than life." He shrugged as if not caring about it too much. "Truth is, there's not much else I can teach you besides things you learn by doing, Naruto has already taught us all a technique that is more important for healing than anything _I_'ve done." He nodded to Naruto, remembering his chakra channeling technique. "I'll see what I can do to set up a few doctors or combat medics to teach you some things, but apart from that... I'm afraid you're on your own Sakura, unless of course Tsunade-sama suddenly decides to come back to Konoha, which I would probably bet against."

When Kakashi deposited them out of his Shunshin no Jutsu, which he still made look cool, carrying three kids on him while doing it, Sasuke and Naruto exchanged a new promise. They would not loose to anyone until they got to fight each other in the final stage. Then, they'd show just how good shinobi they are.

Meanwhile in another office, the aged Hokage of Konoha was talking with one of his jounin, one Yamanaka Inoichi, father of Yamanaka Ino. "So, you noticed that technique Team Seven used to aid Hyuuga Hinata, correct, Inoichi-san?" Sandaime puffed out a bit of smoke and getting a nod. "Is it the same as what you encountered while taking care of Naruto's plants?"

"Yes, Hokage-sama." Inoichi replied, thinking back to that event. "As I told you then, the subject, Uzumaki Naruto, did not make all of his clones at the same time, nor were they equal parts of a whole. Instead, he seemed to create each one individually and give them the vast majority of his chakra while doing so. Normally, that would have meant that the ninja would be unable to function while lacking approximately ninety-percent of their chakra, but the subject's special... condition... allowed him to recover the entirety of their internal energies in the time it took us to seal each clone." Inoichi took a deep breath, before beginning again. "Each time a clone was unsealed, he would spend a few hours taking care of the plants and, though I was often called to help in the physical work that sometimes was included, would end their life not by dispelling, but by channeling the entirety of their remaining chakra, approximately seventy-five-percent of the original, into a single, specific plant. As I told you then, I am a bit of a sensor, though nowhere near a Hyuuga, but I witnessed something most peculiar; not only did the tree seem to absorb the chakra without problems, but it also seemed to spread it equally all over its body, as if it possessed a chakra circulatory system, though not one that can produce chakra. Most of that energy seemed to bedirected to each one of the tree's pollinated flowers and simply... reside there."

"I see... Thank you for repeating your report. I'll have to ask Naruto-kun about it sometime later, Inoichi-san." The aged leader puffed some more smoke, considering what Naruto could have possibly been doing. "Though I do not doubt that Naruto-kun has our best interests at heart, it is worrisome what could possibly be a reason to use so much chakra..."

At the same time, in another building, a man with yellow, slitted eyes was glaring at his cowering henchman. "You failed me. Do not do so again, or the results will be much worse than what you experienced this time. Are we clear, Kabuto-kun?"

"Yes... my master..."

**A/N: And another one bites the dust. After the previous family-sized chapter of 21.5 Wordpad pages (around forty or more Word, mind you) chapter, I'm winding this one down a bit and prepping for a transition chapter before the exams. Also, there was little room for my regular crack here, though I guess many of you have had some great ideas (if you have one that can be inserted without altering the story, then forward them and I'll probably edit the chapter).**

**Now, a very important question: What about Naruto's Summoning contract? Should it stay with the Toads? Should I make one with the Gurahl (Whitewolf's Werebears, they're awesome)? Or should I make one with his plant friends (various castes of dryads, Ents, Treants, assasin vines, pixies, animal-like animated bushes...)? I really, **_**really**_** like the last one, as I find the Toads to be overused and generally annoying, but it would take the most time for Naruto to gain and I don't want to mix in too much of Naruto's partnership with nature, it's supposed to be him being just 'that good' rather some sort of bloodline... Ideas/Suggestions? Please, people, otherwise I'll stick with the Toads and they're **_**boring**_**!**

**Naruto's jutsu are not bloodlines, he's just 'that good'. His semi-bloodline only allows him an instinctive understanding of what plants want and, with enough work, also allow him to 'bio-engineer' them to a point. So, yes, at some point, he is both going to learn more normal jutsu as well as allow others to use his own too, in fact he's already been teaching several people (Kakashi, Sasuke, Sakura and one more I shall keep to myself for now). I will hopefully avoid using his plants too much because, if I also use what I've made for Omakes, he's going to be **_**way**_** overpowered. Not that I mind too much, but I'd like to keep the focus on Naruto rather than anything else.**

**OMAKE CORNER**

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouse Scene Four:**

Naruto's most obvious estates are his Greenhouse and Glasshouse. Many know of them, they have seen him walk in there. But only a few know that he also owns a nearby, still inside the Village Walls, tree grove. The trees there have grown thick and tight and it is surrounded by a large, concrete fence. One would have to be desperate to try and find a way inside it.

And Tora the Daimyo's cat, was definitely desperate enough to crawl in through one of the few, tiny mouseholes. The cat looked terrible; its once luxurious orange fur was now charcoal black, bits of its muscles and bones sticking out from the mangled mess it once was. The light in the cat's eyes was rapidly diminishing, but its instinct to 'seek refuge' guided it to one of the few places it knew someone would take care of it, like Yellow-fur, he always left her some milk and bits of meat. The Green ones might also take pity on poor, poor Tora and keep her for a bit.

Better than that crazy Black-fur that tried to... to... He made fire and steel-claws and hurt her, hurt her so bad, so very, very bad...

Tora crawled inside the tree grove, just the few meters it took to reach the smaller of leaf-ponds and dunked her head inside. She didn't know when green-tinged, gentle fingers touched her fur and root-like hands lifted her off.

Curious eyes, some green, others blue and yet some more red, looked at her broken form. Women, with a green tinge to their otherwise perfect skin held her form close, while men, these tall as a building with skin like bark and bodies like bi-rooted trees, provided shade, their deep, resonating voices calling all those that were borne of The Maker to their grove.

Soon, many more came. Women in transparent shawls, crawling vines with leaves the shape of hands and even little humans, big enough to curl up on your palm to sleep, with gossamer wings and cheery laughs. All answered the call of the Wise Ones.

All peered into the form of the poor, hurt, dieing cat. Why would humans do this? Why did humans hurt each other?

Oh, the Green Ones know what it is to forage for food, many of them are mortal enemies in any other time of day, but why would humans use The Great Curse, what The Maker calls 'fire', to hurt something so badly?

The dryads sang with none of their usual joy, the treants boomed annoyed and assassin vines waved their hands angrily, not even bothering to grasp any of the many, buzzing pixies.

The Tora-Cat meowed pathetically, it didn't want to hurt or hunger or run no more. It didn't want to die, it wanted to live. The Green Ones took pity on her and retreated to their meadow to discuss their actions.

Finally, the Wise Ones had come to a decision and their oldest, one that looked like a yew tree with a foot-long white-moss beard looked at all those around him, as he placed the Tora-Cat on a small altair, generously provided by one of the many Ents of the grove, trees related to the Treants in moving and awareness, but unable to uproot themselves.

_"Gentletrees and ladyflowers, mushrooms and mosses and bushes too... This is a cat... This is a dieing cat... We can save her. We can remake her. Better, stronger, smarter, faster... Greenborn... we have the power, we have the knowledge and we have the permission from the Maker, though that may be due to his ramen overdose." _He muttered the last, but the trixies giggled with the dryads. _"Let us go forth and do what no one else has attempted before... Lady Neira, the spores if you please."_

Dryad woodshapers sang and made plants grow and wrap around the cat, covering her recovering form with the bulb of a flesh-colored flower.

The majority of the excitement over, and having notoriously short attention spans, the assassin vines tried to catch some of the curious trixies, but the little flower nymphs quickly flew away to hide in the Wise Ones beards.

It was several days later when the flower bud finally bloomed, revealing the new creature that had been housed within.

Tora was now bigger, almost the size of a large wolf. She now had fur made out of moss and soft leaves, alternating a deep emerald and light green color as stripes. Where she once had flesh and bone now she had strong, flexible bark and wood, small roots protruding from her feet to burry into the soft soil, gaining the nutrients she now needed. From her mouth protruded rosethorn teeth and her bright green eyes glowed with The Life.

The Old One looked at their latest creation and smiled slowly, his bark flaking off as it moved. _"Go now, Tora... Our work here is done."_

_"Not Tora, no. I am the protector of flowers and plants everywhere, the mighty GardenCat!"_

And so, a new legend arose, of a green cat that ran through meadows and gardens, ready to punish those who cut plants and hurt flowers, by the power of The Green!

So next time you try to cut a flower or step on grass, take a look around, the GardenCat may be close!

**Harry Potter And The Origins Of The Whomping Willow**

Few ever asked the Whomping Willow why she was so grumpy.

Truth be told, she was alone, so alone for so long, the only Ent left in the world and nobody ever bothered to care about her.

Her passed-down memories, left over from her mother's sap that flowed into her seed while she was still un-rooted, told her that there had been a great person who would have loved her, The Maker.

Not even Albus Dumbledore, in all his infinite wisdom, would ever understand what made the Whomping Willow not attack blond-haired, blue-eyed boys, but anyone with black eyes and hair was in mortal peril within her reach.

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	11. Chapter 11

_Chapter 11: Midori no Naegi-tachi (Green Saplings)_

Gennin Tenten was annoyed. No, not annoyed, she was _pissed off_. Not just pissed off either, she was _'I want to stab someone repeatedly where it hurts the most but bleeds little'_ pissed off. The reason? She had lost.

She had lost her chance at a promotion even when her teacher had held her back for a year... Not only did she loose badly either, but other gennin passed, despite not being held back!

No, she hadn't just lost; she had been _steamrolled_, she had been _dominated_, she had been _owned_. That Suna bitch had owned her ass and done it easily.

So, understandably, Tenten was now looking for a clear Training Ground in which she could engage in some creative destruction therapy.

She had drawn her sealing scroll out of her pocket even, when she realized that the thudding sounds weren't from her imagination, but rather from someone practicing. So, using her ninja skills, she snuck over to see who it was.

_'Oh! Oh my... Oh, _very_ nice... Very nice indeed!_ Tenten would fiercely advocate she most definitely did _not_ drool, but the truth is a harsh mistress.

A few meters ahead, there was a figure practicing against one of the many mannequin opponents that littered the area, and the major reason she had gone there. A figure that lacked any form of garment on his upper body, sans a very tight and sweaty shirt, which in turn revealed the toned and muscled physique, despite the otherwise young age.

Blonde hair whipped over bright blue eyes as the figure danced around the mannequine. A kick-back on the chest pushed him away and he dashed forward, sliding the last few meters, right kick raised before unleashing a dozen kicks, all in the space of a few seconds. Kicks turned to a high jump that had the user spin behind the enem and place the inside of his foot at his target's throat and pull himself on his back while kicking with the other, a combination that would crush the throat and neck of a human easily. But it did not end there as the figure quickly twirled away, landing on his hands and spinning like a top, unleashing a few quick hits before coiling and leaping off again in an acrobatic spinning leap that brought the inside of a shin ready to go down on the wooden head, but changed direction at the last minute and continuing the spin to give a mighty heel drop kick over the top of the wooden head.

Not being able to take any more, the wooden doll was decapitated.

The figure, Naruto, landed lightly and sighed, first tensing and then relaxing his muscles with a drawn out breath. Then, he took a small bottle of water, drank a sip, and emptied the rest over his head, making his clothes stick to his skin _even_ more.

And causing poor Tenten to gulp uncomfortably.

Being the sole girl of a team of men, two of which wearing spandex every day, had given her a pretty good idea of how most men look. During her time as a member of Team Gai, she had quickly changed herself cfrom a Neji fan-girl to one wondering how she could get Lee to change his wardrobe so she could snatch him for herself. Aristocratic, dark features are cute. A body that can do a hundred pushups on his _tongue_ is...

So yes, Tenten had a very good idea of how men looked and what she wanted from a boy. She had never thought that runt had it in him, what with his ridiculous orange jumpsuit getting in the way, but he was _built_. He was no adult and yet he had clearly defined muscles, a wiry yet strong physique and quite plainly every sexy thing that Lee's body had without the problem of bug-eyes, bowl-hair and an obsessive personality (besides his apparent insanity, but she suspected it was more a way to unsettle people).

Taking a step back, wondering if she should find another training spot or just go to her appartment and the solitude it offered, Tenten forgot to step over a branch behind her. The resulting crack made her cringe at her lack of focus and the blonde to turn at her curiously. Realizing she had no way out of it, she took a deep breath and walked out of her cover.

_'Damn! He looks better up close! Look at those abs!'_ She gulped and tried to focus her eyes into his own.

Not much success there either. _'They're so... blue... Like a slightly clouded sky, or a frothing sea or... Oh, dammit girl, focus here!'_

"Umm... hi there, Naruto-san." She greeted, after managing to collect herself.

Realizing that the girl was distracted, and probably also distraught, Naruto decided to make a small joke, So he looked curiously around him, as if searching for someone.

"Umm... Naruto-san? What are you looking for?"

"Eh? Oh, the other two of me, I'm Naruto-three, so where is Naruto-two and Naruto-one?" He asked playing with the suffix '-san', which also meant 'three'.

"Naruto-three... San..." Tenten blinked a bit surprised before giggling at it.

"Yup, yup, unless there's another two of me here, just call me Naruto. So, how have you been? How did you escape prison so quickly?"

"Prison?"

"The _Hospital_." He shuddered dramatically. "I tell them but no one listens! Hospitals are part of a continent-wide conspiracy to suck our souls! They hate the _Ramen_!" He looked a bit faint as well as horrified there, causing Tenten to break down in laughing until her ribs hurt. "So? What brings you here, want to vent some too?" He asked after she recovered.

"Y-Yeah... wait, you were venting too? What for? I mean... I mean you passed, right?" She asked, somewhat angry at not doing the same, though most of it was against her own weakness.

"Passed... Yeah, I did... No, I'm not venting because of that." He seemed to be getting angrier by the second here. "It's thanks to your team-mate, Hyuuga Neji." The name was snarled out, lips curling up to reveal larger than normal incissors. "That bastard... Just winning against Hinata wasn't good enough for him... He had to demean her, berate her, insult her, he found it necessary to try and destroy her own determination to abide by her nindo... and then he tried to _kill_ her. His own cousin!"

"W-what? N-Neji did? B-But... I... I mean, I know he's angry about the whole Main Branch thing but... but to kill, to actually _kill_, his cousin?" She was horrified, Neji wouldn't have done something like that... would he? No matter how much of an arrogant, cold jerk he was, he wouldn't... his own cousin, his own blood...

"He _did_. The medics barely saved her, we almost lost her for a bit and... I'm sorry, Tenten, but when I meet him in the third part, I'm going to **destroy **that arrogant son of a bitch." There was not hate there, there was fury, anger and a rage barely held back. "Nothing against you of course, but I'm an orphan and... hurting your own flesh and blood just doesn't sit right with me."

"You... won't kill him right? He's an ass, but killing him would make you just as bad as him."

"No, not kill him. But I'm going to hurt him. I'm going break him. I'm going to absolutely _shatter_ his pride and arrogance and show that jerk just how good it feels to be totally outclassed by someone." It was a cold statement, like a judgement. Naruto wasn't discussing a point, he was stating a fact. "But, that's not important, I'm here because I'm bored really, my teacher's been late in coming, so I decided to practice a little bit. What about you?"

By now the girl had sat down on the grass, trying to put the fate of Neji (oh how ironic, she thought) behind her. "Yeah... I... well, I lost, badly. So, I want to improve but... Gai-sensei's fretting over Lee and Neji... He's an ass, a royal ass. Not just because of what he did to his cousin, but even before that, he never cared for us, his team. As long as he got to advance, as long as he got the reward, it didn't matter about us. As long as he got stronger, me and Lee could just die. I couldn't go to anyone for training, so I thought I could train here for a bit... and vent, too."

"Yeah, that Suna girl really did destroy you, huh? It was a bad match-up though, I'm a wind user too so I know how easy it is to make a barrier of wind to deflect projectiles. She's more proficient than me, but yeah, I can do it too. Or... I could anyway... Can't do much jutsu lately, some snake-using bastard hit me with a seal and my control's shot."

"A seal? What seal? Maybe I know about it?" Tenten was curious and willing to help the blonde, not only was he friendly, but he was also hot, and would only get sexier as he got older. Best to get started in winning the future hunk's affections from early on. Get a head start before the other girls got to see him.

"He called it... Gogyo Fuuin... If I recall... It hurt like hell too, almost knocked me out. Dunno how to get it off though... Maybe once my teacher shows up I'll go to the old-man Hokage, he'll at least know someone who can help."

"Gogyo Fuuin... No, can't say I've heard of it... Who applied it?"

"I think, no I believe, it was Orochimaru of the Sannin. Snake-related jutsu, slippery as hell, yellow slitted eyes and snake summons. No, I'm sure it was Orochimaru, he even _felt_ wrong, like his chakra was... I dunno, _purple_ rather than blue. Anyway, my problem will be solved soon, I think. But what about you? How do you intend to get stronger?"

"Orochimaru of the Sannin, but, how do you care about _me_ if you have an S-rank ninja after you?" She was incredulous now, and a little bit touched.

"Oro-teme got to me in order to get to Sasuke, my team-mate you know. I'm not his target and Sasuke is... well, he's safe. He won't be found, much less approached, not even I know where he is. But he's alright. Orochimaru won't come after me and, even if he does, I don't have anyone I'd need to protect right now, so I can just run the freaking hell away from that freak." He gave her a grin. "But we're talking about _you_, Tenten-chan. So, what were you thinking about?"

"B-but... Ugh, you won't change your mind, will you?" After a happy 'nope!', she sighed and smiled at him. "Well... I was trying to get better generally... Fire more ninja weapons, get better accuracy, things like that."

"Hm... so what about jutsu? You have that Soushouryu thing, which was amazingly awesome by the way, but I didn't see any other. What else do you have?" He was met with a sheepish look.

"Umm... that... that was actually it... Soushouryu is my strongest and, well only, jutsu. I just... don't know what else I could do. I mean, I don't have a clan to teach me and Gai-sensei never teaches us jutsu so..."

Now Naruto sat down next to her and picked up a leaf, showing it to her. Then, with a ram seal to help focus his chakra, and cursing that Orochimaru guy to Hell and beyond for doing this to him, Naruto made the leaf levitate, spin and surround itself with a distortion in the wind. "You have everything you need, Tenten-chan. You just have to find out different ways to use it. See this leaf? I know where it is, no matter where it's placed, my chakra will always tell me where it is. Also, I can replace myself with this leaf in an instant." Finally, he simply waved with his hand and had it cut right into the fallen wooden head nearby. "Or I can use it as a projectile. And all that comes from just using wind chakra. With more leaves, I can do more things, like a shield or sword, or even spin hundreds of them around me to create a smokescreen, or leafscreen in this case, or just all-out cut my enemies to ribbons." He gave her a smug grin at her awed look. "I can do that with just a _leaf_. What can you do with actual blades? I saw your accuracy, it's great, but, that's just it. You need to branch out, not get away from your major advantages, but use something to multiply the power of your advantages."

Now Tenten was pensive, and thoughtful as well. "Well... I'm good with weapons... that's just it really..."

"That's it? No, Tenten-chan, that's most definitely not 'it'. Weapons, weapons... let's see, how about tieing them up with ninja wire, and changing their path mid-flight?" Tenten waved it off, she'd done it before. "Then how about... wait, what chakra nature are you, anyway?"

"Umm... I, I don't know?" She gave a sheepish look. "When Gai-sensei tested us, I refused. I just don't want to use regular ninjuttsu. I just... I just want to be _me_, I want to be _original_."

"So did I, which led to me making my Leaf Ninja Arts, which you can learn too, by the way, but it's going to take some time, they're not that easy. Besides, when making a new technique, not everything has to be high-level; one of my best jutsu combines the Kawarimi with a B-rank concealing, and it's good enough to slow down Momochi Zabuza of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist. And before you start, yeah, his sword's awesome, but I don't think he'd hand it over for more than a few minutes. Anyway, what I'm saying is use ninjutsu in new an cool way, supplement your existing skills with your weaponry..."

"Like what? No family scrolls here, remember? No high-power jutsu like everybody else has." She was quite bitter over that fact, one of the reasons her crush on Neji had died quickly. It _is_ rather hard to keep liking a boy that ignores your existence on the grounds that you have no family scrolls. Oh, how she wished that she was in fact the last survivor of a powerful clan, one that even the Hyuuga would be jealous of... "I don't even know my chakra element..."

Naruto hummed a bit. Chakra paper was ridiculously expensive and forbidden to gennin, since it had so many more properties than just testing chakra type. But of course, it was nothing special, as paper anyway, no seals or special stuff into it... Maybe if he could... "Hm... Tell me, Tenten-chan, what if you met me here tomorrow, say, seven in the morning? I might have something I could use to help determine your affinity. Until then though, we can brainstorm anyway. How about using the Bunshin no Jutsu (Clone technique) on your weapons? You could confuse your enemy on which is real! Or, I could see if I could alter the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, which is like the normal Bunshin, but actually corporeal. Oh, you use seals right? Can you create, or buy, a seal that stores chakra? If we could attach them to your weapons, then you would be able to Kawarimi right next to them, rather than in their place. And we _have_ to find you a way into melee!"

Keeping up his mumbles, muttering about pretties, swords and overlapping things, Naruto produced one of the many small scrolls he carried on his pouch, always there to record his most recent ideas. It had many scribblings on it, but he opened it a bit further, making space.

"Let's see... How good are you in chakra control? Alright, water-walking's good enough, so we could give you gloves with smaller seals on them that conceal weeapons and changing each one mid-strike, so people wouldn't be able to predict you." Tenten nodded, it made sense and it would be more handy than her regular scroll, at least when it came to close-range combat. "Then we have seals specifically for replacement or movement jutsu... Hmm, how about a technique that makes your weapons gravitate to your hand as you move somewhere near it?" He grinned at her thoughtful look. "On that matter, how about a huge chakram? And I mean big enough for you to fit inside." Now Tenten had a maniacal look in her face, her eyes glinting at the idea. "And rounding it up with an innocent, geisha-like dress, maybe one of those long, bare-legged chinese dresses! They're awesome and would make you look really pretty, not to mention how people would look at the dress rather than the cloud of death you're about to bring!"

"W-well, that'd be correct, but I don't want to come across as a... a _slut_." She grumbled. "Women are not just pretty faces! We can be just as strong as men!"

"Just as strong? No, I don't think so." Naruto replied absent-mindedly, ignoring her hurt look and angry glare. "You're weaker and with lower stamina, that much is genetics." Now Tenten was making to get up, but Naruto still hadn't stopped talking. "But, I guess, that's natural, women are much more flexible than men and possess a greater pain tolerance. Huh, must be balance or something like that."

_'W-what? I... I thought he was underestimating us kunoichi, but can he be this naive?'_ "Naruto, you... You don't look down on kunoichi, at all?"

"Eh, why would I? Sakura-chan used to beat me on the head every time I so much as looked at her wrong. Ayame-nee-chan cooks the best ramen in the world, better than her father and that's almost impossible. Then there's Amiko-chan, she's the kunoichi placed as Sandaime-jii-chan's secretary, but she's an ANBU Commander actually. No, kunoichi are physically weaker than men, but I know they make up in other areas. Chakra control for example; Sakura-chan got the tree-walking excercise in her first try, me and Sasuke had to work on it for a week to get it right."

"O-Oh..." She was quite surprised, not the least of which at finding out that the smiling, young secretary outside the Hokage's office was in fact an ANBU Commander. Go girl power!

"So anyway, that's that, but, what weapon do you prefer to use in close combat?"

"Umm... I'm good with the spear, staff and tonfa? I can also use swords, I prefer them really, but I haven't had much time to-"

"No, no, no!" Naruto interrupted her quickly. "Not which you've trained the most in! The one you're most comfortable in using. Like, when you were still a little girl, and thought of how you'd be fighting ninja, how did you place your body? What did you think you wielded? Your imagination is your greatest weapon! Even if it's never been made before, we can create it! A new weapon, imagine it! One no one else has ever wielded before, marking you as 'unique' even amongst other weapon users!" There was a fire in Naruto's eyes, a contagious willpower that seemed to pass over onto the girl herself.

Tenten quickly found herself standing and thinking back in time, before she had learned how to fight for real, when she had daydreamed about fighting bad guys like the tomboy she was. "Well... I think... It was something like this..." She raised her right hand next to her head, as if holding a thin saber, best for stabbing, her left leg a bit ahead of her right and bent at the knee so only her toes touched the ground. "Yes, my right hand went there and my left... It was something like... this..." Her left hand had come to rest in front of her stomach, almost as if clutching something, more like claws. "Yeah, I remember now!" She began moving, first by slashing with the imaginary sword and then finishing with powerful swipes and thrusts from her clawed hand. "It was exactly like this! I'd flow and then, WHAM!, strike! Parry rather than block, move my entire body like this, bend my waist and just claw right into my enemy!" She was flushed now, not by fatigue but by excitement, like her body was flowing _just as it should_ while she reminisced memories so long forgotten.

Eventually, she stopped, with a sad sigh, and turned to her new friend. She did not expect to see him drawing her own starting pose or any other of the next poses, a couple clones having appeared to fill in the drawing portions.

"Yes, yes! That's it!" He muttered, getting agreements from his clones. "See how she flows here, from each stance to the next? Her entire body moves, not just a single part. She just sort of, flows like wind, or maybe waves of water, and then, just turns it around and charges like a bolt of lightning, no a roaring flame! Oh, look at this, magnificent, see how she goes from gentle dancer to ferocious tiger? It's like she maintains a balance that only she can perceive, each side being completely devoted either to grace or to brutality and switching at any point in time!" Weirder was the fact that the original would stop at the middle of a sentence and a clone would pick up seamlessly, without even stopping, like a three-sided game of ping-pong.

Seeing the three so deep into their mutterings, and enjoying their compliments on her grace very much, thank you, she let them go on for a bit more before finally coughing to stop them. They had managed to fill up more than a few meters of scroll paper, her stances barely taking up one third of it, the rest filled with notes, signs, diagrams, various words that she couldn't really understand what code they were in (seriously, _blue_ was supposed to mean something when over her head?). "Ahem, Naruto-kun, is there something you'd like to share with little, young and sexy, me?" She giggled at his surprised look, almost as if he had lost himself somewhere.

After shaking himself to get out of his creation-happy-land, Naruto focused on the matter at hand, Tenten. "Yes, yes, sorry. I was just thinking of what weapons would best suit your instincts... I've made a few basic diagrams, but I'm not exactly a master of weapons, maybe you have a better idea?" And then he had turned his own scroll over to her, so she could see the drawings.

What stunned Tenten wasn't his ideas; it was how he somehow _knew_ how to expertly draw such obscure weapons, weapons he had never seen before apparently, going only by what he learned from her stance! There, that sword first up, straight, thin, narrow but also extremely sharp, with a crossguard rather than a katana's circle, that's a Tai-chi sword, or Philosopher's sword, a blade meant for quick, precise cuts and stabs. He had even added his opinion that she could use a flashy bit of cloth on the hilt to distract enemies, but that's a regular tassel, or dragon tail as some call them, a known trick of such weapon users! And then there was the assortment of weapons that could be placed on her left arm, all of them some form of bracer or gauntlet. And they were drawn with amazing detail for someone who had never seen one before!

"I'm pretty sure on the sword one, that or a bit longer, heavier, single-edged version could suit you better..." Naruto's voice made Tenten look at him in surprise, that's a basic description of the Dao sword, an easy, finessed weapon that was excellent of full-body cutting. "But the other one confused me a bit... You seem to use the bracer to block and just swipe enemies to attack for the most part, so I thought, something like panther claws? But, you also use many palm attacks, it wouldn't suit that style, just as you use quite a few elbow drives after you fake an attack. So, I turned to gauntlets... They are better, covering all your arm, giving excellent protection and you could place some tricks on them too. I think that a clawed gauntlet suits you best; a small blade at the elbow protector and several others at the end of each finger, they'd leave some pretty nasty wounds." He sat back to watch at the clouds, ignoring Tenten turning from himself to the scroll and back again, mouth slightly agape.

He was right, he was _right_! She was always good with staves and spears, but that came from practicing for hours while moping the house. And swords and claws, she had never heard of anyone using such a combination, so, like a fool, she had discarded it. But she shouldn't, because they _fit_. The sword for parrying and quick slashes, able to maneuvre inside the enemy's space, changing its attacks like a gust of wind, the sharp edge cutting easily and without much strength, only requiring she uses her great dexterity rather than a strength she would never have. The claw, charging up her entire body for full-strength tackles channeled into five small blades, moving quickly to deflect and block attacks with the metal plates, the elbow blade enabling her to turn even a miss into a sneaky blow...

"N-Naruto... This... this is perfect, thank you!" She tossed the scroll to the side and gave him a tight hug, causing him to splutter and blush. "I'll get on to a weaponsmith I know, he'll be able to make me at least a couple of prototypes quickly, and if it works, it's going to be awesome! My own style, Blade and Claw! Haha, imagine that, Tenten, weapons mistress!"

She would have happily stayed there, and Naruto wouldn't have removed her off him, oh no he wouldn't, but someone chose just _that_ moment to show up. A black suit wearing someone, with a stylized cat mask on her face. "Gennin Uzumaki. This is a command under Hokage-sama. Your teacher has been sighted at the onsen side. You are to meet him there. Immidiately." The last word was delivered with a distasteful look at the now-blushing Tenten as she realized she had just glomped her fellow gennin. "Ready yourself. I shall transport you in the assigned location."

"Aww, why so harsh, Koneko-chan?" Naruto giggled (in a manly, if insane, way). "Did your fiancee forget to get you flowers? You could adopt one of my pretties, if you wanted!" Then his face was only a centimeter away from the backpedaling girl, a greepy grin on his face. "They _like_ hugs. They like hugs a lot. You will hug them, won't you, Koneko-chan. Because you mustn't anger my pretties, they throw _veeery_ nasty tantrums!" Turning his head to his new friend, he winked to show her it was a game and let the thoroughly creeped out ANBU take him away in the whirlwind-like transportation that is the Shunshin no Jutsu.

Heh, he thought as he watched the ANBU slightly sweat under just a hint of his crazies, they don't make ANBU like they used to. Maybe he shoud look around for Kuma-chan, the Hokage's secretary, ask her if her dear ANBU needed some emotional hardening. Oh, nothing like a few good Naru-pranks to make the ANBU stop being frightened, ever again! Though, he had to admit, creating the kind of prank-chains he did, using a prank to relieve the previous one's side effects but only to give new, even worse ones, could probably be classified as torture techniques.

Hmm, torturing, maybe he could visit that cool Scarhead-kun, he'd know where to find Anko-chan, she looked like a good accomplice for some pranks!

The completely insane look in his face and his mutters about 'paint', 'tar and feathers' and 'Anko-chan' (especially that last one) were enough for people to give him a wide berth; one about as long as half the village, if they could!

"Now, if I were a powerful, cool, shinobi master, on the way to meeting my new, bright, prodigy of a student, where would I be?" He asked himself ashe wandered around aimlessly. His eyes fell on a white-haired man with extravagant clothes in red and green, painting an even bigger target than his own orange ensemble, if that was even possible. "Well, I wouldn't be _that _guy. I mean, look at that old geezer, he's probably a looser."

That was when Naruto realized just where the so-called 'looser' was looking at, or rather, which wall he was looking _through_!

The women's baths! That man was a pervert!

Now, Naruto had very few things against perverts, he was one too if one considered his many uses of his Oiroke no Jutsu. But that guy, he was so old it was like pedophilia if the women on the other side were younger than thirty! When he heard Sakura-chan's unmistakeable voice, Naruto saw red. He might not be crushing on her any more, but he _did_ find her very pretty still and, even more, she was his team-mate! He couldn't allow some no-name pathetic looser disgrace her like that! "Hey, you! Yeah, you, the white-haired pervert! Stop perving at Sakura-chan, you letch!" He yelled, pointing at the man, who turned around quite annoyed-looking and revealing the large metal headband on his forehead, with the kanji for 'Oil' on it.

"Oi, oi, gaki," The man grumbled, trieing to placate the blonde so the girls wouldn't run away. Too late; their screams and sounds of rushing bodies indicated that they had vacated the premises. "Now look what you've done! You ruined my research!"

"Research my _ass_, you're just a perv! What are you, a virgin, peeping on teenaged girls? You're like fifty, you damn pedophile! Shame on you, shaaame!"

"Hey, I'm no normal pervert! I'm a SUPER pervert!" He grinned proudly at the face-palm Naruto went through. "And I'm no pedophile, that's Orochimaru's domain. I prefer a more... mature woman."

"A mature woman to you would be my damn grandomother, and she's dead! Didn't your mother teach you manners?"

"Psh, the old witch should be happy her son gets some. Anyway, say kid, what's your name?"

"What's it to ya, looking to peep on young boys too?" Naruto snarked with a smirk but turned serious. "Name's Naruto Uzumaki and don't you forget it-tebbayo. You?"

"I am the man who tames the North! The hero to walk the South! Lover of women both East and West! I am the Toad Sage of Myobokuzan, Jiraiya-sama!" The man seemed to launch himself into an improptu Kabuki dance.

"Aha. Right, and I'm a pureblood Uzumaki. And you're also a looser." Naruto replied coldly, making Jiraiya fall on his face at the sheer lack of reaction. "Anyway, say, have you seen a ninja walk around here? Got told that my teacher forgot to come to the Training Grounds he told me to and now I had to come all the way here. Gee, what a looser."

"Hm, oh that, I'm your supposed teacher." Jiraiya replied nonchalantly, rejoicing at the surprised look. "But since you ruined my research, I don't think I'll be teaching you much. Damn brat!"

"You're my teacher? Right, as if I'd believe that." Naruto scoffed dismissively. "You're probably some look-alike that goes around perving and annoying people, dumping it on the poor man. Last time I heard, the _real_ Toad Sage was a strong shinobi, you look weaker than jii-chan, and he's _ancient_-tebbayo." So, convinced this man wasn't his teacher, Naruto turned around to leave.

"Kakashi sent you to me. You have a seal on your navel." The man said, suddenly serious. "And I _am_ the Toad Sage." Then a large hand was on Naruto's shoulder and the two were flying. Not shunshin; the man had leaped, but that leap alone was more like flight.

Of course, Naruto screamed bloody murder. "HEY! LEMME GO YOU PERV! HELP! HELP! A PEDOPHILE'S KIDNAPPING ME! HEEELP!" But despite his struggling, Naruto couldn't break free, or even disrupt the flight and that was saying something.

When they landed, Jiraiya tossed the boy forward, making him roll. "Hah! That'll teach ya to call me a pedophile! Besides, why would I care for that Sakura girl when there were beauties like Anko and Kurenai in that bath?"

For just a bit, their expressions were identical, both blushing and their noses bleeding as they imagined aforementioned girls wearing nothing and posing sexily for their enjoyment.

But Naruto was not so easily swayed (or maybe he was hardened against such attacks thanks to his pretties). Shaking his head, he cleared his mind of the images and refocused on the matter at hand. "Whatever, that just proves you're a pervert and a looser. I'm outta here, now I have to walk all the way back to the onsen, dammit, annoying useless old men..." He grumbled, hands in his pockets and pouting.

At least until a large frog, no _toad_ he identified it, landed in front of him. "Rrribit." It croaked at him. It was an obvious summon, wearing clothes and even a knife on it. "Iiii'm Gamanosuke. Rrrribit."

"Still don't believe when I say I'm the Toad Sage? Or do you think someone could have stolen the Toad Contract without me ripping them a new one?"

"Well, what do you want from me? Congratulations or something? Besides, your style's too old, I mean, seriously, kabuki-paint? Did the local circus loose you somewhere? Then, green and red, _green and red_? Are you freakin' serious, old man? You need _style_ and _class_ to wear green and red, they clash, didn't anybody teach you that? I mean, I wear orange and blue, praise be to the Orange, not orange and _green_, can you imagine that? Now, lemme go, I need to find my teacher, if he hasn't left the place already, dammit!" Naruto mouthed off to the Sannin with pure obstinance.

Momentarily stunned by the blonde's rant, and lost in recollection on how similar it was to another Uzumaki's ranks, Jiraiya tried to calm down. "So why don't_ I_ teach you? As... reparations for loosing your original teacher. I doubt there's many things a random jounin would teach you over me."

"Ugh, fine. Do you even know what I can do? Let's see, I need some help with fuuinjutsu, sounds really awesome, but I can't find many good books. Sure, I've memorized quite a few, but they don't explain anything! How can I make my own seals if I don't understand how they work? Not even my pretties have found anything!"

"Hah! Then you came to the right man, boy! I am Konoha's greatest seal master!" Jiraiya boasted, getting a ribbit from the still lingering frog. "I could teach you whatever you want to know, but you'd have to bring me..."

"A shrubbery?" Naruto's eyes glinted.

"Yeah, a shrubbery- what no!" Jiraiya tried to refute. "Not a shrubbery! What am I going to do with a shrubbery?"

"Dunno, what _is_ a shrubbery anyway? But, since you asked, I'll get you one!" And Naruto was off, leaving a gaping, stunned and quite disturbed man behind.

Moments later, the same man was looking down at, yes, you guessed it, a shrubbery; a small square-shaped shrub. "I am sure I want to know but... how on earth did you manage to get a shrubbery... _already planted_?"

"Hm? Oh, my pretties helped me! They're so pretty and nice! I just _love_ them!"

"Your... Your pretties? What 'pretties'?"

"You know, my pretties! They're awesome! They're the only ones who like me! They like to hug and cuddle and dance and they _really_ like me! They're the best! As good as Sandaime-jii-chan!" Naruto, in his traditional overacting way, spoke of his dear 'pretties', arms gesturing widely and eyes alight.

"But... who _are_ they?"

"My pretties are what they are; my pretties! You can find them at my warehouse, well, usually anyway. Sometimes they take walks, but I keep trying to tell them to stay there or people will be frightened. Just the nature of you humans; always frightened with what you can't understand and control."

"We... humans?" Jiraiya muttered. Then, he decided he would bring it up to the old man. Maybe the villagers went too far and broke the boy? He had seemed pretty normal at first but... "So... anyway... As your teacher, I'm offering you a unique, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!" He quickly made handseals and slapped his hand down, creating a puff of smoke to reveal himself standing on a large toad with a scroll on its chest. A scroll it put on the ground and let unfurl, coming to end at a blank square, almost as if to write something there. Other squares had names on them. The previous one read 'Namikaze Minato'. "You have the rare honor to... Sign the summoning contract for the Toads!"

"No, thanks." The deadpan voice made even the toad stumble, but thanks to having four legs avoided the fate of its summoner, namely meeting the cold, hard earth.

"What? Why not!"

"Because toads are _boring_. I mean, you just hop around and croak, ribbit, ribbit, big deal!"

"Big deal? _Big deal_? Are you an idiot? The Toad summons are one of the top three summons in the world!"

"Psh, semantics!" Naruto waved him off. "Besides, I prefer frogs, not toads."

"You little brat! I offer you the BEST summoning contract in the world and _this_ is what you say? I have half a mind to feed you to 'Bunta!" Jiraiya yelled, at the same time as his summon.

"Ribbit, what, ribbit?" The toad spoke up. "We, Toads, are vastly superior to frogs! We are amphibian, ribbit!"

"Amphibian my orange-and-ramen-garbed butt, you die in salt water! Besides, I'm a _Konoha_ ninja, smack-down in the middle of a _forest_ country! What need would I have of amphibians? No, frogs are better; poisonous skin, natural climbers, just as good jumpers. To me, Toads are useless."

"B-b-but... But..."

"Buttsex?" There was a twinkle in his blue eyes.

"Yes, wait, NO!" Jiraiya sputtered, the blonde had gotten him, again. "But, the last signer is Namikaze Minato! The Fourth Hokage! Surely you'd want to be like him!" He pleaded with the boy, guessing that he would want to be like the idol, just like every other boy would.

He guessed wrong. "What? Why would I want to do _that_ for? Not like I'm his long lost son, given a different name to protect me from his enemies, or something, now am I?"

Jiraiya felt his breath hitch in his chest and his heart stop beating for several moments as he realized that Naruto thought it was simply impossible. He really _did_ think about murdering Sarutobi for a bit there.

"Besides, I don't like the man." Naruto glared at the name written on the scroll. "He's a hero, I won't deny that, and he saved everyone... But... He did something worse than killing to me. He took it from me, my _humanity_, my chance to be _normal_, whatever sense of family I might have ever had." Then he shrugged, as if he didn't care much about it any more. "If not for him, I might have had a chance at being adopted, that would have been awesome, I guess, but then I wouldn't have had my pretties. Speaking of which, I _really_ need to go back to them. They get lonely when I'm gone for too long."

"But... the summoning contract... It... You have to sign it! You _have _to!"

"Have to? Have to? I _have_ to do _nothing_! Nothing! Zero, zip, nil! NIHILISM IS THE END! IT'S COMING! THE ENDLESS ABYSS! REPENT! REPEEENT I SAY! TURN YOUR VOICES TO THE DIVINE TRINITY, THE ORANGE, THE RAMEN AND THE LOG! REPEEEENT!" Going from a normal boy to a screaming demagogue made Jiraiya take quite a few steps back at the boy's flaming eyes when, suddenly, he was all too calm again. "Yeah, what were we talking about again? Oh, right, I gotta go soon, so, do you have anything _else_ to teach me? Something that's _not_ useless? Like fuuinjutsu, since you say you're so good at it?"

"Oh... err... Yeah, I... I guess I can... Why so focused on it anyway?" Still trying to get the conversation back on track, Jiraiya tried to go slow rather than his usual approach of kicking the door down.

"Well, because it's awesome! It can make exposions! I could make many, many explosions! Like, clones that throw kunai with explosive tags on them! That would be AWESOME-DATTEBAYO!" The boy seemed to drool as it imagined explosions of all kinds and sizes and colors erupting. Jiraiya shivered. "Then, there's also my leaves, maybe I could use seals to carry many of them, it's kind of wasteful to make a seal for a single leaf, if there's one that can hold a dozen or a hundred, it would be _really_ cool, but there's nothing like that in the texts, damn it!" Then he turned pensive. "Now that I think about it, that other pedophile, Orochimaru, or at least one of his right-hand men anyway, did something to me... Messed my chakra up real good. It's still wonky and regenerates so slowly, it's like it's blocked somehow."

Now _that_ picked Jiraiya's interest, and it was something that he couldn't get from the old man anyway. So, lifting an eyebrow, he asked the boy to show him. And show him he did, much to the amazement of the shinobi burried somewhere _very_ deep inside the pervert that was Jiraiya. There was the Kyuubi-holding seal, still as perfect as the day it was formed. But there was also something over it; another seal, placed recently, made with chakra rather than ink, heh, hasty job. Well, hasty, but well made and it fulfilled its purpose. But, it was easy enough to deal with. He gathered his chakra and grinned maliciously.

Seconds later, he was laughing at Naruto's rather inventive expletives (really, he would think that it would be impossible to do all these things, but it didn't deter the boy). "Hah! Serves ya right, brat! At least I removed it, good job holding down the fox by the way, seems you took good care of the seal, you called on its power maybe once?"

"Twice, but really close together, I think the second one was the fox's own volition though." He panted as he got up, but he could feel the change, even without using chakra. It was back, his power was _back_. He laughed.

Jiraiya looked at the boy as he laughed when his finely-tuned senses told him of a rising chakra. A chakra that seemed to seep outwards and meld with the wind and, more astoundingly, the plants around him, going into the leaves and tearing them off, swirling them like a tornado around the laughing blonde...

_'T-that boy, does he have the Mokuton? B-But, Uzumaki never showed such a skill, they're only supposed to have longevity, vitality and chakra potency! Sure, they all had a green thumb, I still remember Kushina-chan's gardens, but... but this is unheard of! How can he use the Mokuton? Wait, no, that's no Mokuton! That's... he's melding it? Filling it? He's _imbuing_ them with his own chakra, but the Kyuubi's toxicity should... no, he screens that, he has that kind of control? And... and... how can he move so many leaves, anyway? Each leaf possesses its own storage of nature chakra, very small individually, but he's moving a hundred of them without problem, _while_ suppressing the nature chakra?'_

Finally, the wind died down and the leaves fluttered back to the ground, as if nothing had happened. Only Naruto seemed revitalized, even with a chakra expenditure that would have knocked out many chuunin. Truth be told, the sole imperfection of Konohagakure, and the reason he still lacked that damn seal to cut down the chakra cost, was simply the Nature chakra inside each leaf. All this time, he had been fighting against the leaf's nature because he didn't know, nor could even perceive, the presence of that chakra, so different from his own. It was that exact reason why Naruto still couldn't perfect his core technique. Admittedly, Jiraiya was somewhat hesitant of teaching him.

"Alright old man, you've proven yourself to me! So, I've decided! I'm giving you the honor of being my teacher!"

"What? You give _me_ the honor? Ungrateful brat! I'm the one who asked you to be my student!"

Naruto just shoved out a tongue at the older man. "Yeah, you asked me to be your student, that means you needed _my_ help, so _I_'m actually superior! Haha!"

Jiraiya just _had_ to laugh at that. It was just so funny, looking at the boy's exaggerated arrogant stance, as if he now commanded the world. "You're alright, kid. You're alright. Now, let's get down to business, fuuinjutsu takes up a lot of time, learning diagrams and stuff's the quick part, the rest will take a long time to put to practical use."

"Before we start, can you answer me a question?" After getting the 'Sure' from the old man, Naruto continued. "How _did_ we get our Summoning Contracts? I mean, this one looks kind of new, definintely after the Sage of the Six Paths, if he even existed. And it's not like gods came down and handed them out or something, nor were they just 'born' somehow. They're all made, right? So, how _does_ one make something like that?"

"Why interested in getting your own? The good ones have already been taken boy, you may find some really weak or unwanted ones, but I doubt you'd find one free."

"Yeah, but what if I wanted to make one from scratch? One that links to here, in Konoha, not some other plane. That's what I want to know."

"Hm... well, that would be easier, theoretically, and cost less chakra too. Summoning scrolls have been in use for quite some time, but they'd need a great deal of alteration to change them from summoning a single person to a wider selection based on genetics and stuff like that. It would take a lot of work, hell, I'd need a couple of years at least to get one done. Why, what's on your mind?"

"Eh... nothing, forget I asked."

"Now, now, brat, I can't do that, not after you awaken my curiocity!" Jiraiya gave him an encouraging grin.

Naruto looked abashed, but continued. "I... I just want to be near my pretties, always, all the time! And... well, they _want_ to help me, but people don't understand them, see? 'Cause they're different, they're not humans so... So I just want to be able to call them over when I want to have an extra hug or to go to them when they need me so I can take care of them... I can't leave them alone, I just can't! They'd _die_ without me!"

"Well, yes, I see. No worries kiddo, I won't talk to anyone about your pretties, except maybe the old man Hokage. Now, sit down, shut up and focus, we're gonna start with that multi-seal you wanted to learn. It's a bit complicated, so you need to pay attention and not mess it up, at all. Alright? Now watch..."

It was several hours (and a quick Shadow Clone to fetch them ramen) later that Naruto was finally wiped out enough for Jiraiya to leave him and go interrogate the Hokage. There were many questions, besides the kid thinking it impossible that the Uzumaki were his real clan or that line about being the long-lost son of the Yondaime. Then there were these 'pretties' whatever they were. He'd have to find out everything he could, he had given a promise after all!

To say that the Hokage was worried about the boy was an understatement. Massive chakra expenditures into plants that even herbal specialists couldn't recognize. Talks about being a pureblood Uzumaki or the son of the Yondaime. Could it be that the boy had such great insight or were they flukes? Had Naruto found out the truth of his heritage, or was it just a joke? The old man shuddered to think that Naruto could have played them all for fools. Considering how insane he acter some times, it was a scary prospect.

In the end, Naruto took well to seals, or as well as any boy is expected too, but that was more due to him having already memorized a hundred of them, rather than any true understanding of the art.

The next day, Naruto met Tenten first, after all, why go after the pervert, he was late first! Time to show him how it feels! Him and Kakashi, but he wouldn't dare be late to Kakashi, the man was scary when serious, who knew what he'd have them do next time?

The bun-haired girl was there already by the time Naruto got to their meeting, a sword much like the one he had drawn for her in her hand as she practiced.

Now, Naruto was no pervert, nor did he have powerful hormones, but there's something seriously attractive at a slender woman wielding dangerous weapons.

Not far from there, Jiraiya was feeling proud at the boy; as if soon, another would be converted to the Icha-Icha!

As soon as she felt Naruto's presence, which was a surprisingly long time for a ninja thanks to her focus, Tenten quickly stopped and jogged to him, waving. Pleasantries were exchanged, but quickly she steered the conversation to a big leather pouch he was holding. "So what's this anyway? Never seen you holding something like this before."

Naruto grinned and he opened it to show a largish fruit inside. It was quite curious; it was oval-shaped like an egg, but was transparent. Most of its insides looked like liquid, and there was no fleshy part to it, only a large seed pod at the center of it. "This? Oh, this is something I made, sometime ago! It's one of my pretties, really, but from a long time ago! See this fruit? It's been grown with great quantities of chakra being seeped into it daily. But, the great part about it is, that it's filled not with 'just chakra', but elemental chakra! Elemental chakra, split and divided amongst the five elements, held in perfect balance! So here's what I thought; why don't we mess with that balance?"

"And turn it unbalanced? Kind of like _you_ are?" She teased, getting a grin in return. She was catching on quickly!

"Nah, I'm worse; I change balances every time I wiggle my big toe. No, I was thinking, this plant is _really_ sensitive to chakra, you could probably channel some inside and, I dunno, guess we'll see!" At her question on what he was expecting to see, he grinned wider. "It's already imbued with chakra held in a very delicate balance. All it takes is a bit of a nudge to mess with it, I'm guessing we'll find out what elemental type you are by whatever side effects come off! And no, I have _no_ idea what those side effects might be! Isn't it _exciting_?"

Tenten could only giggle at the blonde's antics. She decided to trust him so, taking the little weird fruit on her hand, she channeled her chakra into it.

The results began immidiately, but she let if flow a few more seconds to confirm it. 'It' started with some bubbles appearing inside, multiplying quickly until it frothed, the little black-green seed in the center began to glow red until finally... The thin membrane ruptured and scalding fluid fell to the ground, the rest of the fruit shrivelling up as if burned. At least she was quick in dropping it, avoiding getting burned.

"Well, I guess that's that. You caused the fire element inside it to overload until it boiled." Naruto appraised in an almost scientific mode. "At least, that's what I think, but I think I'm right. Now, this plant's really sensitive, it picked up the residual heat in your chakra, the _potential_ to easily turn to fire, but that doesn't mean you can start lobbing fire jutsu. Nor should you really, we need to find you a different way to use it."

Using the happiness at finding out what element she was attuned to, Tenten happily babbled with Naruto, trying to find new and inventive uses of fire-chakra and fire-mimicking chakra. Admittedly, most of it was augmenting her weapons, which wasn't really all that efficient considering that she lacked chakra-conductive weaponry to use. In return, she trained with him, using rapid-fired senbon to count as Neji's taijutsu attacks. It wasn't perfect, but it was good dodge training (and she secretly loved the way his body contorted -she wasn't crushing on him, but she _did_ enjoy a good show, so sue her!).

As he would train at mornings with Tenten, helping her find her own style, afternoons were devoted to Jiraiya. The old pervert often tried to gauge the boy, but never really could.

Case in point this.

"So you're saying you defeated Sarutobi Hiruzen, the Sandaime Hokage, the freakin' God Of Shinobi... with ONE freaking jutsu? I'd like to see _that_ brat!" Jiraiya stood disbelieving, not that anyone could blame him. It _was_ a ludicrus claim, and he had yet to calm down after the damn brat refused the Summoning Contract!

"Yeah, I did, what of it? I could _so_ kick _your_ ass with it too! Damn ero-sennin!" Naruto was indignat in his reply, dropping the calligraphy kit Jiraiya had forced him to use in favor of pouting (in a manly way!) with his arms crossed.

Naturally, the claim and image were so completely ridiculous that Jiraiya busted his ass off laughing. It didn't matter what Naruto said or tried to do, Jiraiya was still rolling on the floor laughing.

So, deciding to shut him up for good, he used the one jutsu he hadn't used since graduation. "**Oiroke no Jutsu** **(Sexy Jutsu)**" Of course, that was delivered in a low, sultry, _feminine_ voice and finalized with a long, drawn out 'aaahn', just to top off the effect.

Now, most men, at seeing a statuesque blonde teen with perfect curves and only a bit of smoke tantalizingly hiding her most secret and forbidden areas... they would all erupt into a nosebleed, which would lead to an anemic-derived coma.

But Jiraiya isn't like _most men_, he's not just a pervert, he's a SUPER PERVERT! As he himself would loudly proclaim, of course. So, instead of fainting like a coward, he quickly hoped back onto his feet, panting steam and his arms groping as he approached the transformed boy. "Ahahaha... very good, yes, veeeery good Naruto... Now just stay there for a bit, I need to confirm you have all the... anatomical parts transformed right... ahahaha"

Inwardly cringing at the approaching letch (and the female hormones he had taken up at the moment) he pushed it all down and instead made his (her?) favourite handseal. Clones appeared all around the pervert, blonde women, redheads, brunettes, a hundred breath-taking teens appeared all around him, their curvaceous bodies taking up all his eyesight, their low, sultry voices echoing in his ears, their smiles calling to him-

THUMP!

Naruto dispelled his Harem no Jutsu, now upgraded to take on the form of his pretties, and grinned down. "I told you, but did you listen to me? Nooo, now you get to pay, ero-sennin!" And he promptly doodled on the Sannin's face before happily skipping off to find some poor soul (read; Hyuuga sans Hinata) to torment.

Meanwhile, Sasuke was not as happy or jovial, he was too focused in wrestling his own demons, now coming to life.

"So what's eating you, Sasuke? Tired already?" Kakashi mocked after kicking his ass, once again. Of course, the boy was quite well aware that he was improving rapidly, as evident by the fact that it took Kakashi more than two seconds to pin him to the ground. It still hurt his pride, but Kakashi _was_ a legendary ninja, with a Sharingan too.

"No." His reply was curt and cold, as he got up. He just didn't seem capable of... _bothering_... to feel much these days. "Just thinking."

"Oh? What about? A girl? Nah, you don't have to tell me, if you don't want to. Sometimes, it's good to just sit down and think, just relax and let your thoughts wander. But, remember Sasuke, me, Naruto, even Sakura, all of Team Seven is here with you and for you."

The boy seemed think about it for a while and gave him a forced smile before turning grim once again. "Kakashi... have you ever... lost someone?"

Kakashi seemed to hunch foward before sitting down, looking older than he used to. Even his ever-spiky hair seemed to droop a bit. "Up until a few months ago? Only everyone who ever mattered to me." He ignored Sasuke's surprised look and drilled his lone visible eye into Sasuke's own. "This Sharingan of mine, it was given to me by my best friend, who died because I was too stupid and arrogant. It was placed there by my other team-mate, a bright girl that was to me what Sakura is to you. She died a few weeks later, saving my life, ruining the oath I had given to Obito to protect her. My sensei, the only person to care for me after my father performed seppuku, was killed at the Kyuubi's rampage." Then he grinned and ruffled Sasuke's hair, just like he knew the boy hated it. "So, yeah, I've lost many people. But now I've gained two new important people in my life, you and Naruto."

"Hn..." But he was more sceptical this time than before, still looking out to the setting sun.

Elsewhere, Naruto was poking at his teacher. "Come on already, ero-sennin! What's taking you so long in peeping girls? I need to train! Train! Train! Train! Train! Train! Train! Train! Traaaaaiiiiinnn!"

"Oh, shut up you little brat! Can't you read the emotion?" The older man snapped back at his student. Really, was it too much to ask for a few hours of quiet peeping? Was it too much?

Apparently, when one has a hyperactive, ADHD-afflicted, bat-shit crazy student, yes. Yes, it is.

"Emotion?" Naruto's innocent, crazies-filled voice made Jiraiya cringe. "E..mooooow-tion! E-motion! E in the motion? Or motion in the e? Is it an e-motion? A motion in a yet-undiscovered counter-anacrhonism we should have no idea about? Does the 'emotion' have motion? Much less in the e? Is it-"

"SHUT UP!" Ten minutes of insane rambling make Jiraiya easily pissed off. "Just shut the freakin' hell up already!"

"NAY!" Came the shouted reply. "I SHALL NOT BE SILENCED, KNAVE! I SPEAK THE WORDS OF THE TRIAD, THE LOG, THE RAMEN AND THE ORANGE! YOU CANNOT SILENCE ME! YOU CANNOT SILENCE MEEE!"

Naruto was in fact quite promptly silenced when Jiraiya who bonked him on the head. Really, that brat was making all the babes run away. "Shut up already!"

"Then _train_ me already!"

"You brat!"

"You lecher!"

"Damn hippy!"

"Damn _proud_ of it, you geriatric, menopaused pervert!" Naruto yelled back, somehow having dressed himself in extremely loose clothes with flower patterns. The long stem of a mushroom was on his hand and he bonked the Sannin with it. Weird, there was a bite-shaped part missing on it. "Now back off! I shall chew this mushroom and become twice as large! Then I shall proceed to stomp on your back until you pop away! It'sa me! Naruto!"

Yes, some days, Jiraiya did _indeed_ wonder what gods he had pissed off lately.

With Tenten on the other hand, the blonde was much more controlled. The girl had helped him greatly in manual dexterity in return for his ideas and Kage Bunshin training.

But really, the girl was having a lot of trouble keeping a clear head especially when she realized how flexible _all_ of his body parts were and how many Kage Bunshins he could make. Poor Naruto almost thought she was sick by how red her face would get or the way her eyes seemed to sort of glaze over with something he didn't quite recognize (but felt he should) while a little bit of drool escaped her lips. She would quickly recover and deny anything however, so he left it all alone.

In a short while, just over three weeks really, the girl had become the darling of the local crazed-inventor weaponsmith, a man named Tetsuhi Ryoga, who apparently had nothing better to do than try out all the insane weapon designs Naruto had come up with. His favourites included a giant chakram, wide enough for the user to stand in it comfortably, and a new form of blades that Naruto called 'sakabaken' or 'reverse blades'. They had a long, double edged, triangular blade on a curved hilt, meant to be wielded in reverse grip, with the hilt curving away from the body. Tenten wasn't exactly skilled in their use yet, but she did love how unconventional they were. At the moment, she and Naruto were working on a three-pronged fuuma shuriken that would be placed on the back of the hand, hopefully with a small mechanism to cause it to spin and a catch-release to throw it at range.

So now they were discussing dress code.

"I'm _telling _you Naruto! Wear the damn _**clothes**_!" Tenten roared in a way that would have reminded many of the Kyuubi.

Of course, Naruto wasn't smart enough to cring, cry 'meep' and do whatever the angry girl in front of him wanted -or he was just _that_ clueless about girls. "But I'm telling you Ten-chan! I like orange! This has no orange! I can't betray the Orange! What will the Log and the Ramen say?"

Tenten tried to ignore the headache, and the staring from every single customer in the shop. "But it looks better on you! It's more functional! Wear orange when _off_ duty!"

"Nay! I shall not hide my allegiance to the Orange, for it is awesome!"

As much as she liked her friend's eccentricity (or insanity, depending on the point of view), Tenten was growing more and more exasperated by the minute. They didn't even have all that long left to debate his outfit, they had to inscribe the seals today as they would need a few days to acclimate themselves to his chakra and a couple more to learn how not to mix them up.

It was a few hours later (and several comments from many women who threatened to cut him apart if he wore that much orange again) that Naruto left, but he made everyone cringe by wondering if he could get someone to pain seals on the outside of his clothing to change its colors, keeping the same motif of course. A few scrupulous merchants immidiately scurried off to secure as many sunglasses as possible; they were going to become very sought-after goods.

So, there stood Naruto, looking at his future ninja clothes. It started with black leather boots, lined with a few tricks, such as hidden blades and lockpicks, with very soft soles to make as little noice as possible. He had forest-camouflage colored pants that widened out a lot at his calves, where he would store a few hundred leaves in special seals made by Jiraiya. Over that, he wore a light brown, almost beige, colored shirt with darker and lighter tribal spiral and forest markings that seemed to move as he did. The shirt was in fact much thicker than it looked, being made to be worn over light body armor that would protect his more vulnerable areas. He placed a jacket with long, wide sleeves over it, again in forest-camouflage colors, it too lined with storage seals, and a dark orange colored bandana on his arms, just under his shoulder, with a spiral mark on them. He even changed his headband's cloth, choosing a brown-colored one with green and orange geometric shapes.

All of this ensemble would receive seals to change the colors to yellow, orange and red on command for when the blonde was off duty (or, as Jiraiya and Tenten believed, when he just wanted to eye-rape someone).

While Tenten was working on the appropriate seals, Naruto was more concerned with his ninja pouch. Thanks to the successful polination and rapid growth of his pretties, he now would have to carry a lot more items than normal, so he had to adapt. Gone was the blue thigh-holster and common ninja pouch. Instead, he acquired a larger, wider one that would be placed on his orange-studded, black belt right under the small of his back, complete with hooks to place a small weapon over it. In the new pouch he placed classic shuriken and kunai but also explosive tags, smoke pellets (spiked with pepper), ninja wire, a few scrolls with a pocket calligraphy kit and a few vials with plant-based poisons, just in case. Over the pouch, he placed a pair of collapsible fuuma shuriken, complements of Tenten, to go with his new Weapon Shadow Clone, who knew when a moving wall of sharp steel would come in useful?

As for the seals Tenten was writing, he had already gathered the leaves. He decided that apart from the general (generic even) leaves found in most forests, he would give a try to pine needles and similarly different types to see what changes they would bring. Some would be faster but others might be tougher to break. Naruto was even working on a tree that would produce fire-resistant leaves and another with leaves lined with natural plant oil to the point they would burst into flames.

The pair was so devoted into their pursuits (Naruto having to make several restarts to get out his scrolls to write a few ideas or silly rhymes -though they were possibly one and the same to him) that they lost account of time, making Jiraiya come to them once he realized he hadn't heard the annoying comments of his disciple for so long. Tenten was initially extremely excited to meet a friend of her idol, but quickly turned sour once she realized that Naruto wasn't lieing when he called the man 'ero-sennin'.

She _did_ wonder though if the man really knew how to please women and, if he did, how she could get him to teach that to Naruto. For a runt, he showed great signs of developing into a hunk in a few years. Best call dibs from now, rather than wait for some hussy to get the benefits of her hard work.

On the last night before the third part began, Naruto entered his meditation chamber. It had a small pool filled with ramen, orange-colored walls and a large log in the middle. There, he prayed to the Log, beheld the Orange and ate enough Ramen to give salt poisoning to an army. When he was done, he went to sleep, wondering if he could get Teuchi to make orange-flavored log ramen, or was it log-flavored orange ramen?

At least the Sandaime had accepted his gift that day...

_~Flashback~_

_"Naruto-kun!" The aged leader of Konohagakure called from outside the boy's grove. He knew he had permission to enter, but last time he did without the blonde with him, he had gotten treesap all over him and tripped on roots he could have _sworn_ weren't there. Heck, even then he could feel someone watching him, observing his every movement, like a large predator, only lacking the killer intent. "Naruto-kun! Come out!"_

_Mere moments later, a dirt-covered but excited Naruto came out. After a full-speed tackle-glomp. "Jii-chan! Hi Jii-chan! How are you Jii-chan! Why did your waist make a cracking sound, Jii-chan?" He babbled, eyes twinkling._

_Getting of the ground, grumbling about his clothes having been just cleaned, the 'jii-chan' smiled at the boy. He was always so energetic, though he used to be much less insane. But, he pressed on. "Naruto-kun, remember when Inoichi-san had come here with a clone of yours to help take care of your pretties?" The boy nodded so fast that the Sandaime only saw a blur and wondered if his head would fall off at some point. "He said that you channeled a lot of chakra into a tree, could you show me the tree? I'm really curious."_

_A few seconds later, the old man was still having trouble re-orienting himself as the boy had grabbed him by the hand and pulled him inside the grove, moving fast enough that he was almost horizontal. Keeping his hat on with an arm, Sarutobi wondered if it had been a bad idea to give the boy sugar when he was younger._

_Several moments later, and Sarutobi would have sworn he had seen some trees wave at him as he passed them, but he must still be disoriented he reminded himself, they entered the center of the grove, or at least he thought it was._

_Well, he was no plant expert, but he had been a student of the Shodai... and he had never seen trees like that. Some were small, others were large, so large they must be at least as old as him, but they were all so different, with garish colors or weird patterns on their barks. Naruto pulled him to a specific one however. It was... impressive._

_Almost ten feet it stood, with bark that looked like several smaller joined together, even small lines of bright green going up in a way that reminded of the man of some drawings of chakra circulation systems as drawn by Hyuuga. It had many branches and many fruits on them, large, transparent, violet in color, like a grape, but with a spark inside, like something he was familiar with but couldn't ident..ify.._

_"Ch-chakra? Naruto-kun, this tree... where did you get it?" He asked, voice full of surprise._

_"Oh, I grew it myself! Was pretty hard to get the right combination of breeding, but I made it! Isn't she _great_?" The blonde gushed as he ran a hand over the bark. "I grew her specifically for this, her fruit." He picked a ripe one and gave it to the old man._

_Sarutobi smelled at the fruit and it smelled alright, if a bit unique. He poked at it and saw that the flesh of the fruit, while transparent, wasn't in fact water or even remotely fluid. With a look at a beaming Naruto, he brought it to his mouth and tried to have a bite, not that it was large enough to last for more than a couple._

_Naruto's hand lashed out quickly and took it away, his face worried as he yelled at the old man. "No! Bad jii-chan! Don't eat it!" He quickly took out a small woven bag and placed it inside before handing it back. "I infused a _lot_ of my chakra into it, each fruit has about as much chakra as I do when I'm full." The old man's eyes bugged out as he looked back at it with a great deal more respect than commonly afforded to fruit. "The tree takes my chakra and filters it through the bark, then stores it into her fruit. It's done in a way to make chakra... edible."_

_"E-edible? But chakra's... chakra is an energy, it can't be edible!"_

_"Why? Because no one managed it before? Bah-ttebayo! I did it, so there! Chakra is stored inside the fruit in a way to make it compatible with whomever eats it!" He looked very proud, and with good reason the Sandaime surmised. Then he looked downcast. "But it's imperfect and I can't fix it. It doesn't release the chakra slowly, it kind of spills it all over inside." He winced remembering the pain of having his chakra system almost torn apart. "It's good and it works, but you must have your chakra almost run out before eating it, or it hurts like hell. Well, hurts _me_ like hell, so I dunno what it does to others. I mean, I _am_ kind of special, right?" He finished with a hand over his navel._

_"N-Naruto... this is... this plant is..."_

_"Well, dunno about her, but her fruit is yours." He interrupted the Hokage. "I didn't make it for me after all, I got more chakra than I know what to do for. But other people don't. So... so I thought that maybe I could make something to help them, know what I mean, jii-chan? It's like a chakra battery!"_

_The old man was then escorted out of the grove, still looking at the fruit in wonder. He would have to run a test on it, but he trusted Naruto and the boy wouldn't lie. And if he was telling the truth..._

_Back in the center of the grove, a tree's trunk turned to look at Naruto, a large, green eye opening and looking at him. "Was it... the right... thing to... do?" It asked in a very slow voice._

_"Yeah, I trust him, Hawthorn... He's saved me many times. He believes in me."_

_Two long, delicate arms draped over him, covered in thin, see-through silk, as a voice more seductive than any temptation purred into his ear. "We believe in you too... My King..."_

_The boy smiled and leaned back into the embrace. "I know, my Queen, I know..."_

_A small creature, that looked like a winged human but only a few inches tall, buzzed around. "He's nice, he's nice, is he perverted? I want to prank him! Can I? CanICanICanI?" The high-pitched voice of the trixie blurted out quickly and her Maker laughed._

_"Go ahead, Titania-chan! Just not too much, he's an old man, maybe you can prank someone else and have it fall on him? Jii-chan definitely needs some laughs, eh? What do you say, Oberon?"_

_A large tree, opposite of Hawthorn, turned and nodden slowly, its deep voice booming. "He is wise... He is kind... It was a good choice, Maker."_

_~End Flashback~_

Naruto grinned. Tomorrow was the day. The day he would show them just who the hell they have been messing with.

"Time to kick ass and eat ramen, and I'm all outta ramen!" And he laughed.

**A/N: Another chapter down, this one took a bit of time to get and it wasn't as good as I wanted it to, but I have to move on to the next one some time. Besides, the next chapter will feature home-made rap, beatdowns, pwnage, crazily overpowered jutsu and quite a bit of crack.**

**Of course, you could just decide to adopt the fic and do it yourself *wink wink-pout-pleading puppy eyes***

**After popular demand, or at least the most popular one at this time of writing, Naruto will gain the Greenborn summoning contract, which will be about his pretties, or living/bioengineered plants. The next chapter (which will published immidiately) is some details on the Greenborn. It will be replaced when it's time. Please keep your reviews here for both chapters to avoid confusion.**

**This contract includes the following: Dryads (with the following castes: Petaldancers/Seducers, Thornstrikers/Warriors, Woodshapers/Plantshaping Specialists, Fruitbearers/Healers and Rootcreepers/Assassins), Trixies (small Tinkerbelle-like pixies with mischievous personalities and a great talent for poisons and pranks), Ents (living, yet immobile trees that can tower over the Whomping Willow), Treants (huge tree-men, take a look at LotR's Ents) and the 'grunts' or non-intelligent ones; assassin vines (vines with hand-shaped leaves that like to strangle people, very cuddly too), shambling mounts (golem-like masses of roots, bark and rotting-looking foliage that can combine into greater and greater beings) and topiary guardians (animal-shaped animated bushes). There will be the following bosses: the Queen Of Thorns, leader of Dryads (riding on a chariot of thorned vines, with a large flower bund as her throne), Titania, Queen of Trixies (manic-obsessive pixie with more bravery than an Ent has size), Oberon, King of Treants (wise old man with a large stuff and pray you never piss him off) and Hawthorn, Wise One of the Ents (imagine an animated tree that looks like Yggrasil... no further comments needed).**

**Naruto will NOT gain the summoning contract early on, probably at some point during the time-skip or shortly before it. He will work for it and bust his ass for it, because, quite simply, summoning a whole squadron of Thornstrikers in a wooded, or plant-heavy, area just screams 'overkill'; imagine dead-eyed longbow-women that can meld into trees for ambushing. Consider the havok five Treants could wreak; there are few things more dangerous in sieging than a pissed-off treant. Consider the danger of annoying the pixies, their small size and illusionary tactics combined with an almost unparalleled (except for Fruitbearer Dryads) knowledge of poisons, they could destroy an invading army through its provisions. Consider what would happen if bushes suddenly came to life, turning to huge tigers and then gutting everything in sight, springing to life amongst the enemy's ranks. Consider unfeeling, unrelenting, unstoppable golems of hard vines, able to change their bodies to be thick or thin, tall or short, combining into one to increase their size or breaking down to innocent-looking foliage to hide or play dead... As I've proven in this fic; it's not the size of your gun, it's knowing how to curve the fuckin' bullet -or throw a grenade at'em.**

**Also, I hoped you like the parts with Tenten, as I find it sad that she was never developed further. She's the single respectable kunoichi in Konoha Twelve, pre-time skip, but she is just delegated to last place after it, it's like she never improved, at all! I, for one, love Tenten, she's different, fights different and doesn't always use flashy jutsu; a single senbon between the eyes is just as lethal as a Raikiri, and much less tiring. It's a pity she was never developed. She's definitely more deserving than Ino and Sakura who, at least in cannon and most of this fic, cared more about looks than training. Especially with how Sakura seemed to get so strong in three years but even Naruto seemed the same, stupid Kishi. Anyway, this can end up in a Naru/Ten, but right now she's not romantically interested, it's simply physical attraction. And possibly repressed sexuality, which seems to plague the Naruto world (like, seriously, Kishi's such a prude! Ecchi drawings in one page, everyone blushing at the thought of kissing on the next). The 'Blade and Claw' style is developed by me irl, by the way. It's real fun!**

**Review Reply: **

**Since you have disabled PMs, I feel it necessary to reply here. So here goes:**

***Start Of Reply***

**First of all; thanks for the big, juicy, filling review. It always makes me happy to see such reviews, it shows that you care more for the fic than just a couple of words of enouragement (which are also appreciated, of course). I especially like to hear the opinions of all my readers, their criticism, even just plain joking. The community is what makes this work, otherwise, I'd just be writing on my home PC and you wouldn't have heard of me. So major thanks to you for taking the time to write such a big review :D**

**Now, to the points in discussion; Apparently, since everyone likes the idea of plant-summons (yes, the dryads are plants, not animals or humans), that's what I'll be using. Hope you liked rebuffing Jiraiya like that, I was tempted to have the old perv have a heart attack from all these lines :D**

**The summoning contract won't come into play for quite some time, I'm thinking time-skip, but at least after Sasuke's Retrieval arc (or its equivalent *grin*). I've already highlighted the reasons why up in the A/N. Your idea about the writhing vine monsters will be implemented in Shambling mounts; unintelligent golems of pure pwnage. Some of the dryads will even be able to make them spontaneously grow from surrounding flora (especially their Queen), but these will only be temporary as the plant burns itself out rather than the usual more permanent ones. By the way, have you played Plants vs Zombies? Think Doom Shrooms, jalapenos, potato mines, chompers... Need I go on? Not all of the summons will be intelligent or even mobile. They won't have to, mwahahaha!**

**The whole birthing sequence of a shambling mount is pretty ICK, it looks like a fruit that looks like an orange several times in size just rapidly rots away, bits of it falling apart and just spewing out masses and after masses of thick, dark vines that wrap themselves around a single core-root system before standing upright and groaning threateningly. Yes, I guess that's kind of creepy if you're not ready, especially since the fruit itself looks rather pretty until just a few seconds before it erupts...**

**Since I'll be using some 'elemental' plants (as I've done this chapter for Tenten's affinity test), the Dryads will be able to grow them from scratch if they have enough knowledge. Naruto will NOT have Mokuton or a similar ability beyond his already-stated natural, instinctive understanding of flora. And yeah, people won't look at a rose the same way again.**

**Naruto's summoning contract won't be completed by him; it's one thing to memorize the knowledge, a whole different story actually comprehending and using it. Ask any kid to memorize the rules for Quantum physics, does that mean they can actually use them? Another example is Einstein; he knew NOTHING of maths or physics, he actually had friends of his proving his theories, instead, he was able to combine what they proved and smack them in the face with his theories and making them wonder 'why didn't **_**I**_** think of that?'. No, Naruto will learn fuuinjutsu, he will use them through his leaves (in many ways, hehe), but he won't be able to create the contract, that'll be Jiraiya's job. I'm also kind of iffy on who will sign it besides Naruto and his descendants (which may appear in an epilogue or something)... Was thinking about Sasuke, but he's a pyro... Maybe Tsunade? I'll see.**

**Anyway, hope you like reading this fic as much as I like writing it. Catch your reviews another day :D**

***End Of Reply***

**Review Reply: CyberDragonEX**

**You have also turned off PMs so I've got to reply here.**

***Start Of Reply***

**You're the only person to suggest the Gurahl, and for that alone I like you already. If anyone's read up on them must agree that they're awesome.**

**Unfortunately, as you saw in the fic, I can't give them to Naruto since his 'Greenborn' summoning will be pretty much the same. Which sucks because I don't know who else to give it too. Also, your idea of using chlorofyl is AWESOME. That's a great, believable and quite logical way of using Mokuton (or at least something similar to it) without having to go into overtures about awakening bloodlines, time travel or 'Madara decides he's bored with life and gives Naruto all his power' things. I absolutely love it and am still wondering why the hell that didn't cross my mind! It's such a good idea I'm half thinking about messing up the fic by doing it anyway.**

**As that is practically impossible (my inner perfectionist can't shut up), I could give **_**you**_** the details on the Gurahl summoning so you could adopt this fic (or write a parallel to it) using that idea. I would be delighted to help.**

***End Of Reply***

**OMAKE CORNER:**

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouse Scene Six:**

Jiraiya was very concerned.

Had he spent so much time outside the village that he had no intelligence in his own home? Where was the world coming to?

After the green men aided Konoha in the invasion, he paid a bit more attention to rumours, who knew what other dangerous elements hid in his peaceful home? That was how he heard... of The Warehouse. A building at the edge of Konoha, a place that is now not patroled at all. There is no need; whomever goes into the Warehouse is never seen again and no one from outside Konoha can resist going in there, as if a sweet scent is drawing them in there.

Jiraiya might play the idiot very well, but he is not stupid. Whatever was there, it called people in via some sort of airborne scent, pheromones maybe? In that case, the people of Konoha had already immunized themselves to it since the scent would be everywhere and therefore undetectable. As for Jiraiya himself, he had long since trained himself to resist such methods of control.

Even so, he had to go there. The fact that The Warehouse was owned by one Uzumaki Naruto was even more worrying; the child had bouts of insanity that made Orochimaru seem the epitome of sanity. He had asked the child, of course, but he had only gotten the reply of 'It's just my pretties there, nothing to worry about'.

The mere fact that whatever was inside had such hold on him was even scarier.

So, this night, Jiraiya strapped on his heavy scroll and readied himself for one of the most dangerous nights in his life. He had even abstained from all forms of his usual pleasures to spiritually ready himself.

He had to persevere.

So off does the Gallant Jiraiya leaps, forward into the unknown. Worry fills his mind but determination steels his soul.

Finding the back door was easy, opening it easier still.

A quick sniff confirms his theories, the sweet scent, vaguely reminiscent of wine and honey, was heavily laden with pheromones.

A steady hand pushes the door open and he prowls his way in. Laughter, merry and happy and a few cries of pleasure reach his ears and Jiraiya the Gallant is now more curious than worried.

Then he makes a turn and his body freezes though his blood boils.

In a pool made out of a single leaf, filled to the brim with sweetly scented water, laugh and play several of the most beautiful and stunning women the man has ever laid eyes on. They laugh and joke in a language that he does not understand, they kiss and touch and paw at each other and Jiraiya contains himself no longer.

Brave as ever he raises himself and stands high! Eyes home in on him but his face does not soften!

Then a thud signifies that his scroll is now on the ground and his hands remove his jacket, revealing the highly toned muscle hidden behind it. Even in his fifties, he retains a physique that would make Gai envious.

The women seem at first worried then curious and then happy as he removes his shirt and then his pants.

For Jiraiya decided to purge this place of whatever was that took so many people! And he would do it with no help! Man to woman he would fight!

The next morning, Naruto was frantically trying to open the front door. He had heard that Jiraiya would go to the Warehouse at night, that was when the dryads came out to play! He couldn't allow them to take the sannin away, he was supposed to teach him some more dammit!

Imagine then his shock as the door creaks open to find no package of carefully wrapped gifts, remnants of the once-great ninja.

Instead, he finds all of his dryads unconscious on the floor, not even their shawls on them but without any wounds on them either. Instead, they have a goofy smile on their faces and drool their nectar-like juice carelessly.

"Hahaha! Welcome, welcome Naruto!" Laughed Jiraiya from the leaf pool as soon as he saw his shocked apprentice walk in. "How have you been?"

"F-fine but... but how? The dryads should have..."

Jiraiya only laughs harder as he gets up, seemingly invigorated and stronger than the blonde had ever seen him, a cup of sake in his hand of which he takes a small sip. "Well, let me tell you my boy, it's been almost thirty years since I've been this satisfied!" Another thunderous laugh and Naruto twitches, there are some things that no child should see, and the man was naked.

As Jiraiya kneels to pick up his discarded clothes, a pale, feminine hand, Neira's if he remembers the dryad's name correctly, grabs his own with a powerful grip. He could still break free if he so wished, but he looks at the exhausted, and nearly glowing dryad, curious.

_"Please... teach master all that!"_

Jiraiya laughs boisterously; there has yet to be a woman to share his bed and leave dissapointed, regardless of when, where or the circumstances. He didn't pay to visit brothels; _they_ paid _him_! "When I'm done with him, he's going to be as good as I am." He makes his promise. Wouldn't do to upset a lady now, would it? Must be such a torture to spend all these nights alone...

The smile sent back at him reminds him that no matter what suicidal mission he may go to, he would still have a _very_ warm welcome if he returned. And if that wasn't an incentive to come back from Hell itself, then he didn't know what could be. Those girls could bring the dead back to life!

"So, Jiraiya-sensei, how did you make them not kill you? Could you teach me that? I need to teach it to others if someone wants to be adopted by my pretties." He asked, not yet realizing what that trick was all about.

Well, time to fix that. "I'll teach you, but it's a super-secret jutsu only taught to my disciple, no one may learn of it! Keep it a secret and I'll teach you everything I know."

Poor Naruto agreed too fast, much to the future pleasure of whomever he would bed. It took the blonde a day to realize what the trick was and call Jiraiya 'ero-sennin' ever since.

And though many would ask what terrifying monstrocities hid inside that warehouse, Jiraiya would only somberly say that they were beings that no one but a Sennin like himself had a hope of subduing, and even then for a day at best. That warning was enough to ward the 'magical' Warehouse from would-be intruders.

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	12. Chapter 12

_Chapter 12: Konoha no Tatsumaki (Leaf Hurricane)_

Hyuuga Neji, genius and prodigy of the Hyuuga clan, strongest gennin of his generation and victim to the whims of Fate, sneered at his fellow Chuunin competitors. What were they doing here anyway? It was _obvious_ that Fate had decreed him to be the victor. They were needless, they were pointless, they were useless. For he is Hyuuga Neji and it is _obvious_ Fate had decreed his victory. They should just give up now and save the embarassment of him destroying them easily.

He ignored the fact that one Sabaku no Temari destroyed Tenten in her fight, since, obviously, Tenten was a kunoichi and therefore weaker than him. Or the fact that Sabaku no Kankurou had a mobile weapon platform on his back, since, obviously, he was too weak to fight without cheating. He ignored the fact that one Sabaku no Gaara had beaten Lee, since, obviously, he couldn't be that strong if Lee, the weakest and most pathetic excuse of a ninja anywhere, could harm him so much. He ignored Aburame Shino, Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke, Nara Shikamaru, who had all several accomplishments under their belts, and their own source of pride (though for Shikamaru it was more of a source of fear -his mother's rolling pin was one of his greatest fears).

No, he ignored them all because he was _obviously_ chosen by Fate to win and nothing would, or could, change it.

What he _also_ ignored, but shouldn't, was that he was a mere human, a child at that, and completely and utterly lacked any way of actually understanding the Fickle Mistress. Far greater men than him had tried and shook their heads when they realized their failure, accepting that there were things greater than them. But the Fickle Mistress is also a vindictive one, and never took kindly to hubris. After all, her husband is called 'Karma' for a reason. And he knows Kung-Fu!

No, Neji did not acknowledge any of their existences, especially those two greenhorns, Uchiha and Uzumaki. They were so useless, they were late to their own defeats! Humph, just goes to prove how weak they are, at least they realized that he would defeat them handily and preferred to save themselves the embarassement- What's with all that noice damn it!

As Neji looked around to see what caused all this cheering from the stands (which was weird to him since he hadn't done anything yet), something green fell in front of him. Many greens.

Hundreds of leaves fell onto the ground, as if from a funnel, spreading out and then spirally spinning back into a core that seemed to have a slowly-revealed human shape, flowing smoothly in green-and-brown colored pants and sleeves...

"Uzumaki Naruto in the house! Respect mah fookin' authoritah dattebayo!" The blonde cried out once the leafy haze had retreated back to its storage seals, a wide grin on his face. When his eyes fell on Neji, that grin became vicious, vindictive and promising of great pain.

"Hmph. Loser." Neji sneered.

He shouldn't have. He _really_ shouldn't have. Naruto seal-lessly transformed his clothes into a replica of Neji's, only colored the brightest kind of orange he could imagine. "Hmph. Loser." He sneered back.

"Stop it. Loser."

"Stop it. Loser."

"Shut up! You worthless idiot!"

"Shut up! You worthless idiot!"

"Grrr... I'm going to hurt you!"

"Haha, you're going to _try_, Neji-chan!" Naruto had suddenly reverted to his other attire, only this time it was the same eye-raping tones of orange and yellow. "But, you see, I'm not like Hinata-chan. I'm most _definitely __**not**_ like Hinata-chan. Did you know she asked me to spare you?" His grin became bloodthirsty. "I'll make sure to buy her some flowers for your funeral as an apology."

Neji was unflappable. He was cold. He was emotionless.

But at that moment, he felt a very definite sense of doom crawling up his spine.

"Besides!" Naruto piped up, cheerfully murderous still. "Tenten-chan, you know, your kunoichi teammate? She asked me to kick your ass twice as hard. So yeah, I think I'm gonna follow her command to the letter. Wouldn't want to get a kunoichi with a penchant for metallic instruments of doom, death and destruction angry at me, would I?"

Feeling more than a little bit aggravated, Neji moved threateningly against the blonde, directing his body language to make him appear threatening and superior to his enemy.

"Man, do you have digestinal problems? You look constipated!" Admittedly, Neji's trick would have worked had Naruto not come across enemies that would make the Hyuuga look as threatening as a gnat. The smirking reply almost drove Neji off the edge and he raised his hands in clear threat when he was interrupted.

"There will be no fighting here unless _I_ allow it." The proctor had arrived, a jounin named Aoba, if they were correct, chewing on a senbon.

I just saw you attacking him. Stop before I disqualify you for being unable to hold your grudge, _boy_." The man sneered through his senbon-toothpick. He had seen Naruto's provocation, of course, but the damn brat needed a lesson. He thought that everyone favoured everybody else? Fine, let's show him how it really feels to have no allies then, shall we? "Now, I see Uchiha Sasuke has yet to arrive, but I'm not going to disqualify him yet, he will loose his place if he is unable to appear for his match however."

Naruto nodded, but grinned inside. Sasuke and Kakashi had dropped by his house that morning and gotten one of his tracking leaves. He knew they were on the ledge of the arena, looking at the fights, but they wanted a grand entrance. He had tried to convince them to ride along his leaf tunnel, but they didn't want to so... Meh, their choice, because right now it's time to befuddle and bedazzle! To bring shock and awe!

Time to kick some ass!

On the stands, the leader of the Hyuuga clan, one Hyuuga Hiashi, looked down at his youngest daughter, and the one he actually considered a good one at that, Hyuuga Hanabi. "Watch closely, Hanabi. Your cousin is the greatest Hyuuga of all times, no one has inherited the Hyuuga blood more thickly than him, not even your sister. He is the future of the Hyuuga clan." He told at the eight-year old girl and saw her nod.

Oh, poor, poor Hiashi-kun! Why did you get up this morning?

Down in the actual arena, all competitors except those of the first match and the proctor left, leaving only the recording devices that would transmit the event around the countries. It was technically illegal to do so, but spies had spied the place so much, that Konoha decided to place some cameras there to just get it over with -and make a large amount of money from viewing and selling rights of course.

"Alright everyone, give me a good fight, no killing or I will remove limbs. If I tell you to stop, you do so or I will remove limbs. Give a good show. Ready? St-"

"Hold it!" Naruto suddenly spoke up, interrupting the man. He walked to the center of the arena and turned so he put Neji and the entire Hyuuga clan in his visual. "Before we start, I got some things to say." He rhymed out. "Ready, bitch?" Not waiting for an answer he smirked devilishly. "Then hit it girls, let's kick it to eleven!" Immidiately, a weird music started playing, like quick, rhythmic beats.

"I'm here to whoop your ass

I've read up all your facts

You kill cousins with a seal?

Well tell me, Hyuuga, have any nobility to appeal?

Think you're so hot with your little white eyes?

All I see is a bunch of constipated sissy guys!

Neji can do no better than finding girls to hit

And I'm up to here with your shit!

Hittin' girls feels nice, hittin girls feels good?

You're like the tantrum of a five-year old, dude!

Angsty 'cause you're Fate's bitch?

Do you even scratch that itch?

Grow up, man up

And drop your fuckin' ball sack!

It's true you'd look better in pink

'S more fitting we all think

Listen up, I'm about to make it rain

I'm here to bring the pain!

This is the end of the line, yo!

'Cause I'm Uzumaki Fuckin' Naruto!" Naruto finished by adopting a smug stance, arms crossed over his chest.

The Hyuuga clan was _**not**_ amused. In fact, they looked ready to burst into puddles of blood by the way their pressure was.

Elsewhere however, many people had leaned on one another, laughing so hard they couldn't keep themselves from falling. Kakashi and Sasuke, Ayame, Iruka and Teuchi, even Anko and Ibiki were almost rolling on the floors, laughing at the sheer brazen audacity. Ibiki reaffirmed his belief that the blonde jinchuuriki had a gigantic set of high-grade steel balls to say something like this in public, in an event that was transmitted _all over the elemental countries_!

In Kumo, several ninja and their Kage groaned loudly. "Oh, hell/fuck/shit, there's _two_ of them now!" A certain Bijuu wondered if it could perform suicide and escape its jailor; he was swearing he would go to meet this "buzzing new kiddo, disciple of the ol' eight'o".

In the arena, Neji didn't know what to do, he didn't know what to do! He had _never_ been insulted this way! He had never been _humiliated_ in such a public way before! The entire Hyuuga clan had been insulted in such a vulgar and offencive way that he just _couldn't even think_! He stood there, petrified, horrified and completely stunned, unable to even muster the basic function of breathing or keeping his heart beating. Slowly his face turned from shocked horror to murderous rage and he only thought of three things: 'murder', 'death', 'kill'. He didn't even wait for the 'Fight, Start!' signal before he launched into a vicious attack.

Neji's vision seemed to narrow and focus on Naruto, disregarding everything else, as if he were in a tunnel. His hand, charged with a lethal dose of chakra was launched forward and-!

He just hit an unfortunate leaf as the boy seemed to vanish from sight, appearing in the other side of the stadium.

"Gee, you _do_ realize that you could have been disqualified, since you didn't wait for the singal? Never mind, I'm not gonna give you the chance to call me a coward, I want to kick your sorry butt way too much to let you go that easily!"

Neji was incessed. He didn't know how the damn loser had somehow escaped his blow at the last second and he had no idea how he had done it, but he wasn't about to let it show. So, he activated his Byakuugan. "Hmph, so you escaped. No matter, you cannot escape my eyes a second time!" He sneered.

It was only met with a hearty laughter. "I said 'I read up all your facts', right? I know of your Byakuugan, _everybody_ does, it's supposed to be a doujutsu on equal grounds to the Sharingan, allowing you to see in a 360 degrees around you, see chakra flow to the point you can easily track the keirakukei and also see through objects... But, personally, I think it's just a-" Then he had vanished and Neji had no time to turn around at the sudden chakra presence his eyes warned him about. A strong kick landed right on his behind. "- LIMITATION!" Naruto cried out, falling lightly to the ground as Neji rolled away from him. "What's the matter Neji-chan? Didn't like it? I _did_ promise I'd kick your ass for Tenten-chan, and I still have to start on Hinata's case." He grinned. "Your eyes may allow you to look around you, but your reflexes are your own; if someone surprises you or attacks from outside your range, you're just like any other person!"

"S-Shut up!" To Neji's credit he barely stuttered as he turned blood-red from rage and embarassment. "You know nothing! You're just a pathetic loser, a clanless bastard!"

Up in the stands, Gai facepalmed, followed suit by a recovering Kiba -the dog user might be arrogant but had gotten beaten hands down, he had learned better.

Naruto on the other hand grinned. "On the contrary! Did you even realize I _let_ your entire clan live?" He grinned as he watched the Hyuuga clan members scowl at him. "Think about it! The paint balls I could have replaced with contact poison! The underwear drawers I could have filled with rigged explosive notes! The broken floor boards that I could have placed poisoned spikes underneath! If _I_'m a pathetic loser, then what does that say about YOU! I entered all your clan's bedrooms and not one of you found me out! I could have killed every single one of your clan and you call _me_ a pathetic loser? Get your facts straight, Kinslayer!"

"Don't pretend to preach at me, you bastard! At least I have more talent than you will ever have!" Neji spat back, disgusted, and more than a bit shaken as he realized the truth of the blonde's words.

To many people's surprise, Naruto nodded at the talent line. "Yes, it's true; you have talent and have worked hard at it." Then his eyes turned cold. "But what about someone who has worked just as hard as you? Or ten times harder!" And he had vanished, appearing behind Neji with a powerful kick, making him stumble forward.

"A hundred times harder!" Again he vanished, appearing to the side for a knee at the kidneys, making Neji gasp in pain, even though he avoided the worst by twisting at the last moment.

"One thousand times!" Yet again he disappeared in a puff of smoke, landing a strong full-body elbow tackle on Neji's sternum, making his arms shake at the force he tried to hold back.

"How about _ten thousand _times, Hyuuga Neji?" Naruto disappeared again, but this time four of him appeared around Neji in a manji formation, kunai all around his neck so that if he moved or pushed them away, he would slit his own throat. Then the clones vanished, before the proctor could announce Naruto as the winner. "But this isn't over yet. I'm going to beat you, Neji. I'm going to _crush_ you. I'm going to show you... exactly how it feels to be completely and utterly... dominated." He spat at the boy as his true body appeared from behind the tree.

"You... you lie! I am Hyuuga Neji, Fate has decreed that I win! You cannot go against Fate!"

"Hah! Fate? You think that a lowly human like _you_ can ever possibly comprehend the will of Fate?" Naruto sneered back at his enemy in just the way he had been sneered at. Then he smirked. "Do you even know the secret behind my technique? No? Not even after having used it so many times already? Here, have a hint!" His hands, each in a half-ram seal rose in front of his chest and over his head. "**Konoha Ninpo: Konohagakure no Jutsu!**"

As the green cloud filled the arena, ninja all over the village and many out of it, all wondered one thing; Could that boy possibly have the long-lost Mokuton bloodline?

As Neji looked around, trying to find his way through the leaf mass, Naruto's voice sounded loud and clear, though seeming to bounce around. "While I lack the Mokuton, I've learned to manipulate the one thing Konoha has in utter abundance; leaves! I can use them to blind you, even with your Byakuugan. After all, you can't keep track of so many objects, can you? Even though you can detect the chakra in them now, you are too distracted by having to focus on a thousand leaves, correct? But I am not so limited; the leaves carry my chakra, everywhere they flow I know, everything they touch, they 'ping' back at me, creating an image of everything around me! In this place, my eyes are superior to even your vaunted bloodline!"

The Hyuuga clan's elders ground their teeth and the normal Hyuuga glared at the swirling green mass, but Hanabi was pensive. She was a genius for a reason; while her kin ignored and burried their emotions, she had the talent of being able to suppress them when she had to. That and, as a child, she was much more open-minded than them. She nodded as her bloodline couldn't pierce through the jutsu; there were simply too many objects that moved in her field of vision, unless she could focus on a single point of space, she couldn't even see a few meters around her. Not to mention the pounding headache it caused when she tried.

"You... You replaced yourself with leaves?" Neji cried out, feeling the jutsu weaken, though going by Naruto's smirk, it was done on purpose. "H-how? To do it, you must have filled them with enough chakra that any sensor would be able to detect, much less a Hyuuga!"

Naruto shrugged, the irritating grin never leaving his face. "Well, you know, when you're the student of Konoha's top infiltration specialist, you learn a few tricks. Folding your chakra inwards so it emits nothing is easy enough, even if I can't do it for more than a few dozen leaves at a time." Then his eyes turned cold once more. "Do you understand your position now, Neji? I am so much stronger than you, that you cannot touch me. I can replace myself with any one of these thousand leaves at any point in time. Without your taijutsu, your entire clan is _pointless_! What will you do now? Use a ninjutsu? Oh, I forgot, your clan doesn't learn any!" He laughed mockingly before his left arm pointed at his enemy. "Don't die too fast now. **Konoha ninpo: Hadan**!"

It was with a highly un-Hyuuga-like movement that Neji bent the hell out of the way of the three leaves that had suddenly shot at him. When he looked at the wall behind him, they had embedded themselves completely into the concrete. He gulped; that was worse than Tenten's kunai!

"As you see, I can turn my leaves into blades. Do you know what stops me from having turned my Konohagakure no Jutsu into a killing jutsu? Nothing. You'd have died in an instant if I so wished. From the moment you walked into this arena, you have been alive simply _because I __**allowed**__ it so!_"

Neji was seriously unsettled now. The blonde clanless gennin had really _allowed_ him to live. It seemed that the rumours of the boy being a useless dobe were unfounded. In fact, they were completely the opposite. He'd have to take it seriously or he could loose far more than just a match! "Fine then, I shall get serious as well! Prepare to face the might of the Hyuuga clan!"

Naruto laughed. "The might of the Hyuuga clan? You mean the might of the pink underwear clan!" Then he turned bloodthirsty again. " But it's fine by me, entertain me little Hyuuga!" He laughed maniacally as he sent another hail of leaf blades at the boy. "Entertain me!"

Neji was ready to move from the moment he spoke, but he quickly realized he had underestimated his opponen, how he kept doing it though, he'd never know. The blonde apparently could control the path of his projectiles! He sent only a few of them but spread over in a pattern that destroyed his chances of escape. He could escape, of course, but he'd suffer great injuries, at least a torn arm if not leg. So, wondering why the hell he hadn't gotten the hint when the Konohagakure was used, not to mention after seeing the accuracy of his replacements, Neji spun in place.

"**Hakkesho Kaiten (Eight-Trigrams Heavenly Spin)**!" He declared, grinning at the sight of all these troublesome leaves bouncing off. "Hah! Is this your best? My clan's absolute defence cannot be so easily pierced!"

What he received was laughter. Deep, belly-sounding, 'oh-god-my-ribs-are-breaking' laughter. "You... Hahaha... you think this... ahahahaha, you think _this_ is an absolute defence?" The incredulous look, coupled with resounding laughter made Neji flush in rage, but he didn't move forward. His enemy had proven remarkably resourceful, it wouldn't do to underestimate him. "That, little Kinslayer, is no absolute defence." Naruto grinned and, with a wave of his right hand, parted the still-moving leaves and then spreading his arms wide. "Not since I can breach it so easily!"

"Breach it? Quit lying you fool! There is no technique that can breach this defence! It has withstood enemies more powerful than you can begin to comprehend!" Neji defended his prized technique and, why shouldn't he? It was a Main Branch one, a technique that had taken him a lot of work to learn and master, there is nothing that fool could possibly think that could pierce it!

"Is that a challenge I hear, Neji Kinslayer? Allow me to show you!" A few quick handseals, ending with dragon, and a punch later and Neji knew he had to start the spin immidiately. And it was a good thing too as the blonde cried out "**Konoha Ninpo: Ha no Nagare (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Stream)**!" Which unleashed a spiralling torrent of leaf blades to pour towards him.

But as Neji started spinning, he was terrified to realize that the leaves passed through his defence as if it weren't even there! Small cuts on his clothes, just barely deep enough to draw a drop of blood from his skin, littered his body.

"Wh-what? How!" Neji was quite adept at expressing the feelings of the entire Hyuuga clan at that moment.

"Not so hard really! The Kaiten forces you to spin, I just matched the direction of your spin, ignoring your defence, not to mention cutting down on my chakra cost since I hijack _your own_! Any technique that moves in a circular or spiral form renders your defence null!" Naruto sneered. Then grinned. "I don't even have to get that serious anyway, watch!" And he thrust his left hand up, causing a few leaves to shoot out of the ground and fly up in front of Neji's face. "Your Byakuugan can't see too far into the earth, neither does your so-called ultimate defence protect from that direction! By my reckoning, any Iwa shinobi could kick your clan's ass!" Then he grinned once more, spreading his arms to the side. "In fact, why don't you try to hit me, with your taijutsu? I promise I won't replace myself, nor launch leaves at you. Hell, I won't even _move_ from my spot."

The grin was so infuriating, that Neji forgot his plan to taunt Naruto. He forgot about keeping his cool. He forgot just how _sneaky_ the orange-garbed, ramen-obsessed, log-worshipping blonde could be.

So, he took the chance. After all, his Byakuugan showed honesty; the blonde would keep his promise. An instant later and he was in front of Naruto, already in a stance that caused the entire Hyuuga clan to gasp in surprise. Even Hiashi-sama! "You shouldn't have given me that chance, for it ends now! You're within range of my divination! **Hakke: Rokujouyonshou (Eight-trigrams: Sixty-four palms)**!"

And he was off, the eight-trigrams symbol glowing within his mind, as only he and his enemy mattered. Just as his fingers approached, ready to strike two major chakra points, and nerve clusters as well, something at the edge of his sight warned him to _back the fucking hell off_!

Leaves had come off the blonde's clothes, which he could now see lined with almost a hundred storage seals on each arm and leg, and then flowing like water to surround the grinning blonde. But what made him get away from them was the fact that their chakra-infused cloud extended past the leaf, something he noticed happened to the other leaves, the ones that had cut right into the concrete.

Quickly he changed his direction, coming from the side, but Naruto's hands moved and with them, so flowed the leaves, covering the weak point. Everywhere Hyuuga Neji danced to strike, leaves would already be there, covering their master. Eventually, he had to step back.

Naruto laughed as he saw the cautious look now on Neji's face. "Heh, at least you have some good instincts. Had you approached my leaves at any angle except from a precise 90 degrees, you'd have lost your fingers. And, as you can see, I need no handseals to control my leaves; chakra's made up of half mind-energy and half body-energy. I have worked this jutsu to such an extent that I only need to direct my arms to the general vincinity, kind of like what Gaara-san did. So, you see, _this_, is an absolute defence. I call it the **Konoha no Tate** or Leaf Shield."

"Grrr..." Neji growled, gritting his teeth at the upstart. He hated to admit it, but he was... he was outmatched. He was completely and utterly outmatched. Somehow, the blonde idiot had been taught extremely obscure and powerful jutsu... "You... you have a clan, don't you! What clan is it? The Senjuu?" He 'accused', though not once understanding how close to reality he fell.

Naruto's laugh this time was cold and cruel. "Clan? No, no 'clan'. No 'teacher'. You see, Neji, even though I'm Uzumaki, I have only been adopted to the clan, and it's been dead anyway, so I had _no one_ to teach me. No mother to hold me. No _father to teach me_!" He glared balefully. "No, all this," He waved his hands and the leaves converged around him. "all this... is my own hard work. I was a looser in the Academy, because no one taught me. So I changed myself! I worked, long, hard and against more odds than you can possibly comprehend, and here I am! Not _one_ of these jutsu are due to a bloodline, any Konoha shinobi could learn them, hell any shinobi _period_! And you _**dare**_ mock _my hard work_ by calling it a bloodline? You arrogance knows no limits, you damn kinslayer!"

"Silence! You know nothing! Nothing of the pain of the Hyuuga clan! This detestable seal they place on us, making us slaves!" Neji cried out, incessed about Naruto's constant defiance of Fate.

Another cruel laugh and Naruto slowly, deliberately, lifted up his shirt, showing the black markings of a seal on his navel, a seal infinitely more complicated than Neji's. "Do you honestly think you are the only person with a seal on them? News flash, Fate's Bitch! There are others with far worse burdens than _you could ever comprehend_!" Naruto roared, his chakra finally bursting out and showing everyone that at no point had he really exerted it. "It's time for the grande finalle, Kinslayer. It's time I beat you the exact same way you beat Hinata-chan; superior taijutsu!"

"I-Impossible!" Neji denied it, but still stumbled back. So far, that blonde bastard had done the 'impossible' far too many times for his comfort. "Y-you can't have a taijutsu style stronger than the Jyuuken! It... It's impossible!"

"Well then, suck on this!" Naruto called out, running through a few quick handseals, smirking as he felt Sasuke's and Kakashi's gazes focus on them. "**Konoha Ninpo: Konoha no Yoroi (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Armor)!**"

At once, all the leaves in the stadium, and more hidden in seals, reacted to his technique, converging on him, wrapping around him, covering him, leaving nothing but two, glowing orbs as eyes to flicker behind the shadows of his armor.

Not another word was said as Naruto rushed Neji, causing the him to rush as well, hands ready to strike. At least, he had learned his mistake from last time and the Hyuuga competitor covered his hands with a tough layer of chakra, it might help ward off the worst, but he'd still have to be careful.

But it was hopeless; the protection was all around the boy and filled with so much chakra he couldn't even see the circulation system behind it. So, deciding to gamble everything, score at least one blow, he gathered as much chakra as he could to his left hand and unleashed a powerful thrust with the weight of his entire body behind it. Hopefully he could pierce through it!

It is needless to say how surprised Hyuuga Neji was when his hand went _right through_ the armor in front of him, a hole having appeared just as his attack would land. An excruciating amount of pain made itself known to him just a second later, and he fell to a knee, the leaf-covered form of Naruto looking down at him.

"Is that really your best, Hyuuga Neji? Did you even _think_ about what you were trying to do? I could have severed your left arm from the elbow, if I had wanted to. My armor is impervious to most attacks; the leaves are as hard as steel and connected to each other, even if you drove all your chakra into my armor, at best you'd take out one of them and even then, only if you could overpower my chakra. Even a blunt force wouldn't work; I keep the leaf layer a few inches away from my body, buffering it from concussive forces! You'd need a jutsu, but a fuuton would be absorbed or negated, and a raiton would be pointless since I use wind-chakra, which is stronger! And if you're thinking about katon, that'll only work until I am able to harvest my new fire-resistant tree; its leaves are perfect heat insulators!"

As Neji looked at his abdomen, he only barely noticed the words of his foe, more concerned with the wounds on his body; the leaf blades on Naruto's leaves had made almost two dozen, three-inch deep gashes, all centered around his fist... If he had slashed, or dragged, his hand, rather than jab... If he had just aimed lower, or higher...

Neji looked up at his enemy, the light glancing off him at odd angles. He stood like a _kami_ over him, untouchable by anything he had, superior in all ways, able to determine his fate with but a cold look...

"From the beginning, it was hopeless for you. From the start, I _allowed_ you a chance to show off. Normally, I'd have killed you three times over. For insulting my pride. For insulting the suffering I and others have gone through. For insulting, berating and _attempting to murder your own COUSIN!_" He roared down, blue eyes blazing with something inhuman, a fury so ancient, so deep, that Neji wished he would turn those eyes away from him, he felt like drowing inside them! "But I won't. I won't kill you this day, Kinslayer. But, I want you to remember this; as you are to an ant, so am I to you! If you dare rouse my anger again, Hyuuga Neji, I'm going to destroy you! I'm going to remove any semblance of pride you still have left, and destroy your spirit, utterly and without a trace!"

Then he turned and walked away, as the proctor declared him a victor.

"Besides, the only reason I'm letting you live, is because of your 'weakling', 'pathetic' cousin. Hinata begged me to spare you, prostrated herself to me and promised me anything and everything I ever wanted, if I could just spare her 'onii-sama'."

Then the cheering came, at last rewarding the boy who had worked for it his entire life.

But the stands hadn't been calm. The Jounin had been in unrest ever since Naruto's rapping entrance. The Hyuuga clan was ready to declare a clan feud against the 'upstart'. Three councillors were looking down at the boy in grudging respect, one of them wondering if maybe he should lay off the blonde for a while, if maybe his state as a jinchuuriki, one that showed no special abilities at that, was in fact secondary to being a normal shinobi. Two Kages, shinobi village leaders, looking down with interest and respect, witnessing the birth of a new legend.

Commoners spoke along with shinobi and, no one knows where it began, but they all knew Naruto by a new name now; The Leaf-Style Shinobi!

Up in the stands, Ino was gawking at a smug Sakura. Even if the pinkette wasn't down there, she was proud of her teammate, he had worked hard for every single shred of power he ever acquired, he deserved the recognition he got.

"O-Oi... Billboard-brow... was... did you know Naruto to ever be so..."

"So strong?" Sakura finished with a melancholic smile. "Ino, he slowed down Zabuza, beat a ninja _stronger_ than him, forced Orochimaru to back off, there's few things that are truly impossible when that blonde baka is around." She smiled fondly at her blonde partner.

Of course, Ino being Ino, she misunderstood the meaning of this smile. "W-wait! Sakura, don't tell me! Are you crushing on him?" Apparently, her friend's crush was more exciting than Naruto's show of dominance.

"What? NO!" She denied, quickly. "Don't look at me like that, Ino-pig! I am most _definitely_ NOT in love with Naruto! It's just... It's just... I'm a bit... melancholic I guess. I saw him, you know, grow every day, work like crazy, exhaust himself and still keep going, fall down only to get back up again regardless of exhaustion, I saw him go _insane_ Piggy, and yet come back from the deep end any time we needed him... I look at him now and... I don't feel jealous, and I'm surprised! I can't feel jealous of him! I feel... I feel _pride_ and... and an urge to just work stronger, harder, better, than ever before!" She would have said more, had a cheery voice not interrupted her, making Sakura notice who was right behind her in the seats, for the first time.

"Yup, that sounds like Whiskers, alright." Tenten commented, looking down at her friend and the beaten form her teammate and former crush. "He seems to just bring out the best in people, eh? I heard even the Uchiha's opened up to him lately, the little brooder has definitely been smiling more lately. The midget even helped _me_ with my techniques, let's just say that the next time me and that Suna bitch fight, it's going to be a whole new ball of game!"

"W-wait, aren't you on Neji's team?" Ino asked, suddenly realizing it. "If you talked to Naruto then why..."

"I didn't warn Neji-baka because he needed a wake-up call." She glared at the defeated form of her former crush. "I used to crush on him, you know, like, real hard." She smiled at the surprised looks the other kunoichi had, like they couldn't understand a kunoichi as un-feminine as her crushing. "What? I'm a girl! I get crushes, giggle, read girly magazines and go on shopping sprees! But... When I have to be a ninja, that all is turned off, I become as focused as any shinobi. No, I used to crush on him, so I studied harder than anyone to get on Neji's team, be 'kunoichi of the year', so I'd get paired with Neji, the 'rookie of the year'. Thought I'd have a chance then." She shook her head. "Lemme tell you, tall, dark and brooding is cute. But, angst day in, day out, will tire you. Besides, take a look at Naruto; he doesn't show it, but he's got a body to match Lee's. Here's a tidbit; I've seen Lee deflect shuriken on his abs!"

"Ab-Abs?" Ino and Sakura were equal parts disgusted and amazed, some part also quite interested.

"Yup. It was rather... enlightening. But anyway, Naruto-kun helped me a lot over the month. I feel like I really grew better as a kunoichi." She grinned a bit and then got up, moving towards the upper levels of the stands, where she had spied Lee and Gai. She quietly patted the gloves she now wore and the third scroll on the small of her back. Oh yes, if that Suna bitch showed her face again, she was going to get _owned_! But for now, she had to go visit Lee; Neji could wait.

There was another place where there was great unrest however; the betting booths.

Since everyone but a few had bet against Naruto, a group consisting of Kakashi, Anko, Ibiki, Iruka and Teuchi suddenly found themselves cashing in gains on a 200-to-1 odds. After all, Neji had not managed to land _a single blow_. Really, the only down in one Ichiraku Teuchi's day was the fact that, thanks to laughing so hard, he had spilt ramen on the floor. Well, he'd have to make sure to appease The Ramen afterwards.

At the Hyuuga delegation's seats however, almost all the clan was discussing the matter of the boy, not including a number of not that flattering adjectives and epithets they now lined up on him. Many of them also claimed that 'the demon' had also helped him, somehow.

But none of that mattered to Hyuuga Hanabi. In fact, beyond some confusion on what that demon was, she didn't really pay attention to the words of a bunch of senile old men. "Well, I definitely learned a lot today Father." She looked at Hiashi stoically. "I expect the marriage contract to be drawn up soon, tomorrow at the latest."

"Excuse me?" The man spluttered at his daughter.

"What? The man _destroyed_ Neji, the one _you_ said was the 'future of the Hyuuga clan', the in who's 'veins the Hyuuga blood runs the thickest'? And yet, the so-called 'no-name bastard loser' completely, utterly and totally destroyed Neji-nii-san, without getting hit _even once_!" She looked at her swaying father, as the man looked almost ready to faint or have a heart attack. The Hyuuga Elders looked worse; a couple were already requiring help for apoplexy. "He is a year _younger_ and yet defeated the best our clan had to offer, one even you admitted was almost at jounin-level in taijutsu. Therefore, it shows that our clan's ways were not only flawed, they are pathetic, useless and pointless, they serve no purpose or reason. If we want to maintain our position as the strongest, we need to bring him into our clan, for if another claims him, we will not even come close." She reasoned, calmly, though secretly enjoying the reactions of her elders'. "The only way to guarantee his agreement in marriage is to offer someone of at least a suitable importance, being the heirs to the clan, either I or Hinata-nee-sama should suffice. Or rather, there's not much else we _could_ offer him so that he does not release his techniques that devastated the best our clan has." She paused a bit. "Do not worry Father, I believe that blonde hair and blue Byakuugan would look very good as your grandchildren."

It was only the fact that medics were already there that saved Hyuuga Hiashi from falling off the arena walls to his death, thanks to the not-so-sudden fainting spell. It did _not_ save him from the laughter of everyone who believed in the blonde boy and, as he had placed his clan's seats next to the Jounin box, they were many.

"Well, either Father is happy about having grandchildren in a couple of years or he will be very unhappy. I wonder if I should start seducing Uzumaki-sama from now, at least I should be able to entice him in some private lessons." Her schemes sent the rest of the clan into insensate torpor.

Next to Kakashi, Sasuke was in mixed emotions. Mostly, he was extremely pleased at his best friend's performance. It had been one worthy of respect and he knew the blonde was in all probability the strongest member of the cell, if only in wide-spectrum fights. Damn that Konoha no Yoroi technique too, it made him all but invulnerable to close quarters, leaving only the blonde's favourite style; long range ninjutsu showdown, which he would win nine-out-of-ten thanks to his immense chakra reserves. No, the blonde had come a _long_ way from being a dobe. He had worked, slaved, cried, sweat for it and he had made it.

But, somewhere in the deeper recesses of his soul, Sasuke was also angry; had he not worked just as hard? Had he not been blessed with a great bloodline? Had he not been trained by _the_ Hatake Kakashi, former ANBU Captain? So why was the _dobe_, the _dead last_, so superior to him?

Kakashi's firm hand, or rather his entire body as the man had leaned on the boy for support while he laughed himself to death, calmed him. He was not weaker, he had Konoha's strongest assassination technique in his hand, and no one else would be able to use it properly even if they learned it. No, he was superior, he was still stronger. After all, after mastering his sensei's jutsu, he would get down to learning Naruto's as well. Then again, Kakashi was still snickering, especially as he saw Hiashi, long a thorn in his perverted side, faint.

Next to a scowling Kurenai, Jiraiya was looking down on his godson, a smirk on his face. The little brat had deserved it, kicking the ass of that upstart little Hyuuga, and he knew that, even if Kurenai claimed otherwise, her scowl was more directed at Neji rather than Naruto. After all, the blonde troublemaker had only seriously attacked once, the last blow that finished the fight, not once had he unleashed the torrent of far more lethal techniques he had as the spymaster knew his apprentice would have preferred.

"Well, he definitely _is_ chuunin-level, don't you agree, Kazekage-dono?" Sarutobi smirked at his equal on the Kage box. "He not only studied his enemy's technique but he was able to adapt his own jutsu to counter and nullify the famed Hyuuga taijutsu, a fact made even harder since he is the only one to be able to use his Konoha Ninpo style..."

The Kazekage glared at the blonde boy, who had somehow managed to trip on the last stair going up to join the other contestants, feeling his fingers clench and the stone armrest beneath them crack in protest. "Yes... He is most definitely a... great specimen of a Konoha Chuunin..." He still remembered the fact that this no-name brat had wounded him, without even the help of its demon! So annoying, so disruptive to his plans, just like that other accursed blond!

The Hokage chuckled and turned his thoughts on the defeated Hyuuga boy, it was a good thing the wake-up call came from Naruto rather than a foreign shinobi, at least his adopted grandson let the boy live, however much he shattered his arrogance. Then again, there was the matter of one very particular warhawk, even from here he could see the gears turning, plans forming, words and meetings arranged, all to get the boy under his control. Well, he thought as his eyes turned to steel, not on Sarutobi 'The God Of Shinobi' Hiruzen's watch! The prissy little cripple should back the fuckin' hell away from his adopted family before he bent him over his knee and spanked him with Enma's staff form!

At the same time, in the infirmary, Neji was looking up the ceiling, wondering just how he could lose that badly. True to the blonde's words, he had been dominated and, even if he had been struck only once, it didn't make the fact that he was at his enemy's complete mercy any easier to come to terms with. No, he had been struck only once because Naruto had been kind, he had taken pity on him, he hadn't taken his life as was his prerogative, and instinct, to.

Further thought came to a halt as a person came in, not just anyone though, the heiress to the Hyuuga clan and most hated person in Neji's life, Hyuuga Hinata, the girl still needing a crutch to walk, wearing only a kimono as she couldn't even wear her shinobi outfit thanks to her injuries. She came into the room and gingerly sat down on the chair next to him, looking more fragile than he had ever seen her.

"Nii-sama..." She whispered lowly, almost inaudibly. "Does it hurt?"

He scoffed at that. "No, my injuries are light. The medication has removed the pain but I am forbidden from exerting myself for the near future, as a few muscles have been cut."

Hinata sighed at his clipped tone. "Not that, nii-sama... Your pride, does it hurt? To loose to someone like Naruto-kun?" She didn't look happy at that, only frowning at his grit teeth. "I... I begged him not to kill you nii-sama, begged him not to hurt you but... He said he'd see... I'm happy though, nii-sama, he didn't kill you as he said he would... I was able to protect you, at least this once."

Oh now it was on! Did she think that it was due to her that he was alive? "You think _you're_ the one who stopped him?" Neji spat at her, his mind whispering him that it was true, but he didn't want to listen. "And even if you _were_, why would you do that? Why show mercy to your enemy? Are you so foolish, so incapable of being a shinobi, that you would show mercy to one who wishes for your death?"

"What are you talking about, nii-sama?" She asked and turned to him, allowing for the first time in ages to meet her gaze, and the boy flinched. "I, not once, considered you my enemy. I don't care if you hate me, but I could never hate you, nii-sama. I will always try to protect you."

"Protect me? If you had wanted to protect me, then you should have sacrificed yourself instead of my Father!"

"I tried." Her whisper was so low that even with his shinobi training, he all but missed it.

"Excuse me?"

"I tried." It was louder this time, but no less emotionally charged. "I tried, I told them I'd go... I asked Father to have me sealed and killed for the clan... But... But neither Farther nor Uncle would hear about... F-Father said I was useless, not worth it" Tears now marred her kimono as her cousin couldn't even muster the will to speak. "and... and... U-Uncle said... he said he _wanted_ to do it, he _wanted_ to protect his brother and n-niece... He... he asked me to... to protect you that day and... and I couldn't because I'm a useless coward and... and nii-sama hates me... No matter what I did, I tried... t-tried _so hard_ to save you from the worst duties of our clan b-but Father saw through that and... and he... he was so _angry_ at me... S-said I was... said I was a mistake, my fault that Okaa-san died, my fault that Uncle died, because I'm just a useless failure that can't beat her little sister and... and..."

There were very few moments that Neji felt emotions the way other people do, a lifetime of suppressing them having made them almost redundant to him, but as he saw his cousin break down right in front of his eyes, he couldn't help but hug her and let her cry on his clothes.

Then, he felt his blood run cold as ice just as it seemed his skin inflamed hotter than any fire.

Her kimono had slid off her shoulders, just a bit, but a bit enough to see the skin of her back.

The scarred skin on her back. Long scars, circular scars. Vicious, deep scars. Not at all faded, fresh.

_Less than a month old._

"H-Hinata... y-your back..."

The girl only wept harder and from her broken words, he could make out a single phrase; _"Father was angry at me, again."_

Scars and seals, he realized with a start, were they so different after all?

Hyuuga Neji was not a kind nor caring person. He was jaded, cynic and absolutely convinced of his beliefs.

But at that moment, he would give his immortal soul to get just five minutes with Hiashi-_dono_ and explain to him, in no uncertain terms, what his feelings about inter-family violence were.

_~~ Flashbacks~~_

_"Neji-niisan, c-c-could you c-come w-with me today?" Asked an eight year old Hinata._

_The next day she was limping and flinching from her father's eyes, but he thought nothing of it._

_"S-Sorry nii-sama, F-Father w-w-will be a-angry at m-me..."_

_The next day she spent in her room, but he thought nothing of it._

_"N-Neji-niisama... Please..." A day after she was in pain._

_"N-Neji-nii-sama..." She was in pain._

_"Nii-sama..." Pain._

_~~ End Flashbacks~~_

As the two cousins held each other, that is how a great catastrophe of Konoha would find them.

But that wouldn't come for quite some time now, as most people were anxiously looking forward to the next fight, where two shinobi from opposing villages would fight this time.

Nara Shikamaru, resident super genius and cloud-watcher extraordinaire, was looking up the heavens because, quite frankly, it was too troublesome to glare at them. _'Why kamis? Why me? Not only do I have to fight a girl a _second_ time, but my match came early too... Ah, I should just quit, it's too troublesome to-'_ Any further thinking was halted by Naruto shoving him off the rail.

"And stay there, lazybones!" Naruto shouted at him. "Chicks with short skirts and wind, that should wake up even you!"

"What the hell are you talking about, Naruto? I just want to take a nap..."

"As if you're ever even awake to go to sleep!" Naruto snarked, much to the chuckling of Kankuro next to him, even Gaara raised an eyebrow. "Now stay down there and give us a show, dammit! Ninja girls with weapons are dangerous things to anger!"

"Damn right we are! So get off your arse before I make you!" Temari snarled, anxious and terrified of what was going to come later.

True to his nature, Naruto decided to mess with her head a little bit. "Oh! Mistress, so harsh! Have mercy on us!" He shivered theatrically, getting glared at as well while he poked his tongue at her. "Not the ropes and candles again! At least use the silk whip!"

"U-U-zu-ma-ki!" The Suna-nin screamed, beet red and glaring at her snickering brother. "When we fight, I'm going to shove this fan so far up your ass, you'll be spitting teeth!"

"Oh noes! Temari-goshujin-sama is angry again!" He pretended to have fainting spell right into the hands of Aburame Shino, who was just too unlucky to be too stunned to avoid the blonde. "Shino-kun! Please hide me into your amply-spacious coat! At least we shall suffer this thorny paradise together!"

Shino raised an eyebrow. His left one, which indicated worried question, rather than his right one which indicated curiocity.

"Uzumaki-san, please extricate yourself from my clothing. It is most uncomfortable."

"Brrr! So cold!" Naruto shivered, momentarily henge'ing into a block of ice. "That why you keep such a heavy coat, Shino?"

"... My clothing preferences are not for discussion nor appraising. I wish to be left alone."

"Aww! Did you have a crush on Kanky-chan and got pouty he wouldn't fight you?"

_'Kanky-chan, heh I'll have to remember that one!'_ Temari thought, still chuckling at the insane blonde's antics. She quickly refocused however. No matter how cute he was, no matter how cute _anyone_ was, or how attractive or nice or whatever they were, she still had a heavy burden that she would have to carry. _'For the sake of Suna my ass... some idiot just got bloodthirsty but is too damn of a chicken to do something about it...'_

The proctor however managed to get that temporary lull in quips as a sign to start the fight already, if he let those children go on, they wouldn't stop for days.

It was a match to... well, definitely _not_ end all matches. Superior skill versus superior tactics.

The Suna ninja, Temari, was a mistress of Wind jutsu, unleashing many, powerful cutting gusts, strong enough to gouge deeply into the concrete walls, and not once or twice either.

Her enemy however was a Nara, a lazy, slothful clan that wished only to watch the clouds and live an average life. Unfortunately, they also had absolutely insanely high Intelligence Quotients, Shikamaru himself had over 200.

It a textbook-almost display of brains over brawn, Shikamaru trapped Temari in his shadow, using many distractions, advancing of time to elongate shadows and the small hole Naruto had dug with his leaves to get to Neji.

And he promptly gave up, citing low chakra reserves.

Truth be told, it _was_ an exciting battle, but only to ninja, as it showed the tactics, awareness and grace-under-fire that a Chuunin required beyond combat. But, for civilians, who only wished to see flashy jutsu and fast-paced combat, it was a debacle. Admittedly, it might have been received better had it been fought _before_ the almost legendary fight between Naruto and Neji -betting booths were still being swarmed.

But there was more trouble in paradise waiting for the viewers.

The top-competitor of the event, sole survivor of a powerful clan, wielder of a legendary kekkei-genkai and student to one of the strongest jounin Konoha ever produced... simply wouldn't show up. Twice his match had been postponed but now they were giving an ultimatum, appear in a few seconds or automatically forfeit.

Even Kakashi would admit they cut it close, but it wasn't his fault; pulling one of his legendary late routines on the entire shinobi world? How could he refuse?

So, just as the proctor was calling "Two... O-" He appeared, shocking the crap out of the man as leaves, left over from Naruto's show, picked up, spun, caught on flame and dispersed to ash, revealing Sasuke and Kakashi, standing back-to-back, looking rather pleased with themselves.

_'I'm going to wipe that smug grin off his face dammit!'_ Kurenai cursed, trembling in rage at the man's cheek. It wasn't enough for him to get her under probation for neglecting a psychological problem of her student, but to break the rules to such a degree? Preposterous! Vandalous! Absolutely Unbelievable!

It _might_ have become a little bit worse as her friend Anko, who still no one knew how exactly the two of them ended up friends while being so different, was laughing at her and telling, rather loudly, that her flushed, _in anger!_, face was a blush! A BLUSH! By Kakashi! What did she have to blush at him? Nothing! He might be a legendary ninja, with a damn handsome face when he took his headband off, unbelievable talent and a legacy in his own right, but she wasn't blushing! She was _angry_! She was furious!

"Anko shut up! I'm _not_ in love with Hatake-teme!" She screamed at her friend, getting a 'denial is the first stage, Nai-chan' line from her friend.

Next to the two women, Asuma sighed. Was having a peaceful drag _too_ much to ask for? Why, why did he have to be attracted to this cigarette-hating, man-abusing, strong-minded woman?

"Nice one, Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto cheered his teacher as the man came up to ruffle his head and ask how the match went, he had to keep up appearences after all. "Nice one, not as flashy as mine, but still, really got the suspence going there!"

Kakashi eye-smiled at his student. "Take it as a lesson then, Naruto-kun, pull them and pull them until they can't take any more and just before they snap, go full speed and ram it in! Give it all you've got! Full-speed and strength! Deeper and deeper, making them squeal in-" Kakashi began in a rave, until he was untimely interrupted.

"Ahem..." Baki interrupted with a nasty glare.

"Oh yes... sorry about that." He apologized, smirking internally at how he got a rise from the normally emotionless man. _'Yep, still got it!'_

What could he say? The Sharingan had infected his mind with his old friend's pranking tendencies.

Well, the Sharingan _did_ make for the ultimate pranking aid; not because of chakra seeing or anything, but because you would _always_ remember the faces of those you punk'd.

Then again, it might be thanks to Naruto's pretties. Heh, he still had to thank the blonde for those plants. Natural stuff's the _best_.

But down in the arena, despite his smirk, Sasuke was pensive. It wasn't just the fact his enemy was strong, hell, that's what he had come for in the first place! It was that his enemy was a foreigner and a very bloodthirsty one. Against a Konoha ninja, he had no problems; both would hold back a bit, if subconsciously, because they are almost family. But a foreigner wouldn't have such problems; he'd go for the kill from the first instand.

Worse, Kakashi had warned him; Gaara wasn't a normal ninja. He was a jinchuuriki, a person selected for a burden beyond anything else. Despite Sasuke's original belief that having a Bijuu's power on your beck and call, it was quickly stopped by just a few sentences from his teacher. _"Power? What about the demon within, attacking your mind, destroying your very soul? What about never sleeping or ever dreaming? What about the looks of the people, who think you are nothing but the Bijuu inside you? Jinchuuriki are not blessed; their demons take far more than they ever give, friends, family, bonds in general, being the first to vanish, a loneliness without beginning or end; most of them never know a mother's touch or a father's smile. Equal exchange Sasuke, equal exchange, but sometimes, it is not _that_ equal..."_

After thinking it for a bit, he agreed. Living alone, forever separate, hunted down by your own family, never loved or wanted... No, he had been in that hell. And he wouldn't wish it on anyone.

That is why he steeled himself; his enemy had no friends, no bonds with anyone. No mercy. But he had to take him down, not by killing but by defeating, hopefully by mercy.

But how to get to that, he didn't know. At least, he thought, Kakashi-sensei gave him a written version of a powerful anti-jinchuuriki seal to carry with him, just in case the boy went mad and lost control; even Kakashi might not be able to react in time. Of course, the seal would require skin contact,, which was easier said than done considering the redhead's absolute defence, but he hoped that he'd be able to make it.

So, lightly hopping on the balls of his feet, he launched forward, a speeding blur.

Spears of sand came at him, but his sharingan had long since warned him, and he dodged. Jump over! Roll to the side, take a kunai, make dashing slash, throw the kunai and replace with it!

"**Fuuma Shuriken: Kage Hi-Fuusha (Evil Wind Shuriken: Shadow Fire-Windmill)**!" Sasuke retrieved, deployed and unleashed his Fuuma shuriken at his enemy, filling it with katon-chakra, multiplying its destructive capabilities.

The last Uchiha clicked his tongue in annoyance. That sand was really troublesome. It was a completely automatic defence, Gaara didn't look from his sand, he had thrown a second Fuuma Shuriken in the first one's blind spot, but the sand still blocked it, proving that Gaara played no part in it.

Worse, he cursed, he had to move_ fast_!

Up in the stands, Ino and Sakura were holding each other, tense and scared, having witnessed their crush just barely dodge the two, still red-hot, giant shuriken, thrown with such force that, not only did they firmly lodge themselves into the arena walls, but they had deformed mid-flight! "Sasuke-kun!" They both cried, but quickly turned to the chuckling Naruto in rage.

"Come on, Sakura-chan! Sasuke's strong, stronger than me in some areas! No way, _no way_, that metal junk came close to hitting him! He's just downplaying his skill to surprise his enemy!" The blonde said confidently, smiling as he watched his black-haired friend leap around to avoid getting filled with holes. "OI! SASUKE!" He cried out. "ARE YOU DODGING SO NARROWLY BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT SURE WHETHER YOU WANT TO GET IMPALED OR NOT? OR IS IT BECAUSE YOU _WANT_ TO GET IMPALED IN A VERY SPECIFIC PLACE!"

Even while Sakura and Ino chased him around with righteous feminine fury, he still laughed, he'd seen Sasuke's smirk widen just a little bit and his pace pick up.

"Impressive my Eternal Rival!" Gai commented, but not as loudly as other times. "You have given him my Lee's speed! Truly he's a genius!" He said, sparing a look at his favourite student's hurt look, the poor boy was crushed. The Uchiha had learned in a month what took him months and years!

"Hmm... Did you say something Gai?" Kakashi snarked at him, knowing how much it annoyed the loud man. "But, really, no. Lee-kun gave him an advantage, but it's pushing Sasuke-kun hard, he's going to be sore tomorrow, but if he can pull through today..." He commented as he saw his student pull off another great kawarimi and launch a strong Gokakyuu no Jutsu. Even if it didn't hurt Gaara, it still heated up the sand. But it wouldn't be enough; Gaara was a jinchuuriki, he wouldn't have gone through B-ranked missions without a scratch if a simple Katon jutsu could stop him. No, Sasuke had no choice but to get serious...

And apparently, the boy himself had come to the same conclusion. Landing out of Gaara's apparent range, on an arena wall, Sasuke reconsidered his options. He _could_ use the Karyuudan or the Ryuuka, which are a couple ranks _over_ his Gokakyuu, but he had no guarantee that the redhead nutcase's sand would stay out. In fact, judging by the chakra running through it, he was sure that his katon would be ineffective.

_'My clan house for Haku-chan, water should weaken his defences and her wind would have made my attacks much stronger but... seems I have to take the shot...'_

He didn't really want to use it, Kakashi-sensei said that it was for tough moments only, and he couldn't use it many times either. Just two, maybe three, times per day...

_'I have no choice... If the Karyuudan doesn't work, I'll be wide open and just as exhausted... No, this is the only way.'_ Finally making up his mind, he quickly flew through three, particular seals and held his right hand with his left, pointing it down and away from himself. _'To paraphrase the mini-green monster, time to abide by and protect my right to kick ass!'_ He thought, unusually cheery for his usual mood lately. What, he's happy to use a B-rank, kick-ass jutsu, so sue him!

Breathing in deeply, knowing that for the few seconds that will be impossible, and setting up his final ace up his sleeve, Sasuke dashed forward, leaving the sound of a thousand chirping birds behind him.

Spikes came at him, left right and center, but his sharingan told him, so he used them. Adrenaline making his heart beat thump loudly in his ears, he charged, head first, into his enemy's stationary form, covered by a thick sphere of sand.

At the last moment, his fist launched forward, the birds crowing one more time!

The dome of sand was opened, letting light in for only an idea of a second as the hole was firmly plugged by Sasuke's arm.

"Wh... what's this? Mother... Mother! It... it feels weird... is it... pain? It's pain! I'm in pain! Blood! MY BLOOD! AAARGH! I'M BLEEDING!"

Such was the surprise of the entire Suna people that they missed Sasuke's counter-snark. "Oh, shut up wuss! You ain't seen nothing yet!" Nor the little motion that released a catch in his arm-warmers.

"AAARGH! MORE BLOOD! **MORE BLOOD!** MY BLOOD!" Gaara shrieked in terror as he felt something else pierce his flesh, just as his enemy's hand had struck his shoulder. Inside him, 'Mother' decided that enough was enough and smacked the Uchiha scion back with her hand.

But she had no eyes to see Sasuke's victorious smirk as he made a hand sign. "Go to sleep, idiot! _Katsu_!" He commanded, causing the explosive tag on the kunai he had stabbed Gaara with to explode, right inside his 'absolute defence'!

Sand went flying and two Sabaku siblings that hadn't been fighting were already soaring through the air, ignoring their orders to stand down, hoping to get to their little brother.

Sand went flying and chaos erupted as the proctor realized that something was _wrong_ and he was nowhere near being qualified enough to handle a berserk jinchuuriki.

Sand went flying and in the chaos of people feinting, attacks and counter-attacks, it slowly cleared to show Gaara, with his entire left side useless, bloodied and torn by the point-blank explosion.

As the sand cleared, Sasuke had no time to feel smug, because in an instant, Kakashi was standing next to him, blocking a kunai. A kunai thrown by a ninja, the Jounin Baki, Gaara's sensei.

Looking around him, Sasuke was stunned to see dozen other Konoha ninja start fighting... fighting against Suna shinobi, and Oto ninja?

"Sasuke!" Kakashi's voice awoke Sasuke from his stupor, calling for his attention. "We're under attack by Suna and Oto!" Pausing to kick Baki away with a vicious kick, Kakashi continued. "Gaara, he's a valuable part of the invasion! Do NOT let him release his Bijuu in Konoha at all costs!"

Of course Karma decided to mess around as, instead of letting Sasuke use the bijuu-suppressing seal there and then, the remaining two Suna Siblings grabbed their brother and ran. At least Fate decided to fix her Brother-in-Law's mess and had Gai kick a wall to rubble.

"Sasuke, wait!" Naruto, Sakura and Shikamaru landed next to the boy, kunai in Sakura's hand as Naruto had leaves hovering around him. "Wait, we're coming with you!"

"No, this is _my_ fight!" Sasuke tried to make them stay, it would be dangerous enough as it was, he mulled as he tossed a bunch of shuriken to discourage an attacking ninja. "Kakashi ordered _me_!"

"Sasuke, take some help and go!" Kakashi shouted over his shoulder, landing a punch on Baki to push the man away. "No time to worry about shit right now!"

"Sasuke, Sakura, wait." Naruto stopped the two from going off, taking something from his ninja pouch on his back. "Jiji's in trouble, I have to stay... But, take these." He handed them a few weird fruit. "The violet grapes are for chakra, don't eat them unless you're almost out, you hear me?" He snapped at them. "They have about as much as _I_ do at full-power, _don't_ mess with them! And the red one's for you, Sasuke, it'll boost your Katon, hopefully, but it'll last for only a few seconds, so make'em count!" Then he pushed the three gennin through a wall, ignoring Shikamaru's 'troublesome' whine and turned around, leaves already forming a shield to block others from pursuing them. "Good luck." Even though he knew they hadn't heard him, he knew they felt his words, and he felt their own benedictions as well.

It was time to fight, Sasuke had it in his hands, he had trained for this enemy and Ero-sennin had told him he had given a bijuu-suppressing seal to Kakashi for Sasuke's use. Sakura and Shikamaru were smart too, they would be able to help. But, more importantly, he knew his own station in a village attack, in any combat; he was a hammer, a blunt, wide-area force that took down many enemies at once. Sasuke was the scalpel, he was the one best suited for one-on-one combat. In that fight, he might have been able to help, but Gaara had far more experience and talent in using his sand than Naruto had with his leaves. No, his place was here, and it was time to make it count.

Naruto, stone as cold and grim as a block of granite, so weird to be on his usually smiling visage, leapt to the center of the arena, hands already ready to start his Konohagakure. He made a subtle movement with his hand and readied himself.

"ALL! BETA-OMEGA THREE ON UZUMAKI! NOW!" Kakashi's cry came as he dashed at him and Uzumaki Naruto dove into his abundant chakra.

In that dark, vivid place where his power flowed like an upset river god, another being opened its eyes after many months.

_**"So... a guardian you are? Kukukuku! Fine, boy! Show me your strength! Weather the Hate! Quench the Fury! Control the Rage! Show me your convictions!"**_

The battle for Konoha's survival... had began!

**A/N: And another one bites the dust, yeah yeah , another one bites the dust!**

**Also a minor disclaimer here; I don't own Epic Rap Battles Of History nor do I have any rights to them. For those familiar with the youtube show, I took and paraphrased four of their lines from the Chuck Norris vs. Abbe Lincoln episode. If ERB is reading this fic (which I doubt, but hell, you never know); you guys are awesome, great laughs with those vids!**

**So, I have two questions here: Most pressing one; should I have the Greenborn make an appearence? If they do, it'll be on the Saru Vs. Oro fight, the Queen of Thorns in particular. If not, they'll appear at a later date. Second one; should I give Tenten a bloodline? This is just to poke at Neji's looking down on her and her wanting to belong to a clan even nobler than the Hyuuga. If chosen, the bloodline will be a chakra-based one named the 'Tentei', or 'Heavenly Emperor'. No, it won't have Holy or Yin or Yang chakra, just normal elements.**

**A reviewer pointed out that the last chapter was getting too 'sexual' for his liking. I'd rather resolve that problem here; there will be NO lemons. Not between Naruto and his plants, not between Naruto and another human, not between plants and humans or even humans and other humans. I think there will barely be even a hint of lime there. Teasing however, or sexual thoughts, they are a natural part of life, thinking and hormones. So, is it strange that a girl in her teens (Tenten is older than Naruto so that should put her anywhere within 14-15 years of age, where she's just starting to get curious about things) would begin to get thoughts about people? Hell, they have thirteen year old kids train to murder; is it too much of a stretch to say that consistent use of chakra hastens the onset of puberty? I'd think no. Anyway, most of it was done in Tenten's point of view, which won't be there all the time. And Naruto is **_**not**_** going to tease his pretties (he's the victim there actually). Besides, I think it showed such hints from chapter 2; Naruto making sexual remarks to unbalance Kakashi. All in all, I don't think this fic is focused around sexual tensions or things like that; it's humorous first and foremost.**

**Hiashi isn't exactly evil, but he is certainly quite dark; not only had he lost his wife, but also his twin brother, believing that Hinata's birth weakened his wife so that Hanabi's birth killed her, and since Hinata is 'useless' then she shouldn't have been born because she wasn't 'worth' his wife's life. But, also, do not forget that physical punishment wasn't considered 'outlawed' until relatively recently in Japan, definitely not in a clan-based system such as in Naruto's world, not in a world where killing is an every day affair; he could beat her, abuse her, and call it 'discipline', and no one would ever be able to say anything. Which, with Hinata being so shy, means that she would never dare to speak to anyone about it, lest she brought her father's fury on them.**

**New Jutsu:**

**Konoha Ninpo: Konoha no Yoroi (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Armor)**

**Cost: B, Control: B, Rank: A**

**An upgraded, or rather altered, form of the Konoha no Tate, the Leaf Armor is made in much the same way, though it takes up more leaves to properly form. It covers the user in a layer of chakra-reinforced leaves, which are held at a distance of about two inches from the user's body. This is not only done thanks to the wind-chakra that turns the leaves to blades, but also because it provides protection against bludgeoning blows that batter the armor; otherwise, even if the leaves are steel-hard, the user would take damage none the less, since concussive force is transferred through contact. By eliminating contact, it nullifies such blows. Wind-based ninjutsu are not exactly nullified by the armor as they are ignored; the winde currents around it makes wind jutsu flow around the armor. Similarly, raiton jutsu are also countered since wind is stronger than lightning. The only real weakness of the jutsu is katon techniques, as they would easily burn the leaves, doubly so thanks to the wind-chakra infusion. Finally, it is possible for the user to not only break apart or reconfigure parts of the shield (such as to create added protection by a Konoha no Tate or increase damage capability via Ha no Nagare or Haken), the user may also create small bursts of wind from any part of the armor with little concentration, but doing so weakens the overall wind-chakra in the leaves and it is not such a great boost either for it does little more than temporarily boost a jump or dash.**

**OMAKE CORNER:**

**Alternate Neji Fight v1:**

"You cannot win!" Neji spat out, nastily.

"Oh is that so... well, how about I beat you with just one, single jutsu?" His enemy replied, coyly and smugly.

"Hn! Go ahead, dead last! Give it your best shot, I'll even wait for your hadseals!" Neji would of course stick to his word, he would wait for the blonde's handseals, but after that, it was open season on his ass.

"Well, " Narut said taking out a large scroll from the pack on his back. "tell me, Neji, what do you know of Summoning Contracts?"

"What does that have to do with anything? Do you claim to have one?"

"Oh no, I don't." Naruto was truthfull and at the same time extremely smug. "See, Summoning Contracts take a long time to create, at least half a year and that's at best; free summons, summons on hand helping etc. etc. But, I didn't have that much time now, did I? So," Naruto smirked as he spread blood on the scroll. "I made myself a shortcut." He smirked.

Realizing that maybe he shouldn't have given the blonde the opening, Neji launched himself in a mad dash.

He didn't make it.

"**Kuchiyose no Jutsu!**" The summoning scroll, keyed to only a single being, was activated.

Then again, he didn't _need_ a different summon.

Smoke billowed outwards and up, higher, higher, higher and-!

**BOO**_-splat-_**OOM!**

**"Greetings, humans. I am Oberon, King of Treants."**

Every single foreign ninja simultaneously thought the same thing: _'__**Fuck. Me. Sideways.**__'_

Towering over the arena, hell, towering over the Hokage monument, the Treant Oberon looked down kindly at the humans that gaping at him on an arena that reached at most at his knees.

"Uzumaki wins due to killing his enemy by having his summon step on him."

Orochimaru proved his tactical genius in choosing to _stay the fuckin' hell away from the giant fuckin' tree man of doom_ and cancelling the invasion.

Neji was dead, and there was much naturistic rejoicing!

**Alternate Neji Fight v2:**

"You cannot win!" Neji spat out, nastily.

"Oh is that so... well, how about I beat you with just one, single jutsu?" His enemy replied, coyly and smugly.

"Hn! Go ahead, dead last! Give it your best shot, I'll even wait for your hadseals!" Neji would of course stick to his word, he would wait for the blonde's handseals, but after that, it was open season on his ass.

"Well, " Narut said taking out a large scroll from the pack on his back. "tell me, Neji, what do you know the cool thing about Shadow Clones?"

"What does that have to do with anything? Do you claim to even be able to use such a high-level kinjutsu?"

"Of course, otherwise I wouldn't have asked, would I? But, you know, the cool thing about Shadow Clones is that, despite being replicas of me, they have no physical body, not a stable one, they are merely masses of concrete chakra. Do you know what that means? They don't have a real Keirakukei, a real chakra circulation system. _This_, my dear Neji-teme, means that, if you know how, if you can modify them properly, Shadow Clones can be created while having their keirakukei already altered to house one or more ninjutsu, performing them without handseals. Do you get where I'm going Neji-teme?"

Neji glared but nodded. "Regardless, such a modification would take a long time to create, the jutsu's basis would direct the created body in a mimcry of your own."

"_Precisely_!" Naruto grinned at him. "Which means that I can't just create them in the midst of battle. Which is why, I came up with _this_." He said taking out a weird ball, it was half white and half red with a large, grey button. "This is my strongest modified Shadow Clone. I choose you! CHARIZARD!"

Neji had only enough time to think _'That's one big muthafookin' lizard'_ before the irritable clone decided to use one of the ninjutsu instilled in it.

Aoba looked at the pile of smoking ash at his feet. "Yeah... I think that qualifies as a victory... Oi, Uzumaki, good job now re-seal your clone and go back."

"Umm... yeah about that... I can't actually... you know, re-seal this one."

Moments later, the berserk clone, in attempting to destroy the puny brat who created him, accidentally incinerated the Kazekage. That point became moot when Sandaime saw the charred remains of his former favourite student.

Charizard was awarded a big medal, and there was much otaku rejoicing!

**Alternate Neji Fight v3:**

"You cannot win!" Neji spat out, nastily.

But, instead of a reply, Naruto took out a guitar, started strumming it and began to sing in a low, somber song. "Shoop da whoop... I'm a... charging mah lazoooor... o_o_o_o_o_o_oh... I'm a-chargin' mah lazooor... to the end of time..."

"Hah! What an absolute weakling! Has your mind shattered to such a degree? Not unexpected when faced with a prodigy of the mighty Hyuuga clan, such as I! Idiotic antics and luck can take you no further! Now submit and save yourself the embarassement!" Neji sneered, but didn't notice how a few, more knowledgeable shinobi were vacating the seats; in his arrogance he hadn't even activated his Byakuugan to show him the humongous amounts of chakra the blonde was gathering.

Suddenly, the slow tempo of the song changed and it became faster, harsher, Naruto going into a headbanging state. "SHOOP DA WHOOP! I'M A-CHARGIN' MAH LAZOR! YEEE_EEE_EAH! I'M A-CHARGIN' MAH LAZOR!"

"Fine then! If your insanity is so great, I shall release you from your pathetic life!"

**"SHOOP DA WHOOP!" **Naruto stated, planting both feet to the ground, arms spread wide (can't damage the guitar after all) and opened his mouth, the booming voice continuing regardless. **"I'M A-FIRIN' MAH LAZOR-** _**BLAAAARGH**_**!"**

A few moments later, two ANBU were looking at the feet that were all that was left of the former prodigy, the exams cancelled due to immense property damage, at least the Hokage Monument now had a nice, long tunnel they could use. "He has been completely disintegrated..."

"Yes, but _how_?"

"Energy."

"What energy? Fire, electrical, _nuclear_?"

"No. Just... Pure... Energy!"

Naruto was identified as the strongest ninja ever, and there was much scientific rejoicing.

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouses:**

Growing plants was hard work. Growing _living_ plants was quite a bit harder.

Thanks to a regimen of high-quality fertilizer and vitamins, along with copious amounts of raw chakra, Naruto's Greenborn were growing in an accelerated rate; most reached their majority in less than a few months. He would stop doing it soon, of course, but for now he wanted them to flourish, and to do that he needed them to reproduce and age quickly.

However, that had a small, unfortunate event; all Greenborn went through an 'imprinting' phase, much like humans do. Only, in their case, thanks to the growth accelerants, they went through the entire phase in a single day, a day where the new living plant had to be watched and carefully nourished.

Therein lies the problem; Naruto was in the Forest of Death, the Dryads were communing with nature (a process that involved burning various specific plant leaves and eating glowing mushrooms), the Ents and Treants took until midday to say hello, the lest that could be said about Orks the better and Titania was... Well, Titania is actually the reason why every Ent, Treant and Dryad would curse the Flames of Youth.

Titania found it very funny to spirit away one of the treant saplings and set them loose in one of the many training grounds of Konoha.

_Unfortunately_ for every Greenborn's sanity, she chose the one a certain... passionate... individual trained.

"YOOOSH! EXPLODE! BY THE POWER OF THE SPRINGTIME OF YOUUUUUTH! BUUURN, MY FLAMES OF YOUUUTH! I SHALL RUN AROUND THE VILLAGE ONE HUNDRED TIMES ON MY HANDS AND IF I CANNOT DO THAT I SHALL PUNCH THIS LOG ONE THOUSAND TIMES AND IF I CANNOT DO THAT I SHALL-"

The poor sapling was exposed to the power of Youth for almost twelve hours, as Titania forgot about him since she tried to play a few pranks on Konoha's High Coucillors (which involved glowing mushrooms, five-pronged leaves, smoke and cheese).

The next day, before even sunrise;

"EXPLODE WITH THE POWER OF YOUUUUUTH!"

It might not have been the first time Oberon and Hawthorn spoke as one, but it _was_ the first time they skipped the pleasantries. "**TI-TA-NI-AAAAA!**"

And that is how the Green Beast of Konoha gained a mega-me to go with his mini-me.

But there was _no_ rejoicing.

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	13. Chapter 13

_Chapter 13: Chishio Konoha (Bloodied Leaf)_

"Woohoo! Get'im, Sasuke!" Naruto screamed at the top of his lungs, seeing his best friend charge the Suna jinchuuriki. Next to him, Sakura and Ino provided just as vocal support, though Kakashi remained silent, though proud and smug as well, if you knew where to look.

That's when things went wrong. White feathers seemed to start falling, bringing with them a feeling of drowsiness that addled thhe mind.

Seeing one of them land so close to his nose, Naruto blew air at it, but when it didn't move, he cursed. "Shit... It's a... gen...jut...su..." But, unfortunately for him, he _still_ sucked at that particular area of shinobi combat and he was already going to sleep.

An instant later he was jerked awake, Sakura's cool fingers on his forehead. "Wake up, Naruto! We're under attack! Kakashi-sensei is already going down to Sasuke-kun!"

Chaos all around him. Ninja leaping to and fro, weapons thrown, jutsu shouted...

Damn it... Damn it all...

Why? Why does it have to be this way? Why do they have to attack, to kill? Can't they all just _get along_?

Fine! Fine then! If that's their choice, if they don't rise above the muck of death they willingly entrench themselves into, if they can't get past their fear, their hate, their inability to understand...

Then... then _he_ had to... he had to... to defend everyone. Because, as much as hates killing, as much as he despises and dreads that day that his hands will no longer be white, but red... He is a guardian. A protector. And sometimes, when no other choice is given, when one cannot hold back any longer, then, in order to protect, in order to safeguard that to which he swore his life for... then, even the benevolent protector must take up arms.

_"If you wish for peace, prepare for war... That's an ancient saying... and a load of crap..."_ A grizzled ninja, disabled by his lack of right leg and arm, had told him.

"Sasuke, Sakura, wait." Naruto stopped the two from going off, taking something from his ninja pouch on his back. "Jiji's in trouble, I have to stay... But, take these." He handed them a few weird fruit. "The violet grapes are for chakra, don't eat them unless you're almost out, you hear me?" He snapped at them. "They have about as much as _I_ do at full-power, _don't_ mess with them! And the red one's for you, Sasuke, it'll boost your Katon, hopefully, but it'll last for only a few seconds, so make'em count!" Then he pushed the three gennin through a wall, ignoring Shikamaru's 'troublesome' whine and turned around, leaves already forming a shield to block others from pursuing them. "Good luck." Even though he knew they hadn't heard him, he knew they felt his words, and he felt their own benedictions as well.

But within, his thoughts swarmed elsewhere... _'I am Jinchuuriki, the strongest guardian of my village, their trump card... It might be a destiny thrust upon me, but I take it up of my own free will. I might not have any skill in using Kyuubi's power, but I will make up with my own. I am Uzumaki Naruto, Jinchuuiki of the Kyuubi no Yoko, and meanest motherfucker these invaders will have the bad luck of coming across!'_

And in his deepest of depths, in a place in his psyche that he had yet to find, _something_ awoke, something ancient and evil, a sleeping force of Nature. It grinned as it saw its host, witnessed his heart. And finally, it spoke, intentionally letting him hear it.

_**"So... a guardian you are? Kukukuku! Fine, boy! Show me your strength! Weather the Hate! Quench the Fury! Control the Rage! Show me your convictions!"**_

Because, in all his hosts, he had yet to meet one who did not want his power, no matter the circumstances. Mito wanted his power to protect her husband. Kushina wanted his power to protect her home.

But Uzumaki Naruto, did not want his power. He turned away from it, not in fear nor revulsion, but because he _did not want it_. Because, quite simply, he was Uzumaki Fuckin' Naruto, Future Hokage of Konoha, and he would make his own path in the world.

So the Kyuubi respected him, the one who was unaffected by the lure of his power. He respected the boy, just as the boy respected the demon who took his family, his humanity, away. But it wasn't enough, not not enough, not yet. The child had to be tested, he had to be carefully witnessed, to the depths of his soul, if he was truly worthy of his great power, to become the only being since the Rikudo Sennin to wield the power of a _God_.

So tempt the child, the Kyuubi did. Tempt him, show him hate, fury, fear and ultimate, undeniable, unrivaled power. And if he could resist them... if he could take all the worst the Kyuubi could possibly throw at him...

"ALL! BETA-OMEGA THREE ON UZUMAKI! NOW!" Kakashi's cry came as he dashed at him and Uzumaki Naruto dove into his abundant chakra.

Beta-Omega, a maximum-priority battlefield command to initiate a maneuvre; _In the alloted time_ (Three)_ if you can get within the target location _(Uzumaki)_ go there and stay, otherwise, hunker down and pray for the Kamis to have mercy on your soul_. Admittedly, most made a double-take, but knowing Kakashi, and how laid-back the man normally was, every single Konoha ninja within range, ran to the blonde, the others taking refuge under anything they had at hand.

Enemy ninja all around smiled, at least those not familiar with Konoha's combat tactics; everyone had gathered around a single point, just asking for a single, big attack to take them all out!

Naruto's chakra seemed to seep into him from the world around him, perfectly, completely still. Not even breathing, barely heart beating, he called all his power to come to him.

The haze of chakra that surrounded him, didn't only cover his body, but it was large enough to create a bonfire surrounding all five dozen ninja that had landed next to him.

Then, with absolute rage in his voice, he passed judgement. **"Konoha ninpou... Ougi... SEN HA-KEN!"**

In an instant, all the leaves, that had been so conveniently ignored until then, became sharp, flying blades, whipping around a single point, tearing everything inside the techniques range to shreds like a single, large blender.

In seconds, there was no more green leaves around him.

There were red, fluttering and sticky leaves, a mist of blood and severed human pieces that spun around him.

Then the technique ended, letting the winds drop the mangled pieces of former people, now nothing more than minced meat.

"N-no w-way..."

"U-unbelievable..."

"W-what a jutsu..."

"G-gods... this is..."

"Naruto's most dangerous techniques." 'Shi's cold voice informed them. Kakashi couldn't take the vision of crimson death that had surrounded him, especially with his Sharingan activated. He had immidiately passed over to his alter ego. "Leaf ninja art, one thousand heaf blades... Naruto, can you continue?"

"Y-yeah, just gimme a moment and I'll be fine."

It was harder than it looked to even stand up, but he was fine, just not used to channeling this much power at once. But, as they say, there is no rest for the wicked, as a scream of terror drew his attention. "KYAAAAH!"

Hyuuga Hanabi had been looking forward to the Chuunin Exams, the last few times they had been held she had been forbidden from seeing them, but this time she had con(vi)n(c)ed hed father to take her along.

And what a show it had been! The blonde 'nobody' that her cousin mocked and despised, proved to be an extremely skilled ninja that Hanabi herself hoped to one day emulate or rival in power. He defeated, no, he _humilated_, her entire clan's style and showed the numerous weaknesses inside. As the future Head of Clan, she was supposed to learn that stuff, but no one ever taught her. Then there was the Suna vs. Konoha fight, where she saw tangible proof of how intellect can far outstrip power, so much unlike the spiel thrown at her by her Clan. Even the Uchiha, as much as she had been raised to hate his clan, was a sight to behold, strong, fast, talented and with great power in his hands.

Then things... degenerated. Thanks to her knocking out her father and elders like that, she was left alone in the stands. It wasn't a bad thing, in fact it was great, she could stretch out as much as she wanted, smile, look around and eat ice-cream.

The problem is, that Konoha had been betrayed. In an instant, a genjutsu came upon her, but she easily broke it, more an annoyance than anything.

Then... "ALL! BETA-OMEGA THREE ON UZUMAKI! NOW!" As the heir to Konoha's strongest and most noble clan, Hanabi was well aware of the most important protocols, she had known before even starting the Academy.

So, like a good little girl she was, she rolled under her seat until the danger would pass.

It was only thanks to her unique eyes that she realized _just how powerful_ that Uzumaki was. She saw chakra spill outwards, endlessly churned by him, as if he had no end, no limit! She saw it infuse leaves around him and extend outwards, lethal blades longer than her hand! She saw chakra flow along the ground, rise up and surround her in a protective dome! She saw the deluge of leaves, the whirlwind of blades, the destruction brought forth by the ninjutsu and she was in breathtaken awe as she beheld the lethal green weapons flood the place, and yet flow around her own little dome, sparing her their biting edge!

Shyly she dared poke her head out when it had ended, look down at the Hero who had brought down heavenly judgement with her own eyes...

Then a shadow fell and she turned to see a large man get up from behind cover.

"Kukuku... an unmarked Hyuuga... You'll fetch a good price, girlie, once I break you!" And he made to catch her.

Hyuuga Hanabi might have been the next Clan Head... but she was first and foremost a little girl and reacted just like how all little girls would react. "KYAAAAH!" She screamed.

The man laughed and approached her slowly as she scrambled back and away from him, as if he had all the time in the world, a large, prowling, deadly predator sure in his victory.

That is what Naruto saw and his blood inflamed with fury. There were few things he held sacred, Ramen, Orange and Log at the top, but children were pretty darn high up that list, he had suffered enough for everyone else to live comfortably. His chakra reacted to his will alone and activated his Kawarimi no Jutsu, bringing next to the man, mid-air.

Right kick to elbow, break the joint. Left kick to the temple, concussion. Right kick to the nose, broken and blinded. Flip and left heel drop on the top, nighty-night jackass!

Hanabi was still reeling back when the man attacking her was knocked out and she would have continued, had a somewhat familiar voice not shaken her out of her fear. "Hey, you alright there, Chibi-chan?"

Indignation, and gratitude, but mostly indignation, a reaction hammered into her reflexes. "I am not a chibi-chan! I'm Hyuuga Hanabi, heir to the Hyuuga Clan!" She replied angrily before she even realized she had, or more importantly to _who_ she had replied this way.

Naruto grinned at her cheek. So familiar. "Alright then, Chibi-jou-chan," He lightly teased her, grinning as she scowled at him, while he kneeled in front of her. "That creep didn't touch you did he? Good, care to catch a ride?" He turned his back to her to allow her to climb on him.

So she did. If anything, he was a genin of Konoha and he would be able to take care of her much better than she could protect herself. _'Hmm... this is definitely... different... from my clan...'_ She mulled as her hands caught strong, rough flesh, so much unlike her clan's own. She could feel the muscles clench and ripple under her fingers as she grabbed his shirt. _'Intriguing...'_ Well, she _had_ head some Hyuuga branch maidens speak highly of 'strong, hard muscles' when used in bed. Well, why would one use muscles in bed? After all, beds are a place of rest, not exertion so what use could they possibly have...

Soon however she had ducked her head behind the blond spiky mop on her savior's head to avoid the stinging wind as he leapt over the edge higher than she had ever gone. Then she grabbed him even tightly and squeaked in fear as several chuunin seemed to fall around them on the sand.

Naruto for his part was not that worried. No, he was both excited, _he was saving a princess darn it!_, and angry, he hadn't had time to repay that other bastard for his words.

"Die! Konoha ninja!" The ninja charged Naruto and his ward, kunai drawn.

But the Uzumaki wouldn't stop, nor would he so easily comply to their commands. Instead, he went through quick handseals, thanking the gods for Ero-sennin removing Oro-teme's seal, and channeled chakra to the seals in his hands.

Hanabi's eyes widened as she saw the moulded chakra cover his hands and unleash leaves from the little symbols in the wide sleeves, leaves that flowed over his forearms and extended outwards, enhanced with the blonde's favourite chakra blades. Then she felt her breath leave her lungs in a gasp as she looked downwards, at his feet and saw the layer of chakra between his feet and the ground.

"**Konoha Ninpo: Haken**!" Naruto declared before spreading his arms, one level with his head and the other with his knees (though it _was_ a rather short distance still). "And!" He made the layer of chakra under his feet, so much like water-walking but also like the destructive chakra-pulse he had taught Sasuke, only more sustained. These two abilities together actually nullified the friction between his sandals and the earth. _'I hope this works like I indend to, or I'm gonna look like an idiot...'_ Then he followed it with his 'evasive' jutsu, spinning himself like a top. "**Konoha Kenpuu (Leaf Bladed Wind)**!"

Hanabi fought to keep her stomach down, the spin had been wild, strong and fast, round and round they had gone, moving forward, like a moving tornado. _'If _that's_ how the Kaiten feels like, I won't be learning it, thank you.'_

Kakashi had seen his student surrounded by nearly half-a-dozen ninja and had moved to help, but he soon stopped that in favour of gaping. What was it with his student stealing everyone's jutsu and turning it to new avenues? No, seriously! That's annoying, why doesn't his blonde student leave something for him to adapt! His sharingan easily showed how the chakra flowed, the leaf swords extending to their full whip-length and then him spinning, the cut wind making a deep, repeating sound, as he lashed all around him, causing blood to fly around.

"Wahoo-ttebayo!" Naruto hollered, euphoric from the endorphins that had flooded his system. "Oh shit!" He dodged to the right quickly, seeing a large fist come his way. A fist covered in a thick layer of mud, belonging to a man that made Geji-mayu-sensei look tiny in comparison. "Err... Kakashi-sensei? Some help?"

"Kinda busy here, Naruto! Stay away from him!" Kakashi replied, cursing at the uncanny cooperation these ninja seemed to have, or just their plain tenacity at wanting to kill him. They didn't even think about it; they just tried to tackle him to the ground! No witty banter, no women in short skirts, no declarations of eternal enmity over a stolen bowl of rice, where's the shinobi world going to?

But Naruto was never known to be one to respect orders. Especially when orders seem, to him, stupid or pointless. So, instead of backing away, like any _sane_ person would, he broke one Haken down and threw the leaf blades at his enemy. When the man laughed, that's when he realized the purpose of that heavy mud armor; it protected him from attacks so, unless he could hit the eyes, the man was pretty damn near invulnerable as Earth didn't have a weakness over Wind.

"Hah! Your pathetic leaves cannot hurt me! My jutsu renders me immune to weak attacks like yours, puny genin!"

Dodging back from a powerful if slow fist, Naruto grinned as an idea hit him. Well, more like remembered the old adage 'the bigger they are, the harder they fall'. And like all things, the blonde nutcase decided to take it _literally_. "Pity there ain't no jutsu to actually make you smarter, baaaka!" He poked his tongue out as he re-activated his spent Haken. The man scowled and charged him, just as planned, for at the last instant, he replaced himself with one of the leaves he had attacked him with and, before the earth-covered nin had time to turn around, he had attacked with both leaf whips.

"Is that the best you can do?" The man mocked as he somehow managed to turn enough to raise one hand in defence, grinning as his armor didn't even seem scratched. "I ain't scared of some lil' tree hugger like you, boy! Once this fight's over, I'm gonna watch this whole damn forest burn!"

If anything, that just solidified Naruto's desire to kick his ass. "That's why you're a baka; this ain't over yet! **Konoha Ninpo: Haken: Konoha Shibari (Leaf Ninja Art: Leaf Sword: Leaf Restraint)**!" He shouted, unleashing more and more leaves from his seals and having them flow from his arms to his whips and then over his enemy, wrapping him in a coccoon of leaves.

"Wh-what?" This was asked by both the ninja and Hanabi, though for different reasons. The ninja was surprised by the leaves but the Hyuuga princess was more surprised by the chakra she saw Naruto send to the ground. _'This looks like roots... Anchoring? He's anchoring himself but why... Unless... No! Not even he could-!'_ "T-That's impossible!" She cried out, only barely catching his smirk. "No matter how strong you are, you can't possibly be thinking you could-!"

"Hah! This Uzumaki Naruto knows not the meaning of the word 'impossible', dattebayo!" He grinned in his obnoxious way and then, as the ninja asked him what he was going to do, he _pulled_. Muscles that had coursed with Kyuubi's power since his birth were flooded by human chakra, instinctively using it to copy the feats demonic chakra would allow them to and Naruto... Naruto pulled. "Gn... Gnn!" He grunted, but slowly at first and then faster, the man was pulled off his feet. "GNNNN!" The chakra anchoring kept his feet firmly on the ground, but that didn't go for the other ninja.

_'No... no way! He's... That man must weigh a ton and he's...'_

"Round and round it goes, and it's fate nobody knows!" Naruto whooped as he spun, faster and faster, still grunting occasionally as he strained, both chakra and body, to keep it up. "Take a HIKE!" He commanded, letting go of the Hakken, launching the man upwards, flying over several battles. "**Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!**" Strained hands quickly made the cross-seal, creating a dozen clones to appear and almost instantly poof away, leaving floating leaves behind.

The mud-ninja was trying to break free of the restraint; it was weakening but not letting up just yet. Still, he would be fine, even if he fell head first, his armor would take the brunt of the attack.

That's when a dozen shadows fell over him and he saw just as many clones making a single hand-seal; Dragon. The hands then touched his body and, as one, the clones called out a single jutsu; "**Fuuton: SHOU (Wind Style: Push)!**"

Fuuton: Shou isn't a strong ninjutsu. In fact, it is so weak that it's not even considered a proper fuuton, all it does is shove something, one of the lowest D-rank jutsu, more used to fan oneself during heatstrokes or knock that annoying cookie jar off the shelf. But, when it is used a dozen times with enough chakra each to overpower even a C-rank jutsu, then even something as weak as that can become dangerous.

Twelve thrusts, all directed in one point, straight down. "Returned to sender, dattebayo!" The clones cried as they thrusted their target down at break-neck speeds, reaching and breaking through terminal velocity in an instant.

**BOOOOM!**

The meteor impacted on the hard earth, the shockwave and dust throwing a smokescreen over half the arena and, when it cleared, a man laid broken inside a crater, twelve puffs of smoke only signifying that his fall had taken less than a second to come down from almost thirty feet in the air.

Kakashi sighed and shook his head. That's seriously just like his blonde student... Trust Naruto to overpower a simple D-rank enough to make it lethal; the man's armor might be tough, but concussive force is transferred through contact. With it being in contact with his skin meant that, even if the mud absorbed a lot of the force, it was still enough to break his spine from the fall.

Up in the arena, several genin and chuunin were defending a small area, improptu set up to defend noncombatants. Expectedly, Ino was already there, trying (and failing) to hide her shakes and look threatening. "N-Naruto!" She cried out instead of a greeting. "Come here, quickly, take cover!"

"No can do, Ino-chan." Even in the heat of battle, the affectionate suffix almost made her blush, but she quickly overcame that urge. "Take care of Chibi-jou-chan for me, please." He said, handing over a pouting Hanabi.

"No! I am Hyuuga Hanabi, heir to the noble Clan of Hyuuga! I wish to fight!" All her seriousness however vanished when Ino squeed at the little girl and glomped her.

"So cuute!" She squealed. "Stay here with me and Narut- hey, Naruto!" But the blonde had already gone from the safety and landed back into the blood-spattered sand.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto called out as he ran next to his teacher in a lull of the fight. Apparently, people actually _could_ learn not to approach a man who killed their friends with a handkerchief and a smile on (what they could see of) his face. "Anything I can do to help?" He offered, knowing how to defer to his superior.

Kakashi actually grinned at his student, but he wiped a bit of sweat off his forehead as well. "Not that much I'm afraid. We've almost cleared the arena, the civilians have left, there's only the matter of the village." He paused to point out, towards the gates, to show the smoke rising from there. "They've breached the walls. Saw a few giant snakes, summons more than likely, and many others have just barged in... There's war going on in every single street of Konoha, but there's not-"

"I'll do it." Naruto interrupted his sensei. "I'll do it, Kakashi-sensei. I'll protect them, I'll protect everyone." He gave a grin to his stunned teacher, ignoring all the ninja that were now looking at him too. "After all, I'm gonna be the Hokage, right? Can't let anyone hurt my village!" So he crossed his fingers and pulled out every single last dredge of chakra his body could produce. "**Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!**" Hundreds, maybe even thousands of clones spaned from the roiling mass of smoke, leaping on everything they could find. Walls, poles, wires, seats, windows, ceilings, everywhere was covered by a veritable sea of blonde hair, blue eyes and camouflage-green.

"Kakashi-sensei... Take care of everyone for me, alright?"

"Naruto what are you-" He made to say, his Kakashi persona coming out for a second, before retreating. One look at the boy's eyes had been enough. "Do it. Good luck, soldier. Genma! Aoba! Defencive formation Delta-Two around Uzumaki!"

Naruto sent one hand behind his back and into his ninja tool pouch, pulling out a large, grape-like fruit. In one movement, sudden and sharp, so he couldn't regret it, he ate it, chewing quickly and gulping it down.

The change was instant; Naruto's eyes dilated, his breathing peaked and his skin reddened as veins popped.

**"Konoha ninpou... Ougi... Mori Yuurei Guntai(Leaf Ninja Final Art: Forest Ghost Army)!"**

A pulse of chakra rushed outwards, covering the entire village.

In every house, in every garden and every park, in every tree and every flower... Leaves, long and short, slender and thick, fresh-green or old-brown, all responded at once at Naruto's call to arms.

A deluge of leaves, flowed through every street, stopping all fights in an instant. Combatants, intruders and defenders alike, looked around for a reason to this event.

In the arena, the clones vanished.

Before an ANBU, three clones leapt onto his target, punching with a speed he could barely follow as they popped from side to side.

In the Academy, leaves turned to ropes and pulled the intruders out, where they were beaten repeatedly.

A running civilian tripped and fell, looking back in terror to see the murdering psychopath leap at him... Only to be tackled by a dozen people, all identical, before being beaten to a bloody pulp.

Everywhere in the village, Naruto's clones fought tooth and nail, vanishing and appearing, hitting their enemies upwards where they would appear on their backs for a heeldrop, then appearing on their faces for an uppercut, then right over them for a downwards kick, hitting them over and over again in an unbreakable chain of violence.

One invader in particular chose to attack nothing more than a small ramen stand. Well, there was that cute waitress and her grizzled old father. To the victor go the spoils huh? Besides, Orochimaru-sama did promise them their choice of gains, if they won it. So he tore down the entrance with a small wind jutsu, a pre-emptive strike to let them know just who they were messing with.

Unfortunately for him, neither Ayame nor Teuchi were the stereotypical cowardly civilians he had been expecting. The older man had served shinobi for generations, he had learned to handle his butcher knife better than most chuunin. And the girl, she was like a demon possessed! Her steel ladle blocked, parried and struck like it were a snake! So, he got serious; no matter how skilled a civilian is, they are no match for a trained ninja!

Ayame collided with the fridge and fell on her father, the kick had felt like it bruised some bones. Teuchi on the other hand just cursed as he tried to get up. "I'm getting too old for this shit... Hey!" Suddenly he seemed hostile. "Leave the ramen alone!" The ninja had kicked aside the soup pot, spilling the wonderful ramen broth to the ground, but most importantly, he was taking Naruto's 'Uzumaki-style, Kage-Level, Super-Ultra Ramen of Deliciousness'! Ramen specifically prepared to honor The Ramen after Naruto won in the exams! To touch that bowl was sacrilege!

"Hah, or what? You're gonna hit me, civilian?" The man mocked and then laughed at Teuchi's comment that The Ramen would repay his heathen actions.

"Put... the Ramen... down... _slowly_..." A _very_ hostile voice came from the entrance, the figure concealed by the light, making a large shadow fall inside and the Ichiraku's smile at their saviour. "In the name of the Trinity, I shall punish you!"

It was a midget. A midget in weird brown-green colored clothes. "Psch, you? Right, I'm scared. But if you want them so much, here, catch!" And the ninja tossed the ramen to the side!

"NO!" Came Naruto's voice as he dove, desperately, trying with all his might to catch the divine ramen bowl before it hit the ground but-! "NOOO! MY RAMEEEEN!" It slipped his fingers, falling to the ground and... _shattering_... the sound echoing many times over like the sound of his own broken heart and dreams, the world itself now falling apart as the Heavenly Ramen were defiled and destroyed... "No... Not my Ramen... No... please... please come back to me... No... NoOOOooo!"

"What are you, an idiot, blondie?" The man mocked, not quite aware of the crazy look that now was on Naruto's face. "So what's about the ramen, it's just crap anyway, too salty, too tasteless! I think, I think I'm going to burn this place to the ground, actually! Mwahaha!"

"You... destroyed... my... ramen... You... defiled their name..." Now Naruto had gotten up off the ground and turned a baleful glare at the man, blue eyes alight with malice. "I'm going to make you pay!" Chakra spilled out as Naruto took a peculiar stance, one that put all his muscles to display, a mighty flex. "**GALAXY... ENEMAAAAA!**"

There was a bright flash of light, blinding Teuchi and Ayame, but they could still hear the pained shouts, the calls for mercy as they prayed to the Ramen to be spared judgement for failing to protect its Glory.

"NO! NO! THAT DOESN'T GO THERE!"

"AND INDEED IT DOES!" Naruto's voice was positively filled with joyous malice. "By the time I'm done with you, I'll have _redifined the limits of anatomy_! TAKE THIS! SENNEN GOROSHI- EXPLODING KUNAI VERSIOOON!"

A clone however was selected for a very particular job. Instead of running, he chained many replacements together, all to get him to a specific place as fast as possible. Slingshoting on a house, he vanished again and again, appearing for only an instant, on a pole, a cart, over a kunai, on a hedge and over a wooden wall that seemed to barricade a place near the Wall.

Even after landing, he didn't stop, instead immidiately launching on a fast run, until he came to a clearing. Across him, a woman, dark skinned with hair and eyes as black as night and a long, silk, semi-transparent gown was sitting on a throne made of a large, deep red, flower.

"My King... You come. Not in person though... Why? What goes one behind our kind's walls?" She asked in a calm though authoritative voice.

"Bereth en Taure, my Queen of Thorns," He spoke as he landed, smiling at her just like he did every time he laid eyes on her. "Konoha, my village, is under attack, foreign shinobi are attacking, killing and destroying!" He took a few moments to re-center himself. "I... you can interfere, go, defend our forests, but _do not be seen_! Attack them while they get ready to attack, they... you can do with them what you will, but remain unseen! Titania-chan, could you help?"

The small fairy popped up from under his spiky locks, somehow having snuck in there. "Sure! Can I mess with Konoha ninja too, if they don't see me? I'll be nice!" Her grin was not all that reassuring though.

"No, not now. Wait until the fight's over and then... then as long as it doesn't hurt them, you're free to do whatever you want, as long as you remain hidden! All of you, must remain hidden, until I can... until people won't hate you, you must hide! I... If they try to hurt you, I don't know what I'd do..."

The Queen's arms embraced him, having moved with inhuman grace before he even realized it, and she held him tight. "Do not worry for us, my King, we can protect ourselves. Now, go, do your duty. We will handle this."

And so the dryads did. Assembling their Thornstrikers, they left their grove to fight, to protect their home, a home that would hate them had they known of their existence, but their home nonetheless. Dryads, wearing light armor made of wood that covered their limbs and torso, bearing silver tiaras made out of special flowers, gathered their weapons. Thornswords they could extend to become whips. Vinebows with sharp, pointy ends they could use as a staff or spear. Light, wooden shields they carried on their backs, able to deflect even Naruto's own cutting leaves. Spores and seeds of dangerous plants they could have take root and grow within moments. At their head, their Queen herself, the oldest, strongest dryad of them all, Bereth en Taure, whose silver flower trimmings on her gown had grown to armor, bracers and greaves, her hand holding her thorny whip tightly.

The dryad grove moved out, some slinking into trees and others melding into the shadows of their groves, moving with a grace that kunoichi would give their right arms for, eyes and ears not their only senses into the Forest, where the Life's Heartbeat beat ever stronger.

Ninja, Suna and Oto together, sat in a circle, scrolls in their hands and symbols on the ground. They were on 'summoning duty', they would use the scrolls provided to them by the being known as Orochimaru to change the battle.

They never got the chance.

Three guards fell to fleet arrows, streaking from above with nary a sound, deep into their flesh and bone, collapsing with the merest gasp of pain.

Bereth en Taure led the charge, in front of her dryad sisters, and she moved like a ghost. A strong jump brought her between two unsuspecting summoners and her whip slashed the first one's eyes in a seamless motion, all the while her long legs wrapped around the other one in a suffocation hold. A hand touched the ground and grass came alive wrapping the two men in hard coccoons, keeping them down and ready for transport. Her rosethorn whip slithered as if alive, wrapping the legs and arms of two other men that tried to recover and, with a strength her slight frame easily hid, she flipped them over, once again calling on the living grass to contain them. A ninja came from behind her, short sword at the ready to stab at her, but she flowed with unearthly grace around his strike and flush onto his body. "If you wanted to impale me so _hard_, you should at _least_ wear less clothing." She teased and, in the moment of surprise, blew some air at him, air that carried a powerful anaesthetic, knocking him out in a second.

All around the queen, the fight was already over, the thornstrikers had abstained from killing as much as they could, but there was still some blood staining the clearing. The Queen smiled, they would eat well tonight. If they restrained themselves, the flesh would sustain them for a few months, definitely lighten the load on her poor King's meager resources. "Wrap them and take them with us. We have protected our home. Our duty is done, now we feast!" Female cheers came from the assembled dryads. While they were not what one would call avid meat-eaters, they _did_ require it, and their Maker _was_ running low on his resources. Why he never allowed them to harvest some of the people in the village that hated him, she would never understand.

With the summoners unable to assist the attack and other intruders falling to many of the Greenborn's traps, it quickly became obvious that Konoha stood stronger than Suna and Oto had believed. When the last loyal member of the legendary Sannin, an old pervert named Jiraiya, arrived atop a group of three larger-than-life, pissed-off, toads, the fight was taken right out of any enemy of Konoha.

Konoha's invasion had ended in a crushing victory for those who wore the Leaf. It was not bloodless, it was not painless, but it was also not a pyrrhic victory.

In fact, if anyone had a say, they would state that it was all due to the actions of a single boy, a boy that almost all of Konoha had isolated out of fear and hate. But now, not even the most jaded merchant, not even the most terrified parent could say that the boy was nothing but the beast inside him, not when many had their lives saved, literally torn from the teeth of the Shinigami in many cases, by the blonde. No, no one who would fight tooth and nail for people he didn't know, could be a mindless, evil monster. Maybe, _just maybe_, he wasn't the monster he kept inside, maybe, _just maybe_, he had suffered, just like them. Maybe, _just maybe_, they should actually start treating him like a human being.

None were more surprised to look at him than a pair of recently reconciliated Hyuuga's. Hinata had been still sobbing into her cousin's chest when ninja entered the infirmary.

Both Hyuuga clanspeople were quite surprised, to say the least; Neji was supposed to still be recovering and Hinata had told her watchers to leave her. That and the door wasn't opened, it was kicked open, and a pair of ninja entered the room, weapons drtawn.

Seeing her cousin was unable to fight, Hinata got off him and quickly placed herself between the intruders and him, shaking in the inside but calm on the outside. "A-ano... Wh-what do you w-want?" She cursed her stutter once more, how could she project confidence when she stutters like that? Well, not that she _was_ confident, but she couldn't even fake it.

"Oh? What do we have here? A Hyuuga, unsealed too! Heh, you'll be a good gift to Orochimaru-sama. I mean, that jerk Kagutsuchi, he always breaks them before we get any experimenting done... Then again, young and weak is his weakness, kukuku... Me, I prefer more full ones!" The musical note on his forehead glinted but Hinata paid it no heed.

"Little on- No! Hanabi-chan!" She gasped, terrified. Then, something within her awoke, the protective instinct that prevented her from ever attacking anyone before. "You won't touch Hanabi-chan!" Three quick steps forward brought her between the two men before they even realized she had even moved, such was the fluidity of her motion that it seemed like she floated rather than walk.

Her next instant had Neji gaping at his cousin, he had never seen her attack anyone, much less in such a way! In the blink of an eye, she had spin on the balls of her right foot and, with a movement that spoke of undeniable grace, managed to land her right palm on the throat of the man on the left and her left heel slam on the forehead of the man on the right. _'Since when Hinata was that flexible? No wonder she can't use the traditional Jyuken form, it is obviously too rigid for her body...'_

As if that wasn't enough however, Neji was forced to quickly throw off his covers and move to his cousin. He would be too slow, he knew, but he had to save her. Because there were another two attackers coming.

Hinata was already face to face with the second one, an Oto kunoichi with a vicious scar on her face and a pair of gauntlets with many tubes on them. The woman snarled viciously at the girl in front of her. "You little bitch! Take this: **Ninpo: Kuran (Ninja Art: Kunai Storm)**!" She said, putting both hands in front of her so that her gauntlets made a circular shape, tubes pointing at Hinata.

Only they were no normal tubes, but kunai launchers, which were swiftly activated, sending a bunch of steel-black weapons, all linked with ninja wires, both together and with the launchers themselves, straight at Hinata.

But the meek girl did not waver, her eyes having predicted what would happen and her body's reflexes moving her before the weapons were even out. Hinata moved with such grace that she seemed to leave afterimages behind her as she stood on one leg, hands moving like a windmill, then falling almost horizontal to the ground, well under the line of fire, before getting back up on the other side of the stream of the weapons, which had long since gone over her. Hinata did not stop there, however. She kept on her movement, wrapping her arms around the wires, bunching them all together and then spinning, wrapping them around her body, diagonally over her chest, around her waist and, raising a leg far higher than a kimono should allow to, around her calf and thigh, pulling the surprised kunoichi towards her.

A chakra-charged palm ended the movement in an instant, followed closely by the dull 'thud' of a falling body and the wet coughs of a chocking Hinata, who had overexerted herself too much already.

Neji was next to her already though and, with a single hand, stopped the attacker's kunai in place. He glared at the attacker, feeling the shame at his betrayal of his own family turn into fury guided to the defence of the same. "Rest now, Hinata-sama. I shall take out the trash." And with that, he sent a pulse of chakra to his hand and into the man's arm, guiding it through the chakra circulation system and into the man's lungs, causing them to seize up and knock him unconscious in mere seconds.

The two reconciled Hyuuga walked, or rather limped, out of the infirmary, just in time to witness Naruto spinning like a top, whips made of green leaves in his hand, with a precious, _so precious_, cargo on his back. Moments later, Neji would laugh loudly, wondering how the hell he had thought he could defeat a person with _village-wide ninjutsu_ and the chakra to actually use them without dieing of exhaustion.

Tenten did indeed hear something that sounded as improbable as Neji laughing, but she thought little of it, busy as she was to avoid blades of wind, distorting sound waves, kunai, fireballs, explosive tags and fists that were seeking her out. Weapons on her hands, she was fighting as best as she could, taking potshots as often as the ANBU team around her allowed her to, but she was getting fed up. "Alright! That's it! You want to throw kunai, lemme show you how it's done!" Eyes alight with dangerous fury, she leapt straight up and over the battlefield, over the roofs that the attackers had entrenched themselves. Three scrolls were removed from their holsters and unfolded, making three complete circles around the floating girl before they began spinning and rotating all around her, meshing with each other only to separate an instant later. "**Zanryuu Kokukou (Blade Dragon Black Cry)**!" She cried out before it started raining pointy, edged or smashing weapons of war.

Kunai, senbon, kama, kusari-gama, ninjatou, long swords, broad swords, hammers, tetsubo, even just randomly shaped masses of metal, all rained down with great force, ripping through the hasty-put defences and opening up the way for the ANBU to finally move in and take care of the stragglers.

"Nice going there, girl, but now you're useless, it would take too long to reseal them, better sit the rest out." An ANBU in bear mask told her, but Tenten would have none of that foolishness.

"Oh yeah? How about you take another look!" She snapped, rather put out by everyone looking down on her for being a weapons user and a kunoichi. Her hands had already been placed on a specific part of each scroll, activating the seal placed there. Poofs of smoke littered the battlefield and suddenly the sealing scroll was being filled. "What? It takes so long to reseal them manually that I wouldn't have had any time to practice! I just invested in sympathy-linking seals to connect the scroll with all my weapons. It takes a bit of chakra, but it sure saves me time, do you know how much of a bitch it is to gather _three hundred weapons_ and sort them out properly?" Tenten sighed sadly however, how she wished that Jiraiya-sama would have spent some more time teaching her about seals. She could feel her breakthrough approaching, just a little bit more and she could have completed her Shuukei: Senjo (Endscape: Battlefield) technique.

Ah well, she could always track him down afterwards, he did, after all, give her a bunch of books and scrolls to read on magnetic and connection seals. Maybe it was in there somewhere, the secret she was looking for.

But for now she would be content in actually managing to hit that annoying girl! Seriously, how can she bend that way? If _she_ could bend that way then... Tenten stopped that train of thought before she developed a nosebleed. Instead she chose to abandon the twin wakizashi she was using in favour of a less orthodox weapon.

She called it 'Mangetsu Shiken', meaning 'Four Blades of the Full Moon', and it was one of her newer toys, courtesy of the mad weaponsmith Ioh. It was made of a long chain ending in a bladed head. The head itself was round with a hole in the middle where the chain connected, as well as a pair of handles in case she needed to hold it in hand. Around the circular head, there were four, large, curved blades. The chain's other side ended in a spiked brass knuckle that could also double as a weight, having a small release with a spike on the other end of the grip.

The Mangetsu Shiken, or Mangetsu for short, was definitely an oddball of a weapon, used much like how one fought with a kusari-gama, but also very, very different, as Tenten utilized her own body to create leverage and change its movements sharply and unpredictably. "Take this!" She cried out spinning it first over head and then launching Mangetsu out, taking note when the woman leapt up and to the side, already having taken a few steps forward and spinning herself so as to wrap it around, abruptly changing the blade's direction.

And yet again, however, her adversary managed to dodge, if by the skin of her teeth, and a little bit of fabric too Tenten noticed. Over and over Tenten spun, winding and unwinding her chained weapon, lashing out with kicks on the chain, deflecting thrown weapons at the same time as preparing for an attack, steadily pushing back but still unable to land a decisive blow.

To the ANBU that had the awareness to see the fight, the chain seemed to flow with a snake-like quality, snapping angrily, coiling defencively and flowing swiftly, as a gennin, _a gennin_, danced against a chuunin. Sure, it was an Oto chuunin so she couldn't be expected to be at the level of the Five Great Shinobi Villages, but it was still damn impressive, especially considering the fact that the intruder was also focused in her taijutsu.

Finally, a chance, Tenten grinned as she drew her weapon back for another attack, her target having ended up under a large balcony. Spinning quickly, with the chain wrapped around her right arm like a twisting bandana, she quickly went through the few handseals of the single jutsu Naruto managed to fully teach her the month previous. Then, before the technique's result was apparent, she lashed out with Mangetsu, the bladed head making a bee-line for her target.

Predictably, she dodged. Just as predictably, Tenten's grin became predatorial. "Gotcha, bitch! **Ninpo: Shuriken Kage Bunshin no Jutsu (Ninja Art: Shuriken Shadow Clone Technique)**!" Though a derivative of the Shadow Clone, the B-rank jutsu can be lethal in proper hands, as demonstrated by Tenten. Just as the blade snapped at the edge, a few meters away from her intended target, several copies of the shuriken-like head phased into existence, continuing the arc of the flight.

"And that should teach you not to look down on weapon users." Tenten finished, looking rather smug, standing over her defeating, bleeding enemy. The shuriken clones had almost cut the woman apart, as she had been too surprised by the fact that the weapon reached outside its maximum established 'reach zone', too late to react and avoid getting slashed.

Konoha's upcoming Weapons Mistress looked at the nearby ANBU unit, basking in the concealed respect she could feel coming from them, and leapt off, away from the Arena. The roar of a demon sounded over Konoha and her greatest warrior was locked in single combat with an unknown assailant, the deluge of leaves, and its following clones, having done much to lighten the load of Konoha's defenders, but it wasn't over. The fight was _far_ from over.

In a clearing, just outside the village, Sasuke stared down the demon, now free. "Damn you... Let her free, you bastard!" He cried out, chakra swirling like flames around him, glaring impotently at the red-headed psychopath. A mark in the shape of three tomoes pulsed and the raven-haired boy ground his teeth as he tried to suppress his rage.

**A/N: As I did in Proto-Naruto, the Invasion will take place in two, separate chapters. This chapter is focused mostly on Naruto and the early parts of Sarutobi's fight. The next one will be on Sasuke and the rest of the old man's fight.**

**To those who took notice of the Kyuubi's thoughts on Mito and Kushina; the two women were not evil or corrupted. But, they took his power and they used it. Admittedly, it was for a good cause, but they fell to the lure of his great power, much easier to gain than any other. Because of that, while Kyuubi respected them as Kunoichi and as warriors, he did not respect them as 'beings', he did not see them as equals because they took power he did not offer them. That is why neither of them really synchronized with him, really **_**cooperated**_** with him. But Naruto is different; he knows he has Kyuubi's power, he knows it's there, he knows he can call on it. But he refuses to, he refuses to take the easy way out. And even when he **_**did**_** call on this power, and Kyuubi is quite well aware it was unintentional and unwanted, therefore it is not hypocritical of Naruto to deny Kyuubi's power now, he still did not succumb to the demon's hate, he still took no life and was able to show compassion even to those who , by all claims, deserved death. That is why the Kyuubi respects the blonde and sees that maybe, just maybe, there is some hope for humans out there. And before anyone starts screaming; no Kushina was **_**never**_** implied to have gained Kyuubi's power, only the 'red shroud' as it were, she **_**never**_** gained the level of control canon!Naruto now has. I've read all chapters and it is never stated. In fact, if anything, Naruto is the only one to have gained full control over Kyuubi.**

**Anyway, on Hanabi; she's a **_**little girl**_**, for crying out loud. She doesn't know about sex, she just knows that 'two people that are married make children (somehow) that have traits from both parents' and 'arranged marriages can be used to broker peace or treaties and gain advantages over rivals'. She might **_**sound**_** like she has a plan, but, like she wondered in this chapter; she still believes that beds are a place of rest **_**only**_**. Cut the girl some slack, she even said that it could be either her or Hinata to enter the marriage contract, but Hinata is still the Hyuuga Heir, they can't give her up.**

**Also, I know that Naruto might seem overpowered in this chapter, but he's really not; he made two **_**thousand**_** clones to fight Gaara, after getting beaten around and having his entire chakra system shut down. He **_**then**_** had enough chakra left to summon **_**Gamabunta**_**. I don't think I made him that much more chakra-spending than he is in cannon, just using his reserves better. Finally, as you can see, the Greenborn are not appearing just yet. It will come later, but for now, no one knows about them (except Jiraiya and that's in Omake only, not the 'canon' fic). Sandaime doesn't know of them, neither does Kakashi or Danzo or anyone else. They will be revealed in time. But we **_**did**_** get to see the Queen in action :D**

**Jutsu Descriptions:**

**Konoha Kenpuu (Leaf Bladed Wind)**

**Cost: C, Control: C, Rank: C, Classification: Taijutsu/Ninjutsu, Alignment: Wind (basic)**

**A rather simple technique, despite its quite devastating effects. The user creates a 'disc' of chakra between his feet and the ground, nullifying friction, and expels chakra from his calves, allowing him to spin. Weapons are not provided by the technique, so one must draw or create them from before. In this version, the user's spinning movements are coupled with two weapons held at different heights to minimize the chances of dodging. However, due to inertia, weapon length is reduced to less than 75%, or even 50% if it is a flexible weapon.**

**Konoha Ninpou Ougi: Mori Yuurei Guntai (Leaf Ninja Final Art: Forest Ghost Army)**

**Cost: A to S, Control: B, Rank: A to S, Classification: Ninjutsu (Forbidden), Alignment: Wind (basic)**

**The upgraded, more devastating form of Mori Yuurei, upgraded to work on a village-wide or battlefield-wide scale. The user first utilizes the Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu (an A ranked jutsu on its own) to create a large amount of clones. Then, using the Kawarimi no Jutsu in conjunction with a much larger than usual Konohagakure no Jutsu, the clones attack, using leaves as replacements to avoid damage and attack from better positions. The strain of the jutsu is so great that the user has to stay immobile and completely defenceless to focus on maintaining the technique, and even then it lacks the grace of the usual Mori Yuurei, as the leaves and clones are simply so many that the user cannot coordinate them as well; he must create patterns through which the clones will move, as it is impossible for the brain to simultaneously calculate for thousands of clones and tens of thousands of leaves and their possible combinations. Use of this jutsu for more than a few moments can and will lead to brain damage from the strain.**

**Fuuton: Shou (Wind Style: Push)**

**Cost: D, Control: D, Rank: D, Classification: Ninjutsu, Alignment: Wind (basic)**

**One of the lowest possible wind jutsu one can learn, it is so useless that few ever think of using it in combat, at best it can push a shuriken to reach maximum velocity faster. The jutsu does nothing more than project a wind blast to push something like a hand, but having little actual accuracy in doing that even, usually requiring a target bigger than a shuriken to be at least partially accurate. It is so weak that Suna children often use it to push cookie jars off the shelves or ruffle each other in hot days.**

**Ninpo: Kuran (Ninja Art: Kunai Storm)**

**Cost: D, Control: D, Rank: C, Classification: Bukijutsu, Alignment: None**

**A simple, yet very dangerous in close range, technique, the Kuran utilizes specially prepared kunai launchers and simultaneously activates them when the target is in close range. Even a tough opponent will take serious damage when hit by more than three dozen kunai. Additionally, all kunai are lined with ninja wires, both to the launchers and to each other, creating a web-like pattern that can entrap an enemy who managed to survive the attack, lining them up for following techniques.**

**Zanryuu Kokukou (Blade Dragon Black Cry)**

**Cost: C, Control: C, Rank: C, Classification: Bukijutsu, Alignment: None**

**When it comes to sheer number of attacks per second, few techniques come close to the Soushouryuu, but this one overcomes even that one. Three scrolls filled to the brim with weapons of all types, the user spins and rotates the scrolls around herself in all axis', creating a full field of attack, in all three dimensions. Thanks to upgraded seals, the weapons can be launched with great force, without requiring manual help to throw (though that can be cancelled at will for precision strikes). The technique's accuracy is low, only able to attack in relative cones, but the weapons are simply so many, that there is no chance of evasion. All weapons are linked to the user's hands with special ninja wires as well as special seals to instantly restore them back into their storage scroll. The jutsu serves as the basis of Shuukei: Senjo (Endscape: Battlefield).**

**Ninpo: Shuriken Kage Bunshin no Jutsu (Ninja Art: Shuriken Shadow Clone Technique)**

**Cost: C, Control: C, Rank: C, Classification: Ninjutsu, Alignment: None**

**A derivative of the Shadow Clone technique, this one is much easier to use, but also far more straightforward. Instead of a clone of the user, this technique clones a thrown weapon, also allowing the clones to move with the same speed, in the same direction as well, though experienced or skilled users can also alter not only the direction of the thrown clones, but also their velocity as well as initial location, making it ideal for a user who wants to either corral an enemy to a single location or finish a fight with a swarm of otherwise nonlethal weaponry.**

**OMAKE CORNER:**

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouse Scene Four**

Suna and Oto shinobi broke down the doors to the warehouse. It was big, therefore it had lots to pillage and plunder.

However, no crates of goods or stacked precious items greeted them. Instead, at the very center of the building, as if in a place to be seen by all, stood the most beautiful plant any mortal could ever see. Its flowers were like roses, with numerous petals surrounding a precious core, yet the petals themselves were longer and sleeker, seemingly possessing of unearthly grace. Its colors were vibrant and passionate, red that reminded of love, blue that brought back memories of free running, pink like the blush of your first crush and white so pure it seemed to be solid light. Its leaves moved to the wind and filled the place with a hauntingly beautiful melody, a song that made life seem so much more innocent and happy. The flowers that moved sounded like silver tinkling bells, the giggle of a happy child.

But the hearts of these intruders had no room for light; there was nothing to pillage and plunder, so they became angry. A simple jutsu torched the tree and a wind followup tore it apart.

While the intruders raged and raved for there was nothing to _pillage and plunder_, something awoke in the plants of that warehouse.

The Rainbow, as it was often called by them, was like their goddess, their mother, it was their hope, what they all aspired to be. So beautiful, so pure, so... _perfect_.

The plants became angry. Their friend, their most precious friend beside The Maker was gone.

The Rainbow would never shine again or sing again or help them grow.

But of all the plants, the fungi were the most angry of them all. They, the lowly, _ugly_, fungi were the most angered. They knew they would never be as beautiful. They knew it, but they felt no envy to the magnificent Rainbow. They had only felt happiness it was there, with them.

And now it was gone. Burned and killed.

Some of the fungi decided to take things into their own hands.

Burning red dots, reminiscent of eyes, glared from the shadows.

As the intruding ninja began to file out of the building dissapointed, they heard several heavy footsteps come from behind them.

They didn't make it to the exit, they only managed to scream in terror and pain.

Moments later, green-skinned humanoids marched out of the warehouse, gardening tools fashioned into crude weaponry. They saw the destruction around them and more of the intruding, Rainbow-killing, ninja.

Their arms rose into the air and they bellowed their first word, or battle cry.

**"WAAAGH!"**

**Summoning Attempt No. 1:**

"Just watch Ero-sennin! I'll find a way to summon my pretties even without your help!"

"Oh yeah, I'd love to see that brat!" The older man snarked at his student, amused.

"Behold! The Flute of Signs!" Naruto cried out as he retrieved a long flute from... somewhere. "Behold the awesome power of the Hand of Flora!" He raised it high in the air, making a slash! "Green!" Another slash! "Green!" And yet again! "GREEN!" And a final high raising, both hands into the air as the Flute of Signs glowed with power! "GREENBORN! HOOOOO!"

A spotlight fell on Naruto...

The two ninja waited, and waited and waited some more.

"Aww, damn, they sold me an imitation!" Naruto tossed the flute away, where a mummified hand grabbed it greedily.

"Mine... mine! My precious Flute of Signs! It's all mine, _all mine_,gwihihihi!"

**Summoning Attempt No. 2:**

"Just watch Ero-sennin! I'll find a way to summon my pretties even without your help!"

"Oh yeah, I'd love to see that brat!" The older man snarked at his student, amused.

"Behold! The Stick of Power!" Naruto cried out as he retrieved a long stick again from... somewhere. "By the power of the Grove of Redflower, I am GREEN-MAN!"

"Sigh... Someone must really stop giving him all that stuff he smokes..." Sighed Jiraiya as he watched Naruto undress himself to a metal-lined boxer and wear a leather harness no straight man should come within a hundred feet of. Sometimes, it _really_ sucked being that brat's teacher.

**Summoning Attempt No. 3:**

"Just watch Ero-sennin! I'll find a way to summon my pretties even without your help!"

"Oh yeah, I'd love to see that brat!" The older man snarked at his student, amused.

"Oh spirits of the world! Spread open the Weave and breach the void of Worlds! Bestow upon me my servant due! Grant me the power to devastate all opposition!" Naruto chanted as a black hole opened in front of him, mystic sigils burning into the air and... something seemed to come forth from the abyss...

"DOCTOR OCTAGONAPUS-BLAAARGH!"

Well, it certainly _did_ have the power to devastate all opposition...

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	14. Chapter 14

_Chapter 14: Hama no Kusa (Grass on the Beach)_

Dodging back and away from yet another attacker, Tenten almost screamed in anger! Not only were these enemies endless, even the few that managed to slip away from the ANBU squad that was fighting ahead of her, but they had the sheer audacity to ruin her weapons! Her twin wakizashi had been chipped, her Mangetsu Shiken had a snapped blade, even her spear had suffered damage! The only way to anger Tenten more would be to actually _bleed on her new dress_!

Which they did! A lot! And they cut it! They tore her new dress! The dress Whiskers had said made her look very pretty!

And now... Now that damn brute, with his oversized, crude, unbalanced axe... He... He... _He snapped Mangetsu Shiken's chain_!

"N... no... No... Mangetsu..." Tenten almost wept as she fell to her knees, holding the remnants of the broken chain that once made up one of her favourite weapons. "Mangetsu... My Mangetsu..." Tears welled up in her perfect, chocolate-brown eyes, filled with sorrow...

But Tenten wasn't a normal girl. She was a Kunoichi. She was a trained killer.

And she was _pissed._

Gritting her teeth, Tenten turned her sadness to rage and bottled it up, directed it into her chakra. Twin 'poof's of unsealing covered her form as she leapt off before landing gracefully on a pole, the smoke clearing to reveal her new weapon. Her left arm was covered by a metal gauntlet, with thick plates like a dragon's scales, all the way up to her elbow where it ended in a long, thick spike. Her left hand was also covered, the red-decorated black metal wrapping around and over her fingers in five long, sharp claws, and even her palm was covered in protective chainmail and leather, keeping most of the manual dexterity but also allowing her to stop a blade mid-strike. Flame decorations on her left contrasted strongly with the more wind-themed ones on her right hand. Instead of a gauntlet however, there she held a sword, single edged but thicker and longer than a katana, fire engravings on the blade and the cross guard and hilt covered by the large, fluffy orange-red tassel.

The decision to pull out her secret, final weapon, a combination of the Enko (Blaze Tiger) and Enga (Fire Fang) weapons, was not made lightly. Despite it being her most natural form, she had had the least training with it, not out of choice but necessity, as there was none before to give her a basis to start her forms from. Even Mangetsu could be tracked down to a combination of Meteor Hammer and Kusari-Gama practices. But Enko and Enga were brand new. So, while she had the advantage of surprise, she also had the disadvantage of her own body not being used to these weapons.

But, the very insult that such a low-quality weapon, barely better than what woodman could use, would break one of her well-maintained, high-quality, shiny weapons... Tenten was _not _going to forgive that stain on her honor.

So she leapt with a battlecry of 'For Mangetsu!' and dashed, head first at the target of her ire. Of course, as normal, the man trusted his own toughness and ovewhelming offence of his weapon and made a vertical chop, right on her head.

It never landed as Tenten caught the weapon's head with Enko and shoved it to the side, feeling it crash to the ground before Enga jabbed forward, making the wind screech lowly as it was cut.

Blood sprouted but it only made Tenten angrier as she withdrew her sword and spun on her left leg in a reverse pivot, back first, until her back was to the enemy and her blade was striking, like a snake, from where was once her left. Again, without losing any momentum, she immidiately reversed, again jabbing with Enga, only this time twisting the surprisingly flexible blade so it would rake across the skin in a dreadful cut. And again, she was spinning, slashing, before returning.

The man _tried_ to put up some defence, but apparently had yet to come against an enemy who would not allow him respite nor fall from a single blow of his heavy axe. Lacerations, jagged and curved, lined his torso, his clothes in shreds barely hanging on, blood dripping to the ground, eyesight going dim from the loss of so much vital fluid.

Tenten decided to end this. This time, after striking she didn't spin, she jumped a few steps back and reared her left arm. Truth is, Kakashi's creation of the Chidori wasn't based on a personnal notice of the speed of a thrust, but rather a well-known fact; relative speed of a jab plus the relative speed of a full-out run equals a very high final speed for the hand in question.

So Tenten dashed straight into her enemy, clawed gauntlet level with her head, and, at the last moment before reaching him, she leapt forward like a pouncing tigress, her claw suddenly snapping forward with massive force. "Tsuiga (Crushing Fang)!" There was a dull, squelching sound as the metal tips were burried deep into the under belly, below the ribcage, of the man, then twisting and rising before the weapon mistress pulled back, dragging half of his internal organs in her grasp.

"That was quite impressive, gennin." One of the ANBU stated. "You will go far." Despite the androgynous sound and unflattering armor, it was clear to Tenten that it was a woman who was speaking behind the Cat mask. So the little gennin grinned at her, abashed and somewhat embarassed, both of the praise and about how she must look, with entrails running down her left arm and blood sprayed liberally over her new dress.

Further talk was interrupted at the feeling of the earth itself shaking, but not from the direction of the gates, where Jiraiya of the Sannin had entered the fray atop a giant toad summon, but outwards to the Forest, where a gigantic Tanuki could be seen looming over the green sea.

...

Sasuke glared hard at the giant Tanuki, his entire body telling him to just lay down and die, the Killer Intent almost breaking his resolve right there and then, but he knew he could not do it. He had something important... something very, _very_ important that he had to protect.

Sasuke's mind raced, as his eyes, red and black with his bloodline, gazed upon a sand-formed harbinger of destruction.

A Bijuu.

It had been rather easy to follow Gaara, the current, or former maybe, host of the Tailed Beast, chasing after him and his two siblings, a puppeteer named Kankuro and a wind-user named Temari. Each had broken off, trying to stall for time to protect their little brother, but before his skill, they were not enough.

Well, that and having Shino help by taking the puppeteer off his hands also helped. Then again, even Temari, who was the daughter of the Kazekage and a skilled kunoichi on her own, didn't manage to stall for time, defeated easily and handily. In fact, she only managed to delay the Uchiha just enough for Sakura to catch up, saying that Shikamaru had remained behind because someone had been tailing them.

Sasuke was rather confident at first. They were in a forest, a Konoha ninja's home field. There were dozens of places he could hide or move through undetected. He could immidiately tell which branch was the more flexible or which would easily break. It was easy to calculate projectile vectors so as to completely avoid obstacles and hide from unexpected angles.

It became quite obvious that it wasn't enough.

Much to Sasuke's consternation, it became a match of skill versus power. The only problem being in the sheer _difference_ in stopping power.

Sasuke could throw a dozen shuriken, curving through the air, and striking from behind bushes. Gaara, apparently, could send a hundred sand needles aimed in his general area and rip through the bushes.

In short... Sasuke was outmatched.

Dodge, dodge, Kawarimi, dodge, leap over and throw a bunch of explosive kunai. Nothing; the sand just tossed them away, now it looked like it was growing like some sort of grotesque appendage, covering the wound on Gaara's shoulder and stopping the bleeding.

Leap over, dodge, _opening-quick-fireballjutsu_... Sasuke 'tsk'ed annoyed. Gaara had apparently lost a bit of his defencive power, it no longer looked like an everpresent shroud of sand, but...

"BLOOD! GIVE ME YOUR BLOOD, UCHIHAAAA!" The crazed redhead yelled, eyes wide and bloodshot as he looked around, drool falling from his chin. "MOTHER DEMANDS YOUR** BLOOD**!" Gaara swung around the tree on his _tail_. A sand tail. A sand tail that can extend and throw sand shuriken or just plain punch through a tree.

"Your 'mother' sounds like a psychotic pedophile, should I introduce her to a few shrinks I know? Bet you they'd help!" He couldn't help but snark as he drew Gaara into his prepared trap. "Trapping seal, activate!" Sasuke cried out, hands in a Tiger seal, finishing it and activating.

Unfortunately for the raven-haired boy, it meant very little to the berserker known as Gaara, who charged right through the four exploding tags, heedless of their detonation.

And once again, Sasuke found himself thanking the Kamis for his Sharingan, letting him see the charging monster and retaliating with a few more kunai.

Landing safely away from Gaara, Sasuke took one more look at the even more mutated boy. Now he was almost all covered in sand, just the left half of the face and a leg were free, the rest was swallowed up by the demon-sand. Or sand-demon. Whatever, it was still dangerous as hell.

Speaking of dangerous... Good going dodging there, Sasuke thought, evading the wide-area assault of a 'Mugen Sajin Daitoppa', or 'Infinite Desert God Breakthrough', which amounted to a localized sandstorm strong enough to turn trees to sawdust.

"Shit, how do I get close to that kind of monster..." He wondered aloud, dodging yet another sand claw, and drawing Gaara away from Sakura, who was watching anxiously but also unable to interfere.

In fact, Sakura _was_ willing to enter the fray, but she was also quite well aware that she would be nothing but a hindrance. As good as she had become this past month, it was plainly obvious that she stood nowhere _near_ Sasuke, Naruto or Gaara. Truthfully, to the terrified pinkette, these three were a league all on their own, almost 'monsters' of ninja. She might have hated herself for her weakness, but she knew she would never be at Sasuke's or even Naruto's level. And that _hurt_.

So she settled for muffled gasps of terror and agony, small sighs of narrow safety and cringing at the sound of a combat far outside her potential.

To Sasuke, it wasn't just his sharingan, nor his chakra, nor any of his skill. At some, unidentified, moment in time, he had gone past these limits. And truly, they must have been limits, if one watched the 'Last Uchiha' in combat now. Between an action and a reaction, there is a lag time. But that was nowhere to be seen on the warrior; observation, analysis, counter-strategy and reaction were done in an instant, so fast that even Sasuke himself wasn't following on his own movements, finding himself moving without even thinking about it, as if in a dream.

Gaara, however, would not be defeated so easily. Having experienced tremendous solitude, he had turned into himself, and he had found himself broken. But although his mind had broken, he had retained an animalistic sort of cunning. One that understood the 'value of camaraderie', or at least what others felt about bonds. So, his entire body covered by Shukkaku's sand, leaving only the left part of his face human, he lashed at a direction other than Sasuke.

It was like the bridge.

It was just like the bridge in Wave.

And, just like the bridge in Wave, Sasuke's body was moving before he had even realized it, sprinting as fast as he could, all to make it.

To Sakura, the world turned into a blur, a sharp pain on her left ribs, as her crush pushed her out of the way of a crushing sand claw.

To Sasuke, he only had time to wonder why he did it, when the world spun around _him_ once more, and he found himself _cold_.

"My, my, Sasuke-kun..." A familiar voice, slightly distorted behind the clay mask but still clearly feminine, noted. "It is usually the man who carries his woman, not the other way round, you know..."

Looking up from the arms that held him, _bridal style -oh the shame_, Sasuke looked up to see the one person he hadn't expected to take part in this fight. "Haku?" He sputtered and he could see, even through the almost non-existent eye openings on her mask, that she was grinning smugly at him. "What the hell are you doing here?"

The Hyoton-user let her male friend (_**not **__boyfriend -yet_) land on the tree branch and appraised him. He had grown quite a bit in that short time, wearing black overalls and a pair of white arm warmers, in which she could detect a few weapons expertly hidden. But she had changed as well. Her battle kimono was changed to more icy hues, white and blue all over, but now she also wore a bit of light armor over her chest, made so as to not distinguish male from female the better to enhance her 'androgynous' appearence and unsettling effect. She did however carry more accessories this time around, including a kodachi strapped horizontally on her back, for quick drawing and striking, along with a few large flasks of water. Even her hair had taken a more refined haircut, made even more apparent when she removed her mask to show the few hints of makeup around her eyes and cheeks.

Still, she couldn't help but pout, something that, thanks to her new makeup, she was exceedingly good at. "Oh me, and here I thought you'd have liked seeing me again, had we not shared a few _special_ nights together in Wave?" Sasuke's indignant spluttering was _definitely_ worth Sakura's glaring.

Gaara, of course, chose just that moment to interfere, shouting wildly about interferences and 'destroying their existence' before launching himself, yet again, towards Sasuke and, the new target, Haku. Both the ninja managed to dodge away from the berserking attack; for all his power, Gaara was awefully predictable.

"So" Sasuke asked, nonchalantly even as he was dodging sand bullets. "why _are_ you here?"

"Oh, you know, Zabuza-sama, he still works as a nuke-nin for hire, settling debts." Haku ducked under a claw and slid along the ground to launch a few senbon that were quickly deflected, though the explosive tags attached to them did their job of halting Gaara's assault for a few seconds. "When Orochimaru approached us for a job, we dug and found out about the upcoming invasion plan. Unfortunately, Zabuza-sama is still a nuke-nin and can't show up for the fight, he was greatly annoyed because of that, I expect whatever reinforcements Oto has won't be showing up in full, if at all." She smiled at Sasuke. "But, missing-nin or not, I wanted to come, and so I did. Just in time as well, Sasuke-kun, you really need to be more careful!"

Sasuke grumbled under the good-natured teasing, but he couldn't refute the fact that Haku was right. Nor that he was glad she was there, even beyond the fact that she would be able to greatly assist him in the fight.

Sakura on the other hand, was not _that_ happy. In fact, she was positively feeling murderous towards the Ice-Kunoichi, but also aware that Haku was out of her league. No matter how much she tried to reassure herself that exotic looks, pink hair and bright green eyes, would give her the advantage, the truth was that Haku was a _yamadeshiko_, the very personification of what a japanese woman should look. And as if that wasn't enough, Haku could be just as forceful as Sasuke, smart as Sakura and extremely talented.

"Sakura-san," Haku pulled the pinkette from her depressing thoughts. "please get away from the battlefield, Gaara-san is dangerous enough, we can't afford to split our attention to you as well. Besides," She smiled that infuriatingly beatific, innocent smile. It made Sakura almost want to throttle the girl. "How can you play 'naughty nurse' with Sasuke-kun if you're injured?" That of course caused Sakura to turn beet-red, splutter and blab that she 'would never do something so indecent'. At least it stalled her enough for both Haku and Sasuke to put some distance between Gaara and any bystanders.

"That is a... most aggravating enemy..." Haku began, rather conversationally all things considered. Her enemy wasn't a strong enemy, just a very annoying one. "Do you have any ideas? I would rather not use a risky maneuvre like my Makyo Hyosho..."

"Hn." Sasuke's grunt brought a grin to her lips, he was much more expressive with those sounds than someone might think. "A Suiton jutsu to wear down his defence and a Fuuton into my Katon to break down what's left." He dodged another wild attack with ease; while powerful, they were linear, easily predicted attacks. "I've got a seal here that will stop him."

"Very well, just give me a few seconds." She didn't after all have Zabuza-sama's chakra reserves, her jutsu came more from her vastly superior control of chakra that eliminated wasting of excess power. Still, even she couldn't cut the chakra cost of some jutsu to _that_ extent. Which is why she carried those water flasks on her; apart from making it easier to drink during missions, it was also there to help her with her more water-costly ninjutsu.

Sakura watched in awe as the ice-user seemed to still for but a few seconds before her chakra presence was put on display like a bubbling jet of water, one of those 'geysers' Iwa was famous for. Water streaked out of the flasks, ignoring pesky laws such as 'gravity', like snakes under a charmer's song, before uniting in one and, instead of a serpentine form, they took a draconian one instead.

"**Suiton: Suiryuudan no Jutsu (Water Style: Water Dragon Bullet Technique)**!" The great, yellow-eyed dragon of water coiled protectively around Haku before, with a point, it roared like a thousand crashing waves and launched itself at Gaara.

Said redhead was all but able to react to this threat. Apart from his obsession with the Last Uchiha, he also had problems in the form of a constant hail of weapons, mostly of the 'explosive kunai' variety, that didn't allow him even a moment to attack, much less react to a threat aside from the one right in his face. Still, he was not considered Suna's secret weapon if he could be defeated that easily, nor would he allow it to happen, so he still, somehow, did manage to leap away, perhaps some left-over instinct of his tanuki tenant.

Once again, however, Haku proved her skill and control of her techniques. Her dragon wasn't as strong, or large, as Zabuza-sama's, but her control was such that it allowed her to manipulate its motions; instead of attacking once, if but in an all-destroying way, she could turn around her water-formed beast and attack again. Surely it was trying on her reserves, but not nearly as much as creating it in the first place.

Up in the air, Gaara, not having trained with Fuuton techniques in favour of crushing all opposition with his Mother's sand, was defenceless. Against an element that he had never even _seen_ in such abundance, he had no idea how to respond in order to avoid getting a direct hit.

The dragon tore into, and through, Gaara's absolute sand-based defence, like a knife through rice-paper, pausing only enough to crush into him and then smash him into the ground, thankfully he still had the sand on his back to avoid getting his spine broken from the several tree branches he went through.

"Now!" Sasuke was already in place, having thrown one of his last remaining kunai, linked with ninja wire, right on Gaara, the sluggish sand unable to rise to the challenge. "**Katon: Ryuuka no Jutsu (Fire Style: Fire Dragon Technique)**!" Flames burst from around him like a corona, swaying once, twice and then seemingly receiving their command before leaping onto the wire and rushing down its length to their target, like a pack of hungry wolves, only their shape being long and serpentine.

They weren't even half-way there, a testament to Haku's speed, that the ice-ninja had finished her technique and cast it, imbuing the fire with her chakra-rich wind after a call of "**Fuuton: Daitoppa (Wind Style: Great Breakthrough)**!"

Flames fed on oxygen and gorged themselves until they could take no longer, growing and growing, their color not red any more, instead having taken the yellow-white sheen of the sun, the dragon roared one more time, drowning out the world.

Gaara could only look, frozen by terror as the burning beast descended upon him like the vengeful god of all the people he had killed.

...

Few had thought to look at it, but those who did, were surprised as well as terrified. A large rectangular of violet fire, situated atop a building. A powerful barrier, but what was more important than that, was that inside it were two of the most opposed people alive in the shinobi world.

An old man, named Sarutobi Hiruzen, who even at the twilight of his years could be considered one _those_ old men, a Hokage with something to protect and the so-called 'God of Shinobi' and 'Professor', named not only after his prowess and tactical and combat genius, but also because of his mastery of ninjutsu; he had not only learned, but _mastered_ all non-bloodline-specific ninjutsu in Konoha, and many that were from other countries as well.

On the other corner of the proverbial 'ring' was a rogue named Orochimaru, a genius of his time and greatest monster of his age, a man with a goal and the obsession to go with it, Konoha's 'White Snake', shedding his humanity like a snake sheds it own skin to grow bigger and stronger.

"So, it has come to this, then..." The older man muttered, disappointed just as much as angered. Not only at his enemy, his former best student, but also at himself. "You finally return to Konoha to destroy it..." His anger seemed to shimmer beneath a veneer of sorrow and grandfatherly disappointment before, suddenly, it made itself all too clear. "Did you honestly think we would keel over and die, my _stupid apprentice_? Are you as conceited to think that the student can so easily surpass the master? I never taught you all my tricks, foolish _**brat**_!"

"It is because I never needed them in the first place, 'sensei'." Orochimaru's sibilant tone masked the annoyance he felt at the old geezer who simply wouldn't die like the worthless old relic that he was. "It is after all, as you said, the older generation must make way for the younger one."

"Ah, but the older generation must also spank the younger one when they act like upstart children." Sarutobi was never one to so easily fall in combat, physical or conversational. "And I think it's time for a long overdue spanking session." Because, even if he was old enough to see his best friends die, even if he was old enough to see his son and daughter die, even if he was old enough to be able to play hard of hearing and of painful back, he was still Sarutobi Hiruzen, the Sandaime Hokage, and he would be _damned_ before he let an upstart like that attack his beloved village. For everyone he had lost, there were two more that he had met from them. How had Haku, and Naruto after her, said it? 'Precious people', yes, Konoha's people, _all of them_, were his precious people.

"I'm not a child any more, 'sensei'!" Orochimaru snarled, could the man at least pay attention to him! Always with that irritating act, as if he was inconsequential before his skill. "I have long since surpassed your power, I have long since become the strongest shinobi to have come from Konoha! As I am now, not even that pathetic fool Namikaze could hope to rival me!"

"Ah, still sore about that little thing, eh? Why was it, I wonder, that you wanted to become a Hokage so much, Orochimaru? Had you ever had something to protect, or was it just the arrogance and greed of a little boy crying out to the world 'I want'? Do you even know yourself? No, you don't; you never had anything worth protecting, nothing to place above your own, fleeting life. No matter how hard I tried, what I did, you never made bonds with the others, never mingled, even when you were the 'Sannin' you kept yourself at arm's reach. For that, I am sorry. But for what I'm about to do... I most definitely am _not_." With that statement and a flutter of clothes, Sarutobi revealed his old armor, always worn beneath his Hokage robes.

"So, you would strike me down again, 'sensei'?" Orochimaru asked, infuriated with that old man's ramblings. "You, who called me his 'favourite student', the 'future of Konoha', would strike me down, for wanting what was always meant to be _mine_?"

"What are you talking about, baka-deshi? Don't tell me you believe I have _ever_ really fought you? _**Boy**_, I never, not even once, took you seriously. Maybe that's why you got such a big head, allow me to deflate your delusions of grandeur, _brat_."

Orochimaru knew what the old man was playing at, he was trying to anger him to carelessness. He knew it, but he couldn't change the fact that the dismissive attitude of his old teacher was working wonders on his pride. So, even as he told himself to be careful as he charged, ready to pummel the old man with fist and foot, he was still quite surprised when his blow seemed to go right through the old man.

"First lesson: Don't trust your senses, baka-deshi!" And then Orochimaru was feeling untold amounts of pain as a singled knuckle seemed to bury itself, twisting along the way, almost an entire foot in length into his gut, sending him careening, head over heels, to the other side of the arena.

Straightening himself up from the crouch he had ended up as he allowed his **Bunshin** to fade away, Sarutobi smirked. This was what it meant to master a technique; not just using it with no leakage or handseals, but taking it to the highest level possible, in this case overlaying the illusionary clone over himself to conceal his counter attack, almost like an after-image. His student might be great and know many jutsu, but he never quite appreciated mastering them to the extent they became second nature.

Picking himself up from the ground, Orochimaru ground his teeth; Taijutsu was not his forte, but his master beat him like he was a gennin! "You will pay for that old man, before this day is over, Konoha will be nothing more than salted ashes!"

Sarutobi laughed at his student's declaration. "Is that so, my stupid apprentice? Then maybe I should take you seriously and end this little spat of yours so I can remove the trash from my backyard." He teased, oh how fun it was! Naruto-kun must be rubbing off on him, it seems. Well, be that as it may, it was time to get serious, his student wasn't so stupid as to allow anger to cloud his anger for long. Old hands flew into handseals and lips barely whispered words that made roof tiles lift up into the air and launch into Orochimaru.

But the snake-user was not so easily defeated, instead choosing to leap into the air for better accuracy and launch a barrage of poisonous snakes from his sleeve.

Still, Sarutobi wasn't known as the 'Shinobi no Kami' for nothing, nor was he unfamiliar with his student's techniques, so he was moving before his greatest failure had even leapt up to avoid the first attack. Hands slammed down and turned the roof to a river of mud, from which a dragon reared up, spitting cannonballs of hard mud at bone-shattering speeds. Hands flew to another set of seals and aged lungs breathed in and then exhaled a gout of flame, igniting the mud balls in powerful flames.

The fight was on.

Bodies twisted, fist and legs lashed out, fire was breathed and earth churned, snakes leapt and metal flashed, a dance so complicated, so simply _harmonious_ that it seemed the partners had been practicing for a lifetime and a half.

ANBU watching outside the isolated area were gaping at the sheer _skill_ displayed, so much greater than their own that they would have been naught but hindrances even if they had found a way to pierce the barrier.

"It's _over_ sensei!" Orochimaru snarled, even as his voice remained sibilant. "Our combined forces will wipe Konoha off the face of the world! Even if you defeat me, which you are utterly incapable of, an old relic as you are, how are you going to defeat two combined armies?"

Sarutobi only pointed outside, where leaves had flooded the village, bringing with them the so-called 'Mori no Kage-Oni', the 'Shadow Demon of the Forest'. One Uzumaki Naruto that seemed to flutter amongst the deluge of leaves. "Does that seem like you're winning? Naruto-kun seems to be pushing back your 'combined forces' on his own!" The old man barely resisted poking out his tongue in an absolutely childish way.

"REGARDLESS!" Orochimaru roared, infuriated beyond words as he saw the same damn brat that had _wounded _Him in the Forest of Death also tear into his forces. Granted, he was only doing well against the lower-ranked ninja, but considering the age of Oto, that's was just about all his forces -and most of Suna's too! Just a single brat, a single, pathetic little brat, had almost _dismantled_ his war effort! "I still have aces in my sleeve, aces that your pathetic mind, so _stuck_ on morality and views of 'good', woud never begin to comprehend! I have sacrificed so much, worked so hard! _This_ is my reward!"

Sarutobi couldn't help but feel bile rise up his throat as he saw _the monster_ his once-favourite student had become, seeing him slouching off skin like a snake to reveal another face behind his original one, a younger, feminine one, a face that _was not Orochimaru's_! "You... You _monster_. You have perfected that abominable kinjutsu?" The old man snarled, filled with fury. "How can you fall so low, how can you be so arrogant? Have I never taught you anything?"

"Oh, you _did_ 'sensei', you taught me a lot, how to fight, kill, how to analyze a situation and turn it to my advantage, all so useful lessons... But you are wrong; I didn't 'fall', I _rose_! I _ascended_ to a greater existence, one so much more superior to the fleeting instants in time you _pathetic mortals_ are limited in! I... **am eternal**! I... **AM A GOD**!" He roared, snake-like characteristics becoming even more so, skin splitting to reveal scales.

_'No, you're just a transexual brat with a superiority complex and delusions of grandeur, not to mention your snake fetish.'_ Sarutobi internally sneered back, but didn't say it. Instead, he chose to glare at the one who once was his most favourite student, the one for whom's sake he had often left the others without teaching for days or weeks. "Such hubris, boy. Don't you know that pride comes before the fall?"

The blase, almost dismissive, answer of his old teacher infuriated the rogue Sannin, and he once again engaged his master in combat, leaping around like fleeting flashes of shadow, silvery glares of their hidden weapons litering the battlefield, a mesmerizing dance of death.

And yet, Orochimaru _still couldn't finish it_. His master couldn't decisively strike him, not with his ability to flow like a snake, but also neither could he land a blow on his monkey-like acrobatic enemy.

He had to end it, and end it soon before his old master became familiar with his combat style and started landing more serious blows.

Orochimaru leapt away and sneered imperiously at the Sandaime. "I told you I am a God before, did you think I would claim such a thing only by virtue of immortality? No, _sensei_, I have a _far_ greater claim to my name than merely that... After all, is the White Snake not the herald of _rebirth_?" He grinned viciously, victoriously, at his teacher's rapidly paling face. "Behold! This is my domain, old teacher of mine! Life and death are merely words to be _toyed_ with before me!"

Sarutobi felt horror and fear in equal measure well from his gut.

Three coffins began to rise from the ground.

...

"That... is _so_ not fair." Sasuke stated rather conversationally, standing next to Haku... in front of a giant Tanuki made of sand, and when one states 'giant', it would also be prudent to state that 'giant' meant being _twice as big as the trees around them_!

Gaara, terrified at the prospect of his death, only shouted something along the lines of "No! MY EXISTENCE WILL NOT DISAPPEAR!" and, lo and behold, he became a huge sand monster, straight out of a nightmare.

"So... ideas?"

"Umm... Dodge the freakin' giant hand that's coming towards us?"

"Good plan."

Both ninja leapt away as the claw came swiping down, the sound of crashing trees actually _overshadowed_ by Gaara's insane laughter and shouts of 'erasing their existence'.

Just as it had become lately a habit to Sasuke, a part of his mind simply _detached_ itself from the curent proceedings and, in absolute calm, simply made wisecracking jokes. At least, it also kept him calm before the overwhelming power of a jinchuuriki, no, a _bijuu_.

"His size might be the answer." Sasuke stated, hiding behind a tree next to Haku, away from the seeking sight of the sand monster. "His attack before was rather slow, we can use it."

"But how?" The girl next to him asked, rather worried. Oh, she would protect Sasuke, but she definitely hadn't expected going against a Bijuu to be part of her daily program. She would have at least cleared up any other appointments! "We can't kill him, or the monster will simply break free."

"Here." Sasuke handed her a weird tag, sealing language written all over it. "a suppression seal made by Jiraiya of the Sannin. Just attach it to him, anywhere, and activate it, it should suppress the Ichibi." Seeing her worried look, he grinned with confidence he didn't feel, and he knew she knew. "You're still faster than me, so you have more chances to do it. I'll make a diversion for you, just get it done and we'll both be fine."

"I..." She wanted to deny that claim, she wanted to tell him that she would be the bait, she wanted to, _gods she wanted to take the fear and terror and danger away_, but she knew she couldn't do it. Sasuke was much better at avoiding harm than her, his Sharingan easily warning him of impending danger, while she could move much faster than him even now. "...very well..." Her emotions fell dead and she, once again, became 'Hunter Nin'. He was right after all, if she could do it, he would be safe from danger in but a few moments.

Sasuke leapt from his hiding place spitting fireballs, drawing Gaara's eyes to his first 'prey'. The last Uchiha could only hope that would be enough of a distraction to give the opening they needed to Haku.

It was only when she was moving, commited to her attack, that Sasuke's sharingan made his blood run cold.

_There was chakra all around Gaara_.

The redhead berserker... had outwitted them. He knew he had two 'preys' to hunt, and he held back.

"HAKU! NO!"

Their enemy wasn't a physical being; it was a monster of sand made in the likeness of a bijuu; its form was malleable.

Red and black eyes saw it perfectly, the moments as another tendril of sand, sharp and fast, erupted from around the redhead, they swallowed up every single painful detail, from the fluttering of the sealing paper to the way Haku's eyes had widened at the surprise, the fear, the resignation that she had **failed**.

That it was all over.

Gaara's laughter was the stuff of nightmare, taunting and insane. **"HAHAHAHA! MY EXISTENCE IS STRONGER THAN BOTH YOURS! YOU CANNOT DESTROY IT! DESPAIR! DESPAIR AND DIE! DO YOU WISH TO FIGHT ME UCHIHA SASUKE?"** Then he was quiet again, with a hint of vicious venom in his voice. "Then you had better hurry up." He waved Haku's trapped and struggling body around before slamming her mercilessly on a tree, his sand wrapping around it quickly. "Because if you don't, **I WILL KILL HER!** So come, hurry! HURRY!** HURRY! HURRY AND ATTACK ME, UCHIHA SASUKE!"**

Rage swelled within the Last Uchiha's chest. It was a burning, and yet freezing, sensation. It was not fear, the likes that makes your knees weak and your skin shudder. It was rage, plain and simple, one of Sasuke's last, and most precious, links to his waning sanity was being threatened, obviously right in front of him.

It was an insult to Sasuke, it was a threat to his pride and it was an attack to one of the, maybe three, people that he actually cared about.

It was _inexcusable_! It was _unforgivable_!

Sasuke stared up at the demon, now all but freefree. "Damn you... Let her free, you bastard!" He cried out, chakra swirling like flames around him, glaring impotently at the red-headed psychopath. A mark in the shape of three tomoes pulsed and the raven-haired boy ground his teeth as he tried to suppress his rage.

"THEN ATTACK ME! PUT YOUR EXISTENCE AGAINST MINE AND SEE WHICH ONE SURVIVES! THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE LIVING FOR, AREN'T YOU? PUTTING YOUR LIFE, YOUR EXISTENCE ON THE LINE, FIGHTING ENEMIES WHO CAN KILL YOU, SO UNLIKE THE TRASH YOU HAVE TO WORK WITH EVERY DAY! THE THRILL OF ALMOST DIEING! YOU'RE **JUST** LIKE **ME**!"

_'Dammit... what can I do? It's hopeless, I can't get close to him and my Ryuuka is too small to destroy such a large enemy, the chidori would only kill him and release the demon... I can't... I just can't do it... I guess... I guess I'm going to die now... I only wish it wasn't Haku-chan who also suffers that fate... if anything, if she could live...'_

But there was no way; he could already hear her struggling, calling her water to weaken the sand's hold over her, but it would not be enough; she wouldn't have enough chakra to see it through, at best she's delayingt he inevitable...

Standing, alone, abandoned, weak, on the branch, Sasuke's world was falling apart. It was only when he shifted his weight, hoping to just get a single hit in, even if it would be pointless at least he would go down fighting, that he noticed a different weight on his ninja pouch.

Like all proper shinobi, gennin and jounin alike, he had memorized with his own body the weight of his ninja pouch and the way everything was placed inside. That way he would be able to tell if someone took it from him, placed something in it or even how many weapons he had left. But there was something in there, that he wasn't used to, a new weight.

Looking for a weapon to arm himself with, his hand brushed around a spherical, squishy thing. He grabbed it lightly and pulled it out. Ah, he remembered it now. Naruto's last gift before he got himself tangled in this mess.

Sasuke might have been ready to give up, but he hadn't been the friend and team mate of Uzumaki 'I'll-never-give-up-believe-it' Naruto for nothing. Besides, he lived through his brother's homnicidal insanity, Zabuza's attack, Haku's mirrors...

Only... this time, _he was alone_. There was no strage 'mercy' to spare him. There was no Kakashi-sensei to pull ninjutsu out of nowhere. There was no Naruto to take all the blows and turn the tables.

No, this time, _he_ was all that was left. He peered into the grape, grateful for the few moments of respite the redhead psycho was giving him, looking deep into the light that seemed to pulse, like a heartbeat, in it.

Sasuke was alone. He was the only one left. The only one of a clan, the only one of a team, the only one left. It now felt to his shoulders to get it done.

"'Let's just fucking do it', huh?" He whispered, quoting an old manga he had read once. Well, not that there were many options, just one; lay down and die or go down fighting, and if anything, no one could accuse Sasuke of taking the easy way out.

The grape-like fruit went _'squelch'_ inside his mouth, much more solid than what he had expected it to be, a warm, sweet flavour, almost enough to make him sick.

Then came the chakra.

_It was endless_. It was an _ocean_ he could feel himself drown within! He could _feel_ his veins pop out, his blood flow faster, he could _taste_ his blood in the air, the blood vessels unable to hold so much pressure and creating minute ruptures that healed just as soon as they were made, flooding his body with blood, his skin almost _bleeding_! He could feel, taste,see,smell... _**everything**_.

It felt like a God had wrenched apart the curtains that shielded the World's true form! It felt like he could _truly_ see for the first time! It felt...

_Like a God._

Mere seconds after it, while Sasuke was still enraptured within the awakeningly-narcotic effect of the fruit, he was then flooded by the opposite feeling to the sheer pleasure; that of _agonizing pain_.

Just as the ingredients had released the dormant power of Sasuke's body, they also released the dormant power of the parasite that was on him.

Tomoe-like designs flamed with power and crawled out like fire, bringing their own heady, addictive power to the mix!

Sasuke felt like he was being torn apart, and he knew, he _knew_ that he wouldn't be able to hold all that power inside for long. The chakra was resting like an almost palpable weight on his shoulders even now!

So, while Sasuke was not like his brother, learning a new technique in moments, he had a different gift that his father had not seen; his eyes had the ability to _break down_ and _analyze_ whatever came into them. Like an entire team of scientists, each taking up a part of the problem to break it down to its simplest parts, Sasuke's Sharingan tore down techniques and simply made them anew.

And right now, at this moment, lost in a haze of power, pleasure and pain, he recalled three things perfectly.

_Training with fire on the small lake near his house_.

_Calling up lightning into his fist atop the lonely mountains._

_Naruto's handseals as he demonstrated a single jutsu to his team, right before the exams._

The adrenaline that now had flooded Sasuke's body made the world stand still, held for the longest time, just for him.

His mind, so able to detach itself from the rigors of reality to think clearly, was sent into overdrive.

_Position of hands. Importance of handseals. Channeling of chakra. Control and shape. Why those handseals? Why those elements? Why in that order, time? Why this alteration? Why? Why? WHY?_

Flames, hot and strong were given birth in his lungs and then breathed to his left hand. Electricity seemed to slowly gather at his fingertips, stronger and stronger, until his right arm was covered with a glove of lightning.

_The wind blew to the left with a speed of 0.2341MPH. Distortions around branches, calculated. Distortions due to initial facing of the paper, calculated. Distortions due to ink weight, calculated._

He had never gone through those handseals, he had never even known they were possible until Naruto showed him the large scroll where all his observations on the effects of particular hand and finger locations.

He attempted them nonetheless.

Five handseals. Each alien and unseen before in the Elemental Nations. Not even static, as most where, but motions even so as to better channel the _sympathy_ between his two elements and the way he wanted them to work _together_.

**"Enton (Blaze Style)..."** His voice sounded alien, heavy, loaded with power to the point that it seemed to _echo_ in the ears of the observers. **"Maou no (Devil King's)... Manto (Cloak)."**

It seemed like lightning and fire had taken on a life of their own. A layer of chakra barely preceeded the flames, keeping them from scorching his body and removing ground for the electricity. Another layer came above the lighning, forcing it to eternally bounce between the layers of chakra he had formed, like an armor or more like raiments of war, around him.

"W-WHAT IS THIS? WHAT TREACHERY IS THIS?" Gaara shouted, but Sasuke did not hear. Even if he did, he would not have cared.

He could feel his chakra running out fast, he could feel it tearing itself from his chakra system painfully, violently, viciously, to feed this... monster of a technique.

It had to end. _Now_.

He leapt!

Trailing flames and a flash of lightning behind him, he flew! Bounce under the branch ahead, head down, turn over and pick the sealing paper!

Sand claw!

Dodge to the side, leap up! Again! Again! Climb, CLIMB!

Another hand! Leap over and land, now! Gather it all, your chakra! Shape it, form it! A single, cohesive unit! Solid! More solid, more physical!

There! Now! JUMP!

Gaara screamed in absent terror at the _being_ that was flying towards him, and his hands flailed wildly, causing arms to sprout from the Ichibi's body, all launching themselves to stop that _monster_!

But the lightning chakra around Sasuke tore the Earth element of his Sand apart and the fire scorched the Wind to feed upon it.

It seemed like a spear, thrown by an old, forgotten war-god, piercing through his greatest defence as if they were nothing, drilling through as if they were nothing and-!

It was a near-forgotten feeling that gave Sasuke pause right before thrusting his fist through Gaara, _the bastard who hurt Haku_, and disperse the chakra there to slam the bijuu-suppressant on his face.

As he felt the **Maou no Manto** stole his consciousness away, Sasuke had one though dominate his mind, just before his seal-covered fist landed on the jinchuuriki. _"This look of despair... __**would look perfect on Itachi's face**__!"_

...

An old man was facing the one who once was his most beloved student, heart now filled with seething rage as he gazed on two very important people, now used as little more than marrionettes to destroy that which once they held dear. "Are you so corrupted, my former disciple, that you would go against the very nature of this world? Are you so _conceited_ as to think yourself a god? DO YOU WISH ME TO KILL YOU THAT MUCH?" He shouted, for the first time in ages, fury and hate filling his heart, suppressing the compassion and kindness he had been known for.

It was, once again, like when they were master and part of a team. The teacher's raw desire to _kill_ so strong that it felt like frozen hands shackling him to the ground, unable to act or even plead for mercy.

"Gee, old man, take a fucking chill pill, you'll pop a goddamn vessel." A redhead in one of the **Shinjienjin**'s corners spoke. The glare she received from that same old man actually managed to do the one thing no one in Sound had managed; silence her.

Meanwhile however, the God of Shinobi was not just standing there, his mind going through thousands of thousands of miles a second. He was a tactical genius and a knowledge database, he had learned and mastered thousands of techniques of varying skill, use or style.

And now he needed all his skill more than any other time. Right now, he needed to put it all to use against his new enemies. So, as much as he _loathed_ Orochimaru, as much as he wanted to tear the upstart boy apart and rend him down to anatomical lesson implements so fine one would be able to discern individual muscle fibers, he was forced to keep it inside and turn his fury to ice.

But even so, the Sandaime Hokage was well aware of the fact that it would be a loosing battle. Even if the two men before him, the Shodai Hokage and Nidaime Hokage, were at a mere tenth of their skill, they would still be more than enough to overcome him with Orochimaru along them. In fact, it was even worse in that he couldn't even kill them; the accursed jutsu would simply regenerate them over and over again! It would be a battle of attrition, a battle he would lose. And as much as he didn't care about his own life, so insignificant before the lives of his entire village, he was also quite well aware that should he fall, Konoha would follow.

But the jutsu had one major downside, beyond the fact it had to be premeditated and prepared long before its use; each soul could only be summoned _once_. Only once and that was it. So, Orochimaru, bless his blind arrogance, in all probability wouldn't be able to make another Edo Tensei summon. The hard part was taking the two already summoned men out of the fight...

_'How do you kill something that cannot be killed? Damn it, that's like the Kyuubi... wait, Kyuubi? Of course, you have to seal it away, but how could I seal those two, I'm not as good as Jiraiya-kun on living-matter seals unless... It would take a lot of chakra however, chakra I don't have, the Shiki Fuuin would be a better- wait, Shiki Fuuin, Naruto! Of course, the 'Power Grape' or whatever the hell he called it! Even if ninety percent of Naruto's chakra is wasted in the transfer, that would still be enough to put me more than three times above my prime years! So, to make things easier and get my chakra levels down, first to remove Shodai-sama from the equasion.'_

A small offering of blood, a bit of chakra and a puff of smoke later, Enma the Monkey King stood next to his summoner and old friend.

"Quick! Don't let him transform!" Orochimaru's cry came a little late as the summon was covered in smoke, revealing the Diamond Staff, a size-altering staff that Sarutobi could use with more than a little bit of skill.

Spinning the weapon around him, and no longer concerned about chakra levels since he would be recovering them soon enough Kamis willing, Sarutobi Hiruzen flew into the offence.

Well, more like 'leaped around like crazy', but it was the same thing; the staff in his hands seemed like a living thing, changing shape in an instant, smaller or larger, swiping it around and smashing it, reversing and tripping, a black blur that broke Suiton and Mokuton jutsu as if they were nothing.

For all his drivel about his immortality and the wasting curse of old age, Orochimaru found himself almost mesmerized at that old man. For all his hate and arrogance, he could not deny the simple fact that the old geezer in front of him could kick ass like it was going out of fashion! Even the two Hokage he had summoned back from the dead, despite the psychological effect of fighting your greatest teachers, it still was not enough to even slow down the great God of Shinobi.

For all his faults, Orochimaru couldn't help but feel more than a little bit of awe at the living legend in front of him, and more than a bit of pride at having been taught by a man who could take on two legendary Kage on their prime while he was in his twilight years - and killing them several times over if it hadn't been for the regenerating effect of the Edo Tensei!

Eventually, however, Sarutobi made a mistake, overextending a thrust with his staff, the Shodai immidiately took advantage of it and went on an offencive, as was his directive.

Two hands, sprouting from the staff, stopped that, holding him still.

The dreaded Sannin Orochimaru's eyes widened as he realized what the old man had done; the oldest bluff in the book! Then he paled in horror at what Sarutobi was doing _right now_!

Sealing! He was going to _seal_ the Shodai Hokage away! But, he wondered confused, that would require extreme amounts of chakra, as the Hokage would actively resist. The Sandaime clearly didn't have an abundance of chakra, not anymore so why was he doing it? Clearly, he knew it so why? Why?

The scientist inside Orochimaru, so obsessed with 'why' hesitated enough for Sarutobi to finish his handseals and seal the resurrected Kage into his hand, black tattoos appearing on his palm.

_'One down... Damn, that took a lot out of me, but at least I'm at ten percent of what I once was, though barely above twenty of what I am now...'_ Sarutobi thought, the weight of how much he had degenerated in his old age hitting him yet again, _as if joint aches weren't enough_. But he had to move, quickly, and get his student to stop attacking for a few seconds. Then again... "So, you're one puppet down, boy, are you still feeling smug?" Orochimaru could never resist boasting.

"That is merely _one_ puppet, 'sensei'. But don't worry! Once I kill you, you won't stay dead for long... You will be back in your prime, only fighting to kill the foolish insects of this village!"

"That, of course, _assumes_ that I will die here. And I think one of the first things I taught you was to _not assume_." Sarutobi taunted, enjoying the moment of one-upping his once brightest student, as well as getting his breath back.

"Assume? I don't 'assume', 'sensei'." Orochimaru grinned maliciously. "I _know_. You are old, tired, a relic from times long since gone. A fool. But me? _I_ am a God, lord of death and rebirth. Where you have no more chakra left, I am almost fresh and, you are very well aware, ninja are users of ninjutsu, an art that takes chakra to use! You, all but exhausted, could not even hope to come to the same level as I!"

"And _that_, my foolish apprentice," Sarutobi made his voice as mocking as possible. "is why I never chose you as my successor; you simply cannot broaden your mind beyond the destruction chakra can bring forth. And _that_ is why in Konoha, there are already people who far outstrip you in terms of scientific success... People who can do what you would consider weak or pointless or impossible. People, who can create things like _this_." And he had taken the fruit out of a sleeve, letting it catch the light magnificently.

If Orochimaru hadn't been deathly pale already, he would have gone in an instant. He recognized that fruit; the fruit that made the Demon Brat strong enough to hurt him! In the hands of a Ninja Master like Sarutobi!

Words _failed_ to describe the depths of worry Orochimaru was tossed into.

He could only watch in morbid terror as his old master ate the fruit, not even Nidaime being quick enough to stop him.

Sarutobi seemed to shiver and then shudder violently, going through various interesting skin colors, then he began to hop rapidly in place, far faster than it should have been physically possible!

It looked like he was copying the rabid-rabbits-on-speed experiments Orochimaru had done a few years back!

Then he was off! To the left! To the right! Above! Below! All-around zooming!

Finally a stop, at the exact same spot he was when it started.

"Wheeeew!" Sarutobi Hiruzen exclaimed in a voice several decades younger, and many octaves higher, than it should be. "Power Grapes! Crimson Fox is for _wusses_! WAHOOO!"

And the Nidaime found a fist buried in his gut, another in his left knee and a _third_ in his nose.

"WHEEEEEE!" Sarutobi seemed to whistle loudly, moving faster than Orochimaru could think of moving. It was so addicting, so _freeing_! So _alive_! HE HAD FORGOTTEN HOW ALIVE IT FELT!

After landing for a few seconds, Sarutobi managed to get his rampaging thoughts under a semblance of control, though it was tentative at best. Damn, he had never anticipated that a human could possibly contain _this much_ power in them, no wonder Naruto was hyperactive; his body must be possibly begging to be tired out.

So, first to deal with Nidaime and then he'd get down on Oro-teme's ass. Besides, he had held back significantly; his strength might have been perceived instead of real. But now he knew. Now... Now he could _really_ get into it!

"Nidaime-samaaaa~" Sarutobi sing-songed, sounding extremely _wrong_ unsurprisingly. "Remember when you grounded for not having spotless ninja sandals? I _sure do_!"

"You know, I had never thought this grip could be real... It sounded like fiction..." One of the ANBU stationed outside the barrier commented, getting nods. "Oh, now he's going for- ouch, that must hurt... Damn, I'm afraid Anko-san has a far greater effect on Hokage-sama if he's willing to do _that_ to someone..." Only nods, voices muted by awe, answered him.

Sarutobi on the other hand... was moonwalking.

After sealing the second Hokage, he had taken to moonwalking along with gestures and body movements that should _never_ be done by a man above fifty of age (and CHA 16). "Another one bites the dust! Yeah, yeah, yeah , yeah another one bites the dust!"

Seeing red, and finally realizing that things had gone astray enough from his original plan, to justify drawing his greatest weapon, the longsword Kusanagi, Orochimaru finally got serious.

Unfortunately for him, it was kind of _too late_ to do that. For his arrogance in wanting to play with his prey, Orochimaru would pay greatly.

Starting with having another up-close-and-personal meeting with Enma's staff form, who had been forgotten but not released from his summon.

If the snake user had found the older man a tough combatant before, it was only now that he realized just how weakened the man had become due to old age, and how much power he could now bring to bear.

Truth be told, it was a mesmerizing sight, especially for the sole female of the Sound Four (or Five). There was something oddly satisfying in seeing your boss, a guy with a penchant for little boys, hickeys and large purple browns, who could also incidentally take on a small army on his own and win, get his ass handed to him.

That, and the look on Orochimaru's face as he tried to slither away from 'the old man', with said old man grabbing his former student by the tail and making the eyes almost pop out their sockets, would make many of Tayuya's days.

"H-Help! GAH!" Orochimaru screamed, but didn't manage to say it all before Sarutobi played baseball with his head and Enma's largest staff form. "T-Take the barrier down! No-GUAH!" Another fine show of how a staff could be used as a lethal weapon. "R-RETREAT KAMIDAMN YOU!" Oh, look he managed to get awa- nope, old man caught up, never mind.

"Drop the barrier, now!" The Sound Four's unofficial leader commanded and his team obeyed quickly, even though Tayuya mumbled something about missing out on teachable moments.

And just in time too as their master came careening on the purple wall of their barrier at break-neck speed, launched like a bullet from yet another giant-staff swing.

Really, Sarutobi might have mastered more than a thousand ninjutsu... but he was a bojutsu specialist deep down.

A fact that no one would ever dispute from that day on, even if he looked rather insane, hunting Orochimaru and his lackeys, screaming for Enma to shrink down to 'cucumber size' and to 'be ready to expand when in the proper place'.

Despite the apparent life he seemed to be infused however, it was more bark than bite for Sarutobi; his student had been a wily enough and switched out of his bodies several times, healing the damage to the point that the old Kage had had to beat him over and over again to make it stick. So it was to no surprised to him when he finally fell on a knee, exhausted beyond words or compare, the fruit's mystic powers fading from his body.

Sarutobi's vision swam and his ears could only pick up a few words, but he still could smile as he lost his combat for consciousness.

_**"Victory! We have Victory!"**_

_**"Heart-rate dropping, readings unstable, his chakra's all over the place!"**_

_**"Shit, his endocrinal system's all out of whack! There's not the slightest hint of nutrients or fat in his body, he's ... to ...eed a ...ull transfusion at the very ...east!"**_

_**"... keep ... alive, ... you gennin, what ... you-"**_

_**"... Help... chakra... lots... you..."**_

_**"Fi... do..."**_

Sarutobi heard no more, but the smile on his face couldn't be wiped out.

Because, after all, he had protected his precious village, one last time.

**A/N: Second chapter of Konoha's Invasion, with more Tenten action and Sasuke's and Sarutobi's fights. Hope you all enjoyed them. Also, seems to occasionally hiccup on air, messing itself up and forbidding new chapters from updating or reviews from appearing, sometimes even rolling back and deleting or ignoring them. It's annoying, very much so, so if you have a review you wanted to post but couldn't, please try again! Reviews feed me!**

**It took me a bit to publish because... well... I started playing Kingdoms of Amalur! And now I want to write a crossover with Naruto and Kingdoms of Amalur! But, like always, it'll turn to a full story, and I'm finall getting a job (in a week or so)! Needless to say, considering that I will be employed at the time when I'd normally be playing Guild Wars 2 and writing stories, I'm not exactly pleased...**

**NUUU! Don't wanna work! Don't make me!**

**Can't I just write/read fics and play games all day long? Life's SO unfair!**

**Also, I want to say that I've made more than half-a-dozen weapons, just for Tenten alone... Damn, I don't know if I'll ever even put them down! If anyone's looking for weapons for their Tenten, ask away, I might be able to provide assistance. On that note, know any **_**good**_** Naru/Ten fics? I really love that character, but there's so few people who prefer 'weapon mistress Tenten' over 'I-smash-mountains-with-fists Sakura'...**

**Jutsu Description:**

**Enton: Maou no Manto (Blaze Style: Devil King's Mantle)**

**Cost: A, Control: S, Rank: S, Classification: Ninjutsu (Nin-tai jutsu), Alignment: Fire/Lightning (advanced/advanced)**

**One of the first Enton Sasuke made, and ironically the hardest of them to use. The user covers themselves with two shells of chakra. Then, he proceeds to fill them with fire-chakra and lightning-chakra. The lightning-chakra on the, relative, outer of the technique increases its piercing capabilities and allows it to ignore defences as if they weren't even there, while the fire chakra increases the sheer destructive capability. A highly advanced jutsu, that, if not mastered, could very easily tear the user apart, frying the body's nerves to their death and burning the entirety of the body's epidermis, which can actually result in asphynxiation and death. Only a present and skilled medic could hope to sustain someone who hasn't mastered it yet, long enough to be transported to a hospital.**

**Item Description:**

**Enko-Enga: Tenten's most favourite weapons but also the ones she uses the least. Enko is a large clawed gauntlet with a vicious blade hidden on the elbow pad for quick recoveries, and a nasty surprise. It is actually quite durable and even the chainmail and leather that cover the palm can stop a katana. It functions mostly in very close range, but can be vicisously effective in even longer ranges, though it cannot out-reach a sword. Enga is the opposite; a **_**dao**_** made mostly for longer ranges, though its heavy, curved blade can also allow it to work very well in closer ranges and even grapples. Enga has a large tassel that conceals the guard and hilt, preventing the enemy from reading the grip and any follow-up strikes. **_**Tsuiga**_** is a pretty straightforward technique with its origins based on good ol' charge-attacks; Tenten bodily rushes the enemy and strikes with Enko at the final moment, adding her own speed to her jab's and making the attack far more dangerous.**

**Power Grape: A misnomer as it is in no way related to a grape, this clear-purple, transparent fruit looks much like one, though it is considerably larger. It is actually solid, despite the squishiness of it making it seem more like viscous liquid. When it is freshly picked, and for about a week later, it seems to have a soft glow around it, which is actually the result of such hyper-concentrated chakra. The fruit, when eaten, acts extremely fast, within seconds. It floods the body with chakra and releases chemicals to improve its performance; adrenaline and endorphins being the simplest one. It also has the side effect of forcefully opening the first two gates of the user, if but to enable him to survive such a surge of raw energy. Unfortunately, users also tend to loose part of their ability to reason, though that does not make them stupid, simply... temperamental or emotional. Finally, if the user has any form of parasite bonded to them, it is considered to be a part of the 'body' as well and many of its limiters are removed.**

**OMAKE CORNER**

**Hyuuga Inbreeding**

On the stands, the leader of the Hyuuga clan, one Hyuuga Hiashi, looked down at his youngest daughter, and the one he actually considered a good one at that, Hyuuga Hanabi. "Watch closely, Hanabi. Your cousin is the greatest Hyuuga of all times, no one has inherited the Hyuuga blood more thickly than him, not even your sister. He is the future of the Hyuuga clan." He told at the eight-year old girl.

Hanabi looked horrified at her father. "What? You mean he's the most _inbred_ one of all of us?"

"WHAT?" Hiashi managed to cough out amongst his spluttering and bursting pressure.

"You said he has the thickest blood! That makes him inbred! OH GOD! NEJI IS MY COUSIN, UNCLE AND BROTHER! IS HE GOING TO BE MY HUSBAND TOO?" Hanabi screamed in absent terror, and more than a bit disgust.

Sometimes, Hiashi decided as he saw _everyone_ in the stadium looking at them in disgust, sometimes it was just one of _those_ days...

_**A/N: Seriously, how can that guy simply state 'he has the purest blood of all' like that? The moment he said that in the anime, I was screaming 'INCEEEST'!**_

**Visiting Naruto's Greenhouse Scene Nine:**

The fight for Konoha was hard for the shinobi, harder for the surviving civilians and even harder for the large, green-skinned humanoid-like warriors that suddenly appeared and tackled the intruding Oto and Suna shinobi with terrifying ferocity.

The sight of something tearing someone else's arm off and using it to beat them to death never quite leaves you alone. Nor the sight of something literally biting the head off of someone.

But these... men, things, whatever they were, seemed particularly vulnerable to fire. Wind didn't seem to even faze them, they only bled for a little bit, something that looked like runny tree sap, but even the bleeding didn't go for long, nor did they suffer from shock. Precision blows were also pointedly ignored, literally when someone took their sharp gardening tools into account. Pain didn't even seem to register beyond making the raging humanoids even angrier. No, to be killed, they had to be cut to small pieces, so small that they wouldn't be able to even bite them to death.

Yet, the berserkers were few in number and they fought recklessly, with no regards to safety, neither were they especially trained in combat and war, not to mention they knew no jutsu and their weapons were gardening tools at heart.

So, in the end, the two-dozen or so warriors were killed to the last.

To the last?

No, not exacly. Two of them escaped.

As mostly heads with a nearly ripped apart body that pathetically drew themselves away into a sewer, but they survived.

And in the darkness they raged, recovered and _multiplied._

The humans were at fault. All those humans, except The Maker of course, they were all to blame for Rainbow's death.

They would pay! First, they would make an army and then, they would strike!

So, the last of the green berserker humanoids bid their time, recovered and built an army. They would destroy the humans even if it was the last thing they did!

They took names to distinguish themselves from the others that would come, to show them why they would lead and not they. The words they had half-heard once when The Maker had been happily embraced by one of their brothers and sisters.

It had been a gurgle really, but the survivors liked it. **"Gork."** Had one named itself and the other **"Mork."**

Seeing the only common thing in their names, the others that followed were only known as 'Orks'.

Several tens of thousand years later, the humans would still wonder why the Orks didn't take kindly to forest fires...

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	15. Chapter 15 Intermission

_Intermission - Ice In The Mind_

Why?

For as long as he had been who he was, that was important.

Why?

First to see what. Then to see how. And then _why_,

Why did it happen?

Not 'how' as the lesser would say.

It had all been made perfectly.

_His hands squeezed the chair, blood running down his fingers._

Why? How?

What had he miscalculated?

What had he done _wrong_?

Why had he miscalculated?

HE HAD THOUGHT OF EVERYTHING!

All this time! All this work! All those sacrifices! Were they for nothing?

IT WAS ALL FOR NOTHING!

WHY? What had he missed? What little detail had he missed?

What had changed in his experiment?

WHAT? WHY? HOW?

What... The what he knew.

_He calms his anger, hides it behind a veil._

He had failed.

_His anger rises again, but he chills it, forcefully, though his teeth grind together._

How... The how he knew.

_Bile rises up his throat and he swipes the table of his work, sending paper and bottle viscera alike to crash to the floor._

He had been bested by a superior force.

_Eyes, yellow and evil glare at the sole candle of the room, and it flickers from his vile will._

But WHY?

WHY had he been bested? No, not why had he been bested, a superior force always defeats an inferior one.

It was logical!

So logically, he should have won!

HE SHOULD HAVE WON!

But he didn't!

He lost! Why had he lost?

He had made every preparation, foreseen everything!

Were his jutsu not superior?

THEY WERE SUPERIOR!

Was his will not superior?

IT WAS SUPERIOR!

Was _he_ not superior?

HE WAS SUPERIOR!

So, how had he lost? Why? What had changed?

_He remembers... a violet, grape-like fruit, a flicker of light within it... Then he remembers pain._

HUMILIATION AFTER THE PAIN!

The fruit... was that the why?

No. It HAS to be! It MUST be!

He must have it... the fruit...

He must have it... the why...

He is a scientist. He must know. He must always know.

_He glares into the darkness and schemes once more, but he still is concerned._

WAS THAT THE WHY?

Orochimaru's sleep never came that night.

That night he shuddered like the child he had sworn he never was, frightened once more. Uncertain.

He couldn't find out the _why_.

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	16. Chapter 16

_Chapter 16: Konoha no Monshuu (Crests of the Leaves)_

~Tatsumaki no Mon - Crest of the Tornado~

Naruto woke up feeling as if a gang of Orks were dancing around in his head while he was in a hangover.

Being Naruto, of course, he didn't let it get him down, he opened his eyes, despite the evil that was the Sun, and looked around.

_Pretty-pretty lights!_

He giggled. Then he giggled some more.

"BLOOD!" He cried out loudly. "BLOOD! THERE'S BLOOD! SO MUCH BLOOD!"

"Uzumaki-san, calm down!" A nurse came running in as soon as he began screaming and thrashing on the bed. "There is no blood here!"

"THERE! LOOK! BLOOD! IT'S EVERYWHERE! EVERYWHERE!" Naruto kept screaming trying to remove himself from the blood that tried to drown him, though in truth it was only the sheets. "YOU! Blood! Take it off! Take it away! BLOOD! No more blood! NO MORE!"

Seeing his wide, frantic eyes, the nurse pushed a small button on the side of her bed that quickly administered a few powerful anaesthetics that nocked the blonde out in an instant. "Ah... I always knew that the Kyuubi would drive that boy mad... it's only a matter of time until the demon breaks him. Maybe it would be best I put him out of his misery-"

"Incorrect." An emotionless voice interrupted the nurse, an ANBU appearing from the corner. "That is not the result of the Kyuubi, but rather of what this child was forced to do."

"And what _did_ he do? He killed, murdered, _butchered_, a bunch of people! I was there, in the arena when he... he cut them to pieces! It's been two days and we're still trying to gather up the pieces!"

"Not that. The gennin's strongest technique splits his awareness, his mind, into many pieces. He has the chakra to split himself over three _thousand_ times. When the technique is over, all the pieces are instantly pulled back to the original, carrying with them all of their experiences." He let that sink in for a moment. "Even five minutes of combat, three thousand 'selves' would mean at least three dozen kills, by miss, luck or chance. And this gennin had this technique active for over an hour."

The nurse didn't reply, but her ashen pale face, the realization of why this boy was screaming about 'blood', suddenly hit her with the force of a sledgehammer. She might have been a doctor, she might have learned many medical jutsu, but she had never been an active-duty shinobi, she never saw the killing being done, only its after effect. "T-Then this boy..."

"He bears a burden that most ANBU haven't even considered. The last person who bore it was Uchiha Itachi, and we all know how that ended." There was a moment of quiet in honor of the destroyed clan. "But, dare I say, this boy is stronger mentally than even Itachi. He has carried the burden of everyone's hate, the constant isolation and ostracism, and yet he has been this stable... No, the Bijuu has had little to no effect on his personality. He needs time to recover however, conscious time, so he can deal with what happened."

"I... see..."

"Oh, and I'm going to bring him a small flower pot, do not remove it. I know it calms him down to garden."

...

The next day Naruto woke again, his eyes seeing blood cover the walls, but at least this time there was a nurse who calmed him, and Inoichi who gave him counseling. Still, neither of the two could completely follow the boy's shattered mind as he jumped from subject to unrelated subject with alarming frequency. Changing from a discussion of blood to talking about 'up and down' mid-sentence was quite unsettling, but Inochi was rather hopeful since he noticed that every time the blonde hopped from one subject to the other, his eyes cleared up a little bit more. Apparently, this chaotic changing of focus was what he did to 'recover' the parts of him that had been shattered.

It was still over a week after his first waking up that Naruto became... gathered... enough to ask about the old man Hokage.

"Sandaime-sama is still comatose." Inoichi had replied, watching as the boy randomly sketched unrelated words, numbers and shapes, even just splashes of colors that were made with alarming focus and control. "But he is still alive, though we do not know for how long... His system was overloaded with a vast, and dangerous, amount of steroids and stimulation chemicals, not to mention his keirakukei spontaneously creating almost two dozen extra tenketsu from an unforeseen burst of chakra that had filled him." Inoichi gave the boy a curious look but continued when he didn't stop drawing. "He will recover eventually, we hope, as this kind of effects aren't completely unknown, even if we have never seen them all together in one moment, but the truth is that Sandaime-sama is old. His body... doesn't recover as it used to... In all probability, he will be permanently weakened as his chakra coils will never recover all of their lost power. Sandaime-sama cannot be Hokage any more."

By now the blonde had slipped back into catatonia, even his breathing had seemingly stopped, and Inoichi got up to leave, he knew that those episodes were mostly so Naruto could 're-archive' his shattered thoughts and memories, and it was a process that lasted for several hours at a time.

...

A day later, a song could be heard, unexpectedly resounding through all the corridors of the Hospital, despite being rather low in decibel range;

"I... want to destroy and annihilate...

Devastate and exterminate...

I... want to bring destruction to you aaall~"

And the insane laughter that followed that would haunt many a nightmare of a doctor.

But still no one could tell how the blonde made the little flower grow to cover every wall with thorny vines and large, red blooming flowers... Especially since it was supposed to be a _cactus _with _yellow_ flowers and he had _no tools_.

~Okami no Mon - Crest of the Wolf~

_Shadows_.

Shadows were the most dominating part of the location, its strongest characteristic.

Shadows, and the _predator_ that stalked in them, with mismatched, red and black, eyes.

He was a predator. He was a hunter. He was a stalking wolf.

He was a stalking wolf with no _prey_.

He could feel his instincts _scream_ at him to speak the code that would unlock the doors so he would release his killing aggression, so he would hunt and kill once more.

He could also feel his watchers looking at him from the closed camera circuit.

He was a _wolf_ in man's clothing and he was struggling to contain his emotions, his predatory desires.

Hatake Kakashi shivered in the dark as he tried to control 'Shi. His alter ego had been unleashed in a major way in the invasion, a couple of days, _or was it weeks?_, ago.

Not only had he depended on his ANBU persona to fight during the first stages of the Arena fight, but when Naruto almost lost consciousness from the use of his latest technique, Kakashi had been forced to pick up the pace.

Hijaking a technique is considered next to impossible, but few shinobi have a sharingan along with the ability to fight perfectly well without it. Even fewer have explored the limits of their bloodlines to the extent Kakashi had; having an incomplete bloodline in his eye, he explored and experimented with it until he could no longer, far beyond what any Uchiha had probably gone before.

After the blonde had used his Mori Yuurei Guntai, the chakra use had been... explosive. It had also tired out the blonde very quickly; not even he could cover the entirety of the village, only the majority, which had left quite a few enemy ninja still wandering in the few districts that had been outside Naruto's range. Unfortunately, one of the enemies in the arena had had a flare which he had used; an attack-signal that had any enemies left swarming the arena in order to take down the high-priority targets there. And with Naruto mostly out of it, Kakashi had had to remove the leash from 'Shi.

So, he hijaked Naruto's Konohagakure no Jutsu. By synchronizing his chakra and substituting his own for his student's in select leaves, Kakashi had suddenly found several points in the arena that he could simply spontaneously appear and disappear.

For an assassination-specialist, that is pretty much the ultimate trump card.

But even that had not been enough, mostly because he couldn't just _cut loose_ and focus on offence, he had to defend the others too.

'Releasing' his restraints on his other personality also triggered a psycho-somatic effect much akin to an adrenalin surge. That coupled with the opening of the first two Gates had turned Kakashi into a killing machine.

Unfortunately, this created an overdose of testosterone and adrenaline, which in turn caused an increase in aggression and killer instincts.

Hence why now Kakashi had been put in isolation until he could fully control himself and not accidentally stab anyone that came within reach of him.

At least 'Shi had waited until Kakashi had taken Naruto up to the roof where the Sandaime had fallen. Since the blonde's own chakra had been used in the creation of the fruit he had given, the boy's chakra had already the 'affinity', or 'sympathy', required to best affect the old man's deteriorating status.

"Kakashi-senpai." A voice came from a suddenly-transparent wall. Before even the second letter was out, a long, sharp rock shaped remarkably like a kunai had impaled several inches into the wall, right where the right eye behind the animal mask appeared to be. "Your students have just awoken."

'Shi didn't dignify it with a reply. He only sent more kunai stabbing into the wall, kunai made of stone he had ripped off the walls and floor and reshaped into weapons, _without the use of tools or chakra_.

_'Not enough yet... More time... More calm...'_ Kakashi thought internally, trying to control his own instinct to murder.

The shadows deepened. He would spend many hours here.

~Tate no Mon - Crest of the Shield~

Opening his eyes was beyond a chore, it was _torture_.

But the sheer amount of _pain_ he felt, not just bruise-pain, or muscle-pain, not even cut-pain, but a deeper, resonating, more _profound_ sense of pain, it was enough to tell him that he should open his eyes fully to face the music.

Because, even though he didn't remember much at the moment, he knew that being in pain means that there had been a fight. And if there had been a fight, there had been people, _his people_, who had been hurt. As their Hokage, he had to tend to them.

"ANBU." Even though his throat felt parched as the desert and his body was lethargic, he was still the freakin' Hokage and he could make his voice sound as a dominating command at any state he might have been.

"Hokage-sama." The responce was immidiate as the stationed ANBU personnel appeared, kneeling next to his bed.

"Urgh... Raise me, so I can look at you." And so the ANBU did, raising the back of his bed. "Thank you. Now. Give me a report from the moment I fell after Orochimaru fled."

"Yes, Hokage-sama. After your loss of consciousness, the remaining combined forces of Oto and Suna were pushed back into a retreat, for the most part having been already rounded up." The ANBU began, saving the details for the full-debriefing. Hokage-sama probably wouldn't care about a gennin or two. "Medics had already been on alert from the second the barrier had been erected and so were quick to come to you. According to medical file reports, your keirakukei almost tore itself from the inside out and there was a sudden, almost-lethal level increase of chemical stimulators. The medic team finally stabilized you and you were, as per protocol, transported to the underground medical care facility."

"Yes, I had deduced as much." The Hokage waived it off, he was a sharp man after all and this place wasn't the civilian, or even shinobi, hospital. And he had detected the shinobi that had been on the location. "Tell me of the civilians and Suna, what happened afterwards? And, if you know, what happened to Naruto-kun?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama. Suna quickly retreated and professed forceful partitipation and usurping of their Kage, whom they have found a ways outside their Village, dead for months." Of course, he didn't say that Suna had suspected foul play, but didn't care enough to report it, they had been overcome by their thirst for revenge... and paid the price for it. "The Civilian Council tried to press for charges, not even realizing their own Kage had been replaced is most ashaming and condemning of them, along with several trade agreements." In other words; spoils of war. "Several members made concerted attempts to gain more political clout, but their actions were denied by the Shinobi Council and the Acting Leadership." Politics, it was always about damn politics.

Konoha's council was split in three parts. The first part was the Civilian Council, made up by major merchant guilds and other administrative posts. The second part, the Shinobi Council, was made of the major clans of Konoha as well as major shinobi forces leader, such as the head of T&I, ANBU and others. Finally, the Elder Advisors, Homura and Koharu, were Sarutobi's second in command and those responcible for running Konoha in his stead. It was a rather effective system; everything was split between the two coucils, the Civilian side taking care of peacetime ventures, and the Shinobi side which took care of wartime proceedures. Both of them were ruled and controlled by the Elder Advisors and the Hokage himself.

The Acting Leadership were a select few chosen people that had control of various parts, and those parts _only_, in the case the Hokage was unable to command at a time. It was composed of hand-picked members, such as the acting ANBU Chief, Homura, Koharu, Danzou and others.

But, while the system was quite good, if not perfect, but then again nothing is, there was always the element of Human, in this case Greed. At least, for all their faults, his Acting Leadership group was able to 'tame' each others greed and find a golden cut in most problems.

"Oto has officially been declared as an Enemy of the Villages." That was a mostly pointless designation, meaning that a village, or large organization of ninja or other elements, was a major force against the tentative peace. It could be either good, making that force an enemy of everyone who wished for peace, or a bad thing, as it easily revealed someone as a possible agent for future warmongers and trouble-makers. "Suna has ceased all offencive activity and the prisoners have been assembled in safepoints for future negotiations." In other words; prisoners for concessions. Damn politics, like a chess game with human lives as pawns. "The Shinobi Coucil has activated all reserve shinobi and has several patrols stationed. All communications out of the village have been stopped."

"Ah." It was protocol after all. "And what of Naruto-kun? And I did see a bijuu outside our village, what about it?"

"Jinchuuriki Uzumaki Naruto," The ANBU began, getting a glare at the inhuman way he referred to the boy. "used a powerful jutsu, that he created himself according to Acting-Jounin Hatake," Once an ANBU, always an ANBU, Kakashi was merely 'called' a jounin, but he would always be an ANBU. "to assist the fight, but was almost completely exhausted after it. Apparently, he still recovered enough energy to aid the medic team after the fight was over." Even the voice-distortion seals, the mask and the emotional training of the agent wasn't enough to fully mute the respect that colored his voice.

It made Sarutobi smirk. Hate him or love him, no one could just deny his surrogate grandson.

"As for the Bijuu, it was a limited manifestation of the Ichibi no Tanuki, named Shukkaku, located within Jinchuuriki Sabaku no Gaara, son of the Kazekage. Gennin Uchiha Sasuke defeated it on his own, though not without support, even if agents discovered no additional help besides the same's teammate, gennin Haruno Sakura." Now Sarutobi raised an eyebrow, and it wasn't the audible respect he was getting from his ninja. "Unfortunately, Gennin Uchiha has yet to awaken from the results of his fight." Now that was worrying, actually. "Jinchuuriki Sabaku apparently had use of some unconventional and unexpected techniques; we detected powerful remnants of Lightning and Fire chakra over both external and internal injuries on Gennin Uchiha's body. However, the Jinchuuriki Sabaku has never shown such affinities before, instead they belong to Gennin Uchiha, confirmed by the latter's chakra signature as well." The ANBU was very obviously confused as he looked to the side. "We speculate that Gennin Uchiha used both Raiton and Katon at the same time to power a technique that would pierce through the sand-based defence of his opponent, with it being a mixture of Fuuton and Doton. However... it is most peculiar in the fact that, not only the amounts of chakra used were far more than Gennin Uchiha should be able to produce for a few years more, but also, they were mixed together, though not fused."

"Explain."

"Our speculation from the results of the fight, marks on the body and evidence of the fight scene, point to the fact that Subject Uchiha layered a shell of Raiton over a cluster of Katon. However, it is not as straightforward as this; there was quite a common ground between the two types, but they were still separate and able to retain their original properties." The ANBU looked down in shame. "We do not understand how, but it seems Gennin Uchiha either found a way to force his chakra affinities to... cooperate, for lack of better explanation, or he possesses a _second_ Kekkei Genkai, of which not even Acting-Jounin Hatake has ever been made aware or suspicious of."

Sarutobi rubbed his head tiredly. He was too darn old for this shit. "Very well, you are dismissed. And tell Jiraiya-kun, who stands outside that door, to come in."

"By your command, Hokage-sama." And the ANBU was gone, only a second later to be replaced by the last loyal Sannin.

"Yo, old man!" The white-haired man greeted exuberantly, but quickly stopped at the glare of his sensei. "Yes, I did have a few clones following high priority targets, and yes, that does include Sasuke." The Sannin took a seat on his old teacher's bed. "I saw the fight, though I hadn't found need to interfere. The boy had one of my youki suppressing tags, though I had readied myself to slap mine on the berserk jinchuuriki had that failed. Anyway, I don't know what really happened, but the boy ate a weird fruit, looked like a large, violet grape or something, and then exploded with more chakra than I have." Then he looked down, grimmer than ever. "What really creeped me out was that, it wasn't just _his_ chakra that was generated... but also _Orochimaru's_." That drew a surprised and fearful look from his master. "Yeah, I know about the boy's seal, but that should have still been impossible, not in _that_ kind of levels... No, I think Orochimaru's Cursed Seals are more than just sealing, but you never let me take his former apprentice for an in-depth study trip."

"Because, I know very well, what could happen, Jiraiya-kun. She was compeltely unstable at the time and after that..."

"Yeah, yeah I know... Anyway, I also saw the boy do some kind of weird movements, looked somewhat like seals, but he didn't just place his hands, he _moved_ them in specific ways... The next thing I know, he's covered by an armor of fire and lightning and moving fast enough to outpace many jounin. Frankly, it looked scarily like the Raigeki no Yoroi that both the Raikage and that nutcase Kurosuki Raiga use. On the other hand, Kakashi _doesn't _know the jutsu, so I have absolutely no _idea_ where he learnt it from. That's... very troubling..."

"Yes, I understand... Now, tell me, what's my condition."

Jiraiya flinched, he wished it wouldn't have been him to tell his old master. "Not... Not good... We almost lost you, hell, we _would_ have lost you had it not been for Naruto coming to donate a shitload of his chakra, he's an Uzumaki alright, he had almost fallen unconscious after his damn-near village-wide jutsu, but he had recovered enough by the time you were done with Oro-teme to give quite a bit. For some reason, his chakra seemed more... I dunno, effective? When applied to you. Anyway, sensei, you're in a pretty bad shape and... you will probably never recover anywhere near your old strength."

"So we need a replacement. And it can't be you." Though it stung that his hard-earned power would be diminished even further, Sarutobi swallowed his pride and pressed on.

"Yeah, no can do in _that_ post. I'd have the kunoichi wearing mini-skirts as formal uniforms. But... we _could_ get Tsunade... She'd even be able to monitor you, too."

"Hm... I don't want to do this, but it's high-time she stopped running from herself and got back. I believe I left her more than enough time to grieve and act like a spoilt princess, it is time for her to remember her duties." Sarutobi agreed; he loved the girl dearly, but that self-destructing attitude was getting... annoying. "So when will I be released?"

"You can walk out at any point you feel well enough, the doctors said... but you must not use chakra for at least a month; your kerakukei was torn _apart_. They say you not only lost quite a bit of your reserves, but also a good deal of your control. Sorry about this, sensei, but whatever you did up there, it kicked Orochimaru's ass, but if you do it again, it's going to kill you."

"It wasn't something _I_ did, Jiraiya-kun... it was something _Naruto_ did, for me." The Hokage replied, looking piercingly at his student. "I want Uzumaki Naruto, in here, as soon as it is possible. There are many things that have to be said, and I'm not in the mood for games right now. I'm getting way too old for this shit."

The remaining Sannin looked down, embarassed. "About that, sensei... It seems that abusing his Kage Bunshin has had some... nasty side-effects on Naruto's mind." He took a deep breath and decided to speak it, his teacher was glaring at him rather nastily. "His mind was... fractured, for lack of better words, but he's recovering! Inoichi says he will make a full recovery very quickly, the fastest one he's seen! And it isn't like Naruto's mind was broken, it's more like... he became many smaller pieces rather than a large whole, like it got separated to... simplify... and deal with the strain. It's all going very smoothly, according to Inoichi, but he'll be out of it for a while longer."

"Jiraiya... if _anything_ happens to Naruto-kun..."

"Gee, old man," The Toad Sage replied with a smirk. "you're getting sloppy in your old age; you still haven't realized that I am a clone -the original is standing guard personally over the brat." His smirk turned serious. "I am not letting anything harm him. Should Danzou, or any Danzou, try to lay a hand on _my_ godson, I will tear them apart with my bare hands. I abandoned him once. I put the village and his general good over his own good. Kamis be my witnesses, I will _not_ do it a second time; the hands-off approach led to a nice, big fuck-up. Screw the plan, I'm going to take it seriously. I'm _not_ losing their son."

~Tsuki no Mon - Crest of the Moon~

"I will be visiting Hinata-nee-sama today, Father." Hanabi stated as she was having her breakfast in front of her father. Her sister was in the Emergency in the first day and she had wanted to visit her, but due to security lockdown measures, she could only leave her clan residence today. At least her older sister had pulled through finally and was now resting easily. Surprisingly, there was always Neji that stood guard now, he hadn't shown up at all, apparently spending day and night over her bed. _'Most peculiar... Neji-nii-san used to hate her and I, but now he stands vigilant guard over her? Too sudden a change, does it have to do with whatever caused nee-sama's condition to worsen, or was it Uzumaki-sama's display of power? I need to learn more...'_

"Why would you wish to see that failure? The elders assure me that she is being treated by experts. I forbid it."

"And yet I am going anyway, Father." Hanabi's calm reply had her father spitting tea, and her grinning internally.

"What? I am still clan head, while you might be my daughter, my word is still Law!" Hiashi exclaimed infuriated, and more than a little bit surprised at Hanabi's blatant insubordination.

"Law? I never obey laws from someone who does not have my respect, Father, and you have long since lost almost all shreds of it."

"Hanabi! Despite you being the heir to the clan, that does not give you the right to talk back to me! I am still your father!"

"Hmm... is that so? Then why are you a mere figurehead to the wills of the Elders?" She sneered back with enough force to match his glare.

"You- You dare!"

"Of course I do. What are you going to do about it? Without the Elders to tell you what to do, you do not have the will to control me." She snapped back and got up to leave.

"Hanabi! Hanabi, I demand that you give me a clear answer!"

The little girl stopped and looked at him critically, judgingly. "Very well. Here is my answer; you do nothing unless told by the Elders. Despite your personal feelings, you always, _always_ do whatever they tell you, regardless of how stupid that is."

"Hanabi! The clan's Elders are older and far wiser than you understand! You may not see it now, but they have always guided our clan to greatness!"

"If you think that a bunch of senile arrogant relics of the past with delusions of grandeur and a complete inability to break free from the past is what has led us to greatness, then Father, you are utterly unworthy of even being considered a 'human'." She growled at him in a rage he had never seen from her. Sure, he had known that Hanabi was strong-minded, but he had never seen such _fire_ burning inside her eyes. "You always obey them! Like a little tool, a _slave_!" She snarled and Hiashi flinched as if slapped. "They tell you that Mother is fine, and instead of taking her to a doctor to see why she coughs blood, you ignore it! They tell you that it is Hinata-nee-sama's fault that she couldn't defend herself against a jounin when she was a child, and you believe them! They say that you should hate Hinata-nee-sama, and you _hate your own child_!" Hanabi stopped to take a few panting breaths. "You are a complete failure as a parent, _'Father'_." She sneered. "It is you, after all, that has made Hinata-nee-sama so weak."

"Weak? I always push her to grow stronger!"

"NO!" She cried out, whipping her hand to the side. "You always knock her back down every time she gets up! You always blame her for the tiniest flaw in a style that she shouldn't even be learning! You always, always, hurt her for no reason! You always despise your own daughter, seeing her as nothing more than a means to an end! That makes you a failure as a father! What else do you have to be respected for? You failed as a husband when you failed Mother, you failed as a father when you failed nee-sama, you _still fail_ as a clan leader being nothing but a puppet to the clan's elders, you even fail as a shinobi!"

"What did you say!" Hiashi screamed getting up, eyes bulging with his Byakuugan, chakra surging to his hands. As a jounin, his pride in his skills as a ninja was unshakeable. But, there was also the fact, that he _couldn't deny_ Hanabi's words! "Watch your tongue, _girl_, I am a jounin of Konohagakure, you are not even a gennin!"

"Jounin? HA!" Hanabi laughed at him. "You, a jounin? But you would loose to a gennin like Uzumaki-sama! You think he went all-out against Neji-nii-san? Do not presume his strength to be so little; you were unconscious at the time that he, alone, cleared out half of the invading forces in the Arena, in but a few seconds! You were gone, when _he saved my life and virtue_! I do not even know if you had not fled the village when he called the very forests themselves to protect Konoha! I _saw_ him, father, I saw him call on a thousand leaves and turn each into a blade wider than I am tall, I saw him fight jounin and beat them! So _you_ should better stop assuming!" She finished, turning on her heel to exit the room and the clan compound. "I am going to visit Hinata-nee-sama."

"Hanabi! Stop where you are!"

"No." She didn't even stop walking. "The moment you told me that I could not visit Hinata-nee-sama, you lost the last shred of respect I had for you, Father. You raised me to give my allegiance to whomever is strongest. You believed that you and the clan Elders were the strongest, but I see the truth now." She paused to look up to the sun. "It is not only age, skill, or even chakra that matters. No, it is something greater, something far more sublime. It is _will_. The Will to defy your Fate when you do not wish to obey it. The Will to stand up after being beaten down. The Will to defy those who seek to imprison you like a wing-clipped bird. I wonder, if that is what Sandaime-sama called the 'Will of Fire'. But I _do_ know, that you do not have it Father. So, while I do still love you as my Father, while I do still want to believe in you, be your daughter and heir... I cannot. The future clan Head of the prestigious Hyuuga clan cannot be, _must not be_, a figure head. They need a strong will, a good judgement and the desire to protect the clan. I do not see that in you, or the Elders. So, while I may obey your commands in what I believe you are right in, I will make my own way, if I have to. It is up to _you_ Father, this time. The Elders cannot tell you what to do. So, what _will _you do? Cut the last tie with your daughter so we have a strictly professional relationship until I grow of age to take the mantle of clan leader, or will you rekindle your will and make our clan into the _family_ that it should be? I, for one, am _tired_ of waiting for you to become a _man_."

Hiashi couldn't even find the strength in himself to reply or rebuff her words.

Because she was right.

Unbelievably, she was _right_. When his wife suffered, he trusted in the clan's Elders and did not visit a doctor until it was too late. When Hinata was abducted by a jounin, _a jounin for Heavens' sakes!_, he quickly blamed Hinata for it, and his brother's death. When Hinata did not take well to the Jyuuken, he did not allow her to learn the healing arts she had wanted, or illusions from her sensei, or even an alternate taijutsu style. When Hinata tried to get close to Neji, to comfort him, he did as the Hyuuga Elders told him to and punished her with excruciating training.

Not once in those many, _many_ years, had Hiashi ever questioned the Elders. They were right, he had thought. They were older, wiser, more experienced, so of course he was to do as they told him.

And now, he had not only lost his eldest daughter to her crippling weakness and his twin brother's son to hate, he had also lost his youngest daughter to the sheer disgust she was feeling at being associated with a weak-willed failure.

_"You have failed as a Father. You have failed as Clan Leader. You have failed as a Shinobi. What good are you for, what is left for you to _fail_?"_

"Merciful gods... what have I been doing? What... what should I do?" For the first time in a _long_ time, Hyuuga Hiashi found himself asking questions that no one could answer for him.

...

Entering the medical ward where Hinata was currently placed, Hanabi came across a sight she had never thought she would see. Oh, she had known alright, but she had had yet to see it.

Merely seeing it, made even her remarkable self-control fail to conceal a tiny smile.

Hinata was on a bed, paging through a book on medicinal plants and their uses, Neji sitting next to her and talking to her about the missions and times he came across some of these plants. He was looking on his cousin with such a soft look that one could wonder if that really was Neji or an impostor, let alone the fact that he quickly re-adjusted one of her pillows of his own will, instead of a command.

"Ah, H-Hanabi-chan!" Hinata was known to the Clan at being very spacially aware, even compared to a clan with all-seeing eyes, with the only exception being when she was focusing on something that held her attention, which tended to turn her into a more obsessive single-minded person. "H-how are you d-doing? F-Father?"

"Father is fine, if a bit... indisposed... at the moment, courtesy of the Elders." Hanabi's reply was short and mostly emotionless, as was her demeanor in most cases. Besides, she couldn't afford to let emotions slip her hold now, not with her newer plans at stake. "As for myself, I am well, I was unharmed in the fight, thanks to Uzumaki-sama, who protected both my life and my virtue." Each word was chosen to convey the greatest amount of unemotional-veiled emotion she could. Hanabi was rather pleased to see Hinata's eyes twitch minutely at her mention of 'Uzumaki-sama'. Yes, just as predicted. "I am having trouble finding him since, however." She turned her eyes serious, questioning and as uncertain as would be realistic on her. "I absolutely _have_ to reward him, in whatever way I can, for saving the future clan head of the prestigious Hyuuga clan. That and... I wish a more _personal_ favour from him..." She looked demurely to the ground, every move calculated for maximum suggestiveness, when seen from a particular perspective anyway.

"P-Personal f-favor?" Hinata squeaked out. It was, after all, the perspective Hanabi had been aiming for.

"Yes... A _very_ personal favor... If he would allow me, I would become his student... and more besides." Of course that meant apprentice, but to Hinata... Now for the killing blow. "I even heard that he will be offered a betrothal contract with our clan, to assure he would not release his _mighty jutsu_ to elements that would then destroy our clan, or do it himself, with such _huge chakra_, I expect that he could wipe our clan out on his own..." Once again, the importance of stressing words in just the right ways and looking at someone in just the right way was instrumental to the success of Hanabi's plan.

With Hinata approaching a tomato, or perhaps a volcano considering, even Neji was forced to supress the chuckle that wanted to escape. "So what else has happened, Hanabi-sama?"

"Oh, many things, including a large sweep of possible spies, which kept me house arrest all this time, unfortunately it also made Uzumaki-sama's trail go cold and now I cannot find him no matter where I look." Oh yes, by repeatedly pointing out to the point of Hinata's interest, Hanabi's words would easily be magnified in importance and make her sister pay far more attention to them than she should. Oh, it was so easy to manipulate her! "I even tried to sneak into his home last night, but alas, it was empty."

And so it went, Hanabi talking about 'Uzumaki-sama' as if he was her new idol, Hinata becoming more and more uncomfortable as she sat on that hospital bed and Neji having to conceal more of his chuckles, as he had caught on to at least a part of Hanabi's plan. Truly, he thought, Hanabi was deserving of the clan Leader title; if she was _that_ manipulative right now, she would be a _terror_ later on! To what end she was manipulating however, Neji had no idea, but he also knew that he should trust the little girl and not reveal her plan to Hinata. If Hanabi was going to such lengths for something, then she had a pretty good reason to do it. Besides, he knew, Hanabi would never intentionally hurt Hinata, well, outside a spar anyway. With Hinata's crush being rather well-known to all who paid attention (which, naturally, excluded the Hyuuga elders and Hiashi himself), the pint-sized Hyuuga would never try to purposefully 'steal' Hinata's chance at the one she wanted.

Which begged the question, what was Hanabi after anyway? The eldest of the three could only speculate, but he had nothing to go on beyond his assumptions.

~Kaji no Mon - Crest of the Flame~

Opening his eyes felt like swimming through molasses; it was slow, painful and absolutely _exhausting_, but he had to.

There had been no way for him to know how much time had passed, how many hours,days,weeks,months,years,decades,eons,millenia- ok, so it _hadn't_ been millenia, but still...

So he opened his eyes and, like the seasoned shinobi hat he was, he began to evaluate his environment.

Large, unadorned windows with white curtains. Unfomfortably hard bed. Annoying beeping sounds. Completely white walls. Stale stench of medicine and blood and white spirits.

He was in a hospital. Judging by the branches of the tree next to his window, he was not higher than the fourth floor, but higher than the first. Going by the rule of the middle, he was probably in the second floor. It was midday, the shadows were too short, but whether it was before or after, he couldn't tell.

The door banged open as several people barged in, all in lab coats, screaming, shouting, pointing, checking, writing notes and generally _pissing him off_!

"The subject is awake! The subject is conscious!" One of them crowed and he glared balefully at her.

"Why yes, I am awake, is it such a surprise to you that I would not go and kill myself on a ditch? I am an elite _Uchiha_, woman, and we do _not_ die that easily." He snapped at her and, as much as he might have liked to refute it, he liked the way her eyes widened, her breath caught and the way she seemed as if she was staring at a predator far bigger than herself.

_Like the mouse caught in the gaze of the serpent_.

"Uhh... umm... I-I... S-sorry!" And she was out, away from that hostile, crimson eye of the last Uchiha.

"Uchiha-san, are you feeling alright?" The head medic questioned, the rest of the crew going about their business with far less clatter than before.

"Yes, why wouldn't I be? I am no weakling, fool." The boy sneered with such hostility that it made the man flinch and wither away.

"W-well, i-it's that... you have been out for several days now, with very little improvement beyond the stability of your condition. Naturally, we were worried you might be slipping into a coma." He gulped as he saw the glare intensify. "W-well, you had wounds all over your body, so it was a definite possibility we wished to avoid, you see? Most of your injuries had been treated, but only with a field-kit apparently. Haruno Sakura-san, she was the one that notified the ANBU about you and got you back from the forest, she did a great job, almost as good as _I_ would have done, but with only a field kit, she was rather limited in options..."

"Wait, Sakura? She was alone?" Sasuke demanded hotly. "There was no one else when she contacted the ANBU, they didn't find the presence of anyone else?"

"N-No, Uchiha-san, i-is something the matter? Was there someone else as well?" The doctor inquired curiously but immidiately stopped at the murderous look in Sasuke's eyes, even if it was directed to the wall and something only he could see.

_'So she left me... She fled, leaving me to be bandaged by that weakling Sakura... Haku... Why did you abandon me? Was it all a trick? Did you lie to me?'_ Thoughts like burning iron spikes ran through Sasuke's mind, searing pain blossoming, a white darkness that threatened to knock him unconscious.

"No. There was no one. No one else. I was wondering about Gaara and the rest of the Suna team." He quickly changed the subject, though it was far less from an optimal change.

"Ah, yes, Sabaku-san, the children of the deceased Kazekage... They were taken care of as well, at least the worst of their wounds anyway. They are recovering and spending their days in holding cells, though I advise against going to speak with them, we're afraid that Gaara-san isn't exactly the most... stable... of people..."

"Yes, yes, good, now leave me if all you are going to do is hover over me like vultures over a not dead yet beast!"

Such was the commanding force behind his words that everyone packed up and left quickly after it, leaving behind only a tray with high-energy food that Sasuke was quick to devour.

He needed the food after all, even if it tasted worse than wet carboard. He had to grow strong, stronger, he had to be able to challenge all who would stand in his way!

He couldn't trust anyone else, either. Haku had left him behind, abandoned him. Sakura was pathetic. Kakashi was a burn-out of a shinobi. Sandaime was an ancient relic. Hell, even Naruto was-

"Ugh!" Sasuke felt another, new, terrible stab of pain and grabbed his head, trying to make the headache stop.

He hated headaches. He hated that they were not enemies he could fight with steel or fire.

He hated them! They were so annoying, they made him so angry!

_They all made him so __**angry**__!_

Sleep would come for the last scion of the once-great Uchiha clan, but rest did not. Only nightmares, terrors, insecurities, frustrations awaited Uchiha Sasuke in his own mind.

...

When next he awoke, though he had no idea when he fell asleep or for how long, his rage had subsided quite a bit.

No longer did his brain feel like trying to get out of his skull, or a flaming hedgehog spinning madly within the bony confines.

But, though his rage had cooled off, he was still hurt, betrayed, at Haku not staying with him, leaving him even through everything he had done.

_'She had no choice but to flee, she is still a nuke-nin.'_ He tried to convince himself. _'But she didn't even leave a note, she didn't even dress my wounds, she didn't even stay with Sakura-'_ The rest of him would supply.

And an even more traitorous, _sibilant_, part of him also told him something else. _'She stayed with you only to get close to Naruto... it was never you, only Naruto, never you, always Naruto-'_

His quiet, yet rebellious, thoughts were interrupted by the sound of giggling girls outside his room. Desperate for some news, _any news_, Sasuke channeled his chakra to his ears. It might not be a technique he has mastered yet, but it is definitely a big help.

_"I'm telling you, Na-chan! Uchiha-sama is the greatest! He defeated that big sand demon, on his own!"_ Sasuke smirked. His legend was growing already! His strength was increasing day by day!

_"But, but Hina-chan! You don't know it, do you? It's just rumours, for all we know there might have been someone else there that did the work for him!"_ The other complained and Sasuke's smirk turned to a scowl. How preposterous! He was an Uchiha, he didn't need anyone to do his work for him!

_'Ah, but Haku did help, didn't she? It's not your fault, it's everyone else's, meddling people that keep you weak, pliable, bound by chains-'_

_"As if! Uchiha-sama defeated that big sand demon, everyone knows it! Plus, he's like _so_ much cooler than that Uzumaki guy!"_

_"No way! You didn't see Uzumaki-kun! You just ran off to the shelters, but Uzumaki-kun... He was awesome! I saw him, Hina-chan, I _saw_ him because it happened in front of me! He came, you see, when that ugly guy tried to hurt me, I cried for help and... and he was _there_!"_ Sasuke could _feel_ the girlish blush on the second girl's face, and he glared. _"And not just for me! He did it for the entire village! He was everyone at once, calling up the trees to protect everyone! His jutsu covered the entire _village_!"_

Sasuke cut off the chakra flow with a jerking motion, as if slapped.

He knew what jutsu that had been, the Mori Yuurei. The jutsu that not even Kakashi-sensei could use. The jutsu with such a high chakra cost that it could easily kill even a genius ninja such as him. The jutsu that all but defeated Momochi Zabuza. A jutsu that was cast over the entire village.

"Damn you... Damn you, Naruto... Why do you always have to be out of my league? _Damn you_..."

And while there was pride in his friend's accomplishments, for even he would admit that the blonde had worked his ass off for every shred of power he ever gained, there was also the burning jealousy, the searing betrayal, the crippling fear that... _'You have already been left behind, abandoned by them... Kakashi hasn't checked on you, Naruto hasn't checked on you, Haku never cared for you...'_

~Ken no Mon - Crest of the Sword~

It's been three days after the Invasion and Tenten's grumbling over her home's small forge.

It had been a major fight, and a great test for her growth as a kunoichi, which she was glad for. On the other hand, though, most of her equipment had suffered quite a bit of damage. And not just chipping or a dull edge, some of her weapons were almost unsalvageable, she'd have to break them apart and try to put them back together as something new, if she wanted to at least save something.

"Damn Suna, damn overgrown axe-wielding bastards, damn inferior steel, damn being a freakin' orphan, damn the freakin' civilian council locking my clan's funds..." She muttered as she tried to disassemble one of her kodachi to see if the hilt was salvageable, the blade already broken off.

Growing up as an orphan was never easy, it wasn't meant to be at all, really. But, while Tenten couldn't boast a 'renowned' clan or a bloodline, she _did_ come from a long line of weapon-users and she had inherited their talent. Unfortunately, when her mother died, her father already gone by the time the Kyuubi attacked, Tenten was left parentless... and money-less. The Civilian Council had locked down all accounts from her access, forcing her to make do with only a minor percentage of her family funds. So, all she had to go on were a small amount of money every month, her family's home and forge and a few memories from her mother and grandma Shigure.

Normally Tenten easily makes do with what she has, despite being every bit as girly as any other teenager, she never was one for recklessly spending money or buying fashion-clothes that she wouldn't wear for more than a week, so it wasn't like it cost her much. In fact, being an accomplished blacksmith herself, it was easy to repair her tools, even if she wasn't that good in making them in the first place.

Except... well, except now, where many of her weapons had been worn beyond her ability to repair them. She'd have to combine them as best as she could and make do with missions and the stipend she was allowed until she could rebuild her collection.

Sparing a look to the forge, she deemed the weapons inside to be hot enough for some good ol' hammerin' time, so she removed them and began wailing away, turning her frustration into action, and a few curses to go with them too.

Slowly, the repeated movements of the hammer, the clanging of metal on metal, the deep, musky scent of sweat and soot, the flickering of flames, the feeling of her muscles burning, it all calmed the girl down and allowed her a smile.

Working on the forge had always been one of her favourite past times. It was... comforting in a way, the same way that a good sword was. Wiping her sweat off, she went to the water tap to wash her hands; she might like the feeling of working up a sweat, but it didn't mean she liked being dirty.

A knocking on her door let her know that there was someone at the door. Sighing, and wondering who it could be since she was on recuperational leave, Tenten took off her smith's apron and went to open the door.

What waited her was a very... short, cloaked person. "Um... can I help you, whoever you are?"

Glasses glinted up at her and she saw a wide, almost insane smile. "You are Higurashi Tenten, yes?" He asked and when she nodded, he stepped in, rudely entering the small courtyard. "Just the person I was looking for. I heard quite a few things about you from Tetsuhi-kun."

"T-Tetsuhi-san? But... who _are_ you?"

The man removed his cloak to reveal an old man, short, with spiky grey-brown hair. "I am Ioh, Konoha's greatest weaponsmith! INSPIRATION IS AN EXPLOSION!" Something exploded in the background.

Meanwhile, Tenten was staring at the short weaponsmith as if he were a Kami come down to bless a lowly mortal like her. "I-Ioh-sama?" She knew who he was, of course, any weapons-user, Konohan or otherwise, should know him!

Quite simply, the greatest smith Konoha ever had. Unfortunately, also notoriously hard to get to talk to. He was also Tenten's second-greatest idol, after Senju Tsunade.

"B-But w-w-why would you want to m-m-meet _me_, Ioh-sama?" The poor, shell-shocked girl asked him, getting a wide grin in return.

"Because, out of all those fools, you are the one who respects my weapons the most! Tetsuhi-kun has often sent your blueprints to me, because he couldn't give them the grandeur your weapons were due! The weapons you were given were more prototypes, early versions of what we could really do." He let the cloak fall to reveal a large sealing scroll marker 'WEAPONS' on the front. "I... have a dream! A world where weapon-users will be respected like any other shinobi! Where ninja will understand the beauty of a blade, the sublime power of a spear! A world where ninjutsu will not be the only way for a ninja to fight, where weapons _will be respected_!"

The passion in the little man's speech made him look as if flames had erupted around him and in his eyes, flames that quickly spread to cover Tenten as well, the girl jumping up happily. "The feeling of strong steel in your hands!"

"The sound of wind split by a good blade!"

"The smell of iron and oil!"

"The reflection of the moon on a well-cleaned blade!"

Now both of them pumped their fists high, shouting as one. "FOR A WORLD OF WEAPONS, THERE IS NOTHING WE WOULDN'T DO!"

"So this is my offer, Tenten-san!" Ioh continued, holding out the scroll. "You will use my weapons, promote them and make them known to all! I will in turn supply you with arms on discount as well as improve your work!"

A poof of smoke issued forth from the scroll and when it cleared, Tenten was almost crying tears of joy. It was _her Mangetsu Shiken_! The chain was a bit longer and shinier than before, more sleek and thin but she could tell it was of far superior craftsmanship than before. On one end of the chain was a steel grip that was covered as if with a basket hilt, a small knife blade on the other side. On the other end of the chain was the head, still as beautiful as she remembered, but this time it was made of three different types of metal, each with its own colorations; a softer, grey-ish material in the inside, a hard, silver edge around it and small 'shadows' or weights of black around it.

"M-Mangetsu Shiken?"

"Yes! Tetsuhi-kun told me when you came with the broken weapon, but I was able to quickly reforge it! The black adornments are not just a very precise weight system, but they also create very specific deflection degrees, which should allow you to throw and have it rebound in the exact way that you wish it, instead of random ricochets!" Divine light seemed to shine on the weapon as he passed it over to the girl and then turned to point at the door, the 'flames' around him and Tenten rikindled. "NOW GO! MY STUDENT! SHOW THEM THE POWER OF WEAPONS! INSPIRATION IS AN EXPLOSION!" A random place spontaneously exploded, though no one seemed to notice...

Somewhere, Gai felt like weeping tears of pride...

**A/N: New chapter and, from now on, I'll be updating less regularly, or even less anyway. The reason is simple; I'M EMPLOYED BABY!**

**Yes, your regular, hopefully-likable, insanely philosophical nutcase of an author has finally gotten a job. At 26 years of YOUTH, it's something to be expected, even if the whole thing sucks. Why does it suck? Well, beyond the lack of insurance (which is a problem in Greece generally), I start work at 12pm. That **_**might**_** let me sleep in a little, but it destroys my afternoons!**

**Soon Guild Wars 2 is coming out and I'm already cursing Greece for being so darn out of the way, preventing me from getting to play in beta. The whole game just looks so... amazing! When it finally comes out, I'm joining, probably as a Mesmer (if they fix clones and phantasms) or a Warrior. Or maybe a Thief. Nah, an Elementalist. Then again, there's always the Necromancer... But the Guardian is awesome too! Damn... Looks like I'll have to wrestle my other two personalities to see which class I'm going to play. *Sigh* Well, you'll be definitely seeing me inside, so as soon as I make a character, I'll be posting the name in a chapter, just so all of us nutcases can meet up, if at all possible. Unite! To the battlements!**

**Well, beyond that, I hope you liked the chapter. Kind of a different setup, an experiment really, much like what was done in the last few chapters of Naruto Genkyouien (which is an AWESOME story by the way). I would also like to remind you, that this story is **_**still**_** up for adoption.**

**Also, I want to make a few rants. **

**A rant against authors who want to write 'fanfiction'... but end up copying the entire world! I'm not saying it's bad to copy the major parts, even minor ones. It's part of the world, the 'mythos', the core of the world. So yeah, they have to stay. But, it's one thing to make a fight where guy A beats guy B, as in canon, and it's a whole other thing to keep **_**the exact damn fight**_** and only changing a few words, **_**if**_** that! And not even 'spells', 'abilities' or 'jutsu', but conversation! There are at least two long fics in my Fav list that have done that; taken a chapter from their canon and freaking **_**copied it word for word**_**! Despite giving new skill sets, despite changing attitudes, relationships, views and knowledge! Despite it all, they didn't even deign to change the **_**minor**_** points of their fights, but copied them exactly! Not even the **_**way**_** the fight ended (see; particular weapon/techniuqe)! But the **_**exact same**_** method of delivery! Example: in canon, villain beats hero with 'sword of doomness +5' to which the hero retaliates by taking it out of his failing body and stabbing the villain. Good? Great! But, here's the crappy fanifction side; despite giving the hero a telekinetic shield, despite giving him intangibility, despite giving him a new way to fight that prevents being in melee combat, the villain **_**still stabs the hero with the same weapon in the same exact way**_**! And the hero follows the **_**exact same**_** retaliation! Not even a variation like 'the hero threw the sword' or 'telekinetically moved the sword' or 'took all the pain inside to use it as fuel to reach a deep meditative state where he commanded the power of the world and brought the freakin' armaggedon'! No; the hero took the sword out, moved at the villain and stabbed him in **_**the exact same damn way**_**! The very **_**purpose**_** of fanfiction is to write something original. I understand that, there come times, where inspiration runs low. That's acceptable, predictable, it happens, we deal with it. But to tell me that, as an author, for all this time you were messing around with the world, not **_**once**_** thought of how you could change an insignificantly small part of a plot point? That, all this time, you never even **_**intended**_** to break from the mould and just wanted to give new names to things? It's like the Naruto stories where Sasuke is cheery and Naruto is broody; the exact damn thing as canon with only a few name changing! People! Be **_**creative**_**! Be **_**unique**_**! **_**Dare**_** to break the mould and make your fic your own! Because, seriously, the next idiot I come across who blatantly copies a world's points in such detail, **_** I'm flaming them**_**! IN REAL LIFE! I will write a review so damning, so scorching, so absolutely bilefull that it's going to become a legend on it's own! So, authors and writers! Get **_**off your asses**_** and make something that is at least **_**marginally**_** different from the original darn it! DO IT OR SOULBLAZER WILL SHOW YOU HOW HE GOT HIS NICKNAME!**

**The next is against the political system of Greece. Apart from the fact we had a political party that was named 'Pirates' (I wonder if they greet with 'Harr me matey, harr harr' and drink rum), we are a complete bloody MESS! The party which gets the most votes (around 34%) gains a free 50 councillors, out of the 300 that comprise our political structure. Then, the rest 250 are split according to their percentages. Supposedly, this is to make sure the first party can make its government without having to submit to other parties and 'ruin' its election campaign's promises. In truth, that just messes things up; the first party still didn't have the 151 councillors it needs to gain the majority of voting, and it couldn't ally with any other party either! The **_**second**_** party, with about 30% of votes, **_**could**_** ally itself with many other left-wing parties to make a government, but, of course, it **_**still**_** wouldn't get enough councillors because there weren't enough to go around; the first party **_**still**_** kept is bonus 50! So, here we come, several days later, still seeing political leaders going around pissing contests and going for a **_**second**_** election. They conveniently forget that, if the same percentages come around again, it would **_**still**_** remain effed-up! They have to change the election laws, but they can't because they can't even agree on the fact that the country's **_**sinking**_** with the kind of crap they're putting us through! Hell, I'm half-contemplating voting for Golder Dawn, the **_**freaking NAZZIS**_**, if I thought they'd get us unstuck from this entire freakin' pit of complete and utter idiocy! I must say, that some times, I'm **_**really**_** disgusted to even be considered of the same basic material as those mules. I sincerely doubt there are words in the human language that can express my disgust, hate and sheer amount of anger I feel towards these... sub-humans. Had I no parents to consider, or a brother to take care of them, I would have taken on a suicide bombing mission to kill all three hundred bastards. Even if I would be a traitor, even if I would be a murderer, I would gladly, with a smile and full understanding of the sin of destruction of life and the infinite possibilities that can come from a life even as pathetic as theirs, do it. I would **_**gladly**_** do it. I would smile as I tortured them. I would laugh as I broke their minds. I would do unspeakable things to them for the insult that is their **_**very existence**_**. Am I a horrible person for this? Am I unjustified? In the end, am I alone in my thoughts? Will there not be someone without my patience and respect to life that will do it? And I fear that, in the end, we will have no choice but the public execution of three hundred people, good and bad, traitors and patriots, honorable and dishonorable, all to make a new start, away from the two, freaking, families that have dictated what this country would do for over fifty years... I fear for the end of democracy, then, if that is what we must do. I fear, I shudder in fear, at the loss of this, last, freedom. In the end, humans were never meant to be free, where they? In the end, when it is our time to make a choice, we always mess things up, don't we? And yet, I still want to hope, but my cynicism is getting stronger, my disgust at the human race grows fiercer and I... I can barely look at another human being without feeling this murderous feeling of despising their very existence strive to gain control of me. Where are we heading, I ask you? Where the bloody nine layers of hell, are we heading?**

**And finally, Diablo 3 came out today. Like everyone, I ran to play the game. Like, about ninety-percent of all gamers out there -you know who you are-, I went to play it through a pirated/copied/illegal copy. Well, not so much illegal, as at a friend's PC, since mine gets stuck when I start WinAmp and Word at the same time, much less play a game heavier than Solitaire. So, there I go, to play the game... And I see it requires an online registration. Damn DRM, I say, but I swallow it, after all, it's a good game, why not buy it original and support the company and all the people who slaved over it? So, since I got paid today too, I head to check out a store... SIXTY EUROS? ARE THEY EFFING SHITTING US? Sixty euros is about ONE EIGHTTH of the monthly payment of most recent employees! I mean, alright, I can understand 'quantity for quality', hell, I expect it! But this? Sixty euros for a single-player game that can be run online after a not-so-successful-but-with-many-people experiment? A game that will last less than fifty hours? You'll be paying more than a euro per hour for your single! **_**And**_** I have to have an online connection on top of it? Well, know what I did? I didn't buy the game. I won't. I'm going to wait, patiently, until someone cracks the DRM. Crackers have been on the job since closed beta, even the 'Friends and Family' thing. How long will it take? A week? A month? Not more until they figure out the algorithms that determine the spawning of monsters and maps. That's it. Lemme tell you; I was prepared to pay 30, even 40-45 Euros for the game. And I know what you'll say, 'but it's only 20 euros difference, what's the big deal'. The big deal is the difference of 20 euros, the difference between "I'm a good worker and I want to be compensated for my work" and "I am a company and I demand that you bow to my will". Piracy started out in music because the prices kept climbing. It proceeded to movies because theaters became too expensive. Now it's in gaming because, quite simply, continent-spanning corporations cannot understand a very simple law: "there is 'offer', there is 'demand' and there's 'people who will be repulsed because of outrageous demands'". So, I give Blizzard about two weeks time before the game is hacked. No protection is foolproof. Only by **_**reducing**_** their prices and giving us quality games will we begin paying for their work. Personally, I **_**wanted**_** to pay. I **_**wanted**_** to reward the game designers who did such a good job. But, thanks to marketing, I will not. I don't care if I never play the game, GW2 is close after all. But, the day Diablo 3 is hacked, I'm going to be laughing my ass off. I'm not a pirate; what games I like, I buy. But I can't, won't, play a game, no matter how good it is, if the company does not respect me as a client. Let's face it people and companies; times, especially in certain countries, are getting rough. We might not make crackers out of our own excrement, but it is obvious to all that money is lining only a particular few pockets. Let us not pay people for more than they are worth. Let us put our foot down and say "It's enough.". Because, sometimes, it is just not good enough to accept things. Sometimes, we must place an embargo if but to show some people that what they attempt to spoon-feed us isn't right. I'm not saying to pirate everything. It's wrong. But, I AM saying that there's dozens of high-quality games that are free or with token prices. Why can they afford it? Why not give them a chance? Why **_**allow**_** companies, in every art, part or domain of our world, command and demand what they will? In the end, why bend over backwards and take it without a complaint? If companies only care about money, then show them your opinions through it. Whether it is donating a freeware programmer or telling your friends that a low-budget game is worth it, **_**do something**_**. Otherwise, nothing will ever change.**

**Review Reply: Stustu**

**Since you have disabled PMs, I feel it necessary to reply here. So here goes:**

***Begin Reply***

**First of all, thanks for the review :D**

**But that is not the reason I write this reply. Instead, in your review, you expressed the desire for a NarutoxKingdoms Of Amalur: Reckoning crossover.**

**The truth is, I am already writing that particular one-shot, naming it 'Sadame no Naruto', which can mean both 'Maelstrom of Fate', linking to the complete mess of Fate Naruto has the tendency of making, as well as 'Naruto of Fate', pointing to the usage of Fate power that would come from this fic.**

**However, as we all know, every time I try to write a one-shot, I seem to gather enough replies begging for a second, or third, fourth etc, part. While I am not bothered at all by that, the truth of the matter is that I'll be getting a job soon, so I can't exactly devote as much time as I want to fanfictioning (is that a word?). I'd have very much liked to make a full story out of it, but for now it's just going to be a one-shot, if I ever even complete it.**

**So, when I read your review, I wanted to contact you with a very specific mission in mind; if I write some parts of the one-shot, would you write the rest? Or, even, would you make it into a story?**

**Unfortunately, you have disabled PMs so I couldn't contact you except through this Author's Note. Here's to hoping you activate the messaging service so I can send the file over and you can turn it from a half-finished one-shot into a worthy story!**

***End Reply***

**OMAKE CORNER**

**Book of Culinary Horrors**

Yamanaka Inoichi was a very talented psychologist, it was natural for him considering his family's mind-affecting powers.

And like any professional psychologist and psychiatrist, he kept an archive of most of his cases, at least the serious ones. Naruto's recent brush with delusionary psychosis was considered quite serious, not to mention very important from a scientific point of view, after all none has ever before made so many clones as to fracture their own minds, not to this extent.

So, after each counseling, he took the child's drawings and writings, illegible though they were, and archived them in his home. In the end, he bound them to a book, arranging them by the point in time on which they were made.

Still, he rarely read them, for the drawings were disturbing to the mind, they seemed to move and writhe their tentacle-like forms. Pictures seemed to have been made with more detail than should be possible for something that small, he could still discern each exact letter and symbol of a perfect replica of a three-square-inch large drawing of a book! And the words, he didn't know if it was in another language, but every time he tried to pronounce them in an approximation of their own, his very _mind_ rebelled and tried to stop him from uttering them!

So the book was sealed and forgotten, placed in high-level and security seals and then put into the underground ANBU storage facility, just in case Naruto exhibited such symptoms again.

But Naruto never had a repeat of such an incident and Inoichi, as a good doctor, kept all archives and notices to himself until the day he passed on.

So the Book was placed and forgotten as time passed, years went by and the continents shifted...

A young archeologist and paranormal investigator now stands before an ancient crypt. Scrolls, somehow preserved through the millenia of this tomb's existed, point to a race of beings with animals for faces and supernatural psychokinetic powers, such as pyrokinesis, teleportation and even the creation of life!

"Be careful! Not so many explosives! We want to open the door, not blow the mountain up!" He screams as he waves the pyrotechnicians to take more care. The Fan Corporation's the leaders in terms of fires and explosions, but sometimes they got too... excited with their jobs. You couldn't find better people to shape an explosion though; sometimes he wondered if those guys could actually breathe fire even!

_**BOOOM!**_ The door's hinges explode and the whole building shudders, but it holds on. The arcane symbols on it seem to glow for a moment, telling the archaeologist that eldritch forces are at work to preserve this artefact!

Oh how he shudders at what he will find inside! Rituals? Artifacts? Proof of the Void between Worlds? Dangerous creatures, the awakening of the Old Gods?

Torch in hand, he walks in carefully, eyes peering through the dark. There are ruins and writings here, but there is something _calling_ him... something more... profound, primal!

Deeper and deeper, where the sun's rays no longer tread, where priests and angels alike would fear to even gaze, the archaeologist walks with a purpose...

Until, at last, he finds it! A book, large and leatherbound, ancient mystical symbols on it glowing and keeping it safe from the ravages of time. With shaking hands he opens it and his mind opens with it, to a reality far different than his own...

Three months later, a new book can be seen in stores...

_**The Ramenomicon By P.H. Hatedismantle  
><strong>_

* * *

><p><strong>Today, on this 96/2012, I, Soulblazer87, do hereby leave this site, possibly forever.**

**I shall not update this, or any other story.**

**I shall leave them on, however. Should you desire to follow my stories, do so in my new site of residence: www dot yourfanfiction dot com.**


	17. Chapter 17  Chapter and Author

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE:_**

**_Please note, that this is, without a doubt, lie or exaggeration, the LAST chapter of Leaf Style Maelstrom to be published in this site. This choice has been made for some time now, and it will NOT change. This update is made to notify my readers of this event. In truth, this chapter has been published in its new home for quite some time. For following chapters, look for me in Y-O-U-R-F-A-N-F-I-C-T-I-O-N ( removes it...) and, later on, in Archive of Our Own. This is not a joke. This is not a trick. This is my choice, a choice that some of you might have ignored or thought was fake. It is not. As I have stated in every single chapter of this story; this site's actions have forced me to do such a move._**

**_On a happier note; Guild Wars 2 has been launched, and I am on it, of course. You can look for me and my guild 'Semper Enim Imaginatio' as 'Lord Soulblazer', 'Artun Lansherr', 'Illuviatar' and 'Skadi Thrymson'. Feel free to join a guild for all us Authors. Currently, I am in Aurora Glade, an EU Server, usually online between 01:00 and 11:00 p.m. GMT. Naturally, I'm looking for lieutenants that'll take care for the other servers, as a guild CAN exist in more than one server, not to mention each character (the whole account in fact) can belong to more than one guild, but represent only one at a time._**

**_Anyway, that's all, hope to see you and hear from you all. My apologies for your inconvenience._**

_Chapter 17: Homesick Trees_

"Naruto-kun, do you understand your mission?" Sarutobi asked his favourite gennin from his place on the bed. They had spent quite a few hours talking and explaining things to the blonde.

Namely that Sarutobi was in no way able to continue on being Hokage. Truth be told, he had been far from being a prime candidate for some time now, but with the last fight on Orochimaru, it became painfully obvious that a replacement had to be found -and that wasn't Naruto, not yet anyway.

The young nature-lover of course apologized for putting his 'jii-chan' through it all, but the tired man simply waved it off and said that it was already time to 'get all those days off racked up after sixty years of constant service, and a nice bottle of sake too, darn it!'.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it..." Naruto shuffled his feet from the seat he was still too short to sit on. "Don't mean I like it! You said I'd get the had from you, old man! Don't back on your promises now, you get it? It _has_ to be you who gives me the hat, not just any Hokage'll do!" He declared with an accusing finger and an enthusiasm he wasn't really feeling.

For his part, the still-recovering old man laughed. That boy never failed to relieve him of his many burdens. Whether it was a prank, a new insanity or just the way he treated him like a normal human being, it was always so refreshing to get to talk to the boy. "Oh, don't worry about the hat, Naruto-kun, I'm sure the new Hokage will have another one made, so I guess you can keep mine." He knew it wasn't what the blonde was talking about, but he had to understand that, often, things didn't go as we want them to. That, sometimes, bonds break even when no one wants them to.

The boy had recovered well, truth be told, but he wasn't all there yet. Sometimes, it just seemed as if Naruto would black out, mumbling incoherently, before, just as suddenly, snapping back and continuing his previous avenue of actions as if no time had passed. Quite frankly it was scary, but Inoichi had assured them that it was to be expected; Naruto still suffered from freak occurences even now, where his brain's very synapses would misfire thanks to the sheer trauma he went through.

Still, the Sandaime supposed, things were going better than he had feared when the invasion occured. As a Hokage, he looked not only into how he would fight through that fight with Orochimaru, but also how his village would fair after it. And it had _not_ been promising. It was his ongoing tenure as Hokage alone that had kept many enemies of Konoha from encroaching into their lands, or some of Konoha's greedier people from trying to bite off more than they could chew. Not just that, but the many Councils of Konoha would be in unrest had he died, which would have indubitably caused undue strain in their relations and more than a few attempts at usurping or eliminating power bases.

In short; it would have been Hell for the next Hokage, to the point that, if it were Tsunade, it would never be fixed.

In times of great stress, people and organizations tend to go berserk, requiring a single, all-powerful figure to manage them. Had the Hokage fallen, there would have been chaos, and not of the kind Naruto usually unleashed with his pranks.

So now, there he was sending poor little Naruto off, not even fully healed yet, in a mission that should by all means be considered impossible, if not an S-ranked. Mission Objective; locate Senju Tsunade and have her return to Konoha to take up the mantle as Hokage. Three impossibles in one measly sentence. Tsunade was every bit a Sannin; she might not be sneaky like Orochimaru or slippery like Jiraiya, but she had her fair share of ways to avoid detection. She also had a hatred for her home village, living a vagrant's life to avoid going back, so many years after the tragedies of her life. And lastly, she detested the very position of Hokage, an extremely ironic fact considering that her Grandfather and Great Uncle had taken the mantle as Shodai and Nidaime. Even more ironic since it was what her little brother Nawaki and lover Dan had dreamed of.

But, as the old man knew, hate him or love him, everyone eventually fell to the endless charisma his lovable if insane adopted grandson had.

Maybe that boy would finally set fire once more to the smouldering coals of Tsunade's soul.

"Anyway, jiji! There's something I need to show you, at my warehouse." Naruto piped up, interrupting the old ninja's thoughts. "But it's a secret, can you keep a secret? 'Cause, jiji, love you an' all, but I don't want no other ninja snoopin' around in my greenhouse, dattebayo! It's bad for my pretties! Makes them all worried and yellow!"

Well, taking a mild walk in the veritable jungle that was Naruto's greenhouses would be just what the doctors ordered. After all, clean air, greenery, calming scents and all that, right? What could go wrong?

For an unknown reason, Sarutobi felt an odd chill down his back at that thought. Oh, great, he thought, he just _had_ to jinx it, didn't he?

A few minutes later found Naruto in front of the heavy, wooden doors that served as entrance to the Grove. Now that he thought about it, it had been many years since he last came around, he supposed the last time was when he handed over the deed and had the workers set up the large walls. The doors opened without Naruto even touching them but there was no one to do it, and Sarutobi used all his senses to detect any personnel.

But as soon as Naruto closed the doors behind them, this time by hand, the boy turned to look at his leader with a serious eye. "We're going to see my pretties, ji-chan. You are going to see my pretties for the _very first time_. Now, listen properly! Adress the Queen of Thorns as 'Queen' or 'Majesty'. She is the only one who sits on a throne. Do not rush Hawthorn or Oberon, be patient and wait for them to finish talking and _never _interrupt them. Whatever Titania-chan does, take it with many pinches of salt and laugh with it, don't curse or try to hurt her, you _will not_ like the results. There might be Thrall and his Orks there too, but I'm not sure 'cause they don't like the council. If they are; do not look down at them, do not conceal _all_ your weapons, do not show obvious weakness, and for all that is holy, do not show all your teeth; they consider it a challenge actually."

"Wait, wait a second Naruto-kun!" The old man stopped the blonde from his roll, even as they walked. "You are talking about your pretties, right? Plants, yes? So, forgive this senile old man, but, last time I heard, plants... do not make _conversations_..."

They had stopped outside what seemed as a naturally-formed globe made out of a single, curled leaf, with what appeared to be a door and handle in the form of a circular, yellow-colored wooden portal, it even seemed to be formed of many swirling blocks of wood that made up the Uzumaki swirl, if a bit more complicated.

"That's because, jiji, I am the most surprising person in Konoha for a _reason_." Naruto spoke and pressed the yellow orb in the center of the door, causing the wooden parts to retreat to the sides and 'open' the door.

It was a throne room.

Made of wood and moss rather than stone and cloth, but it was a throne room none the less. Sarutobi realized that it wasn't a sphere so much as a cylinder; the top was open to let the sunlight in, refracted around magnificently through colored lenses that hung in the air by gossamer strings, the lenses themselves even seemed to be of plant origin, as if someone had taken the cells of a leaf and magnified it hundreds of times over.

To either side of the throne were two giant trees, but Sarutobi could tell they were not _trees_, after all, trees _don't have eyes_! One had bright green and the other deep blue, both large and wise and with a brilliant intellect shining through them. Even the bark seemed to take after a face, after a little bit he could discern a nose, lips and even cheekbones. The one on the right had even arms, gnarly and thick-barked, a large walking stick in one of them. The walking stick alone was more than a dozen feet long.

And upon the center, when Sarutobi laid his eyes upon it, sat one of the, if not outright _the_, most beautiful woman he had ever beheld. Aristocratic, sharp lines on her face, yet full characteristics. Lips as red as fresh blood, yet a touch darker, as if hinting to something _deeper_. Black hair, artfully decorated with jewelry that seemed to sparkle like stars in her night-sky mane. Dark, entrancing eyes, almost as if windows to an abyss warm and all-encompassing. Dark skin, though not black, but more that of carefully oiled wood, aged to perfection. Her form, covered by a long, see-through gown that somehow managed to cling to her every curve and yet still flutter as if to an invisible wind. On her wrists, ankles and brow were jewelry that glinted as if silver, but he could tell it was not.

"So... you bring him... at... last..." The left 'tree' spoke slowly, breezily and with a tone that spoke of many hours of thought upon even a simple greeting. "I... am... Hawthorn... Oldest of the Ents... and it is... an honor... to meet you... Hokage Sarutobi Hiruzen..."

"I am honored as well, Hawthorn-dono." Sarutobi replied almost mechanically, still unable to fully comprehend what his eyes were telling him they saw. _'I wonder if Inoichi-kun would believe me if he mind-dived, or if he made an altar to Naruto-kun...'_ "And... you must be Oberon-dono," He nodded towards the tree to his _right_ this time, seeing its features distort to a smile. "And you, my lady, must be the Queen of Thorns."

"It seems... our Maker... spoke to you... of us... We were... half-afraid... he would forget... again."

"O-Oberon! I didn't really mean to do it _that_ time! It was a mistake! And we had Titania-chan!" Naruto pouted indignantly at the teasing tone.

"Yes, yes it was, My King," The woman spoke and her lilting tone would have made Sarutobi in the height of his love to his wife look at the Queen again. "and you are correct, Hokage-dono, we are as you identified us."

Before she could say anything more, or rather before she was even half-way through, a tiny being shot up from underneath Oberon's many moss-covered branches. It was small, only a few inches tall, and female. She wore a long white sundress but no shoes that he could discern. Not that she would need them; she had wings instead, four, thin, gossamer wings that beat incessantly. Her large bright-gold eyes and golden hair made the little thing as bright as _Naruto_. "Someone call my name? I'm Titania the Great! Tricks and Pranks are my mate! Oh! The pervy old man!" She tittered as she flitted, very fast for such a small crreature, around a stupefied Sarutobi. "Tell me! Did you like your signing time? Did you?"

"T-That was _you_?!" Sarutobi spluttered before he could stop himself, that damn prank had caused the Hokage Tower endless misery! Someone had placed ink-proof crayon on the signing area of his paperwork, making the ink slide off! He was forced to do his paperwork _a second time_! Still, remembering Naruto's cautioning, and not really wanting to know how dangerous a creature that could sneak into the Hokage Tower's archives undetected could be, he forced himself to think it from a prankster's perspective and laugh. "Yes, it was very funny, Titania-dono, but next time, do it on Tuesdays; Mondays have way too much paperwork, I don't want to be forced to sit inside longer than I have to." Guilt-tripping, with a small allowance for controlled pranking, always seemed to work on Naruto.

"Ah!" The little being slammed a fist onto her palm. "So I made you stay _in_? Aaaah! And here I had thought you'd have told all those _other_ guys to do it for you, you know the ones you actually _hire_ to do it! I mean, they sit inside all day anyway, why do you let them read naughty books and play card games?"

And so Sarutobi was introduced to Titania's unique sense of showing people when they make a mistake; prank them and then tell them how they could have avoided it. Don't be tricked; it wasn't to make the lesson stick, but because Titania wanted to have fun.

Sarutobi on the other hand coughed uncomfortably, at least, judging by the sympathetic look the Queen sent him, he hadn't been the only one to be caught in such a trap. "Y-You are correct it seems, Titania-dono, I will fix that problem quickly." And indeed he would, he was the Hokage darn it!

"Two!" Titania giggled loudly, holding up two fingers.

"Two?"

"Two! Two pranks!" She gave him a wide smile that, despite being cheerful, somehow made Sarutobi fear for his sanity. "You call me '-dono'! That's respectful! Respect means responcibility!" The little being shuddered comically, she seemed to buzz in place. "I don't like responcibility, that's why I gave mine to the old hag over there!" And, of course, she pointed to the Queen of Thorns.

If there was ever a woman that could appear at the same time hauntingly beautiful and absolutely, totally willing to inflict grievous torture, the Queen was that woman.

Jiraiya would have loved to meet her!

"I... see, then how should I adress you, Titania-san?" The old Hokage knew to be respectful, even when hinted that he shouldn't be. Unknowingly, it increased the respect the tiny being had for him; Titania might hate titles and posturing, but on the other hand, unless specifically stated that she allowed someone to call her in a friendly way, it aroused her anger. In short; she might keep the doors unlocked, but you did not want to enter unless invited.

"Titania-chan's fine! And don't worry, I'll wait a bit for my pranks, don't want you all ready and waiting for them!" Her declaration was rather obviously _not_ calming for the old man's poor heart pressure.

"Yes, be that as it may," The Queen stopped the hyperactive little being. "there _is_ a very particular reason why Hokage-dono has been presented before us, even if Thrall and his... kin are not here." There was a disdain in her voice about Thrall's kin, but as he had not met them, the Sandaime made a note not to tread on that little part of things.

"Yep, yep, yep!" Naruto agreed, nodding fast enough to make his ears flap, before hopping up next to the Queen. "See, old man, you wanted to know about my pretties! So I brought you here so you can properly meet them!"

"And that is a very good thing, my King." The Queen agreed. "But first you must explain _what_ we are, before he can understand _who_ we are."

"Right! So, I guess I start in chruno... chronu... chro... In the order I made them anyway!" Naruto laughed off his own inability to say 'chronological' and sat down. "First, you probably know I've been in the Forest of Death, right? Ah, no, it's not a dangerous place, when you _avoid_ trouble rather than head towards it! And there was this crazy snake lady who helped out when some animals wouldn't leave me alone. Anyway! Deep, deep in the forest, further than even the tower, there's this weird place, it had a very strange feeling, but it was cool! It glowed all green and had these _amazing_ flowers and trees! It was kinda hard to find though, 'cause it kept changing doors and stuff, and sometimes you'd get lost. But it was great!"

_'Secret place that changed place, inside the Forest of Death? Is it... is it possible Naruto-kun found out the Shodai's resting place? The one place in Konoha that none could find?'_ As one of the Shodai's students, even if it was through his younger brother, Sarutobi had been one of the many who had looked for the entrance to the fabled 'Eternal Grove', the place where the Shodai was reputed to have learned how to use his Mokuton. The place he was also interred by his own wife, Uzumaki Mito, she too, entering that tomb on her own to get to her final sleep.

The 'Eternal Grove' was also supposed to be the same as another mythological place... _Shikkotsurin_. A place of Natural Chakra, where one could become a sage, and only a sage could find his way to it. A shard of the original 'Rin'ne Tenkyuuden', the 'Heavenly Palace Of The Circle Of Life'. A spiritual place where the Rikkudo Sennin had, mythologically, trained in, shattered in three different parts so that no one would ever again hold the power to reshape reality and offend the Kami.

So many had scoured Konoha and all the lands around the village, trying to find the Eternal Grove, but none ever found it. And yet, Naruto probably _had_.

"Anyway!" The blonde continued unabashed. "I took many samples from there and crossed them with plants I could find from here, and it was great! I made so many new plants! They were all so pretty! But..." Now the boy looked downcast, getting a gentle pat on his shoulder from the stunning Queen. "I didn't have any friends and... as much as I might have talked to my plants and flowers and bushes... I... they never talked back... So... So I tried harder! I gave my chakra, my blood, everything I could! Watered them in my blood and fed them my chakra, carefully crossbreeding each and every plant I had, using the many plants I found in that cave that could actually _move_. It... It took me three years, but I had done it!"

"And thus... I... was... born..." Hawthorn stated. "I... and... Oberon... are the... oldest... of the... Greenborn... We are... but... four years... old..." The gigantic tree spoke slowly, its deep voice making the earth rumble beneath the old man's feet.

"F-Four years? Excuse my ignorance, but... Hawthorn-dono, you appear to be _much_ bigger than a four-year tree."

"Indeed... and... I keep... my body... small... so as... to not... frighten you... Hokage... dono..." The tree crinkled its wooden face in a genial smile. "I can... be... over... two... hundred... feet... tall... when I... want to..."

"Yup, yup! Hawthorn-kun here can become big or small, or even from a different plant altogether when he wants!" Naruto nodded, explaining it to the stunned Hokage. "But he usually keeps to this size; he'd be too big otherwise! After Hawthorn-kun was rooted," Rooted probably meant 'born', the old man surmized. "came Oberon-kun!" He waved towards the walking stick-bearing tree. "Oberon-kun is a Treant! The _first_ Treant! Ents and Treants are pretty much the same, but Treants can _walk_! And Oberon-kun can also change his size, but not his shape. That's why he's so small, he can be almost as big as Hawthorn-kun!"

_'Small... he calls a fourty-feet-tall tree 'small'... Okay, I knew that Naruto had a few problems with comparisons, what with thinking his chakra reserves were 'normal' for his age, but this is a bit too much, ain't it?'_ "I... I see, Naruto-kun... This is truly a... a miracle!" And it was! If Konoha's citizens could just _see_ what Naruto had done, the miracle that he had uniquely brought to reality, how could they ever claim that he was anything but a great person?

_'But of course they wouldn't believe Naruto-kun... They would say that the Kyuubi used its powers to corrupt Nature or somesuch idiocy...Oh, Naruto-kun, how can I help them open their eyes to the wonderful person that you are?'_

"When Oberon-kun started walking, I _knew_ I was on the right track! So I worked harder and harder, and in the end, I did it! The Queen was born!" He jumped for joy, remembering the day the large, red flower had bloomed and his first Dryad had walked out.

"It was truly a magnificent day..." Even the Queen had a look of absolute _rapture_ on her face. "Do you know how it is to perceive a world out there, but unable to interact? To listen to your fellow beings telling you 'patience, be patient', and having been forced to live isolated from the world, unable to see, taste or feel? And then... _beauty_! _Magnificence_! Light! Green and blue and red and everything in-between! Scents, sweet and bitter, musky and flowery! Taste, so strong that it resounds in your mind like a thousand myriad dawns all at the same time! Sounds, hearing the rustle of leaves and teetering of birds and buzzing of insects after an eternity of absolute silence! And _touch_!" She almost shook at that moment, shivering violently. "To _feel_, to _touch_, your very body _singing_ at every sensation, so strong that even the worst of pain would be absolute pleasure after an existence inside that void!" The woman calmed herself down quickly, but a hint of that rapture, of the first waking, remained in her eyes. "No, Hokage-dono, you do not, you _cannot_, understand the gift our King has given us. For that, we are _all_ his most loyal subjects."

"I don't need subjects, and you know it! I wanted _friends_! _Family_! And you're all that! And more!" Naruto turned indignantly to the woman and she gently, calmingly caressed his face, much like Kushina herself would have done, had she lived long enough to do it.

"I know my King," She soothed him. "but regardless of if you had merely wanted us as slaves or possessions, we would still have been loyal to you, forever."

"And then _we_ came!" Titania interjected, all this mushy-mushy, look-into-each-other's-eyes scenes were getting to her! Celebrations are meant to be with drinks and stories and, mostly, pranks, not looking at someone's eyes for _ages_! That was _boring_!

Luckily, and as expected from the little being, Naruto's attention was quickly brought to the next part of the tale. "Yeah! After the Queen was born from that tree, she and Oberon-kun and Hawthorn-kun helped me experiment more, and make me _more_ friends and _more_ family!" The Sandaime looked down at this, realizing how far Naruto would have gone for even a hint of family or friendship. He had truly failed the boy, hadn't he? "With their help, Titania-chan was born from the blossom of a lily flower!"

"We're the Trixies! And don't you forget it!" The little trixie piped up in a manner _way_ too similar to Naruto's.

"I... I see... And the Orks?"

This time, he saw the same disdain in the Queen's eyes as when she spoke of Thrall and his kin, but also, since he had been paying attention this time, a great sadness and dissapointment.

"My people, Hokage-dono, are only female." The Queen spoke. "There are no men, no males, to polinate our ovaries and procreate. Of all my children, I am the only one who can reproduce, the only one who can keep our race alive... Long-lived we might be, owing to our inanimate roots, but eternal we are not... Only _I_ can reproduce with the help of my King, only _he_ can pollinate my ovaries, because it was _his_ blood that birthed me, and I am able to embrace his genes into mine, to bring forth a new Dryad."

"Yeah, like Bereth-chan said," The name was different, but judging by her, it was probably another name for 'Queen' or something like that. At any rate, the old man wouldn't use it unless expressedly allowed. Even if he had been in his prime, he had the feeling that this place was alive and beating and _conscious_. It would not be smart to challenge someone who can absolutely control the environment to their will. Especially not when you're right in the middle of that environment. "there are no male Dryads. Dunno why, maybe because the tree Bereth-chan came from was female, maybe because _I_am male, but there are no male Dryads. So I need to give my blood and a lot of chakra for Bereth-chan to make a new Dryad."

"So they are like your daughters?" The old man inquired, getting a lilting laugh from the Dryad Queen, quickly followed by the rest of the plant-based beings. And a blush from Naruto.

"Absolutely not, Hokage-dono..." She spoke amidst giggles after she calmed down a bit. "Not unless you would believe that a daughter would try molest her father on an hourly basis." The giggles finally stopped, but the smile remained. "You cannot understand what touch means to us Dryads; it is our greatest _pleasure_. So we constantly seek to engage in it, to push the feelings even higher." Her smile turned sultry in a way that made even his old body shudder in remembered times. "We are Dryads, we do not have your pointless laws and taboos. And what pleasure is there that sings louder than the very reason your body was built for?"

"S-S-So Naruto-kun is...?" The old man stuttered as he looked at the blushing boy.

"E-Ero-jiji..." He mumbled. "How do you think I got that good in avoiding your ninja? Neira-chan and the others can transport themselves from tree to tree in an instant, do you have any idea how hard it is to maintain my... v-v-virginity?!"

The old man was torn between feeling sorry or feeling jealous of the boy.

Then someone happened and he made up his mind.

Because, apparently having heard her name, a stunning girl appeared from the side, running towards the boy and promptly glomping him. "Naruto-kuuuun!" Her voice was befit for angels, so much like the Queen's but warm and bubbly where hers was court and aristocratic. Sparing a better look at her, Sarutobi saw the wild, fire-red mane of hair cascading down the Dryad's back, her perfectly proportioned, fair-colored body, with just a hint of light green on the skin. And when she turned, her face was just as beautiful, with blood-red, full lips and bright green, almost glowing, eyes. "Come with me, I've prepared my room especially for today-mmmh!"

Vines seemed to come alive from all around the red-haided girl and quickly wrapped around her body, pulling her back as she struggled to get a grip back on the still-dizzy Naruto.

"Aaaah... when will this girl finally learn to control herself..." A gruff, growling voice came from behind the Hokage, making him turn to look at the speaker, and promptly gape. "Then I could just go back to taking tiger-naps in peace and quiet..."

It was a being... a being he could not identify. It was large, as large as a tiger and shaped much the same. But instead of black and yellow fur, he had green and black-brown. Green eyes, almost swirling as if they were liquid, but shining with a bright cunning and intellect. Even the claws were wood; he could see the roots bury into the ground with each step. What was even more unexpected, was that it was... _familiar_... As if he had seen the being somewhere else...

"Ah! Tora-chan! How have you been!" Naruto exclaimed and Sarutobi made a double-take. _'That's the long-lost Daimyo's pet, Tora? As in Demon Cat Tora? What in the Kamis happened?!'_

"Humph... Busy, babysitting this girl takes up all my time... I should not have shown my ability to track her down regardless of her tricks, then I would be sleeping in my chair instead of running after her..."

"And that is my firstborn daughter, Neira." The Queen interjected the Hokage before he could get a word in. "She is... most taken with our king... I think this is already the tenth try to bed him, today only... She still has her record to break; that was about fifteen tries in an hour, though if I were to read your eyes correctly, my dear daughter, you seem more than determined to break that record..." She smiled at her daughter, who was still struggling to free herself.

"Of course I am!" The girl spoke as she finally freed her mouth from a pestering vine. "Naruto-kun will be mine and I will share him with all my sisters and we will feel pleasure beyond pleasure and we will keep him among us forever and no one will hurt him or hog him again and-mmmph! MMMH! MMPHH!"

_'Where have I seen that again? Oh, right, she's just like Konohamaru-kun, I'd better make sure those two never meet or...'_ He couldn't even finish his thoughts, so horrible they were.

Meanwhile, Tora had taken a lie-down in front of the Queen's legs, like a large, furry (or in this case leaf-y) carpet. Privately, the Sandaime felt that he'd gladly take the tiger's place if he could be that close to the Queen...

"Now calm yourself, daughter, do you not see we have guests? Behave yourself for now, please."

Finally the girl noticed the old man and, freeing herself from another moving vine, greeted him happily. "Hiii! I'm Neira! Say, can you untie me so I can get Naruto-kun to my chambers and-mmMMPH! MMMH! MM-No fair! You never let me seduce anyone, Mother!"

"Mostly because if Hokage-dono was seduced by _you_ daughter and all your... renowned... self-control, he wouldn't make the day." The Queen deadpanned, stopping her daughter's struggles, as if Neira had just realized the age of the guest. "Now, we were talking about my peoples' inability to procreate, yes?"

Naruto, having finally managed to get his bearings back, along with a chair that seemed to have spontaneously grown from the ground while Sarutobi wasn't looking, shook his head. "Uhh... yeah, yeah we were... Umm... Orks... Yeah, orks, orks were rooted when we tried to make male Dryads." Naruto began, getting interrupted by Neira's promise that _'you're the only one for us Naruto-kun, no other man would ever touch us as deep-mmmh!'_ before continuing, uncomfortable at the twinkle in the older man's eyes. He had seen that twinkle before, and every time the old man made someone have a mental break down. "But, no matter what tree we tried, it was always a female Dryad that was born so... so we tried something else..."

"Fungi." The Queen stated, distastefully. "Genetically removed from us so that my biology would not lock their gender and allow for our King's gender to take... Unfortunately... it didn't work as we expected..."

"Orks are much like the Dryads, but they are all male." Naruto stated. "And angry. Really angry, all the time."

"Orks cannot survive without their anger, in fact." The Queen spoke again. "Their bodies need the, well, plant-based adrenaline equivalent, they generate from fighting. If they cannot fight, they wilt and die. But, even in death they do not really _die_."

"All my pretties have very strong genetic memories, jiji." Naruto explained. "Genetic memory is when you remember something that your ancestor did, without you ever experiencing it. All Greenborn can do it, but in the case of Orks it's... it's much, _much_ stronger..."

"And they are also much, _much_ less smart than you and I." The Queen interrupted, her tone annoyed and angry. "They end up not quite identifying the difference between their current life and their previous one... They actually think they are immortal, even if you kill one, those born of its body will have all the memories, and think themselves the same person."

"Usually that means they kill each other, but, you see, Orks are like mushrooms; they reproduce by spores. They always shed spores, but when they die, they shed even more. So, even if you kill one, there are probably dozens of others that will eventually take root."

"Are they dangerous?" The old man asked, worried what a race of berserking warrior horde that never ended could do. It would make a war to end all wars, a war they might not survive, as a race!

"Umm... no, not really... Orks generally kill each other all the time." Naruto stated, uncomfortable. "Also, they're really strong, but they don't have any ambitions beyond fighting strong enemies. And Thrall-kun is different from other Orks, so he keeps them together."

"Yes... Thrall is at least smarter than his... kin." The Queen came back. "He understands that, if his people keep up like that, they will either destroy each other or they will band everyone else to destroy them. Regardless of their strength, not even all the orks as one would be able to take on all the villages, especially since we would be aiding them. So he is trying to... civilize them, for a lack of better word. Thrall is... admirable, in maintaining his position and strength, even as he tries to shape his people into something more than cunning animals with tools and a bad disposition..."

"But still our best attempts at creating male Dryads failed, so it's kind of a sore spot for them..."

"Not like we wanted ta be one o' ya damn panzees!" A deep, baritone voice filled the dome, making the Sandaime tense as he turned to see the newcomer.

It was green. Deep green, vaguely humanoid in shape, but the proportions... they were all wrong. Its muscles were too thick, bulging and with popping veins. Nails that were more like broken claws. Biceps as thick as Sandaime's torso. A small head with a sloping forehead, jutting jaw and, damn, those were some _big_ tusks! He wore mis-matched armor of bark

**A/N: Finally an update, damn, there had been days where I couldn't get even a single line out. Damn I hate working! Why can't we all just spend days watching anime, playing games and having fun? All ye underage people; trust me, enjoy it while it lasts! Highschool's the greatest time of your life, I made the mistake of not taking advantage of it and now I wish life had Save/Load routines!**

**On us going for Guild Wars 2: I promote the use of the Jade Sea server as a tribute to Factions. However, I have no problem regardless of which server I go in. Just, keep in mind, that since I'm in Europe, I can't join an American one. Though I might be able to come over and visit; I actually did that in Factions, I think. So, who's up for making a guild full of RP'ing story-tellers that also kick their fair share of centaur behinds? Once the characters are set, don't forget to PM each other so we can meet and set up our friend lists!**

**Also, as you saw, I'm slowly introducing the Greenborn to the world. So far there have been very little signs of them, but soon they'll take a more active role.**

On the characters; Naruto and Sasuke were hopefully realistic, even as Naruto recovers from his insanity. The whole 'See sound, hear sight' thing is a state called 'synesthesia', which you can read up in Wikipedia. In Naruto's case, instead of melding two senses, he swapped them. Also, Sakura is finally getting some limelight, even if it's not all that much and Hanabi's plans begin to grow! What will the terrible pint-sized Hyuuga do next? And why does everyone keep underestimating her?

**OMAKE CORNER**

**One Small Change**

Jiraiya sighed as he looked over the recovering Uchiha boy. Damn the kid had suffered, it was really unfair for a child to go through all that shit in his life. Hadn't been exactly that the reason why he, himself, had fought so hard for? So that no one else would be forced to have their family ripped from them, their dreams shattered, their lives ruined?

And now, Jiraiya the Gallant, as he tries to convince everyone that he is, looks down on yet another tragic figure. A figure so much like his own former best friend.

_'Orochimaru... Why? What made you change like that, betray us like that? Had we meant nothing to you, was everything we went through together nothing but a lie? Why 'Rochi? I know you were my friend once, I know you called me your friend and _meant_ it... I could see it in your eyes, back then... What was it that changed you? What... what was it that hurt you so much...'_ Jiraiya wonders as he looks over the barely-breathing boy. _'Heh, were it the old days, I'd have told you to go get laid or something to send away all the stress and loneliness...- wait, what!?'_

Suddenly startled by his own thoughts, Jiraiya looks as if enlightenment had hit him with a sledgehammer. _'Get laid, of course! It always helps out, works out all the emo-ness right out of ya! But who? Who could I trust... Of course, that girl Naruto told me about, Haku! And I know how to find her... Hehehe, poor boy, if what I saw of the way she looked at you was right, you're in for a _very_ wild time!'_

And with that, Jiraiya the Gallant, often called 'ero-sennin', leapt off into the shadows, after calling a few ANBU to look over the kid. He had a missing-nin to find, and it had already been a couple of days since she left, best to follow the trail before the 'rain' washes it away completely.

...

Opening his eyes felt like swimming through molasses; it was slow, painful and absolutely _exhausting_, but he had to.

There had been no way for him to know how much time had passed, how many hours,days,weeks,months,years,decades,eons,millenia- ok, so it _hadn't_ been millenia, but still...

So he opened his eyes and, like the seasoned shinobi hat he was, he began to evaluate his environment.

Large, unadorned windows with white curtains. Unfomfortably hard bed. Annoying beeping sounds. Completely white walls. Stale stench of medicine and blood and white spirits.

He was in a hospital. Judging by the branches of the tree next to his window, he was not higher than the fourth floor, but higher than the first. Going by the rule of the middle, he was probably in the second floor. It was midday, the shadows were too short, but whether it was before or after, he couldn't tell.

The door opened slowly and a figure entered quietly before closing it slowly.

And Sasuke felt his body freeze up.

Low, soft-soled shoes. White panty-hose and garterbelt that came up long, smooth, toned legs. A very, _very_ short white mini-skirt, with a slit to the side that showed part of the garterbelt. A tight, white blouse with buttons undone top and bottom, revealing a perfectly toned tummy and growing cleavage. A white cap with a red cross sitting on midnight-black hair on an angelic face.

"Good morning, Uchiha-kun, I am nurse Haku and you will be in my care for the day." She _purred_ at the still-shocked boy, a dainty hand softly running along the edge of the door, freezing it solid and closed.

When she _stalked_ forward like a predator, hips swaying left and right to reveal parts of her creamy legs, eyes half-lidded and darkening by the second, Sasuke found _himself_ frozen, in a whole _new_ way.

"H-H-H-Ha-Hak-Haku-"

He went no further as Haku bent forward, nose touching his. "Shhh, you should not say anything more, just let Nurse Haku take care of you... Besides, you're going to need _every bit of scream_ you still have in you... I intend to _coax_ it _all_ out..."

...

The next day, Sasuke was found _skipping _along the street, whistling a happy tune, waving happily at everyone.

"Dude, Sasuke, what the hell has you so happy!" Naruto cried out, in one of his few moments of lucidity, ero-senning standing next to him with a scroll in hand and a wide grin on his face. "Are you sick or something?!"

Sasuke gave him a wide, toothy grin and a dreamy sigh. "What's _not_ to be happy about, my best friend? The sky is blue, the birds are singing and the flowers..." He took in a deep inhalation of a large rose. "... smell so beautiful!"

Jiraiya couldn't help but jump in and interrupt the boy. "And you got laid."

Impossibly, Sasuke's smile got wider, much like Naruto's face-splitting grins, and seemed to _sparkle_ in the sun. "And I got laid!"

Inoichi would never find if the following catatonia of Naruto was caused because of his recovering mind or if something else had happened.

...

"That's why I told you, live a miserably, small life! Run, run and cling to life if you want to live-" Itachi's well-practiced monologue would have gone on for longer, but Sasuke had other plans.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever, can we get this on, I'm getting late to my date with Haku-chan, do you even know how she gets when Jiraiya-sama releases a new Icha-Icha? I tell you, this woman can bend herself into a knot!"

Seeing a dribble of blood going down Sasuke's nose, Itachi was worried! After all, how could he redeem his clan and his own sins if his little brother wasn't absolutely focused on his death? So, using his Sharingan, he dove into Sasuke's mind and used the Tsukiyomi, the greatest genjutsu, to trap Sasuke into a world of his own imagining.

A world where, instead of Sasuke, _Haku_ was being the one tortured.

"In this world, I will torture your lover for the next seventy-two hours, mercylessly tearing her apart and raping her until she begins to enjo-" A sudden, powerful burst of chakra interrupted the Uchiha Traitor.

Itachi had a small second of time to wonder where the Snake Sannin's seal had gone, since he knew his brother had been marked.

"HAKU! NOOO**OOO**_**OOO!**_" The world exploded into white.

Just like the soul fragment inside Sasuke found out first-hand, love _does_ have a power of its own, especially one enhanced by the greatest pleasure that is known to any living species.

In a burst of power from the newly-activated Mangekyo Sharingan, fused with the most powerful emotion Sasuke could harness, Itachi found himself trapped into a Tsukiyomi of his brother's creation; a world filled with crystal skyscrappers and... a crescent moon?!

"How dare you get between our love! By the power of our love combined, I will punish you, in the name of Venus!" Sasuke, in an extremely high-pitched voice declared and, before the S-ranked nuke-nin had time to react, an army of Sasuke-clones dressed in the most _ridiculous_, _ludicrous_ and _girly_ sailor fuku descended on him, bearing chains made of _golden hearts_ of all things.

"_**AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!**_" Was the sound of Itachi's mind breaking.

Seeing his brother fall twitching to the ground, brain matter oozing out of his nostrils, Sasuke grinned maliciously at his brother. "Now you know what I go through every time Haku-chan gets an addiction that requires role-play." Then his expression softened to one of pity. "Though, you poor, poor bastard, I got to admit that at least in my case, _she_'s the one to wear them."

"And you say _I_'m the insanely cruel guy..." Naruto commented off-handedly over Kisame's torn up body; without Itachi there to support him, even Samehada couldn't drain the entirety of the chakra Naruto's Kyuubi-enhanced Sensatsu Haken technique. As a result, the arrogant fish-nin found out how exactly being shaved apart feels like, this time from a different perspective than his usual.

...

When Madara came to Sasuke in the middle of the night, hoping to kill his young lover and twist the boy to his own machinations, he miscalculated one, very _minor_ thing.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Imagine a sex-deprived woman who _finally_ got her chosen husband for some one-on-one time after _three years of waiting_.

And imagine it during _that_ time of her month.

Then multiply by a dozen to account for the just-as-frustrated husband of said woman.

'Tobi' learned a whole new way to put his name to the test; Sasuke used him as a test subject for his new "Ultimate Hidden Forbidden Secret Uchiha Fire Technique: Intestinal Track Ignition".

The fireworks was a nice touch.

_**A/N: My mind's very disturbing, isn't it?**_


End file.
